Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

[Drhoz]

I was taking it more to mean that flashing one's boobs at someone was the universal language for 'Pay attention to me'.

exactly

[Cenobite]

“You know, I’ve never heard the word 'dissect' used in context of a piece of paper before”

[AliceTheOwl]

We played a Fantasy Hero game at Dragon*Con, run by Josh and attended by me, my college roommate, and Thag13 and his gaming group. We were all quite punchy and sleep-deprived, and so, of course, it was hilarious. None of our characters had names; we just went by our character professions.

Here are the lines I remembered to write down:

The Hero: "But you have to remember, for the rest of the game, that I have seen you naked."

GM: "Have you looked at your disadvantages sheet? You're doing a good job of playing them, anyway."
The Priest (OOC, after looking at his sheet): "Oh, good."

In combat, The Dwarf runs in for an ambush on several sleeping bad guys, and cuts the ropes for the tents. Once the men are tangled in their tents, he declares, "Those twelve are covered."

A major feature of the game is that the hero was supposed to be a Mary Sue, so Josh spent some time describing how they really like her . . . eyes. Yeah, her eyes.

So the party is discussing plans, and someone (I forget who) says, "Well, we gotta keep Captain Cleavage here happy."

(They called her that for the rest of the game.)

Later, still discussing plans, The Dwarf says, "I don't care HOW nice her cleavage is." He pauses, then reassures her, "It is really nice, though."

Later, we're fighting a giant, and my character (elven archer) makes a called shot to the vitals, and deals enough damage to separate that part from the rest of the giant. At the (mostly-male) table, I get eyed, then the guy playing the priest asks, cautiously, "Is that a racial ability?"

And even later, the giant, for destroying a church, is smushed by one of the Seraphim in this fantasy world, and is lying in, basically, a puddle on the ground. The Priest walks up to the puddle, points, and declares, "Not so tall NOW, are you?"

There were also several readings from The Book of the Creator, but I was always laughing too hard to write them down.

Overall, it was a LOT of fun, and absolutely hilarious. I'll post more as I remember them. ^ v ^

[CrosshairCollie]

Later, we're fighting a giant, and my character (elven archer) makes a called shot to the vitals, and deals enough damage to separate that part from the rest of the giant. At the (mostly-male) table, I get eyed, then the guy playing the priest asks, cautiously, "Is that a racial ability?"

"That's an Elven Bris."

[DEFCON Clown]

In our Sci-Fi game I play a robot who is based off of HK-47 from Knights Of The Old Republic. I fill the combat expert role.

Anyways we found a ship adrift in space the people on it where alive but there engines had been destroyed when they fought off a pirate attack. The pirate group was one we had been up against before so we helped the stranded ship. We got them to a hidden place and gave them what they would need to fix their engines. Then we went back to where we found them to salvage what we could from the wrecked pirate ship.

Long story short we get captured. We get taken to Captain Vess and he starts into a long speech about how he should kill us now for helping his enemies and how he still owes us for what we did to him last time. Then he finishes by saying if we tell him where the other ship is he'll let us go and call it even and forgive us for defying him. The he was waiting expectently for our answer.

Me: I'm sorry, I turned off my audio receptors, were you saying something?

[prodigyduck]

Monday night's StarHERO game. The PCs have taken out a 1000' Vallenthori WarEagle with their 400' pocket Battleship in less than one Turn.

Captain Murdoch: "Why is it all other alien governments think that I'm negotiating from a possition of weakness?"

[Cancer]

"Is running away a combat manuver?"

[bigdamnhero]

The first of the quotes from Tacticon last weekend; this first batch from a Champions game I ran:

Foxbat has just "conquered" Jackson Hole, Wyoming, and makes a statement to the press:
“I am Foxbat. Or as my loyal subjects know me: El Honcho Supremo. Today my forces have liberated - Yes! I say liberated! - this town from the oppressive, uncaring capitalist running-dog losers, whose heel they have suffered for far too long. Under. Under whose heel... never mind. I hereby declare this entire valley the free and independent Peoples' Republic of Foxbatistan! (Foxbat Fan Club members receive 2-for-1 margaritas at all participating Foxbatistan establishments!) We wish only to co-exist peacefully with our fellow sovereign and independent nations. But if any power should cast an eye on violating that sovereignness, they’ll find we are prepared to defend the borders of Foxbatistan with Deadly Force! I. Am. Foxbat! Look on my works, ye mighty… and Despair! Bwah-ha-ha-haaaa!” <aside to the reporter, not realizing the camera is still on> “How was that? Good? What about the laugh, not too over-the-top? Cause I could…”
Cut back to the network anchors trying to keep a straight face.

The hero’s superplane approaches Jackson Hole, when they are challenged by “Foxbatistan Air Traffic Control” and ordered to state their business.
Magnetica: “We’re here to try your new Foxbatburger.”
Foxbatistan ATC: “You’ve already heard about the Foxbatburgers? Wow, word travels fast.”

GM: “…and they’re already selling “I was conquered by Foxbat and all I got was this lousy T-Shirt” shirts.”
Players: [in unison] "I buy one!"
One Player: “Do they have hats?”
GM: “Sorry, the hats won’t be in until tomorrow – they have to send those out.”

Illuminatus gets tired of Foxbat’s posturing, and hits him with an Entangle in mid-speech.
Foxbat: “Hey, I was monologuing here!”

Force Majeure (a French brick) deafens a villain with his Thunder Clap: “Ah, I gave you zee clap, yes?”

Force Majeure rationalizes a poor attack roll: “She’s jumping up and down in a nightie – I’m distracted!”

No explanation necessary: “It’s not polite to PRE Attack the GM…”

A supervillain wannbe named Gell-O enters the fray: “There’s always room for Gell-O!”
(Note: I didn’t actually have a catch-phrase ready for this guy; one of the players suggested it.)

Later, Foxbat has joined forces with the heroes to help defeat The Warlord. The Warlord gets knocked back across the room, into Foxbat, then into a wall. The Warlord winds up embedded halfway into the wall, with Foxbat pinned behind him – amazingly, both are still conscious.
Foxbat: [muffled] “Ha! I can’t miss from here!” <Bang!> “Ow.”

Magnetica has really been playing up her Rivalry with Pebbles, at one point calling her a Skank (maybe out of character, maybe not). Later, Pebbles gets Mind Controlled…
Pebbles: “Skank, huh?”
Magnetica: “Uh oh.”
At which point Pebbles nails Magnetica with Rapid Autofire, hitting her 8 times for 8d6 each and blasting her into unconsciousness.

And the one that got the most laughter -- Illuminatus, a mystic whose Disads include Unfamiliar With Non-Mystic Culture, overhears a super-hacker talking about penetrating a system's firewalls.
Illuminatus: “I know not of these Walls Of Fire of which they speak, but…”

[James Gillen]

"So Steve, what is the difference between stalking and skulking?"
"I always thought that skulking was just stalking while hunched over."

[CrosshairCollie]

"We can't just row the boat out into the middle of the ocean, dive, and expect it to be there when we get back. We need an anchor."
"We have an elf in full plate, that should cover it."
---------------------------------------------------
"The best thing about using M&Ms as tokens for enemy monsters is eating them when you kill them."
---------------------------------------------------
"You know, I have the manners of a weasel, and even I think that's rude."
---------------------------------------------------

[bigdamnhero]

More Tacticon Quotes, this time from my Friends 1934 Pulp Hero game, which uses Pulparized versions of the six Friends sitcom characters as PCs:

Chandler makes a humor PRE Attack on a Brownshirt:
Chandler: “So Hitler…what’s up with that mustache anyway?”
<rolls all 5s and 6s, scoring EGO+20>
Brownshirt: “Now that you mention it, it is kinda silly looking isn't it?”

Another Brownshirt, another PRE Attack, basically the same result:
Chandler: “So why are you called Nazis anyway? If it’s National Socialism, shouldn’t you be Nazos?”

The PCs have been caught in a death trap by the villainous Soup Nazi.* Hot soup is pouring into the room they’re trapped in. I go around the table asking everyone what they’re doing, and get five variations on “I check the walls/floor/ceiling/etc for some way out.” Then I get to Joey…
Joey: “I’m going to see if I can eat the soup faster than it’s entering the room.”

Ross: “Can I send Marcel (the Capuchin monkey) to open the grate?”
GM: “Make your Animal Handler Roll.” <the player blows his roll> “OK, Marcel is now humping the grate…”

Joey: “Why would Gazpacho soup be cold?”
<laughter around the table at what we all assumed to be in-character roleplaying>
Joey’s player: (OOC) “No, seriously…”

Climbing a rope, Ross fails his Climbing roll:
Ross: “I guess I was distracted by something.”
Other player: Well, Rachel was on the rope right above you. In a dress…”

After the Soup Nazi finally falls:
All players: <in unison> “No Soup For You!!!”

The heroes contact an inventor who reportedly sold some gadgets to the Brownshirts, and try to find out what the devices were:
Inventor: “Oh, I really can’t tell you that. Mad Scientist–Client privilege, you understand. Besides, they made me sign this non-disclosure form…”

Later, the inventor agrees to loan them some mini-grenades: a mix of explosive, sleep gas, smoke, etc. The players all shove one of each type in their pockets, and go. Later, they get ready to throw some:
Chandler: (OOC) “How do we know which one is which?”
GM: “Did anyone label them?”
Monica: (OOC) “Uh oh.”
GM: “Give me an INT Roll.”
Joey: (OOC) "UH OH!”

And finally, one I didn’t originate but finally got to use:
GM: “They’re speaking Nazi; it’s a lot like German, only angrier.”


* Yes, I should be ashamed. No, I’m not.

[teh bunneh]

Force Majeure rationalizes a poor attack roll: “She’s jumping up and down in a nightie – I’m distracted!”

Was this cute blonde?

No explanation necessary: “It’s not polite to PRE Attack the GM…”

Was this the cute blonde?

Magnetica has really been playing up her Rivalry with Pebbles, at one point calling her a Skank (maybe out of character, maybe not). Later, Pebbles gets Mind Controlled…

Who is Pebbles? She wasn't in the last game I played...

(I do remember Magnetica, though. Oh yes, I remember Magnetica well...)

And the one that got the most laughter -- Illuminatus, a mystic whose Disads include Unfamiliar With Non-Mystic Culture, overhears a super-hacker talking about penetrating a system's firewalls.
Illuminatus: “I know not of these Walls Of Fire of which they speak, but…”

Did he have <waves hands menacingly> Dark Sorcerous Powers?

[bigdamnhero]

Was this cute blonde?

Actually no. It was one of Foxbat's minions called Knighty Nightie. a cute girl wearing a teddy, carrying a big*** sword. She was jumping up and down because Magnetica had TK'd her sword out of her hand and was playing keep-away with it. (What, you expected seriousness and decorum? This was a Foxbat scenario. )

Was this the cute blonde?

Nah, I don't complain when she PRE Attacks me.

Who is Pebbles? She wasn't in the last game I played...

Pebbles. I added her after GenghisCon in case I needed a seventh PC.

(I do remember Magnetica, though. Oh yes, I remember Magnetica well...)

But do you remember anything about the character, or just the player?

Did he have <waves hands menacingly> Dark Sorcerous Powers?

So far I've had three different players run Illuminatus, and they've all played him pretty close to your original "vision."

[Note to others wondering about the in-jokes: Bill played Illuminatus the first time I ran a game with these characters. Magnetica was played by a great roleplayer who also happens to be a particularly attractive blonde girl.]

[Kirby]

Chandler: “So why are you called Nazis anyway? If it’s National Socialism, shouldn’t you be Nazos?”

As an aside, I know the reason for this (and it's probably not what you're thinking), if anyone cares to know.

Joey: “I’m going to see if I can eat the soup faster than it’s entering the room.”

Actually, this one is gooed enough it could have stood alone without an explanation.

[Susano]

As an aside, I know the reason for this (and it's probably not what you're thinking), if anyone cares to know.

Because it's not spelled "National Socialism" in German?