Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

[Basil]

One I forgot,

My character, an Energy/Energy Tanker, had climbed the side of the Nuke to see if it was armed. He's a country boy and bit of a Cowboy. (He tried to drive a pickup into a Minuteman.)

Another character when he sees me on the Nuke. "That's not a tractor. Get down from there.."

Dr. Strangelove anyone?

[Narratio]

My resident brick hit his enemy, another brick, with a fire extinguisher. Body damage was way off the scale. So the extinguisher exploded with CO2 everywhere! His only comment was "I didn't think that would happen".

10 minutes before the laughter stopped.

[Remjin]

Well, let's see... this was last year... cripes, maybe 2 years ago... for nostalgia, we were playing the original basic blue box (or was it red?) D&D as our regular game had gotten cancelled. Guy is just running a game on the fly, and I'm playing a Cleric of a Feminist God because I figure I can "get chicks" that way... yes, the oddness of having a decent wisdom and still being stupid... and we were just making everything up on the fly as our world was called GeneriCo! It became a game we'd play for pick-up games and days when people couldn't make it. Just for fun, never serious, and just an excuse for stupid cliches, retarded jokes, and general tom-foolery.

GM: "You come into a large room with a bunch of tables. There's a lot of spilled ale lying around and an orc laying out on a table, obviously drunk and passed out. So what's the plan?"
Me: "He's totally out cold?"
GM: "Yes. He reeks of ale and he's drooling."
Me: "Well, I am a cleric of a feminist god..."
GM: "ummm.... okay. And...?"
Me: "I MACE HIM IN THE NUTS! cuz, y'know... feminazies love going for the gonads."

And thus our catchphrase, and the beginning move of every combat thereafter, was coined...

GM: "Okay, your initiative."
Me: "He's male, right?"
GM: "*sigh* Yes."
Me: "I..."
The Entire Party: "MACE HIM IN THE NUTS!"

I never did get any chicks... probably cuz I was the only member of the religion...

[input.jack]

In my supers game tonight, the team of teenaged heroes faced off against a crash-landed alien menace capable of shape-changing and duplicating.

The main body of the menace was 20 feet tall and scaly. Streak, the speedster, raced up the creature's back and pummeled its head repeatedly while Basilisk hit it with an eyebeam attack that rang the creature's bell.

Hard.

Stunned and reeling, the creature instinctively split intot wenty apparent copies of Streak (who is a cute little blonde, by the way).

The team looks baffled as they try to decipher which is the real Streak. Streak, meanwhile, manages to push her way out from under the pile of duplicates of herself, as they recover from being stunned.

Streak decides to launch a massive super-speed area effect attack, effectively zooming around in a tight circle and hitting each of the twenty copies of herself.

Monitor, Streak's teammate, sees Streak's whirlwind of attacks, and says, in classic sarcastic teenager voice:

"Stop hitting yourself!" ;D

[Remjin]

Hehe... "stop hitting yourself!" that's awesome. =)

[Kirby]

Again, these are all out of game, but they do reference gaming from my loving wife. I wasn't going to put them, but today's I thought everyone would enjoy.

"All I hear is 'blah, blah, blah, stormtrooper. Blah, blah, blah, the force.' I don't know what you're talking about."

"Dear, unless I specifically ask you a question about your game, I don't want you to tell me about it."

And today's: "Come over here and

watch this

about widows of gamers."



I think we should take Iraq and Iran and combine them into one country. Call it Irate. All the pissed-off people can live in one place and just get it over with.
-Denis Leary

[DEFCON Clown]

We've been playing a heroic game for a while and one PC, Richter, has been getting a little more violent then nesecery. So we had an ingame talk with him and he promised he'd tone it down.

So later after a fight we are interrogating the two guys we captured. The rest of us blow our interrogation rolls and even fail to effect the guy with a presence attack! Richter gets back from making a phone call to a contact of his and is told the situation with the prisoner.

Both prisoners by this time are very smug and not at all worried. Richter walks over to the guy we were interogatting and pulls out his MAC 10. He asks the guy a question and just gets insulted.

So Richter's player says he's going to shoot him once in the leg.
GM: Okay you shoot him in the leg and he starts screaming.
Richter: Don't I have to roll to hit?
GM: Not unless you really want to.
Richter: I'll roll'em.

He precedes to roll a 4. He shoots the guy 5 TIMES in the LEG!

Gordon: Holy ****! What the hell would you have done to him when you were violent?!

[Minotaur King]

This just shows how stupid gamers are some days.
3rd edition D&D, after a major battle, some players get enough xp to level!!(yay)

Jason:Hey, what level do you have to be to be 10th?
Mike:10th....
Jason:ha nono I meant what LEVEL do you have to be to be 10th
Mike:......10th!

This is jason, the dork of the group (we are all dorks but, you know what I mean)

He wants to be an actor one day.

In the same session as the above conversation, Jason is trying to befriend a very powerfull lord, after finding the lord at the stables (its a jousting contest fair)

Jason:So.....buying a horse?
GM:.........*throws reigns to jason*....make sure he is fed boy!

[AdamLeisemann]

Long ago, on Furcadia, I was with a couple of friends. My character was a vulpine ghost, and I was hanging out with Jezebel (a vulpine-dragon-succubus) and Silver (a dragon).

One of us took a picture of the other two and Jeze and Silver were debating who got to sell the picture.

Then I said "I'm pretty sure the money for it will go to all involved parties."

Then Jeze said, "But we never have any panties."

There was a long pause. Then I said "Okay. We didn't need to know that."

The fun of typos.

[radioKAOS]

Again, these are all out of game, but they do reference gaming from my loving wife. I wasn't going to put them, but today's I thought everyone would enjoy.

"All I hear is 'blah, blah, blah, stormtrooper. Blah, blah, blah, the force.' I don't know what you're talking about."

"Dear, unless I specifically ask you a question about your game, I don't want you to tell me about it."

And today's: "Come over here and

watch this

about widows of gamers."



I think we should take Iraq and Iran and combine them into one country. Call it Irate. All the pissed-off people can live in one place and just get it over with.
-Denis Leary

You have given out too much Reputation in the last 24 hours, try again later.

[Beetle]

From Tuesday's session:

"We only kill carbon-based lifeforms."

(of course, in Firefly all lifeforms are carbon-based...)

[bigdamnhero]

From Tuesday's session:

"We only kill carbon-based lifeforms."

(of course, in Firefly all lifeforms are carbon-based...)

So I'm guessing that particular Psych Lim isn't worth too many points?

[CrosshairCollie]

D&D game ... the party has been told to retrieve a stolen mask from some orcs (we suspect, but don't know for certain, that the mask is magical).

Half-Orc Druid: "Why would the orcs want with a mask?"
Me: "Look in the mirror, then ask that question again."

[James Gillen]

Tonight we started Don's low-powered supernatural HERO game.
Gary's character (an Occult Investigator who gets his powers from being fused with a demon) spotted someone breaking into a Boston antiquties museum after hours. The culprits looked strangely like Orcish warriors in ancient garb.
Gary sneaked up on one of them and used the out-of-combat Surprise modifiers to do a Called Shot to the guy's Vitals, the intent being to literally rip out his spine. Even though he had Chainmail armor, the target still took enough BODY to die, and he basically got his spine pulled out via his rectum.

Demon-Gary also has the Enraged in combat Disadvantage, and rolled for that every Phase; on Phase 9 he announced "My character goes Enraged this Phase."

I said, "Because he was so restrained up to this point."

JG

[input.jack]

Even though he had Chainmail armor, the target still took enough BODY to die, and he basically got his spine pulled out via his rectum....

Whatever happened to "Boo!" ??