Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

[input.jack]

This ones' from a Champions game I ran a few years ago...

The characters had gone to see a concert by one of the oldest rock bands still around, the Standing Stones (basically the campaign world's analogue to the Rolling Stones). Early on, they get gouged for ticket prices, and people comment.

It turns out that the Standing Stones are secretly a group of black-magic creatures; the lead singer is basically a Death Knight, the drummer is basically a Liche, the lead guitarist is an animated Wood Golem (created as a guard) and the bassist is a Vampire.

A harrowing fight ensues, during which the Standing Stones almost kill Mockingbird, one of the team's heroines and a very well-loved character. Her fiancee goes basically bananas, and while usually the heroes capture villians, this time Starfire, the plasma-projecting flying energy blaster, just has a total freak-out, and systematically destroyes the Standing Stones, one by one.

And looking at the carnage of their remains, strewn about the stage in front of thousands of horrified fans, Silk, the little blonde martial artist with the spirit of an Eastern Gold Dragon bound into her (basically looking like Buffy in a costume) says this...

"Gee...*toes at a bit of smouldering remains of what had minutes before been the worlds most widely-know rock band*...if they know it was going to be their last show...they could have charged more"

________


Okay, different game, same player. Our characters are all high-school students who have recently found out that we have been granted super-powers by ancient Gods. The aforementioned player's character is named Michael, and hes a football player...and the most popular boy in our grade...and hes smart...and hes also a nice guy (which makes people secretly hate him even more, especially Eric the nerd whom nobody notices when Michael's around).

Michael is the only one of us with a car, so hes picking people up so that we can go outside of town and practice with our new powers. He arrives at the home of Indira, who was raised in California, but whose parents immigrated to the US from India.

Indira drags Michael inside to meet her mother, thinking that this will somehow defuse her mothers temper, if she gets to meet the boy with the car. Apparently it didnt work out as well as shed hoped...and Michael didnt really help, but you gotta give the guy credit for guts, when the following exchange takes place...

Indiras mother: Very well....I agree to allow my daughter to accompany you in your car....BUT!...if you impregnate my daughter, i shall call down a thousand thousand curses upon you!

Michael *looks thoughtful for a half second*: ....Thats fair.

[AmadanNaBriona]

A harrowing fight ensues, during which the Standing Stones almost kill Mockingbird, one of the team's heroines and a very well-loved character. Her fiancee goes basically bananas, and while usually the heroes capture villians, this time Starfire, the plasma-projecting flying energy blaster, just has a total freak-out, and systematically destroyes the Standing Stones, one by one.

Bad things always happen when you try to kill a Mockingbird.

unless, of course, its a two kilo mockingbird.

Then you have lunch.

(edit...I really need to go to bed...I'm getting punchy)

[Kirby]

From Sunday's D&D game. Two of the players were present, two were out, so the previously drunk dwarf and the "I love acrobats" elf were doing the adventuring today. The other elf and the human were "doing other stuff."

The dwarf & elf were trying to recruit allies during their investigation. When asked why they were attacked earlier...


Dwarf: I bought them a round of drinks, so I don't remember....

Player 1: Why can't you be on my side?
Player 2: Because you're usually wrong.

When they were being questioned by the constable.

Constable: I was told you killed Johnny.
Elf: (Looking at the dwarf) We killed somebody?
Dwarf: [Oops look on his face]

Our classic misspeak:
Dwarf: I'm going to drink off some of the brew.

Player 1: What did I do to you?
GM: Tell bad jokes.

On why the PCs are in the small village:
Elf: I've heard of nice bad things.

[hooligan x]

Cobalt the drunken cyborg is questioning a prisoner who attacked the team. They are all in Lillith's apartment. Colbalt suggests ripping off the prisoner's fingers until he talks. Lillith's boyfriend, Mad Angus McCrae, advises restraint.

Cobalt: "I can't believe I'm getting cautionary advice from someone named 'Mad Angus'!"

[Arandmoor_Keet]

Just finished our Ebberon game tonight (going on to Starwars...episode 3 addicted me again...need to get it out of my system...)

Rundown of our last mis-adventure leading up to these points...

We were after a vampire at the behest of the guy that refered to us as "discreet" (earlier post...) and had cought up to his coach driven by his sister. In our normal "discreet" manner our Warforged fighter Hammer decided it would be a good idea to fire his crossbow at the lady driving the carrage since we were suposed to be attacking it.

This was at about 240 yards...of course he missed and the carrage started running...

Adam (me): "Way to go and prove how 'discreet' we can be Hammer..."

A few rounds later I 'stopped' the carrage with a web spell anchoring the horse team to the ground... Refering to the lady driving the carrage (she had hit us with a fireball earlier and killed hammer's horse)

Hammer: Well, at least she was strapped in! (refering to the web spell...she failed her save)

After deliberating over what would happen to the coach, the DM and several Warhammer players nearby (after a very fun conversation) decided that after the running poles were dragged into the ground by the horses tripping (full gallop with that web crap gumming up their legs) the coach was a total write off. The girl driving got turned into a jelly-like substance when she took a header with several hundred pounds of wooden coach riding HER into the ground, and the vampire inside (in his coffin...no seatbelt ) was flung bodily out through the roof.

Hammer: Well, she's gone...
Adam: (in refrence to airship jargon) Please make sure your baggage is SECURELY tied down in the over head bins!

Finally, finishing the adventure (we took like a month off from roleplaying due to a string of stuff causing us to miss games...)

We take over the airship the Vampire is hiding on, and direct it to go back to Sharn (where we started) when we get attacked by pirates and they (for various reasons) end up ramming us. Well, after we get off the ship we see that the wreckage is almost directly over a paraid celebrating the long years of service people like the guy who told us to go do this whole thing have given to the peoples of Breiland.

Hammer and Adam: "Uh oh..."

We chase the vampire onto a Lightning Rail (think train) and, while searching for the Vampire run into a fellow Artificer of House Cannith (Orlin) and his Warforged Scout (Sledge).

GM: You get to talking with Orlin du'Cannith and he goes on about how he's meeting his Intelligence contact in Sharn (*insert name here*...same guy who got us on this 'adventure').

Adam (Me): "You wouldn't happen to be Cyran intelligence. Would you?"
Orlin: "Why yes. How did you know?" (I had been acused of being Cyran intelligence when we were told to go do track the vampire...though we were being blackmailed...)
(Me to GM): I hate you.

[zaras]

Not really much of a quote.

scene:- The team is under attack from thanos (he has the space gem and reality) after completely trashing the main sentinel headquarters in los angeles. One of our most powerfull bricks who can actually go toe to toe with thanos has been diligently making his escape by tunneling underground away from the area while everyone else prepares to fight. Said brick intends to join thanos, something i know in character but am unable to act on for complicated in game reasons. The player has been planning this for a while with most other pc's not having a clue as to his plans. My pc is the only one who notices his tunnels (being bearer of the time gem has its benefits). While everyone is busy my pc creeps up to the tunnel and runs up and down it until it collapses (megascale running ).

gm (smiling evily): to player of brick- The tunnel you have been digging collapses around you burying you alive. You think you have little air left and your arms are pinned to your body.

player: "£$%***"

the sound of a mars bar bouncing off my head was suprisingly loud.

nb. The brick did survive afterall, having 90 str means digging your way out of the ground isnt too hard.

[DocMan]

DocMan, you've been scarce! (pardon the interruption)

You don't know the half of it...

Been off the boards for three months now. No hope of catching up with reading.

It's time to start over.

Quotes next time...

Doc

[Enforcer84]

Welcome Back Doc Man.

[Southern Cross]

Same here.

[DocMan]

Thanks guys.

Doc

[Blue]

Current game in progress as I type this:

GM: "You come upon a jutting pit..."
Everyone: (Confused) "A... A what?"
Player 1: "A Jutting pit? Wow, that's everything!"
Everyone: (Laughs)
Me: "I'm confused! I roll dodge!"

[Enforcer84]

Quote of the last two weeks: "No game tonight guys...."

[Blue]

Also current game:

Our barbarian, with a high appearance, is taken away by the local goddess (A spirit of the apple orchard). She favors "lovers", and so we all know what's going on inside the grove where we can't see.

Meanwhile, our craftsman is forging some weapons in an almost god-like manner, that causes thunder...

GM: (Pointing to the barbarian) "It's so loud, even you can hear it."
Barbarian/Player 1: "That's okay. We're so loud, all of you can hear us."

Then shortly...

GM: "She doesn't want you to leave. She goes down on her knees--"
Player 2: "Well, she's probably done that quite a few times by now."

[Kirby]

Quote of the last two weeks: "No game tonight guys...."

-Sigh- That quote comes up for our groups a lot. Strangely enough, the once-a-month gaming group hears it more than the every-other-week group. ::shrugs::

[Wolven]

Quote of the last two weeks: "No game tonight guys...."

Sounds like the group I am in. We havnet played in a month now cause someone is always having something come up. Very very frustrating. I have even started looking for a new group to game with.