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View Full Version : Amphibians as GM's aide?



cyst13
Apr 16th, '04, 08:41 AM
I was recently lamenting with a friend that I don't have enough time in my busy schedule to write good games any more. I wished aloud that I could somehow just come up with the basic ideas for the campaign and have some one else actually write it all up for me. He said that he had worked out this very arrangement with his pet frog. Apparently amphibians are naturally creative since they occupy that liminal position between aquatic and terrestrial. Also, since they were the first animals to evolve to live on land, they have a vast store of real world knowledge inherent in their genomes.

This all sounded great to me, so I purchased a bullfrog from my local pet shop and tried to set it to work. That's where the problem started. This frog didn't do a damn thing! It just sat there for hours, often hopping away from the work area altogether. At first I thought the problem might be that the frog was unfamiliar with the Hero System. I think I remember reading somewhere that most amphibians favor systems like GURPS and D20. So I sat the frog down in front of FReD for a few hours to get it familiarized, even turning the pages for it. Talk about an exercise in frustration! I could barely get this critter to look at the text and it offered me no indication that it in any way comprehended the gist of the rules. Needless to say, since the frog doesn't understand the first thing about Hero, it has been no help to me at all in the game writing dept.

Unfortunately, I am no longer in contact with the guy who recommended amphibian GM's aides to me, but at the time, he assured me that many GMs have had remarkable success with not only frogs but newts, salamanders, toads and even pollywogs. I just don't know where I've gone wrong. Would I have better success with a frog caught in the wild? I've heard that the breeding programs for pet stores select for docility. Perhaps a frog intelligent enough to find its own food and evade predators would be able to create point-balanced NPCs. Are there any good reward/punishment techniques to teach frogs to write good games?

If any Herophiles have had success in training amphibians to write games for them, I would be thrilled to benefit from your wisdom.

devlin1
Apr 16th, '04, 08:46 AM
Try cutting the pills in half next time.

Ben Seeman
Apr 16th, '04, 09:29 AM
Or using a different type of pill altogether. :joint: :drink: :smoke:

BobGreenwade
Apr 16th, '04, 10:12 AM
The only advice I can offer is: don't use polliwogs. They're hardly mature enough to even play the game, let alone write adventures for it.

Blue
Apr 16th, '04, 10:41 AM
On Mythbusters (Discovery Channel) they subjected a host of amphibious animals to Clockwork-Orange-like testing involving various RPGs and at the end of the week they could still not run a game beyond the character generation phase.

This myth was started as the result of a statement at a convention, when a buyer picked up a copy of the Cyborg Commando RPG and stated "My frog can write better than this!" The statement was overheard and the myth has been propogated ever since.

lemming
Apr 16th, '04, 03:39 PM
Well Blue, I'd still like to see a frog tackle Sidekick. There might be a market.

Blue
Apr 17th, '04, 03:55 PM
Looks like there's a new supplement on the way to tackle this problem.

lemming
Apr 17th, '04, 09:14 PM
Someone should use that as an avatar. :D

Blue
Apr 18th, '04, 09:05 AM
I'll post it in the NGD "Make a new avatar" thread and see if anyone wants it.

Trencher
Apr 19th, '04, 08:14 AM
I don't know how good Frogs are with roleplaying games, but they are making some good miniature games.

cyst13
Apr 19th, '04, 07:13 PM
I thank all of you Herophiles for the feedback. I finally have succeeded in getting my bullfrog to whip up some adventure material. He's produced several dozen pages so far. Since the solution involved the use of illegal amphetamines, I'm afraid I can't go into detail (you never know when the Patriot Act is going to spring into action). I really appreciate all the encouragement I received.

Now all I have to do is find someone to translate these damn frog-scribbles!