Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
Super Squirrel

Longest Running Thread EVER

Recommended Posts

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER

 

Wait' date=' what? Who am I with again? Man, I thought 'Alias' was confusing.[/quote']

 

My favorite comment along these lines is an old signature line:

 

"Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial."

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER

 

Things have advanced in the last few years. It's evidence of conspiracy' date=' but conspiracy rumors now are promulgated by opposing groups in order to "out" their enemies. So Old Man is not with the Feds; that's what they want you to think.[/quote']

Oh, really? Gee, thanks, Cancer.

 

...or should I call you Mr. CIA?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER

 

It's possible' date=' since radar was such a newfangled gadget then. Or he might have had a very good understanding of the limitations of radar. The most suspect figure on a radar plot in 1943 would have been range; closing to point blank and then firing on the appropriate bearing would have eliminated that source of uncertainty altogether.[/quote']

Here's one account: http://history1900s.about.com/library/prm/blforkintheroad1.htm

 

Part of closing in was making sure that it was Kirishima and not the malfunctioning South Dakota

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER

 

SCIENTISTS DISCOVER NEW ELEMENT

 

A major research institution has just announced the discovery of the

heaviest element yet known to science. The new element has been named

"Governmentium".

 

Governmentium has one neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons,

and 224 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 311.

 

These 311 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are

surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since

Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected,

as it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact.

 

A minute amount of Governmentium causes one reaction to take over 4 days to

complete, when it would normally take less than a second.

 

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 4 years; it does not decay, but,

instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant

neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.

 

In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each

reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of moron-promotion leads some scientists to believe

that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in

concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as "Critical

Morass".

 

When catalyzed with money Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element

which radiates just as much energy, since it has 1/2 as many peons but

twice as many morons.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER

 

Oh, really? Gee, thanks, Cancer.

 

...or should I call you Mr. CIA?

 

Actually, one of my deep, dark secrets is that I actually did apply for a job with the CIA once, and it was offered to me, pending completion of security clearance. Fortunately, VERY fortunately, less than a week before that offer I had been offered another job that I liked much more, so I politely withdrew my interest in the Agency. (I had been up front with them from the outset about my preference in that regard.)

 

The interview process was about as normal as it could be, considering the employer. No matter what, it feels really weird to get into a cab and say, "CIA Headquarters, please." And when you get there, there are DOZENS of cabs in line waiting to get in.

 

But I would have gone nuts there. The work would not have been bad, but the environment would have killed me. The dominant impression I had from the second interview is that the stereotype of intelligence types as being humorless drones ... understates the reality.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER

 

Henceforth' date=' the poster "Cancer" shall be known by his full name... "Cancer Man".[/quote']

 

Naah. I am very far from being the man. Nothing but an underling. Besides, I don't do lung cancer. Breast and ovarian are my bailiwick.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER

 

What kind of work' date=' can you say?[/quote']

 

This was back in 1986. I was about to receive my PhD in astronomy. I had serious doubts about being able to get a job in science. So I applied to the CIA when I saw their ad flyer on campus, thinking, "What do astronomers do? We deduce inobvious information from remote sensing data. They could probably use that..."

 

The job was to figure out what other countries' satellites were doing, and capable of doing. Interesting enough by itself, but I was very happy to have got an offer for a postdoc instead.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER

 

But I would have gone nuts there. The work would not have been bad' date=' but the environment would have killed me. The dominant impression I had from the second interview is that the stereotype of intelligence types as being humorless drones ... understates the reality.[/quote']

 

That's half the reason I didn't join the FBI. I had already judged myself to be too... sensical? ...to succeed in the military; I suspected the FBI was little better, environmentally.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER

 

:rofl:

 

I just saw what happens when a guy receiving oral favors passes gas. No, it wasn't me, I saw it on a blooper clip. The look on her face was priceless. :D

You had to watch a bloopers clip for that? I thought most guys learned THAT one from personal experience.

 

"It's a compliment. It means you relax me that much." Yeah, surrrre . . . :rolleyes:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER

 

You had to watch a bloopers clip for that? I thought most guys learned THAT one from personal experience.

 

"It's a compliment. It means you relax me that much." Yeah, surrrre . . . :rolleyes:

Not in my neck of the woods.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER

 

Well, gee, we don't spend all our time on here!

 

Speaking of which, I'm heading off in a minute and staying off all day to get stuff done here...I don't know why but I've been horribly procastinating work stuff lately...but it's all a balance, and have been productive otherwise. Oh, well, life is all choices. And I work plenty of hours and can do much of my work outside of work hours, so it all balances out (actually in work's favor, on the whole).

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
Sign in to follow this  

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

×
×
  • Create New...