Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

[Gnaskar]

Quotes from a standard dnd campaign I play in. First the characters:
Arkai: Technically a rogue; heavy munchkin with 4 classes at level 8 total, a diplomatic face man and moderating factor in the party; human.
Sam (me): Elf druid archer who rides to battle on a giant bat (called Batbat); chaotic neutral, and happy to do anything she considers fun; hates dwarves and has slight superiority complex; favorite combat tactic is dropping one enemy on another from 50ft up.
Durin: dwarf cleric; famous for not paying attention; Sam’s constant rival.
Kip: Ten year old centaur with no class, going barbarian eventually; party tank, and trolley; carried a boat around at some point; currently carrying a dead paladin skeleton we found.
Batbat: my pet bat, has cloak and boots of elvenkind, and acts like a stealth bomber.

Sneaking out of town:
Durin: I'm pretty sneaky, I can make lights and stuff.
...
Durin (Lawful Good Cleric): Or I could summon a Monster to kill people, and we could sneak out using it as a distraction.
...
Arkai: We could do shuttle traffic with Batbat.
Sam: No, he can't carry Kip or Durin
Arkai: We could push Durin up into Kip's behind, and dress Kip up as a moose.
Sam: I have a feeling we've done that one before...
GM: Me too.
Arkai: Good old times.
...
Durin: I could dig out.
Sam: he's a dwarf, he should be able to dig 500m in a night.
GM: He probably should be a badger to do that...
All players at once: He summons a dire badger.
GM: *Looks about in suprise*
Arkai: What, You weren't expecting that?

GM has us roll spot checks in the dark:
Arkai: We have to trust Durin on this one. (He has Darkvision)
Durin: I roll a 1.
GM: You see a Pink Elefant behind you.
Durin (incharacter to Arkai): Can I keep it?
Arkai: yeah, sure, what?
Durin: I go to pet it.
GM: You fall over a root, hit your head and take 1 damage.
Durin: I can still keep it, right?

We try to summerize what we know:
Sam: We always trust things the undead tell us.
...
Arkai: maybe we're wrong and the creatures are nice..
Sam: You mean the corpse lied to us?!

Combat question:
Sam: Can I take a five foot step strait up?

Sam calls a Flame Strike: FLOWER POWER
(the attack did 6 damage total)

[Steve]

In 4th Edition D&D there is a character class called the Warlord who can heal with an ability called Inspiring Word. Basically, they heal with a pep talk to the target, and that target can also be themself. One of the PC's is a Warlord.

When he first used this ability to heal himself, the joke around the table was that he was looking into a mirror in the back of his shield and said:

"I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and darn it, people like me!"

[Casper]

Happening right now between two players who are convinced that each tried to kill the other :
"He tried to kill me!"
"You attacked me!"
"You attacked first."
"Nyu-uh!"
"Uh huh!"
"Who's this?" (indicating the corpse of one of the assasin's)
"It was you!"
"What?"
"It was you, and then I killed him, and he wasn't you anymore!'
"What? Then who am I?"
"Not dead!!!"

Lol, one of the few times Tinner and I actually agreeded on something. Actually that might be the only thing we ever agreed on...

[Steve]

Some quotes from the first couple of adventures of my 13th District campaign:

Casefile #1: The Lost Child

"The Chinese mystic is the most normal one among us."
"That’s the scariest thing I’ve ever seen, and I’ve been in prison."
"If it’s breakable, blow it up."
"It’s like honey with an undertaste of arsenic."


Casefile #2: Night Hunters

"May I smoke? You’re already smoking hot."
"A nightclub called The Glamour Room? Sounds like a clue."
"She could be a vampire, but she pays well."
"The guy’s like a walking EMP."

[Manic Typist]

Lol, one of the few times Tinner and I actually agreeded on something. Actually that might be the only thing we ever agreed on...

Well, you guys both agreed that the situation needed to change.

It just never did. I swear, I've never seen an instance where people just seemed to communicate... PAST each other... like that. You guys couldn't even communicate enough to kill each other!

It was something else.

[Susano]

From a recent movie discussion:

"Joseph Stalin fighting ninja would have been awesome."

[input.jack]

The characters in my new supers campaign were trying to pick a group name...

Dart: We could call ourselves "The Champions"

Atlas: Theres a Queen song we need to get the rights to...

GM: "Im sorry, we couldnt get the rights to that song. But we -did- get another song. But it means we have to change our team name to the "Fat Bottomed Girls"

AJAX: I object!

Sharada (the hawt alien chick): YOU object!?!!

[CoreBrute]

Here's something that happened in the first few sessions of a new Super Campaign I just joined.

We were a large group, about 7 players and all hunting for about 3 Predator like aliens. We entered a dark room where we could barely see. All the bricks went near the back while the mentalists and martial artists stayed near the back.

Hamish (an annoying Teleporter): Could someone press the light switch.

No one listens to him. In a huff, he walks over and does it himself.
An explosion occurs, Con stuns him and most of the others (who all happened to be non-bricks). The bricks were unaffected and then the Predator things attacked.

Hamish (OOC): Did the lights turn on at least?

This reminded the GM about the light, who was about to let as all fight with full vision. "No the light does not turn on."

[Major Tom]

Here's something that happened in the first few sessions of a new Super Campaign I just joined.

We were a large group, about 7 players and all hunting for about 3 Predator like aliens. We entered a dark room where we could barely see. All the bricks went near the back while the mentalists and martial artists stayed near the back.

Hamish (an annoying Teleporter): Could someone press the light switch.

No one listens to him. In a huff, he walks over and does it himself.
An explosion occurs, Con stuns him and most of the others (who all happened to be non-bricks). The bricks were unaffected and then the Predator things attacked.

Hamish (OOC): Did the lights turn on at least?

This reminded the GM about the light, who was about to let as all fight with full vision. "No the light does not turn on."

Och, the haggis was well and truly in the fire for this group...

I have to wonder, though, if some of the group's members were sorely tempt-
ed to have Hamish experience a "friendly fire" incident.



Major Tom

[input.jack]

Och, the haggis was well and truly in the fire for this group...

I have to wonder, though, if some of the group's members were sorely tempt-
ed to have Hamish experience a "friendly fire" incident.



Major Tom

Im not sure switching on the light warrants a fragging...

[Major Tom]

Maybe not a fragging, but a low-power EB or a sledgehammer-augmented
Gibbs-slap upside the head would be slightly appropriate.


Major Tom

[Vulcan]

Every so often my players will wander well off course, to the point that they're in danger of loosing track of the plot. Usually I just let them go with it, as long as I can wing something (until the plot they lost track of comes back to bite them...). But sometimes I can't, so the players come upon a pond, or river, or fish tank, and I tell them...

"You see some little red fish in the water. They look sorta like herrings..."

[Egyptoid]

StarFox jets off without the team with one of the Katana Girls
to post-apocalyptic San Francisco, just to settle a bet.

High Evo: I hope StarFox doesn't do anything stupid while alone with that girl.


==================================

Later there's a huge fight. Main enemy is a space-born energy projector, a great flyer. Earth-bound Hercules desperately wants to punch this bad guy. so He asks the telekinetic for help:

Hercules: "Toss me."
Magnetix: "What?"
Hercules: "I cannae jump the distance, you'll have to toss me! Oh — don't tell Star-Fox."
Magnetix: "Not a word."


==================================

Later Hercules is blinded for a long long time. The bad guy Energy Projector is laying stunned on the ground somewhere nearby. This guy has star-based powers, and so has been radiating heat (eb), light (flash), and radiation (transform) all over, in a big radius around himself, all afternoon. His body is as hot as star-matter, and its laying there melting the dirt. Hercules needs to land a deathblow with his mace, but laments his blindness.

High Evo: Aim for the hissing sound !


==================================

[CoreBrute]

Och, the haggis was well and truly in the fire for this group...

I have to wonder, though, if some of the group's members were sorely tempted to have Hamish experience a "friendly fire" incident.


Major Tom

Im not sure switching on the light warrants a fragging...

Oh trust me this was only the tip of the iceberg. By the end of it, we would have blasted him to shreds if he wasn't our form of transport (Group teleportation). And I'm talking OOC.

He has left the group though, so now we hope we can get these new guys to join and stick to it.

[Remjin]

We're introducing my 9 year old daughter to roleplaying via D&D 4E, and there have been more than a few quotes that I thought were funny...

When encountered with halfling guards to the nearby swamp village while on a diplomatic mission, we are asked by the guards why they should allow us to see their chief...

Cynthia(PC name) OOC: <shyly> I know what I want to say now... "SURRENDER NOW OR I'LL BURN YOU WITH MY WITCHFIRE!"

**************************************

While fighting in a dungeon, she has just chopped a guard drake with her axe, finishing it. "Yay, I ended its life!"

**************************************

Cynthia dies, prompting some sadness from her. She perks up as she starts erasing madly, "I know, I'll just change her name!"

**************************************

She gets frustrated about something, and smacks her fist into the table... "darnit!... OW! ow ow ow ow ow ow ow... that hurt..."

**************************************

Suffice it to say there have been more than a few classic moments here and its been a pretty funny ride. I can't remember them all, but these are some of the more easily described...