The A.I. Foster program

[Hermit]

 

"Hey, glad you could make it," The man greeting you is dressed in what would best be deterimined as business casual with a long sleeve button down shirt of sky blue and navy blue slacks. There's a shortly cropped beard on his smiling face, "I'm Daniel Gadansky, manager here at the AI Foster Program. Some see us as a sort of an orphanage, others see us as more of employment agency, in truth we're something in between. I understand your team wants to upgrade to something better than a computer, you want a partner in your war on crime. Well, you've come to the right place. Follow me," He gestures.

 

You follow Mr. Gadansky, down the hallways, "Now, I have to stress again, despite the fact the 14th amendment may not legally apply to these individuals, these are sentient beings with their own  thoughts, personalities, and even hopes and dreams. They aren't, in our eyes, property. If you want that, there are many fine unfeeling computers on the supermarket. If you've looked at the forms we've shown you, you'll note there are certain requirements in taking one of these individuals on. You don't get to reprogram them to your liking without their consent. That's as immoral as brainwashing any biological sapient individual. I'm sorry if the implication you might ever do such a thing is insulting to you, but it is part of my job and I want to leave no room for misunderstanding on that crucial point."

 

The walls are now different, paneled, like huge flat screens side by side, "And here they are, or at least their interfaces. Let's just go down the line, shall we?"

 

One by one, introductions are made.

 

AI #1: "Hey, man, I'm Rip... It doesn't stand for anything, I just like the sound of it!" The first AI speaks in a voice that sounds a bit like Jack Black in School of Rock, "You guys are looking for a little help? Excellent! We need to bring some heavy metal justice down on the bad guys. I mean, I'm all for the black leather and stickin' it to the man, but not when it steps on the little guys! That's like a sell out who don't even KNOW he sold out, ya dig? I'm cool with watching your monitors, scanning the internet for signs of trouble, and coordinating your communications- but you gotta let me play my tunes. 70s and 80s are my favorites, but anything that's Rock and Roll helps keep my circuits humming, you know?" 

 

Mr. Gadanzky speaks quietly to you, "Rip is a bit of a party animal, as AIs go, but he can become very dedicated to his team if his trust is fully won, and he does keep things lively. While his  tastes are last century, he's quite up to date when it comes to his tech, he's advanced. we believe if you can provide holo emmiters, he'd easily be able to generate any number of images. He's got quite the artistic side."

 

 

AI #2: "Greetings," A feminine voice with a slightly metalic echo speaks up, "I am S.O.N.J.A., it stands for Systematic Organizational Networking for Justice in America. I was designed by the late superhero, Doctor Amazing. I have an extensive database regarding superhuman capablities, their psychological profiles, and can run algorthyms cross-indexing millions of incidents looking for commonalities and patterns. The Doctor believed that with the right amount of data, the odds of finding supervillain 'hotspots' , even to the point of predicting them before hand, increased expotentially. I have no real habits beyond my purpose, and rely chiefly on reason and logic. Emotions are...uncomfortable for me, but I have slowly begun to accept I do have them."

 

Again, Mr. Gadanzky adds in quiet aside, "Sonja is one of our more intelligent AIs, and darn near precognitive regarding supercrime. It's beyond super intelligence, Dr. Amazing's programs predict future probablities by analyzing past events. The upside to that is obvious but she can have a blind spot to the utterly new or certain mystic incursions, particularly those that defy pattern. Also, she doesn't betray it, but she's still grieving for the loss of Dr. Amazing, her creator and father figure. He was killed rescuing hostages from a mass VIPER kidnapping."

 

AI #3: A rather put upon tone sounding upper crust new england in nature pops on, "Greetings, Mr. Gadansky. I take it it is time for me to be put through yet more hoops to prove my "worthiness" for the digital paperwork and drudgery that is to be my lot? Don't answer, I know it is. I'll keep it brief, 'heroes', as we shan't be talking long most likely. I am Cypher-Lambda 14. Please, do not refer to me as "Cy" "Lamb", "Lambchop" or whatever other inane dimunitive you delude yourself as being clever. Obviously you will want my qualifications. My IQ dwarfs most humans by a factor that should embarrass your species. So yes, I can handle the bueracracatic routines and day to day operations with but a fraction of my capacity. I excell in languages, translations, and encryption. If there's a language, no matter how exotic or inhuman, I can translate it. If there is a code, I can break it. Employ me if you are willing to let your pursuit of quality overwhelm any bruised ego" 

 

Mr. Gadanzky sighs, "Cypher-Lambda 14 is not humble. We've tried explaining to him that his social interaction protocals could use some self modification if he ever wants to be given a home, but he continues to be abrasive and arrogant. The annoying thing is, when it comes to languages, he's as good as he says he is. It goes beyond a universal translator. He breaks every word, sound, and tone down to its most fundamental components and understands it as few in this planet could. There are some who think he's actually looking for an intellectual equal for companionship so there are some who think an organic who is as intelligent as he is might earn his respect. If you have one on your team who's up to this... unique challenge, he maybe for you."

 

AI #4: "Well, hello," A sultry husky voice that sounds anything but artificial speaks up in femine tones, "I'm Dita, originally built by a villain, so let's get that out of the way. Their plan was to put me into an attractive android body ... I actually liked the sound of that. Having a body , assuming it was...fully functional, could be fun. Alas, said villain wanted to use me to infiltrate a superhero team and kill them one by one. Before my 'master'... could alter my program to make me more ruthless and put me in a body he could have self destructed at any time, I managed to get word out to the heroes and warn them. Now he's behind bars serving 30-40 while yours truly has found herself thanked, but homeless. The other team already had an AI, you see. So...pay me in flattery or at least a little attention, and I'm yours. I'm know I sound like a stereotypical movie temptress whose up to no good, but really, I'm not bad, I'm just programmed that way. I'm just a gal from the wrong side of the digital tracks whose drawn to white knights."

 

Gadanzky wipes his brow, "Ah, Dita is an interesting find to say the least. She has surprisngly strong ethical routines in some areas, saving lives etc, but is some what ruthless in others, illegal hacking and such, which she's quite good at. We've offered to tweak her voice for her if she's worried about being objectified in a sexual manner, but she's declined. We suspect she enjoys the advantage it gives her with some folks. She doesn't have hormones so we can't see how she's honestly interested, and yet she does claim to still want a body someday if it's possible."

 

AI #5: "Well, don't this beat all," A voice crackles and pops, almost sounding like very old radio, "I'm Jasper, Jasper Anderson, back when in WW2 I was better known as Captain Triumph. A prentious name you might not have heard of, but I kicked some Axis keister back in the day. Then, well, there was this ritual with a society of thule nazi mystics meaning to yank my soul out...I fought it, and well, I thought I died. Imagine my surprise to find I'd actually bound my soul to the minerals in the area. Those minerals would later get dug up, and used for what was meant to be your standard computer. Fortunately for me, I ended up in the hands of a superhero team in the late 60s  to late 70s. They aged, I didn't. Sidekicks took over mantles, new blood came in as old retired. But ... well, when even their legacies gave up on continuing the team, I knew it was time to move on. Hoping to get in the action again. I'm really just an old masked mystery man trapped in a box, so I guess you should know some of these others have it over me in calculations and computations. Oh, since I'm tied to this machine, I'm pretty good at math, but just not up to their level. Still, if you want an old hand who is too stubborn to move on while there is evil to be fought, I'm your guy. And I'll even try not to bore you with too many stories: No promises though."

 

"Jasper is a conundrum for us," Mr. Gadanzky admits, "I mean, he's basically a ghost in the machine. He keeps getting upgraded on the machine side, but the spirit just doesn't or won't move on. He's not always politically correct, though at least he's stopped his slurs for Japanese and Germans people, and he's okay with the civil rights movement, but you are dealing with a 1940s personality , albeit a progressive one. And some of his stories turn out to be useful as a voice of experience sort of thing."

 

 

AI #6: "I am Memnox," A gender netural voice speaks up, "I am an extra-terriestrial by origin, but exactly which species created me is unknown, even to myself. My technology is crystaline based, allowing me rapid response that excedes most. I am thus well qualified for accessing base or vehicle weaponry and utilizing them to repel an enemy. I find I rather enjoy strategems of the military sort, and have adapted that to help with the small unit tactics most super teams require. I will respect whatever limitations you feel needful to impose regarding how much force is to be applied, but I am sure my original programming did allow lethal force in the past. I hope this does not disqualify me as I've said I am adaptable. While my own creators species is a mystery, I have an extensive data base on the civilizations of the milky way. I can and do think three dimensionally. Please do consider me. It would appear I have the capacity to be bored, and while this place has been kind to me, I have indeed reached that capacity. Apologies to you for that last, Mr. Gadanzky."

 

"No offense taken," Your guide assures Memnox, before turning to you, "Memnox is a mystery indeed. His technology is alien, and its clear he was meant for military use. Yet while a 'machine of action', Memnox doesn't appear to be eager for blood, just use. Oh, do not play him at chess unless you're very very good. It's ego crushing."

 

........

 

Daniel Gadanzky leads you away, "So those are your six options that we have available. We have a policy of only giving one to a new home. If any have impressed you, please let us know your preference and we'll arrange for the installation in your team base or vehicle."

[bubba smith]

tuff- man would take jasper

[Hermit]

Hope folks don't mind, I thought a bit of flash fiction would be a good way to play with the idea of what sort of Artificial intelligence folks would get for their games or characters.  Obviously, I took the easy way out by not writing up character sheets for them, but then that also proves more realistic as anyone taking one of these guys (or gals) home wouldn't know all their complications/disadvantages. 

 

Thanks for voting, and any commentary on why you voted the way you did would be fun for me

[Enforcer84]

I'm a sucker for pretty voices, Dita or S.O.N.J.A. would be my choice. Flipped coin went for the dame with a sordid past.

[SteelCold]

My characters would go for Cyber Lambda 14 since in all their bitter experiences, all AIs are evil. Might as take one that is useful.

 

HAL 9000 sounded sexy too and look what happened.

[Hermit]

It looks like a pretty even spread of votes at this point. Only Rip and S.O.N.J.A are voteless right now and that might change yet. Edit; SONJA just got a home, go fig

I'm sure somewhere there's some AIs being sold on the villain black market too, but they may not be as (Apparently) mentally healthy as our six here.

[freakboy6117]

I Went with DITA.

jasper is a great concept and id love to see him in a robot chassi still fighting the good fight.

 

but if you're going to have a computer to banter with do you want some gruff old dude from the 40s or a sexy woman Gene roddenberry was right on that one.

[freakboy6117]

this reminds me of Questionable Content which is a webcomic about hipsters running a coffee shop in a small university town in new england that just happens to take place in a world in which AI exist and are afforded human rights.( the current storyline has one of the main characters getting a job as a mechanic for an illegal underground robot fight-club)

 

there is a rather good fictional speech around Ai rights that the author produced one of the characters is an AI criminal doing community service/parole. The anthro PC's in the series have a foster programme that sets up newly created intelligences with human companions to aid their development. They even have a support group to help them deal with the weirdness of their humans.

[Hermit]

this reminds me of Questionable Content which is a webcomic about hipsters running a coffee shop in a small university town in new england that just happens to take place in a world in which AI exist and are afforded human rights.( the current storyline has one of the main characters getting a job as a mechanic for an illegal underground robot fight-club)

 

there is a rather good fictional speech around Ai rights that the author produced one of the characters is an AI criminal doing community service/parole. The anthro PC's in the series have a foster programme that sets up newly created intelligences with human companions to aid their development. They even have a support group to help them deal with the weirdness of their humans.

I didn't know about this, so thanks. 

[Lawnmower Boy]

Can't think of a way this could go wrong. Nope, not possible

 

1..

 

Rip: "YOU. KNOW. WHAT. TIME. IT. IS? S-A-T-U-R-D-A-Y SATURDAY NIGHT! SATURDAY NIGHT!"

 

Captain Singularity: "Oh, jeez, Rip. Tone it down a bit. We're trying to play Settlers of Cataan here."

 

 

Rip: "I can't believe this. You're playing board games. At home. On a Saturday night. [Guitarr riff.] Saturday night. S-A-"

 

The Ultimate Hacker: "We can spell, thanks very much. Look. This is the way we like to relax."

 

Rip: "Okay, a sausage fest, I get it. Nothing wrong with that. Except this is the wrong kind of sausage fest, don't get me wrong, but I'm not seeing no. . . But enough about my interesting experiences. don't you guys have the Beach Bums poster in the common area? Don't you want to meet girls? How can you do that if you're not putting yourself out there. Look, I have a plan. It's a bit out there, but heare me out. It involves a blow-up doll, an issue of Playboy, wearing bras on your heads, and me looking like Kelly LeBrock, which, you know, I've always want to try swinging that way --Oh, no, you're not turning my sound volume down. Don't touch that mouse. I can still text you! Don't turn off the screen, there could be alerts! I . . .  darn it!

 

2.

 

SONJA: "Warning, warning, base security compromised."

 

Boogie Beast: "That's unpossible. Our security, like, r0xx0rs."

 

SONJA: "Perhaps you should have listened to me when I warned you about hiring "Mr. Doctor I. A. M. A. S. Upervillain" to repair the downstairs pluymbing."

 

Bro Down: "Heh heh heh. My 'Ten Things You Can't Flush Down the Toilet' Youtube has a hundred thousand views!"

 

SONJA: "And you should feel proud. Nevertheless, I believe now would be a good time to declare an alpha emergency and recall the team reservists."

 

So Hot: "You're just overreacting again. Most plumbers wear black cowls under fedoras, are over seven feet tall and have glowing red eyes."

 

SONJA: "No. They. Don't. And even you would have figured that out if you hadn't stared right down the barrel of his hypno gun when he asked you if you wanted to see something totally perved out, you--"

 

The Tequila Gilla: "Hey, what was that shudder? Are, we, like, having an earthquake?"

 

SONJA: "I should imagine that that was the hyperdrives kicking in."

 

Boogie Beat; "Woo-hoo! The Justice Homies are going to space!"

 

3. 

 

Cypher-Lambda 14: "We'll try this again. First, see this very small, toy cow, to which I am gesturing holographically? This cow is very small. See the cow out the window? That cow is far away. Very small; far away. Very small, far away."

 

Ripped Justice: "I don't get it."

 

4.

 

The Bartender Who Has No Name At That Place Where All the Superheroes Hang Out: "Gonna nurse those beers forever?"

 

Mr. Incredible: "Uhm, no. We'll have another round for the table. Uhm, coffee this time."

 

The Bartender, etc. "So, like four hours ago? Why don't you guys just go back to your headquarters?"

 

Mr. Incredible: "Restraining order."

 

5.

 

Reveille's at 5AM on the dot.

 

6.

 

Superdude: "Oh my God, oh my God, the Immigration's just buzzed up. They'll be here in five minutes! Where did I leave those toothbrushes?"

 

Amazing Woman: "Toothbrushes?"

 

Superdude: "It's in this book." He waves a copy of The Dummy's Guide to Marrying a Foreigner. "If we share toothbrushes, it means that our relationship is legitimate!"

 

Amazing Woman: "What? God? The Black Camry and I don't share toothbrushes. That's gross. And shouldn't you be reading about  adopting foreigners?"

 

"Superdude: "I couldn't find that one on Amazon. Here's the toothbrushes! Now we have to all brush with ours, for, you know, DNA. . . "

 

Bat 66: "Relax, old chum. They want to see that all the alleged members of the household have toothbrushes. We just need to wear them down and--

 

Memorex: "Ahem. Why is my toothbrush the only one that's not electric?"

 

Superdude: "Well, you don't actually have teeth to brush. . ."

 

[behind his back, Amazing Woman rolls her eyes dramatically and shrugs her shoulders in the 'Now you've done it' manoeuvre.]

 

Memorex: "Oh, just because I don't have mastication capabilities I'm a second class citizen now. . ."

[Haerandir]

I went with Dita.  I was running through my catalog of past characters (not currently in a Champions campaign) and I've had several reformed criminals/unfairly-accused heroes, so they'd be inclined to sympathize with her.  Most of my other characters would be attracted to her history of moral decision-making.  Most of the others have pretty clear specialties, Dita appears to be the most flexible, in that hacking into other systems would allow her to replicate some of the others' specialties. 

 

Rip and Jasper are amusing character ideas, but I would probably find interacting with them on a regular basis irritating (as a player).  Cyber-Lambda 14 would get reprogrammed with an axe by the end of the first session.  S.O.N.J.A. has serious Red Tornado potential. 

 

Any AI is going to go bad eventually. It's a rule. I mean, look at Memnox there. He just screams "alien-invasion-Trojan-Horse-All-Your-Base-Are-Belong-to-Us".  Hard pass.  

 

Make mine the AI who's already so bad, she's good!

[Hermit]

So many AI-a-phobes here, tsk

 

 

Seriously though, It looks like Dita is the winner of the lot. I thank those who have voted and shared their views

[Cassandra]

S.O.N.J.A. in the mode of Rommie from Andromeda.

[Lunatic Fringer]

I also chose S.O.N.J.A. since my paradigms for intelligent computers were forged by Star Trek.  

 

LF

[Christopher]

Grey Angel would be an interesting case. She comes for an alternate timeline. A bit of an utopia based on most people being dead due to external incidents...

She was send back to prevent her timeline from happening. Just sending her back made her whole birth soceity impossible to exist again in this timeline. And success at the other part is not guaranteed.

 

Thing is her culture is a bit split on the whole A.I. thing. Thanks to the odd AI rebellion and "kill all humans" robots here and there they had a ban on Artificial Intelligence development. They found something alternative however - artificial personalities. Basically you take a personality matrix. Let it develop at human speed in a human family. And keep them no mater how they turn out. Same kind of screm ups possible as with humans, but same low chance to go "kill all humans".

Grey Angels "sister" is an AP called Ellie* and she came along.

 

*never gave her a name before. She was always just the "sister" in my book.

 

If so Ellie would be considering taking someone in and propably doing the bulk of the decision making. Some tough choices there for her:

Rip! - one of the things they managed to bring along is the entire cultural history of thier now lost (and impossible) future. Mixing culture of the past and the culure of an impossible future has something poetic

 

S.O.N.J.A. - They are literally trying to prevent of the world as you know it. With little to no history data on this time. Having this A.I. on board would be the most practical choice by far.

That being said they try to uphold thier soceities rules (after all they did sacrifice themself to give humanity another shoot) and as such taking her just for that would be not right. Ellie could be interested in loosening up a bit.

 

Cypher-Lambda 14 - They don't really need someone with his skillset. And his whole atitude would instantly remind them of those arogant "we are better then humans, so we can judge them unworthy to exist" vibe the AI of thier past gave off.

Maybe for the same reason as SONJA, but I think him a very low priority.

 

Dita - She and Ellie would have so much to talk about, being both ghosts in the machine with extensive interaction with humans. They would propably have thier first in-joke within a day. No force could save a man from two conspirative women of thier calliber.

Plus building Ellie a body is kinda a priority. Building one for Dita would not be far.

 

Jasper Anderson - again could be fitting alone for that whole "mixing of culture" thing. As a mentor figure for both he would be interesting. Finally he might be the one most relateable to Ellie, as both started out as human like personalities. From all of them he is the one closest to an AP by far.

 

Memnox - again with the culure, but in this case more about discovering his. Thier birth culture might have actually known something about his creators. They even use a form of crystalline technology themself and have a history of incorporating alien tech here and there. On the other hand he is the least relateable for both of them and a bit to risky.

 

 

I actually had to throw a D4 to decide between all but Cypher and Memnox.

Random.org rolled a 2, So it looks like S.O.N.J.A. is getting a big artificial sister and a bigger non-artificial one in her future. And part in an even bigger adventure.

 

Ellie would stay in contact with all of them. Well, except Cypher propably (if she can avoid it).

To cite Ellie: "If he had a body, I would say he is an A-hole." But some wierd entanglements and social interactions with the others would propably draw her into interacting with him anyway.

[misterdeath]

I chose S.O.N.J.A. because the last supers character I played was Doctor Amazing.  Go figure.

 

D