Help needed!

[ShelleyCM]

My husband is a wonderful GM. He ran some of the most vivid Traveller, Champions, and historical games I've ever played in (the game set in Constantinople in 1000 AD where the PCs had psionic powers was *awesome*!) He was a major creative force behind the Chessmen games, too.

The trouble is that he hasn't run a game in years -- I mean, not since 1995! He does most of his gaming online these days (right now it's MOO3 & Earth and Beyond) and while he'll play in games and he has fun, he could take or leave them.

So here's the question: how to get him interested in running again?

Please note: PG-rated suggestions only.

-Shelley

[Hermit]

Ooo.. not sure. Give him access to some books of various genres, see what catches his attention, what inspires him. Find something that hooks him in and he truly loves. Then (Oh so slyly) mention how it might be cool to play in something like that.

Make sure he gets the hint that if anyone DOES GM it, it ain't gonna be you

Maybe that would work?

[Vondy]

Shelley,

Primus Rocks!

I recommend blatant, unabashed bribery. Since you put a PG threshold on it I recommend: FOOD. "You run a game I make your favorite food and pat your tummy" or something like that.

If you're uncomfortable with that concept you might tell him what you just told us as a more palatable option: stroking the husband's ego "oh honey, you're so good" is an excellent wife to husband strong arm tactic. Trust me. I'm a husband. I know.

You could also do the mild guilt routine: "how come we never table top game anymore? Why don't you run something!" (not my preference, but every relationship is different).

One that would work on me (I don't know your fella so it could be an utter disaster, but from the looks of 'im on your website it might pass) would be: "I enjoy it when you run games. When shall I schedule your next appearance as Game Master? This week, or next week?"

You could also enlist the aid of your other table-top group members in a nefarious conspiracy to snare him: have them start echoing your sentiments to him.

Or your could do all of them. Sort of a wifely "shock and awe" campaign.

Now I have a question for you: my wife is slowly warming to the idea of trying gaming out. How do I push her over the edge? I finally just asked her: "what sort of character do you want?", to which she answered "someone with a whip". Enter: Black Delilah. A four color dark champions character (she likes batman).

Now, how to I actually get her to take the plunge? Its been so long since I gamed for the first time I don't even remember what that was like. How to I make it easy and enjoyable for a newbie? Especially since she's... gasp! A girl.

[ShelleyCM]

Originally posted by D-Man
Shelley,

Primus Rocks!

Thank you!

Originally posted by D-Man

I recommend blatant, unabashed bribery. Since you put a PG threshold on it I recommend: FOOD. "You run a game I make your favorite food and pat your tummy" or something like that.

If you're uncomfortable with that concept you might tell him what you just told us as a more palatable option: stroking the husband's ego "oh honey, you're so good" is an excellent wife to husband strong arm tactic. Trust me. I'm a husband. I know.

You could also do the mild guilt routine: "how come we never table top game anymore? Why don't you run something!" (not my preference, but every relationship is different).

One that would work on me (I don't know your fella so it could be an utter disaster, but from the looks of 'im on your website it might pass) would be: "I enjoy it when you run games. When shall I schedule your next appearance as Game Master? This week, or next week?"

You could also enlist the aid of your other table-top group members in a nefarious conspiracy to snare him: have them start echoing your sentiments to him.

Or your could do all of them. Sort of a wifely "shock and awe" campaign.

Heh!

Well, I've tried being subtle ("remember that Constantinople game?"). I've tried being obvious (to the extent of reading him my post, which he found amusing). I've stopped running Traveller (well, actually, I've stopped running everything because I'm in law school) and suggested that perhaps he ought to take over for me (since he's been playing Traveller since I was 6!) -- and no luck! It's maddening.

I do like the idea of working on the other guys in the group, though -- that's sneaky. I like it.

Or maybe I could start an email campaign here: everyone write to mcm@mactyre.net and tell Matthew to run Traveller for me!

Originally posted by D-Man

Now I have a question for you: my wife is slowly warming to the idea of trying gaming out. How do I push her over the edge? I finally just asked her: "what sort of character do you want?", to which she answered "someone with a whip". Enter: Black Delilah. A four color dark champions character (she likes batman).

Now, how to I actually get her to take the plunge? Its been so long since I gamed for the first time I don't even remember what that was like. How to I make it easy and enjoyable for a newbie? Especially since she's... gasp! A girl.

I'd suggest having other girls in the game to start with -- if she's not alone, it'll make it a lot easier. In some places, that can be a tall order to fill. But if it's doable, that's a great way to start.

Other suggestions:

Have the game at your house. (Familiar territory -- gamer dens can be kind of creepy.)

Keep the game small. (Also, invite people you know she likes -- if the larger group has a problem with it, tell them tough -- this is her intro to gaming.)

Keep the early plots/problems fairly simple to solve -- NOT because she couldn't figure out the puzzles, but because all the genre conventions that most gamers know are totally new to her. If she gets it quickly, you can always complicate the situation, but if she doesn't, she'll be frustrated.

And a female strong-arm tactic: volunteer to take her to dinner and a romantic comedy the next day.

Good luck!
Shelley

[ShelleyCM]

Originally posted by Hermit
Ooo.. not sure. Give him access to some books of various genres, see what catches his attention, what inspires him. Find something that hooks him in and he truly loves. Then (Oh so slyly) mention how it might be cool to play in something like that.

Make sure he gets the hint that if anyone DOES GM it, it ain't gonna be you

Maybe that would work?

Well, he DID make off with Star HERO before I could even look at it -- it came in the mail today! I'm hoping that will help.

Shelley

[Chris Goodwin]

Two words: Strip Champions.

Okay, so the text of the suggestion is PG-rated....

[lemming]

Originally posted by ShelleyCM
So here's the question: how to get him interested in running again?

Hmmm. Kidnapping him, locking him in a closet, reformatting his hard drive, hmmm. maybe not.

Are there any subjects that he would want to run a game about? You could see if there are any willing players in the area.

What made him decide to stop running?

[lemming]

Originally posted by ShelleyCM
I do like the idea of working on the other guys in the group, though -- that's sneaky. I like it.

Naw. That would never work.

Originally posted by Shelley

Or maybe I could start an email campaign here: everyone write to mcm@mactyre.net and tell Matthew to run Traveller for me!

Which reminds me: He said he was going to reply to my email questions about his character. Tell him he'll get a picture if he answers! If he doesn't, I know where he lives.

[misterdeath]

Baseball bat and a Stun Gun?

Try the rational approach. "Honey, why haven't you ran anything for a while. You're an awesome GM, and I'd love to play in one of your games."

See if you can coax out of him the reasons why he won't run. Alleviate his concerns.

Something's keeping him from doing it. Find out what it is, and eliminate the problem.

If you're looking for Sci Fi, letting him drool over Star Hero is good. As a long time Traveller player, I kinda like the Terran Empire setting, and by using that he can cut down on universe creation time and effort.

Get the book, wave it in front of him, and don't let him see it until he promises to run something?

D

[Celt]

Consider the possibility that he doesn't want to GM or that he's not as interested in tabletop play as he used to be. I'd say ask him about GMing and see how he feels. If he doesn't respond enthusiastically don't push it.

You said he plays in games but it seemed like it was not a regular thing. Try running a game at the table yourself, scheduled for every week or every other week. Let him get his juices flowing by playing. This is more likely to produce a positive response than any other approach IMO.

A campaign with a GM who is pressured into running is usually short-lived.

PS: Posting his email address is defintiely not the way to go. Bet some enterprising readers here will take the ball and run with it despite the fact you were only considering the option.

[misterdeath]

Originally posted by D-Man
Now, how to I actually get her to take the plunge? Its been so long since I gamed for the first time I don't even remember what that was like. How to I make it easy and enjoyable for a newbie? Especially since she's... gasp! A girl.

Ok, do you have any idea what she's going to like to do? Is she going to want to kick ass and take names, interact with things, talk to people, figure things out, or what?

If you don't know, something relatively simple as a first adventure that incorporates a little bit of everything. That way you can see what she likes to do, and go from there.

I'd probably start off with a Solo Adventure, mainly because throwing a newbie in the midst of a group of hardened gamers can be intimidating.

Remember that everything is new, and her preconceptions will be formed in these first games. So, she won't know about good tactics, playing the speed chart, what the maneuvers do, and what have you.

So, that you'll have to help with. So, combat should be pretty simple, until she gets the hang of things.

Once you've ran the character for a couple of sessions, sit down with her, and get some feedback. Character design changes, adventure planning, and what she felt worked and didn't work.

Give advice then. But make sure that you don't preach. Advise, then let her make the decisions.

Hmmm. That's about all right now. Gotta get back to work.

D

[ShelleyCM]

Originally posted by lemming
Hmmm. Kidnapping him, locking him in a closet, reformatting his hard drive, hmmm. maybe not.

Are there any subjects that he would want to run a game about? You could see if there are any willing players in the area.

What made him decide to stop running?

It was a time/energy issue. After graduating, his first jobs involved a lot of on-call and nights, and it wasn't really practicable. (These are the first instances of Matthew falling asleep during games -- before that he used to relentlessly tease our friends who fell asleep while gaming!)

It's not a matter of not having inspiration -- he reads constantly, almost exclusively sci-fi and sometimes fantasy.

And I'm sure we could cough up a few players here in PDX.

Shelley

[ShelleyCM]

Originally posted by Celt
You said he plays in games but it seemed like it was not a regular thing. Try running a game at the table yourself, scheduled for every week or every other week. Let him get his juices flowing by playing. This is more likely to produce a positive response than any other approach IMO.

Ah, if only we had that kind of time!

PS: Posting his email address is defintiely not the way to go. Bet some enterprising readers here will take the ball and run with it despite the fact you were only considering the option.

Oh, I don't know. For one thing, I'm aware of how his sense of humor works. And another: I'm willing to try the bludgeon -- after all, I've been trying subtle and not-so-subtle for EIGHT years.

Shelley

[Derek Hiemforth]

D-man suggested a mild guilt routine. I'd suggest a not-so-mild one.

Try doing some extra nice things for him just out of the blue. Then after each one, when he's commenting on what a nice thing you did, mention that you'd really love it if he ran a game. Eventually his conscience will get to him... here's his wife doing all these nice things for him, and he won't even run a game for her!

You can also try using special occasions as leverage. If you've got a birthday or anniverary coming up, tell him that him running something would be a great present!

There's also the reverse of the advice you gave about introducing the female S/O to gaming. If there's something he really likes to do but you're not as enthusiastic about, make a deal with him that you'll do that with him if he'll run a game for you.

Lastly, you could always club him over the head with it. (Some guys need this.) Just say, "Hey! I'm your wife, dammit! You're supposed to want to do nice things for me! Please run a game!"

[Talon]

Originally posted by ShelleyCM
Well, he DID make off with Star HERO before I could even look at it -- it came in the mail today! I'm hoping that will help.

Make sure he sees Terran Empire too!