Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

[Shadow Hawk]

Saturday's DnD 4th edition. The cast of characters...

Baron Shadowdeath, Eladrin Wizard
Rangrin, Human Artificer
Ciaphas, Human Fighter
Jett, Gensai Swordmage
Atolucus, Human Rogue
Aleric, Human Paladin
Silver, Elven Ranger
Torm, Dragonborn Cleric

At game start, we were in town, doing projects and buying stuff...
GM: Rangrim, give me *nine* intelligence rolls.
Aleric: What is he doing?
Rangrim: I'm making a new item.
Aleric: Is it safe to be in this county?
Silver: Is it safe to be on this continent?
Torm: Is it safe to be on this plane?

Teasing one of the players...
Torm: Now we're being cruel.
Silver: It's just Ciaphas.

Traveling to a new land...
Ciaphas: We're going to the mine in Feces.
Torm: I'm sure it's not pronounced like that.
Ciaphas: The country is called Feces, or Fascist, or something.
GM: Feskes!

Torm: Put the horse on the back of the carpet, just in case.
Ciaphas: My horse is trained.
Aleric: Carpet trained?

Describing a victim of Silver's arrow assault
Torm: Hit by so many arrows, the body doesn't touch the ground.

Silver confused
Silver: I just know I heard what I saw.

New magic item...
GM: I will deal with the physics of the magic regenerating sandwich later.

We find impaled bodies
Rangrin: I guess they got the point.

Battle with undead
GM: The scarecrow siphons your soul.
Torm: Well, that sucks.

The Paladin, Fighter, Swordmage, and Cleric lead the charge
Aleric: Go Team Tank!

Silver: Is he undead or demon?
GM: He's more undead than you can imagine.
Silver: Oh, good. (he meant it, too)

Autolucus: (ooc)If I kill Ciaphas, is he worth 2000xp?

Silver: I fire 800 arrows at his face!
Torm: That will leave a mark.

GM: He's bloodied, Aleric's turn.
Aleric: But wait, there's more!

Jett: He takes 22 force damage.
Torm: Evil Jedi!
Aleric: Get a darkside point.

GM describes the terrain
GM: There's a kidney you could try to hide behind.

Silver senses something
Silver: There could be an earthquake soon.
Ciaphas: How soon?
Torm: Eight, seven, six...

GM: I'm sure that someday the dwarves will forgive you.

Atolucus: I'll stab you in the eye!
Ciaphas: I can survive that.
Aleric: Try both.

Ciaphas: I know you can't just pull magic items off the trees. I've tried it.

Ciaphas: They always attack me instead of the horse.
Torm: So, you're the horse's armor.
Rangrin: At least he has some use.
Aleric: Yes, he's the driver.
Rangrim: It's like the horse is his familiar.
Aleric: Yes, he's very familiar with his horse.
Torm: Animal Husbandry?

[Arkham]

So, what else _is_ in the Bermuda Triangle anyway... besides Luchadores.

I don't need 100 virgins, I got a horse.

[Enforcer84]

Story of my life.

But I'm sure they're happy with you just the same. I mean I can't stay with all of them

[Egyptoid]

"okay now just line up behind them and pound away till they're gone"

Spoiler:

show spoiler

Star Fleet Battles, referring to a downed Aft Shield

[Greywind]

...het...

[Yar]

Collected from a short (6 adventure) campaign centered around medium-power heros in a White Wolf / World of Darkness-esque Washington, DC.

GM: "Yes Pete, you probably can trade your soul for a new crossbow. Don't tempt me."

Player 1: "I don't know how to SCUBA."
Player 2: "All you have to do is breathe and let the shark drag you."

Player: "I don't want to let [the chained up werewolf] go. Oh, what the hell - I'm a dragon."

OOC: "Remember to buy your chainsaw with Darkness to Sound."

GM: "He's a demon lord."
Player 1: "Any weaknesses?"
Player 2: "Lactose intolerant."
Player 3: "We throw cows at him."

"I can find out if she's normal. [To the GM] What's her DCV?"

Player 1: "There's no down side to stealing evil demonic artifacts!"
Player 2: "Says the corpse on the floor."

Player with prehensile tongue: "I taste the Force Field... it's evil!"

Player 1: "Why does it suck to live in DC?"
Player 2: "It's all the demons."
Player 3: "Are we still talking in-game?"


And, of course, character concepts that didn't make it:

An assassin with Aid powers that only work on vampires: Slayer the Vampire Buffer.

An undead creture of the night who kills his victims with a floor polisher: Vampy the Buffer Slayer.

[DocMan]

Saturday's DnD 4th edition. The cast of characters...

Baron Shadowdeath, Eladrin Wizard
Rangrin, Human Artificer
Ciaphas, Human Fighter
Jett, Gensai Swordmage
Atolucus, Human Rogue
Aleric, Human Paladin
Silver, Elven Ranger
Torm, Dragonborn Cleric

That is quite an ensemble! 8 players?

Doc

[NestorDRod]

"okay now just line up behind them and pound away till they're gone"

Spoiler:

show spoiler

Star Fleet Battles, referring to a downed Aft Shield

Which reminds me of the most suggestive line uttered by a character in Star Wars:

"Pull out, Wedge! You're not doing any good back there!"

[Vulcan]

"okay now just line up behind them and pound away till they're gone"

Spoiler:

show spoiler

Star Fleet Battles, referring to a downed Aft Shield

Spoiler:

show spoiler

If it was a Klingon, that could be really dangerous facing the aft 'phaser hose'.

[Peregrine]

Spoiler:

show spoiler

If it was a Klingon, that could be really dangerous facing the aft 'phaser hose'.

Spoiler:

show spoiler

Only in the row of hexes extending directly behind the ship. The #4 shield can be hit by a ship "offline" of that hex row.

[nexus]

Another one from Dylan.

The group has encountered another group of survivors mostly composed of teenagers and children. One of the younger members committed on Dylan's baby bump apparently not buying the story there was a baby in there and that it was more likely she had to burp really bad. This resulted in Dylan experiencing a bit of a hormonal freak out and drawing some odd conclusions.

Bill: OK...that was weird. Bill was used to being the one who frightened children. He turned and trotted after Dylan, catching her in the room they shared. He laid a gentle hand on her shoulder and said, "Something you want to talk about?"

Dylan had her arms around her stomach protectively, but stayed turned away from Bill. "What if she's right? What if there's not a baby? What if...what if...well I've had these dreams that I'm...I'm just getting fat, or that I go to have the baby and it's dead..."

Bill: "Honey, the baby's fine," Bill told her, laying a hand over her growing belly. "And you're fine. And we could all stand to get a little fatter than we are, but there's a beautiful baby inside you regardless."


Dylan: "What...what if that kid's like...psychic or something. And she ~knows~ there isn't a baby?"

Bill frowned. For once, the expression on his face was completely readable: that was a **** of a goofy thing to say. But when he spoke, his experience with pregnant women and their anxieties showed. His voice was soothing and calm as he said, "Honey, I really don't think the little girl is psychic. I think she doesn't know where babies come from."

For the record, she didn't know and was not psychic. She thought you found babies in the bushes because when the older members of their impromptu tribe went looking for a private place to make out and she asked what they were doing her older sister sarcastically told her "lookin' to get a baby..."

[Klytus]

Spoiler:

show spoiler

Only in the row of hexes extending directly behind the ship. The #4 shield can be hit by a ship "offline" of that hex row.

*wistful sigh* I miss SFB...

[jkwleisemann]

GM describes the terrain
GM: There's a kidney you could try to hide behind.

So *that's* how Jack did it!

"Nothing to see here, just a severed kidney wandering through Whitechapel, pay no attention to the blood-soaked man behind it...."

[Greywind]

*wistful sigh* I miss SFB...

I wasn't aware that it went anywhere...

[Lucius]

I wasn't aware that it went anywhere...

Where no man has gone before!

Lucius Alexander

To boldly go where no palindromedary has gone before!