Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

[Susano]

Session IV of Unknown Armies in which our... "heroes" must deal with various celebrities who've risen from the grave and assumed the characteristics of the Seven Deadly Sins.

The Cast:
Tony "Bender" Bendetti -- Mafia made man and dipsomancer.
Paulie "Fender" -- Mafia wheelman
Sam Tsung -- Avatar of the Masterless Man
Elmore James Winchester -- Avatar of the Pilgrim

The Undead:
Toshiro Mifune -- Greed
Frank Sintatra -- Gluttony
Ernest Hemmingway -- Lust
John Lennon -- Wrath
Marlin Brando -- Sloth
Estelle Getty -- we don't know

This leaves Pride/Vanity and Envy. We also suspect Elvis is heading to Vegas from Graceland. If we meet him, we'll probably be able to determine who Estelle is. Er... was. Sam destroyed her, John, and Marlin. Paulie took out Ernest. And Bender destroyed Toshiro and Frank.

Sam Tsung (OOC): How would we know if Yoko Ono came back from the dead?"

Bender (OOC): "Standard Unknown Armies Scene Number 23."

Paulie (OOC): "[Using] Hookers as character witnesses... let's ponder that for a minute."

Bender (to Paulie): "I forgive you for running over me."

Pauile's OOC observation on life in the game: "I am fate's butt-puppet."

Elmore James Winchester: "I wonder what it's like to be a walking corpse?"
Sam (OOC): "Sam doesn't dislike you enough to sat 'Want to find out?'."

Pauile (OOC): If you have a Hemmingway lasting more than four hours."

Sam comments to the GM on the current state of affairs: "John Lennon is the most dangerous guy in the room right now."

[Houston GM]

Out of character:
comment: "That's just stupid. His wheels aren't spinning at all."
response: "I'd say his wheel is spinning, but the hamster is dead."

[BoloOfEarth]

I forgot to take notes at last night's Champions game, so I'm going off my (rather spotty) memory here.

Sentinel, in secret ID, is tutoring Juan: a handsome, charming, athletic college student from Spain. After he gets a decent grade on his midterm exam, he stops by her place to thank her. Sentinel's husband Frank and adopted 16 year-old daughter Sarah are both there when Juan pulls up on his new Harley. While Frank and Juan are talking about motorcycles, Sarah pulls her mom aside.
Sarah: This is the guy you've been tutoring? He's seriously yummy!
Sentinel: You, in the house! Finish your homework!
Sarah: Gotta say, mom, kudos for showing restraint. (pause) You *did* show restraint, didn't you?
Sentinel: IN THE HOUSE! NOW!!!

Juan lets Frank try out his Harley. Being a good guy, Frank drives it with respect.
Juan: Tsk. You drive like my grandmother.

[Edit: Forgot this one]
Sarah comes out side with a glass of lemonade for Juan.
Sarah: I thought you might like a nice glass of lemonade.
Sentinel: In. The. House.
GM: (Imitating Sarah) It is awfully warm outside. Maybe you'd like to take off your shirt...

Meanwhile, Synergy is patrolling the city when he's attacked by a group of mutant-hunting agents. As they're preparing to open fire on him again, a caped figure flies up and positions himself between Synergy and the agents. (Props to Yar Underwood for the great character.)
Caped Man: Hark ye and listen, foul miscreants! I am Stalwart, a duly deputized member of PRIMUS and latest defender of this fair city. You are hereby notified that you are disturbing the peace, and furthermore you stand accused of illegal actions and are therefore required to cease and desist all actions that would place you in violation of local statues. Lay down your weapons and submit to lawful arrest forthwith, ere I be forced to…
Subliminal (OOC): That's more than a zero-phase soliloquy!
GM (smiles): You're right. He's blowing his second half-phase giving his speech.

The agents unload their weapons on Stalwart, blasting him back into, well, more like *through* a building.
Stalwart: "... ere I be forced to disarm you will all appropriate force..."
Sentinel (OOC): He didn't even stop talking? Now, that's tough!

After Stalwart applies to join S-Squad, the heroes are looking over his resume, including past names he's had...
Synergy: Captain Incredible? Green Sergeant? Incredible Longhorn? (pause) Flying Thunder?!

...and the superhero teams he's belonged to...
Synergy: God's Warriors? In Utah? Are they a Mormon superhero team? (pause) Hey, the last three teams on this list are defunct!
GM: Well, that was over 15 years ago.

The heroes are contacting the other teams on Stalwart's resume, starting with the Champions.
Defender: He is a capable, enthusiastic, forthright defender of the peace whom the Champions worked with on several occasions. We never invited him to join; he did ask about joining us at one point but we felt his personality would not be compatible with the team dynamic.
Subliminal: Hey, I like the way he said that! Can we use it?

Styx has a side chat with Witchcraft, whom he's dated a few times.
Witchcraft: Really, the guy spent half the time getting blasted through a building or two and then flying back into the fray. It was kinda embarrassing.

Serendipity calls the Gold Coast Avengers (in Miami), and she talks to the team's speedster, Bolt.
Bolt: Hey, how's it going, things here are going great, we've had some nice weather, you should really stop down here sometime and visit, we could put you up here, no problem, though you might want to avoid spring break time, it gets kinda nuts down here, but then there's the coeds, so that's good, but hey, you're a girl, so that probably doesn't interest you, but maybe it does, nothing wrong with that, I'm not making any judgements or anything, live and let live I always say, so what can I do for you?
Serendipity: Well, we got an application to join our team, someone named Stalwart, but he was on your team as... (checks resume) yeah, Captain Incredible.
Bolt: Oh, yeah, I remember CI, he left just a little bit after I joined, so I don't know him very well, he's an okay guy, bit of a tool though, I think CI likes to hear himself talk, what with how he verbally browbeats the bad guys with stuff out of, like, a 1950s comic book, can ya belieive it, I mean, who talks like that, but hey, that's the way he is I guess...
Serendipity: Is there someone *else* there I can talk to?

The team is discussing what to do about Stalwart, and their team financier (and Serendipity's boyfriend) Aidan Beck is there too.
Synergy: So, what does Aidan think?
Aidan: Well, I...
Serendipity (stage whispering): You don't want him on the team.
Aidan: (looks at the other heroes) I'm being told that, apparently, I don't want him on the team.

Serendipity: Look at these teams that fell apart when he was on them! His first team, their financier got convicted of drug trafficking! (Looks at Aidan pointedly)
Aidan (sarcastic): Don't look at *me*, I gave up drug running *years* ago! Seriously, though, it's not like that was Stalwart's fault!
Serendipity: I'm just saying, he's bad luck. And believe me, I know bad luck!
Subliminal: Maybe you could give him some good luck.
Serendipity: Nope, it doesn't work that way. All I could do is give him *more* bad luck.
Subliminal: Ooo. He don't need that.

[Nuclear Fridge]

I would post from my current Necessary Evil Champions campaign, except…

They’re all villains. The dialogue tends to run like a blooper reel from The Osbournes TV show. “$%*@ you, you alien &$*@%. Right in your &*$@%$ ear!”

They’re saving Planet Earth, one potty-mouthed tirade at a time…

[input.jack]

One of Feline Fury's acquaintances was a guy in a full-body furry suit that left only his face exposed. He became officially known as "The Potty-Mouthed Panda", since his first appearance was chasing some guys down and beating the ever-loving tar out of them while slinging a verbal web of obscenity that legend says still hangs over parts of Los Angeles (people only think its smog ). Turns out he was doing a part-time job as a "walking billboard" for a local Chinese resteraunt, the Happy Panda Garden, when these guys robbed someone in an alley and slammed into him while fleeing the scene. He threw down the sandwich board part of his outfit and took off after them, and the color-comment heavy thrashing he gave them was caught on streaming cellphone cam! And a new "hero" is born!

[Ockham's Spoon]

Serendipity calls the Gold Coast Avengers (in Miami), and she talks to the team's speedster, Bolt.
Bolt: Hey, how's it going, things here are going great, we've had some nice weather, you should really stop down here sometime and visit, we could put you up here, no problem, though you might want to avoid spring break time, it gets kinda nuts down here, but then there's the coeds, so that's good, but hey, you're a girl, so that probably doesn't interest you, but maybe it does, nothing wrong with that, I'm not making any judgements or anything, live and let live I always say, so what can I do for you?
Serendipity: Well, we got an application to join our team, someone named Stalwart, but he was on your team as... (checks resume) yeah, Captain Incredible.
Bolt: Oh, yeah, I remember CI, he left just a little bit after I joined, so I don't know him very well, he's an okay guy, bit of a tool though, I think CI likes to hear himself talk, what with how he verbally browbeats the bad guys with stuff out of, like, a 1950s comic book, can ya belieive it, I mean, who talks like that, but hey, that's the way he is I guess...
Serendipity: Is there someone *else* there I can talk to?

Kudos for Bolt, both for the mile-a-minute-mouth that is so appropriate, and for the ability to actually talk that way extemporaneously during play. And of course because its a funny quote.

[BoloOfEarth]

Kudos for Bolt, both for the mile-a-minute-mouth that is so appropriate, and for the ability to actually talk that way extemporaneously during play. And of course because its a funny quote.

I was particularly proud of Bolt saying, "I think CI likes to hear himself talk".

[Lucius]

One of Feline Fury's acquaintances was a guy in a full-body furry suit that left only his face exposed. He became officially known as "The Potty-Mouthed Panda", since his first appearance was chasing some guys down and beating the ever-loving tar out of them while slinging a verbal web of obscenity that legend says still hangs over parts of Los Angeles (people only think its smog ). Turns out he was doing a part-time job as a "walking billboard" for a local Chinese resteraunt, the Happy Panda Garden, when these guys robbed someone in an alley and slammed into him while fleeing the scene. He threw down the sandwich board part of his outfit and took off after them, and the color-comment heavy thrashing he gave them was caught on streaming cellphone cam! And a new "hero" is born!

Okay, I could easily believe that happening even in The World They Call Real

Lucius Alexander

Happy Palindromedary

[input.jack]

Some new Embria stuff (see my sig for pics)
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Thieves: *Sneak attack Rhiannon!*

Rhiannon's armor: *Bounces half their attacks harmlessly off her armor and she only takes a minor scrape along the ribs*

Rhiannon: I detect thieves!

Metreon: I dont recall a spell like tha-.... Oh.

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Metreon: *Finds a scroll, looks at it, and looks...TOO happy*

Varga: DONT SMEAR THE INK!

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Metreon (OOC): This was a cavalcade of suck!

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GM: The walls are racks, once filled with wine bottles. Now they are nearly empty. Broken glass litters the floor. A pair of skinless, drooling dog-things attack you!

Rhiannon (OOC): What are they, Booze-hounds?

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Chyra (OOC): *Pompous spoiled-rich-girl voice* I'M an 8th level Undead Aspect Sorceress! Do you think that I would be afraid of this dark hallway? Do you? .... Well youd-be-right! *Dashes out of the room*

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Lee: *Hits the Succubus with a Dimensional Anchor spell* She's not going anywhere!

Metreon: I love you in a way that your God probably doesnt approve of!

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Rhiannon (OOC): Wow, Varga! A 69 point Critical Hit on a Succubus! Justice just doesnt get any more poetic-ey than that!

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Metreon (OOC): Im just not comfortable with people under 30 TOUCHING anything! I always want to tell my students "Youre in college now and you THINK youre adults! But youre NOT! So just try not to move, and dont TOUCH anything until an adult, say, someone over 30 or 35, can come and help you!"

[Mjolnir74]

Quotes from a D&D 4 game

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Cast:
Baldronin: Male Dragonborn Paladin
Balinor: Male Half Elf Warlock
Thalin: Male Half Elf Warlord
Annastriana: Female Eladrin Wizard

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Background: Our Warlord likes to try diplomacy before we kill things. In one encounter, he ended up seducing a Medusa, which lead to multiple amorous negotiations, if you catch my meaning. In a later adventure, he tries diplomacy with a warren of Trolls and fails.

Annastriana: Quick Thalin, drop trow!

[Steve]

Quotes from a D&D 4 game

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Cast:
Baldronin: Male Dragonborn Paladin
Balinor: Male Half Elf Warlock
Thalin: Male Half Elf Warlord
Annastriana: Female Eladrin Wizard

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Background: The party is beginning their first adventure on the Paragon tier, King of the Trollhaunt Warrens. After a somewhat difficult trek into the swampy wilderness to find the warren, Thalin decided to try diplomacy by knocking on the front door and asking to see the king. After the GM (me) pondered such audacity for a few moments, the troll king arrived with some of his followers, leaving the party outnumbered roughly three to one.

Thalin: Well, we tried to be diplomatic.
Baldronin: I blame you for this.

Later on, the wizard moved a poison cloud spell to better cover the majority of the trolls, who happened to be tightly engaged in melee with the paladin and the warlord.

Thalin: AHHH! STOP HELPING!

[Mjolnir74]

Quotes from a D&D 4 game

----------

Cast:
Baldronin: Male Dragonborn Paladin
Balinor: Male Half Elf Warlock
Thalin: Male Half Elf Warlord
Annastriana: Female Eladrin Wizard

----------
Background: The party is beginning their first adventure on the Paragon tier, King of the Trollhaunt Warrens. After a somewhat difficult trek into the swampy wilderness to find the warren, Thalin decided to try diplomacy by knocking on the front door and asking to see the king. After the GM (me) pondered such audacity for a few moments, the troll king arrived with some of his followers, leaving the party outnumbered roughly three to one.

Thalin: Well, we tried to be diplomatic.
Baldronin: I blame you for this.

Later on, the wizard moved a poison cloud spell to better cover the majority of the trolls, who happened to be tightly engaged in melee with the paladin and the warlord.

Thalin: AHHH! STOP HELPING!

I'd rep you if I had the power to do so.

[Hugh Neilson]

Reminded of an old game where the wizard was attacked by surprise. The fighter leapt to his aid. The wizard attacked the opponent, rolled a fumble and hit the fighter instead.

Fighter: "If you want my help again, don't help me when I'm helping you."

[Rapier]

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James (ooc): [I was sneezing so had muted my mic, GM asked numerous times for me to repeat how much STUN I had done] 42. 42! 42!! DUDE!!!! FOOOOOORTY TWO!!!!!

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Josh: "SPREAD OUT!" [whereupon he activates his Duplication, forming a line of three duplicates]

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GM: He attacks you and nicks you someplace non-vital...you know, life the neck.

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[Querysphinx]

From Teh Bunneh's Bludmater D&D 4th

Boots: Dragonborn Warlord and future car insurance spokesthing
Pax: Human Fighter, a flank unto herself.
Hakkoz: Dwarf Cleric and living wall of velcro.

On Backstory:
Boots: "I come from a noble clan; we own lots of mud."

On generic boss fights.
Boots: "Ah, Captain Stereotype, we meet again."

On inspirational speeches:
Pax: "I rolled a critical success on questioning their manhood."

On Dwarven theology
Hakkoz: "I am the patron saint of burning logs."