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Things that should be in fortune cookies

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     Four different times in my life I've gotten the fortune,  "Depart not from the path from which Fate has you assigned."  Creepy phrasing and all.   I've asked other people and no one ever said they got that one. 

      I can't tell if either I'm in big trouble or in for something cool.

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     Four different times in my life I've gotten the fortune,  "Depart not from the path from which Fate has you assigned."  Creepy phrasing and all.   I've asked other people and no one ever said they got that one. 

      I can't tell if either I'm in big trouble or in for something cool.

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     Four different times in my life I've gotten the fortune,  "Depart not from the path from which Fate has you assigned."  Creepy phrasing and all.   I've asked other people and no one ever said they got that one. 

      I can't tell if either I'm in big trouble or in for something cool.

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8 hours ago, TjackFlash said:

     Four different times in my life I've gotten the fortune,  "Depart not from the path from which Fate has you assigned."  Creepy phrasing and all.   I've asked other people and no one ever said they got that one. 

      I can't tell if either I'm in big trouble or in for something cool.

 

It sounds like you're in big trouble if you have departed from the path from which Fate has you assigned.

 

Lucius Alexander

 

The palindromedary notes that we have not played Fate yet

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If you have a question, and you expect a certain answer, and you want it NOW, chances are you just want a cheap oracle to give you the answer you want.  Just remember after you do it that blaming your mistakes on a fortune cookie isn't gonna work.

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On ‎2‎/‎7‎/‎2018 at 11:35 PM, TjackFlash said:

     Four different times in my life I've gotten the fortune,  "Depart not from the path from which Fate has you assigned."  Creepy phrasing and all.   I've asked other people and no one ever said they got that one. 

      I can't tell if either I'm in big trouble or in for something cool.

 

4 hours ago, Pariah said:

Once is a data point. Twice may be coincidence. Three times is a trend.

 

Lucius Alexander

 

four times is as good an excuse as any for a palindromedary tagline

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Once when my younger sister was in high school, the family went out to eat at a Chinese restaurant.  For whatever reason, my sister was in quite a mood.  Halfway through the meal she stormed out, only to come back in and yell at us that we better bring her fortune cookie home.  Having brought her own car, she left.

 

When the fortune cookies arrived, one of them was slightly open so you could see the paper.  I pocketed in and took it to my parents' house.  I very carefully peeled open the plastic packaging, then slid the little strip of paper out and examined it.  Going to their computer and printer, I matched the font and the point size, printed out a fortune of my own, snipped the paper to fit, and carefully inserted it into the cookie.  The cookie went back in the plastic wrapper (though it was still open).

 

When my sister got home about an hour later, she stormed in and demanded her fortune cookie.  I pointed to the kitchen table, where a single cookie waited for her.  She grabbed it, ripped apart the plastic package, and opened her cookie.  Her eyes got wide and her jaw dropped open as she read the cryptic words.

 

"You need to quit being such a huge bitch to your family."

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