Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

[Blue]

Funniest line of the week did not happen during the game but was relayed to us at the game.

The GM is a teacher in a public school. This week his students were complaining about how much homework he gives out, prompting this line which reminds us of his games...

"Keep crying. Your tears are like candy to me!"

[Major Tom]

Today's 3.5 game (I'm roleplaying again! Glee!):

"Everybody wants to touch the Minotaur's lance!"

One of the players, for reasons unknown even to himself, wrote "Power Elf" on his elven druid's character sheet. We have, naturally, been taking the micky ever since. Today, when he was shapeshifting into various beasties:

"He's not a Power Elf! He's a transformer!"
"Transformers! Druids in disguise!"
"No wait, he's Manimal! Elfimal!" (that was mine, sorry)

The barbarian also chose this session to tell one of the other characters (there's eleven of us, and I can't for the life of me remember what class he is) that he had eaten this guy's pet dog, which had sadly been on the wrong end of a lightning bolt thrown by our sorceress. We were rolling about over this (we were, alas, less than sympathetic) for about five minutes, but I can't seem to condense it into a quote...

Well, if nothing else, the barbarian at least got a decent hot dog out of the
situation...



Major Tom
16 more to go...

[Lonewalker]

I have here some quotes from the first session of teh Bunneh's new steampunk game set in The Kandris Seal world (mentioned earlier by QuerySphinx).

The basic premise is that the characters are all members of the Dragon Hunters, a covert group devoted to protecting the world from supernatural threats. The PCs include:

Savannah Leblanc (played by BunnySue - teh Bunneh's wife) - Beautiful shootist from Texas with a knack for trouble and action.
Morden Yazimoff (played by our friend Ron) - Jewish geomancer and student of the occult.
ADEN (played by our friend Ben) - Artificial clockwork man who serves Master Yazimoff with a upper crust demeanor.
Alicia Keen (played by QuerySphinx) - Vertically challenged Italian mystic and seer with an air of mystery.
Thackary Hartwell (played by yours truly) - Young British Savant (made scientist) specializing in weaponry and explosives.

We open with a mission involving the investigation of a massive cross-country race through England that may have nefarious purposes...

---

The GM describes the Dragon Hunters organization...
GM: The Dragon Hunters are a group dedicated to the investigation and extermination of many paranormal threats...
Thackary (OOC): So...we're professional paranormal investigations and eliminations?
GM: Well, yeah.
Thackary (OOC): The franchise rights along will make us rich beyond our wildest dreams...

GM draws the route of a race across England, forming a very obvious pentagram shape...
Thackary: There's...some sort of...pattern here...wait, don't tell me...

The team's operations chief, Master Pasquale, details some of the mission goals...
Pasquale (NPC): We also need for you to make sure that none of the competitors complete the race.
Thackary: That's...a very open-ended directive, sir.

Savannah asks a question about the pentagram...
Savannah: So how do we know if this is good juju or bad mojo?
Pasquale (NPC): If it wasn't of nefarious bent, our contacts would have informed us.
ADEN: Did you...just use the logic of "we would know if it was good?"
Pasquale (NPC): <pause> ... Yes.

After a brief but inevitable digression...
Thackary (NPC): It's a Victorian setting - of course there's going to be Gilbert & Sullivan sing-a-longs!

The two wizards of the party discuss tactical options...
Alicia: Subtle we can arrange.
Morden: Yes, no one will notice those full eclipses sneaking up on them.

More tactical talk - much to Savannah's exasperation...
Alicia: So we should go gather some information.
Savannah: Boring!
Morden: It's a British race - we can leave it to the Brits. I'll be in the Turkish baths.
Savannah: Now that idea I like!

Words of wisdom...
Savannah: You never want two Savants in the same room together.

The artificial ADEN explains his partnership with Morden...
ADEN: Our relationship is very symbionic. And he has my bill of sale.
Thackary: It doesn't get more symbionic than that.

As the team breaks off to deal with individual tasks in the plan...
ADEN (OOC): I think we've set a new record. We've been playing for only an hour and we've already split the party - across the country!

An aside comment to the newcomer to the gaming group...
ADEN (OOC): You'll find that we use continuous movie references and quotations - even more than other gaming groups.

Savannah's player mentions how attractive the Texan is compared to mainstream population...
ADEN (OOC): Comeliness 18? I'm glad I'm a robot.
Thackary (OOC): At a Comeliness 18, even a robot turns its head.
ADEN (OOC): Nice chassis!

During info-gathering at the local newspaper, a young reporter tries to impress Miss Keen...
Junior Reporter (NPC): See? I've got my own desk - you have to be very important to have your own desk.
Alicia: Yes, I'm sure you two will be very happy together.

Thackary, in the guise of a reporter, steps into a workshop and runs into a massive and obviously dim-witted man...
Thackary: Alistaire Hart from the London Times. I was wondering if I could get a few words.
Alicia (OOC): He only knows a few words!

A manservant interrupts Thackary while the Savant is in his workshop - this is a typical Savant response...
Jeeves (NPC): Sir, pardon me, but there is a telegraph...
Thackary: Not now, you fool! Can't you see I'm in the middle of... <pause> ...Yes, Jeeves, what can I do for you?

The put-upon manservant continues to try to assist young Thackary in teh contruction of a racing vehicle...
Jeeves (NPC): Shall I continue to collect cats for you, sir?
Thackary: Yes - but remember that I require a minimum of twenty five point two five felines!
Jeeves (NPC): But how shall I get...er, yes, very good, sir.

During a telephone conversation...
Alicia: Can you pass a message on to our philosopher type?
ADEN: Do you mean Master Yazimoff or Master Hartwell.
Alicia: Thackary is not a philosopher - he's an obsessive-compulsive.

Random comment...
ADEN: I believe what we have here is moral wiggle-room.

Thackary recruits some help with his new Savant vehicle...
Thackary: Miss Lablanc, how are you with cats?
Savannah: Why?
Thackary: I need an enginner.

---

That's what I have for now. I'll post more as the campaign continues!

Enjoy!
- Lonewalker

[Drhoz]

No Gnoll & Void this week - the evening game was derailed by a late start, and an early finish. Vitus will just have to decide next fortnight whether his teammates and Earth are worth saving.

In the City On The Edge game, the team continue the cross-dimensional pursuit of the Black Paladin and Talisman. Most recently from a Late Stone Age Greece, to a modern and rainy industrial town.

Zero : "But have they invented hats? Are we still in the Hatless Continuum?"

The local police are wearing power-armour.

Zero : "What kind of criminals need cops armoured like that?
Terminus : "The kind of criminals from my world"
Zero : "Oh, you know these guys?"
Terminus : "No, but I like their style."

They also shoot first and ask questions later when it comes to mentalists who can get through their shields.

Terminus, over the mind link : "Quick, play dead!"
Zero : "Ahhh! Don't shoot! *bang bang bang* falls over, spreading puddle ... Although that last one would have happened anyway."

Trawler, 12-ft tall, and about as wide : "I want to know what laws I might be violating"
Zero : "Well, they won't let you in the ball-pit at IKEA"

Local super-cop : "I assume she has an actual name?"
Zero : "Talisman, but if you call her 'the skank' everybody will know who you're talking about."

GM : "You have to worry about any setting where magic is real because it means Crowley wasn't just a wanker."

My wife's Smut Field proves it has the Sticky advantage, because our GM tried to explain how precognitive visions lead Swordbearers to their mystic inheritance, and it came out like this.

GM : "Most individuals start dreaming about their weapon when they hit puberty."

The supercops in the current dimension have a bunch of different departments - we get them confused.

GM : "You mean Section Seven, the mages. There is no Section Eight."
Zero : "Section Eight is what they'll get after a week of working with us."

[BoloOfEarth]

Only quote I'm reporting from last night's Champions game:

GM (me): As soon as you guys started talking about flaming bags of poo, I decided I'm not saving any quotes tonight.

[Major Tom]

I have here some quotes from the first session of teh Bunneh's new steampunk game set in The Kandris Seal world (mentioned earlier by QuerySphinx).

The basic premise is that the characters are all members of the Dragon Hunters, a covert group devoted to protecting the world from supernatural threats. The PCs include:

Savannah Leblanc (played by BunnySue - teh Bunneh's wife) - Beautiful shootist from Texas with a knack for trouble and action.
Morden Yazimoff (played by our friend Ron) - Jewish geomancer and student of the occult.
ADEN (played by our friend Ben) - Artificial clockwork man who serves Master Yazimoff with a upper crust demeanor.
Alicia Keen (played by QuerySphinx) - Vertically challenged Italian mystic and seer with an air of mystery.
Thackary Hartwell (played by yours truly) - Young British Savant (made scientist) specializing in weaponry and explosives.

We open with a mission involving the investigation of a massive cross-country race through England that may have nefarious purposes...

---

The GM describes the Dragon Hunters organization...
GM: The Dragon Hunters are a group dedicated to the investigation and extermination of many paranormal threats...
Thackary (OOC): So...we're professional paranormal investigations and eliminations?
GM: Well, yeah.
Thackary (OOC): The franchise rights along will make us rich beyond our wildest dreams...

GM draws the route of a race across England, forming a very obvious pentagram shape...
Thackary: There's...some sort of...pattern here...wait, don't tell me...

The team's operations chief, Master Pasquale, details some of the mission goals...
Pasquale (NPC): We also need for you to make sure that none of the competitors complete the race.
Thackary: That's...a very open-ended directive, sir.

Savannah asks a question about the pentagram...
Savannah: So how do we know if this is good juju or bad mojo?
Pasquale (NPC): If it wasn't of nefarious bent, our contacts would have informed us.
ADEN: Did you...just use the logic of "we would know if it was good?"
Pasquale (NPC): <pause> ... Yes.

After a brief but inevitable digression...
Thackary (NPC): It's a Victorian setting - of course there's going to be Gilbert & Sullivan sing-a-longs!

The two wizards of the party discuss tactical options...
Alicia: Subtle we can arrange.
Morden: Yes, no one will notice those full eclipses sneaking up on them.

More tactical talk - much to Savannah's exasperation...
Alicia: So we should go gather some information.
Savannah: Boring!
Morden: It's a British race - we can leave it to the Brits. I'll be in the Turkish baths.
Savannah: Now that idea I like!

Words of wisdom...
Savannah: You never want two Savants in the same room together.

The artificial ADEN explains his partnership with Morden...
ADEN: Our relationship is very symbionic. And he has my bill of sale.
Thackary: It doesn't get more symbionic than that.

As the team breaks off to deal with individual tasks in the plan...
ADEN (OOC): I think we've set a new record. We've been playing for only an hour and we've already split the party - across the country!

An aside comment to the newcomer to the gaming group...
ADEN (OOC): You'll find that we use continuous movie references and quotations - even more than other gaming groups.

Savannah's player mentions how attractive the Texan is compared to mainstream population...
ADEN (OOC): Comeliness 18? I'm glad I'm a robot.
Thackary (OOC): At a Comeliness 18, even a robot turns its head.
ADEN (OOC): Nice chassis!

During info-gathering at the local newspaper, a young reporter tries to impress Miss Keen...
Junior Reporter (NPC): See? I've got my own desk - you have to be very important to have your own desk.
Alicia: Yes, I'm sure you two will be very happy together.

Thackary, in the guise of a reporter, steps into a workshop and runs into a massive and obviously dim-witted man...
Thackary: Alistaire Hart from the London Times. I was wondering if I could get a few words.
Alicia (OOC): He only knows a few words!

A manservant interrupts Thackary while the Savant is in his workshop - this is a typical Savant response...
Jeeves (NPC): Sir, pardon me, but there is a telegraph...
Thackary: Not now, you fool! Can't you see I'm in the middle of... <pause> ...Yes, Jeeves, what can I do for you?

The put-upon manservant continues to try to assist young Thackary in teh contruction of a racing vehicle...
Jeeves (NPC): Shall I continue to collect cats for you, sir?
Thackary: Yes - but remember that I require a minimum of twenty five point two five felines!
Jeeves (NPC): But how shall I get...er, yes, very good, sir.

During a telephone conversation...
Alicia: Can you pass a message on to our philosopher type?
ADEN: Do you mean Master Yazimoff or Master Hartwell.
Alicia: Thackary is not a philosopher - he's an obsessive-compulsive.

Random comment...
ADEN: I believe what we have here is moral wiggle-room.

Thackary recruits some help with his new Savant vehicle...
Thackary: Miss Lablanc, how are you with cats?
Savannah: Why?
Thackary: I need an enginner.

---

That's what I have for now. I'll post more as the campaign continues!

Enjoy!
- Lonewalker

Sooo...one of the party's named Morden, eh?

In that case, there's two questions that need to be asked:

1. Do strange sounds seem to come out of thin air whenever he's around?

2. Has he ever gotten any of the other party members off by themselves
and asked them "What do you want?"

If the answer to either or both of these is "Yes", then they should give
serious consideration to the "Shoot him -- shoot him now" option.



Major Tom

[teh bunneh]

I have here some quotes from the first session of teh Bunneh's new steampunk game set in The Kandris Seal world (mentioned earlier by QuerySphinx).

Glad you're keeping track of them! The three that stick out in my mind were:

Our party consists of a female gunslinger from America, a sorceress from Italy, a Jewish Kabbalist from Romania, and a clockwork man. The final player is debating whether his character should be a man or a woman...
GM: Play the girl. Then your party could be called "Three hot chicks, a robot, and a Jew."

...which set off a whole evening of "Three girls, a robot, and a Jew walk into a bar..." jokes.

The heroes are assigned to investigate a strange Road Rally that seems to have some sort of occult significance. The mysterious founder of the race has offered a 10,000 pound prize to the winner...
Morden: Who is the Guarantor of the prize money?
GM: The First Bank of Ireland.
ADEN: Well, obviously! Haven't we learned by now that all our problems stem from the Irish?

...which set off a whole evening of "potato famine" jokes.

The party's Savant is investigating the racers and their vehicles...
Thackery: Is everyone in the race a Savant?
GM: No, there are some mundane engineers as well. And there are a lot of people who call themselves Savants but who really aren't...
ADEN: You can tell them because when their cars explode, the fireball isn't nearly as spectacular!

[Lonewalker]

If the answer to either or both of these is "Yes", then they should give
serious consideration to the "Shoot him -- shoot him now" option.

Huh. That's why the name sounded familiar....

Thackary's going to keep his Thunderclap Cannon warmed and ready just in case...

- Lonewalker

[Houston GM]

The PCs are federal agents. They are assisting the Atlanta PD SWAT team with a hostage situation.

While discussing the situation:
Henry: "So if we get a shot at the hostages..."
Ham: (interrupting) "You mean the perps."
Henry: "Right. The perps. I'm getting those two words mixed up in my head."
Darnell: "No you're not. You're calling all of them hostages. And that's going to get confusing at some point."
Ham: "Especially if we have to shoot the perps."

Ham messed with cellular transmissions so the perps received a "missed call" notification on their cell phone from an unlisted number. When the perps noticed the missed call, three of them congregated and started arguing loudly about the missed call.
Ham: "I'm going to call their cell phone again. If they're that upset about missing a call, just imagine how distracted they'll be if they actually get one."

After the crisis has been successfully resolved.
Darnell: "If anyone claims that I used excessive force, I'll point out to them that I had 144 bullets with me, and I only used one."

[matrix3]

<snip />
My wife's Smut Field proves it has the Sticky advantage...
<snip />

This made me chuckle...

[Manic Typist]

The PCs are federal agents. They are assisting the Atlanta PD SWAT team with a hostage situation.

While discussing the situation:
Henry: "So if we get a shot at the hostages..."
Ham: (interrupting) "You mean the perps."
Henry: "Right. The perps. I'm getting those two words mixed up in my head."
Darnell: "No you're not. You're calling all of them hostages. And that's going to get confusing at some point."
Ham: "Especially if we have to shoot the perps."

Ham messed with cellular transmissions so the perps received a "missed call" notification on their cell phone from an unlisted number. When the perps noticed the missed call, three of them congregated and started arguing loudly about the missed call.
Ham: "I'm going to call their cell phone again. If they're that upset about missing a call, just imagine how distracted they'll be if they actually get one."

After the crisis has been successfully resolved.
Darnell: "If anyone claims that I used excessive force, I'll point out to them that I had 144 bullets with me, and I only used one."

Clever move! How'd things goes down?

[BlackCobra]

From our dimension-hopping fantasy game:

Xan (elven princess): "I'm sorry, but I don't feel good about getting directions from I-don't-remember-who-I-am girl!"

[Remjin]

<snip />
My wife's Smut Field proves it has the Sticky advantage...
<snip />

This made me chuckle...

I didn't even realize until you just mentioned it... that's hilarious. =)

[Major Tom]

Huh. That's why the name sounded familiar....

Thackary's going to keep his Thunderclap Cannon warmed and ready just in case...

- Lonewalker

Is it double-barreled? He may need to shoot more than once or twice...or
three times.



Major Tom

[teh bunneh]

I have here some quotes from the first session of teh Bunneh's new steampunk game set in The Kandris Seal world (mentioned earlier by QuerySphinx).

I started up a thread in the Pulp Hero boards for the game.