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An open letter from a Death-Star Architect


BlueCloud2k2

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Pro tip:

 

Do not blame your boss, unless your trousers are feeling particularly tight at the zipper, and you decide to go to his boss. (I won't say "good luck with that," because obvs,but you'll need it anwyay.) And even that is a high-risk, low payoff strategy.

 

High-risk, low payoff strategies should not be used against homicidal cyborg sexless space warlocks. "Trying not to be seen" is usually preferable. That's why committees sign off on things like exhaust ports in the first place.

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I always assumed that a proper risk analysis was conducted during the design phase and that the Death Star was properly insured. Otherwise I don't see how they could have come up with the funds to build a second Death Star so quickly.

 "You love this plan, it is approved as written"  mind trick for the win!

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  • 1 month later...

Pro tip:

 

Do not blame your boss, unless your trousers are feeling particularly tight at the zipper, and you decide to go to his boss. (I won't say "good luck with that," because obvs,but you'll need it anwyay.) And even that is a high-risk, low payoff strategy.

 

High-risk, low payoff strategies should not be used against homicidal cyborg sexless space warlocks. "Trying not to be seen" is usually preferable. That's why committees sign off on things like exhaust ports in the first place.

 

"Trying not to be seen" as a strategy only works if there aren't any of the aforementioned homicidal cyborg space warlocks --

who can find you with their frelling minds any time they want to -- in the immediate vicinity at the time ( :fear: ).

 

 

Major Tom 2009 :eg:

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  • 4 weeks later...

I doubt there was much the designer could have done.

As the letter says, you NEED an exhaust port. Otherwise you just cook everyone in there alive.

I do not think it was teh Force that allowed the torpedoes to turn. I think they were just set the "fly against the wind". They simply maneuvered down that vent. Wich means they could easily get past any curves put in there. And I asume they have enough kinetic force to break through any minor obstacles (like grids put in there).

 

About the 2nd deathstar havng a bigger hole - it was still being build. It was not finished.

They propably had a much more advanced cooling system in place (one that resists torpdoes). Propably lot's and lots of really small vents. Wich is why the rebels had to fly into the thing (rather then just shoot one in from outside).

Also that hole was propably left intentionally by the emperor to entice the rebels to attack.

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So, given the obvious availability of advanced ai, why didn't they just send in a small fleet of such torpedoes with small nav droids to guide them to the exhaust?

 

Also, why not just cover that entire canal and put a giant and thick mesh fence at the entrance. No ship would be able to get in and even if they did, there would be no way out.

 

La Rose.

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The third Death Star should look a bit like a golf ball--every dimple is a mini-superlaser capable of destroying a capital ship, but precise enough to shoot at star fighters.  :eg:

 

Nuh-uh. It should use advanced IT features to achieve a 30% reduction in staffing while hitting a solid 110% gain in the Security Analysis Defence (SAD) metrics as set out by RebelStar Consultants according to  Deployment Overall Organisation Deterrence Obligated Order 3000 (DOODOO 3000) in order to progress Ontarget Management Goals (OMG). Going forwards towards tfullfilling he Imperial Space Navy's Fully Integrated eXcellence Enterprise Directive (FIXED), our goal should be to implement 25% improved heat venting of central reactors through larger exhaust ports, while securing the local threat envirionment through proactive engagement of high vallue targets.

 

To that end, RebelStar Consultants recommends a development schedule envisioning deployment in a Fiscal+10 annual framework following field trials in Fiscal +5 against some of the more expendable planets, with cost overruns address by budget escalators in Fiscal +3, +6 and +8. In the unlikely event that, due to revisiting the field trial objectives in the programme revue of Fiscal +6, Rebelstar Consultants recommends direct transitioning to production of the Death Star V2 Flight II, with envisioned deployment in Fiscal +20.

 

RebelStar's invoice is in the mail. Along with PDFS of the SAD, DOODOO 3000 and FIXED protocols, per our contract with the Imperial Space Navy. You might want to allocate a few TB of storage for the documents.

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So, given the obvious availability of advanced ai, why didn't they just send in a small fleet of such torpedoes with small nav droids to guide them to the exhaust?

 

Also, why not just cover that entire canal and put a giant and thick mesh fence at the entrance. No ship would be able to get in and even if they did, there would be no way out.

Droids are unreliable at best. They are only an option if you have resources but lack manpower. For the rebels it was the other way around. They always appear clearly seperate from true AI from my point of view. Like the VI's from Mass Effect.

 

Any cheap defense for the canal/port could propably be overcome by starfighter lasers or just punched through by torpedoes.

I strongly asume there were some bulkheads/stoppages inside the exhaust port (if only to keep mynocs out). The torpedoes just went through those, having never been designed to ward of military weaponry.

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