Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

[Lightray]

I've got two from our decades-ago Champions games in high school -- they've become so infamous that our current group knows 'em.


First, our team was fighting Mechanon, who knew all of our weaknesses since he used to be our team's AI. Mechanon was holding a hostage to shield himself from my (Lightray's) light blasts. Solar Sailor (= Silver Surfer clone) was hovering overhead.

Mechanon: I know you are too weak to risk an insignificant organic like this woman!
GM: You can't hit Mechanon without risking a hit on the hostage.
me: Hey! Isn't Solar Sailor reflective?
SS: What?
GM: Yes, yes he is...
me: I bounce my light blast off of Solar Sailor to hit Mechanon!
GM: Okay. Roll.
SS: Hey!
(I blast Mechanon)
Mechanon: (fails PER roll. blasts SS)
SS: Hey!

From then on, I bounced my energy blast off of Solar Sailor at every opportunity -- "I bounce my light blast off of Solar Sailor!" became Lightray's signature quote, much to SS's dismay.



Second, when I was starting up my own campaign in the same shared world. The heroes had not met, but suspected something was going to happen at the charity ball being held. Unbeknownst to the players, two of them had asked each other to the ball -- in their secret IDs.

GM (me): (description of villains appearing and unleashing mayhem).
Witch: I duck under the table and Instant Change!
Enforcer: I duck under the table and Instant Change!
GM: You each duck under the table. Your date is under there, too, looking at you oddly.
E: Um, I lost my contact!
W: I dropped my napkin!
(they realize who their date of the night actually is)
GM: (description of more mayhem and the other superheroes showing up)
W: Oh, heck. I'm a superhero, okay?
E: Uh, yeah, me too.

To this day, everyone wants to duck under tables to Instant Change -- it's our version of Superman's phone booth. When evil beckons it's "I duck under the table and change!"

(BTW, Enforcer and Witch never did live that incident down; for the rest of the campaign they were teased by their team. they were even a frequent in-joke of the other campaigns in that shared world. I was so proud. )

[Agent333]

I was GMing a Vampire game, my player (Charles, Toreador) and his ghoul follower were ambushed by a Sabbat gang and their pet war-ghoul. The War-ghoul had just flipped Charles' car and was sweeping it back and forth, pummeling the parked car Charles and his ghoul were hiding behind. The Sabbat gang leader watching the carnage and full of bravado yelled out, "My pet can do that all night, joker!"

Feigning confidence, Charles handed his ghoul his .50 Desert Eagle and said, "Drop him". His ghoul stood up from behind the car and fired at the war-ghoul. The roll to hit was a three (max damage) and so was the hit location roll. The war-ghoul's head exploded and his 600 lbs fame slumped to the street.

Charles lept up from behind the cover of the car, pointed at his own ghoul and yelled, "He can do that all night too!"

[Klytus]

Taking Docman's lead, there's another good quote from that very same V:tM campaign.

Drake is trying to teach his new Childe (i.e. someone recently turned into a vampire) Lynn the virtues of the Discipline of Fortitude (i.e. supernatural toughness). As Geofry (the afformentioned English Lunatic) is a big, strong fellow, Drake thinks a simple demonstration would best illustrate things.

D: Geofry, hit me.
G: Sir?
D: I said hit me! Right in the jaw. As hard as you can.

Now Geofry regarded Drake as "The General" and had great respect for him besides, so he was very reluctant to give his Commanding Officer anything resembling a real punch. Drake sensed that some motivation was in order. This was when the line was uttered that has oft been quoted in many of our other games:

D: Put your back into it, you pansy!

THAT did the trick. Of course, it was only made more impressive by the fact that Geofry botched his damage roll. End result, Drake doesn't even flinch as Geofry breaks his hand on Drake's jaw, leaving the new Childe very impressed with her Sire and thinking that learning Fortitude would be a wise thing to do.

[Klytus]

And since I don't think Jehan's player posts on this board, I'll tell the story of his unfortunate quote in a D&D game.

Jehan, a wizard, is quite happy and pleased with the Staff of Fire he's recently acquired. So at the start of one adventure, when everyone was just sitting and chilling out, folks are telling me (the DM) what the characters are doing. As Jehan's player seems a bit pre-occupied, I chime in helpfully, "All the while, Jehan sits back and polishes his staff." The others chuckled at this as the player sort of snapped to and said, in all seriousness, "Are you kidding? It might go off!"

Everyone lost it, and it took a moment for Jehan to realize exactly what he had just said. The looks of confusion, sudden realization and total embarassment on his face were priceless.

[Vondy]

I'm running a street level game set in the Bay Area right now:

One of the heroes is a big strong guy (25ST) in a red bull costume with big horns. His moniker is the bull.

This week he charged a badguy and hit him so hard that he carried him out onto a balcony and sent him over the edge.

Midnight, one of the other heroes, was outside, saw this and said:

"huh! red bull gives you wings"

[RDU Neil]

Originally posted by Nuadha
I'm shocked you didn't mention this one, Neil:

Quantum Ghost (trying to break up a fight between two teammates): "How much C-4 can I safely use on them?"

Oh yeah. Can't believe I forgot that one.

And the quote was...

... Tim to me (GM)... "So... how much C-4 CAN I safely use on my friends?"


Only in a superhero game.

[Killer Shrike]

Forgot about this one. In yesterdays session the PCs had a small press conference, thier first, and the media asks Gravitic, the Grandmaster of Graviolis what the source of his superhuman powers are.

In his typical 4-color voice, Gravitic answers,

<h1>"Why, my super HUMANITY, of course!"</h1>

[Killer Shrike]

The same character is an actor in bad B-Movies and TV shows in the superhero genre in his civilian ID, a career he started before his powers catalyzed.

Hes got this big 4 color Minuteman! voice, all the time, from years of voice acting, and he's also NOT. TO. BRIGHT.

He's also somehting of a superhero buff, and likes to rattle of obscure trivia apropos of nothing.



In a recent session his agent called him with a new movie deal, Super Weapon V, wherein he would play the main Villain. One catch, Principal Photography is in NYC, but there are 2 weeks of filming scheduled in Zimbabwe.

Gravitic (in his civie ID): "Hmm. I prefer to play the Hero. Im the heroic type, you know!"

Agent: Look, the Academy is favoring leading bad guys lately. Look at Denzel; does a bad guy, gets Best Actor. Whaddayagonnado?

G: Hmmmm. Good point. An Oscar would look good on my mantle. Ill do it!.....but no Zimbabwe. Ill do NYC, but no Africa!

Agent: You gotta do the location shoot. Thats the thing these days. If it aint filmed in Prague, New Zealand, or somewhere near Tunisia, it aint in!

G: NO AFRICA!

Agent: Aw come on, yer killin me here; I coulda called anybody who would die for this role, and who do I call first but you?

G: <h2>"Look, man, I was the PATRIOT MISSILE! And if they want the PATRIOT MISSILE, then NO Zimbabwe! The PATRIOT MISSILE does not do deserted wastelands! You tell them that! Now good bye." --CLIK</h2>

[Enforcer84]

"Look ma'am, I'm sorry you lost your cat in the combat, but I don't see how I am responsible."

"Mittens was in the Car you through at that metallic moron, you ninny!"

"Oh. I'll buy you a new cat."

[Susano]

Originally posted by MechaGM
Matt: okay, I can polymorph myself into any monster I have seen, right?
Sam (DM): Right...
Matt: Alright, I'll turn into an invisible stalker and slink away.
Me: Matt... have you ever *seen* an invisible stalker?
Matt: Err....

The Warner Bros version:

"You're not a Labrador Retreiver."
"Yes I am. Show me a Labrador and I'll retreive it."
"There's no such thing!"
"Oh yeah? Have you ever seen a Labrador?"
"Uhm... no."
"Than shaddup."

[Susano]

For a while I was running an anime-inspired ghost-hunters game (and hope to restart it real-soon-now![tm]). Think HELLBOY mixed with HELLSING.

Anyway, the cast was a mixed bag of characters, including Lin Foo Wong the ghost, Mack Williams ex-NYPD, Yuki Hari the ghost-hunter, and Alexander Maxamillian the sorcerer.

Some lines I noted down as amusing:

Lin Foo Wong: "I'm glad I'm not a superstitious ghost."

Yuki's player, responding to unwanted comments: "Shut up! I'm being cinematic!"

Uncredited (but about a villian I think...): "Special, as in 'mommy thinks I'm special'."

Agent Thompson [indicating blue-skinned and white-haired Lin]: "Who is she?"
Mack: "One of our agents."
Agent Thompson: "*What* is she?"
Belinda: "And acrobat from Peking."

Mack also made me break up by telling a talking corpse: "You're dead! What do you need treasure for?" Which just so happened to be virtually Hellboy's same exact line in the HELLBOY story I swiped the plot from. He got +1 EXP for that.

[CrosshairCollie]

Ah, that one reminds me ... in mid-battle, I'm playing this character here (Crosshair Collie, she of many guns) and my teammate who is a mutant brick. We're fighting some Genocide grunts, and through more luck than skill, we're winning, though right before this line, an agent landed a solid hit on the brick, who had been arrogantly spouting off about himself for a good solid Turn.

Agent: "Hah! Not so special NOW, are you?"
Brick: "Shows what you know, I *am* special!"
Me: "Yeah, like the Olympics."

I've used this line RL. Even got my mother-in-law to crack a smile at it.

[Bud Gray]

I did a revamp of Los Asesinoes (dropped a couple members, added a couple new ones, and rewrote a couple) and used them a henchmen to the new Professor Muerte. For a couple weeks I had Stalker seduce the PC, Diva. After they had, ahem, consummated the relationship, he invited to a big party full of rich people, where stalker and his team promptly took everyone hostage as a distraction to Professor Muerte's real plan. Stalker offered to make Diva a vampire and live with him forever. She refused and was taken captive. When the rest of the team showed up and freed her, the big fight began. The french warewolf, Loupe Garou, jumped Horus, the armored hero, and brought him to the ground, but before he could rip his armor open, Horus let loose with his helmet's laser (RKA), killing the warewolf outright, promting this exchange:

GM (me): "You now have a dead werewolf on top of you."
Xander (team mentalist): "Wouldn't he revert back to his true form when he died?"
GM (me): "You're right." (to Horus) "You now have a naked dead man on top of you." (turning to Diva's player) "I guess your character would know what that's like."

She promtly jumped up and chased me around the room with a foam LARP sword.

[Bud Gray]

Here's another.
I was running a fantasy hero game a while back. The heroes had found an evil cult that had been kidnapping the locals for sacrifices. Thae PCs made their way to the main chamber where the cult was about to start a big cerimony. Of course, a fight ensued. While the priest held off the undead, the wizard decided to start tossing molotov cocktails down the hole that the giant leeches (that the cult fed captives to) came out of. This caused the complex to catch fire. Meanwhile, the knight had come accross an evil knight and the two were having an honor duel. Right in the escape path. As the rest of the group came rushing up, trying to escape the flames, the dwarf's player remarked:
"Will you just take him as a disadvantage so we can go!"

[Bud Gray]

Okay, one more.
I had unleashed my big, unstopable, brick, Negaton, on the heroes. While the rest of the team was assembling to help stop him, the team's speedster, Nomad, was faced with the task of keeping the beast busy. He made constant hit and run attacks against Negaton with little effect other than to make him mad. And at the end of every passing strike Nomad would taunt Negaton to keep him focued on him rather than innocent bystander.

Nomad: "Come on, Grape Ape, try and catch me!"
Negaton growls and grabs a nearby pickup truck.
Nomad: "Nonononono, don't do that, I'm coming back!"

I still missed the bugger. But I got me revenge with Baron Frost and his damage shield.