Bizarre Spell Ideas

[BlueCloud2k2]

I seem to recall that "I'm not comfortable being grappled there" was what the monster said the one time Varsuvius used it.

 

Lucius Alexander

 

Polymorph to Palindromedary

 

I don't really remember, I read the OotS books a few years ago but haven't really had the time to re-borrow them from my friend so I could catch up on the webcomic.

 

 

Halix's Hallucinogenic Halitosis - Mental Illusions 4d6, NND (Defense is Flash Defense Smell Group, Self Contained Breathing/Does Not Breath, or Immunity to Biological or Chemical Agents; +1), Area of Effect (9" Cone, +1) (120 AP); Gestures (+1/4), Incantation (+1/4), No Range (-1/2), 1 Continuing Charge Lasting 1 Minute (-1) (20 Real Cost)

 

 

Though I wonder if NND and Mental Illusions would actually work together....

[BlueCloud2k2]

Not as much a spell as a magic item:

 

Wand of A Badger to the Face! RKA 2d6 (30 AP); Gestures (-1/4), Incantation (-1/4), OAF (Wand, -1), 1 Charge per day (-2), only does damage on called headshot (-1/2), Reduced Penetration (-1/2) (5 points)

 

Plus Penalty Skill Levels +8 to offset Headshot Penalty (12 AP); OAF (Wand, -1) (6 points)

 

Plus Summon Dire Fiendish or Celestial Honey-Badger (x1 45 point creature), slavishly devoted (+1) (18 AP); Gestures (-1/4), Incantation (-1/4), OAF (Wand, -1), 1 Continuing Charge lasting one minute per day (-1) (5 Points)

 

Total (60 AP, 16 RC)

 

 

For just the spell:

 

A Badger to the Face! RKA 2d6 (30 AP); Gestures (-1/4), Incantation (-1/4), 1 Charge per day (-2), only does damage on called headshot (-1/2), Reduced Penetration (-1/2) (6 points)

 

Plus Penalty Skill Levels +8 to offset Headshot Penalty (12 AP)

 

Plus Summon Dire Fiendish or Celestial Honey-Badger (x1 45 point creature), slavishly devoted (+1) (18 AP); Gestures (-1/4), Incantation (-1/4), 1 Continuing Charge lasting one minute per day (-1) (7 Points)

 

Total (60 AP, 25 RC)

[mhd]

My suspension of disbelief balks at the thought of a slavishly devoted honey badger.

[BlueCloud2k2]

It is also a Dire (meaning slightly meaner) Celestials or Fiendish (creature templates typically found in DnD 3.X).

 

Since it stops being just an animal and becomes a Magical Beast, there is no reason that magic can't make it slavishly loyal.

 

Although one could argue there is no reason magic cannot make anything one summons slavishly loyal.

[BlueCloud2k2]

You may blame the following spells on a bit of humorous fantasy fiction a friend of mine is trying to get published:

 

Spell of the Sack-tap: EB 6d6, NND (Defense is defined at lacking a set of family-jewels, +1)(60 AP); Gestures (-1/4), Incantation (-1/4), RSR (Magic Skill at -6, -1/2), 1 Charge (-2); (15 Real Cost)

 

And while we are at it:

 

The Exploding Castration - RKA 1d6, NND (Defense is defined as lacking a set of family jewels, +1), Does Body (+1), Maximum Damage (+1) (60 AP); Gestures (-1/4), Incantation (-1/4), RSR (Magic Skill at -6, -1/2), 1 Charge (-2) (15 Points)

 

plus Cosmetic Transform 6d6 (man into eunich, NND (as above, so below, +1) (60 AP); Gestures (-1/4), Incantation (-1/4), RSR (Magic Skill at -6, -1/2), 1 Charge (-2) (15 Points)

 

Total Power: 120 AP, 30 RC

[Lucius]

You may blame the following spells on a bit of humorous fantasy fiction a friend of mine is trying to get published:

 

Spell of the Sack-tap: EB 6d6, NND (Defense is defined at lacking a set of family-jewels, +1)(60 AP); Gestures (-1/4), Incantation (-1/4), RSR (Magic Skill at -6, -1/2), 1 Charge (-2); (15 Real Cost)

 

And while we are at it:

 

The Exploding Castration - RKA 1d6, NND (Defense is defined as lacking a set of family jewels, +1), Does Body (+1), Maximum Damage (+1) (60 AP); Gestures (-1/4), Incantation (-1/4), RSR (Magic Skill at -6, -1/2), 1 Charge (-2) (15 Points)

 

plus Cosmetic Transform 6d6 (man into eunich, NND (as above, so below, +1) (60 AP); Gestures (-1/4), Incantation (-1/4), RSR (Magic Skill at -6, -1/2), 1 Charge (-2) (15 Points)

 

Total Power: 120 AP, 30 RC

 

 

Drhoz wrote a version of that with global range and a limitation, rapists only

 

Check out the Quote of the Week from my Game thread

 

Lucius Alexander

 

The palindromedary notes that the thread quotes from all kinds of games but for some reason is in the Champions forum

[BlueCloud2k2]

Drhoz wrote a version of that with global range and a limitation, rapists only

 

Check out the Quote of the Week from my Game thread

 

Lucius Alexander

 

The palindromedary notes that the thread quotes from all kinds of games but for some reason is in the Champions forum

 

In the story my friend is working on, the main character is a witch who is an absolute man-hater. I've often teased her that "at least she writes what she knows."

 

I think the only thing protecting me from her using this spell on me is that I treat her as a friend and not a girl (ie, I don't hit on her, flirt with her, or try to get in her pants).

 

I do believe, however, that if she had access to either of those spells, she would not hesitate to use them *shudders*

[Shadowsoul]

Not as much a spell as a magic item:

 

Wand of A Badger to the Face! RKA 2d6 (30 AP); Gestures (-1/4), Incantation (-1/4), OAF (Wand, -1), 1 Charge per day (-2), only does damage on called headshot (-1/2), Reduced Penetration (-1/2) (5 points)

 

Plus Penalty Skill Levels +8 to offset Headshot Penalty (12 AP); OAF (Wand, -1) (6 points)

 

Plus Summon Dire Fiendish or Celestial Honey-Badger (x1 45 point creature), slavishly devoted (+1) (18 AP); Gestures (-1/4), Incantation (-1/4), OAF (Wand, -1), 1 Continuing Charge lasting one minute per day (-1) (5 Points)

 

Total (60 AP, 16 RC)

 

 

For just the spell:

 

A Badger to the Face! RKA 2d6 (30 AP); Gestures (-1/4), Incantation (-1/4), 1 Charge per day (-2), only does damage on called headshot (-1/2), Reduced Penetration (-1/2) (6 points)

 

Plus Penalty Skill Levels +8 to offset Headshot Penalty (12 AP)

 

Plus Summon Dire Fiendish or Celestial Honey-Badger (x1 45 point creature), slavishly devoted (+1) (18 AP); Gestures (-1/4), Incantation (-1/4), 1 Continuing Charge lasting one minute per day (-1) (7 Points)

 

Total (60 AP, 25 RC)

 

 

Never mind the spell.  I want to see a write-up of a Dire Honey Badger!

[Markdoc]

All honey badgers are dire, so it's included in the basic stat.s

 

I'm also reminded of the conversation from the Goblins webcomi:

 

Fighter: "Summon Celestial Badger? Seriously?"

Cleric: "Give me a break - I'm only level 2"

 

cheers, Mark

[mhd]

Reminds me of one of those cheap D&D books, where a reincarnated badger became something of a party member. Probably the first clue that the author was a bit of a furry...

 

Reincarnation certainly counts as one of the first bizarre spells.

[Shadowsoul]

Reminds me of one of those cheap D&D books, where a reincarnated badger became something of a party member. Probably the first clue that the author was a bit of a furry...

 

Reincarnation certainly counts as one of the first bizarre spells.

 

 

A Greyhawk book involving an alternative version of Llolth and starring a heretical ranger called The Justicar, (he somehow wielded divine spells while actively despising the gods), and a highly destructive faery sorceress?

 

That book had two relationships which required spells to work.  A growth spell to allow the Faery to reach a large enough size to umm ... romantically interact with the Justicar.

 

And, even more weirdly, there was a human sized sphinx who was granted a thousand uses of a polymorph spell so she could similarly interact with a young human man.

 

That could be a spell.

 

'Show love's true form'.   20d6 Transform, Conditional Power - Only to turn a lover into the same race as the caster -2.

[mhd]

Yeah, that sounds familiar enough. Apparently it was from a series of novelizations of classic D&D modules. Don't know what they were smoking when they thought of that. And yes, before you ask, they did make a novel out of the Tomb of Horrors.

 

Haven't read that, though, the novels with the fairy/ranger/gynosphinx/badger teamup was about White Plume Mountain / Descent Into the Depths of the Earth and Queen of the Demonweb Pits, all by Paul Kidd.

 

And come on, he's probably not the first person to think of size and form-changing magics for, well, amorous purposes. Not even talking about very finely targeted versions...

 

(Speaking of which, a German RPG had a pretty great grimoire with lots of spell history and variants for each entry, and they specifically mentioned that non-whole-body versions of the systems paralyzation spell didn't quite work out, to put it mildly)

 

We probably could fill a few dozen pages of another thread about "bizarre spell usages"...

[Michael Hopcroft]

Assuming you live a life where cows normally fall from several thousand feet in the area. 

Summon 64* 0 pt. creature (cow), linked (-1/2)  (30 pts. active 20 pts real),  Telekinesis 35 STR, AOE 32m radius (+1),  linked (-1/2),  only to accelerate cows to terminal velocity (-2).  (70 pts active 20 pts. real)

Hopefully the panicked mooing from the sky overhead will give you a clue that you just might want to get out of the way. (I'd suggest getting under cover, but finding cover that can withstand being hit from above by a 1800-pound cow falling at terminal velocity would be at best challenging...)

[Michael Hopcroft]

I Know What You Mean: When you cast this spell on another person, you each get to see events (like your confrontation) completely from your opposite's point of view. It only applies to the immediate situation, not deeper motivation, and while you might get an insight into the enemy's tactics you won't read their overall plans. And while you do that to him he is doing the exact same thing to you!

[Michael Hopcroft]

You're Not Drunk Anymore!: When you cast this spell on an intoxicated person, the intoxicants are immediately purged from their system (and, in case you were wondering, evaporated away through the exposed skin -- yes, you're sweating booze) and the target is instantly sober. He won't necessarily be happy about it (after all, there was a reason he wanted to be drunk or high), but his reaction times, judgment, and other qualities are the same as they would be had he not had any drinks (or whatever -- this also works with other intoxicants) at all. Any actual abilities that are dependent on being drunk (like some Martial Arts techniques for "drunken masters") become unavailable. The subject must make a CON roll, modified based on how drunk he actually was, to avoid a murderous hangover.

[Michael Hopcroft]

Get Your Goat: When cast on a collection of goats, sheep, or other domestic herbivores, this spell unerringly identifies who they belong to and where their "home" is. It would also tell you if the creatures were unowned (and thus free to do with what you will). Shepherds looking for lost sheep can use it to determine whether that's their lost lamb or someone else's.

[Michael Hopcroft]

I'd Rather See than Be One: You can temporarily transform yourself into any animal you choose, but that animal is colored a bright fluorescent purple, which makes it impossible to blend in with others of the same species (unless their species happens to normally be a bright fluorescent purple). Luckily the transformation is not permanent.

[Lucius]

I'd Rather See than Be One: You can temporarily transform yourself into any animal you choose, but that animal is colored a bright fluorescent purple, which makes it impossible to blend in with others of the same species (unless their species happens to normally be a bright fluorescent purple). Luckily the transformation is not permanent.

 

That should be called "I'd Rather Be than See One."

 

"I'd Rather See than Be One" would Summon such an animal.

 

Lucius Alexander

 

I never saw a purple palindromedary

I hope to someday see one

I undertand why some might find it scary

I don't, but then I wouldn't want to be one.