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The cranky thread


Hermit

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Well... the harridan continues to try to control every aspect of our lives here.

Because she has #$##ed at her daughter when left alone for a mere two hours....we always try to have someone here.

So group activities as friends will have to include her or one of us 'baby sitting'.

This controls when we go.

Often WHERE we go (As somethings she doesn't like)

and , of course, we do not talk about some subjects around her for fear of offending.

Her latest inroad? what we watch as a group at home. She will interrupt anything she doesn't like. Heck, she won't shut up during movies she seems to like because she wants to know the name of every damn actor in every damn scene. And if she has no interest at all? She'll ask questions urelated to the show and drop passive agressive hints then when we ask what she WANTS to watch she's 'oh whatever'..

 

As troubles go, I suppose having a genuine gorgon in your  home isn't the worst, but I honestly think she's evil , at least 88% evil. That's right, the idea of any goodness in her is barely a concept.

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I had that exact same pissing match with a coworker, once upon a time.  It was in the main cubicle area where most of the engineers overheard him.  For a week, any engineer who'd gone to public school refused to help him, because "I thought you didn't benefit from paying for education."  Which was every single engineer.

 

To his credit, he got the message.

 

Online you're going to lose.  I suppose you could ask whether her doctor, firemen, barista, Uber driver, EMTs, pastor, and cops all went to private school.

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Two deaths on the wife's side of the family in the last six days.  Both were inevitably going to come sooner rather than later; one was the cousin her age with ALS I mentioned not too far upthread.  The other was the sort-of-stepfather (her mom's second husband, but that marriage happened well after my wife was out on her own) who was living in the house she and her sister now will inherit from her mom (who passed away nine years ago IIRC); yet to be determined is how neglected the place is now, how far in arrears the property taxes are, disposing of his effects, etc.

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The cousin's death hit her hard (the notifying phone call woke her up this mrning); I barely knew him, so the impact on me is my wife's distress.  The sort-of-stepfather was something that we had known was coming soon, and now my wife and her sister have to do the work to restore the house from whatever state it's in; the old man was withdrawing into his own world -- not so uncommon a thing -- and we had been more or less estranged for the last five years or so.  His only child and grandchildren are across the border in Canada, which might make settling his affairs more complex, but that seems not to be a clear issue at this point.  (In this context, I must say she knows what has be done: she resigned from the bar some years ago, but she did wills and probates professionally for years, so this isn't the traumatic unknown that it so often is for survivors.)  Oddly, I have a duty to do on that one (his son has already expressed his OK with this): the deceased was university librarian emeritus at my current institution, so I have to marshal some information, write up the announcement, and submit it through the right channel at the university.

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I woke up this morning and discovered that our refrigerator died sometime in the night. The landlord says he probably can't do anything until at least tomorrow morning. We literally just went to the store over the last two days and filled it. So we have a refrigerator and a freezer chock-full of perishable food, and I have no idea what to do with it all.

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So my mother has had to go into hospital with a suspected severe infection.

The up side is that the non emergency number 111 gave good advice, she rang the surgery, got an appointment today and then had to go to the hospital with a letter. There was no wait for a doctor as she got to go to SAU (Surgical Assessment Unit) straight away. Then they told her that she would be spending the night. So I have had to come home, get some stuff and then will go back.

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On 7/28/2019 at 10:23 PM, Hermit said:

Well... the harridan continues to try to control every aspect of our lives here.

Because she has #$##ed at her daughter when left alone for a mere two hours....we always try to have someone here.

So group activities as friends will have to include her or one of us 'baby sitting'.

This controls when we go.

Often WHERE we go (As somethings she doesn't like)

and , of course, we do not talk about some subjects around her for fear of offending.

Her latest inroad? what we watch as a group at home. She will interrupt anything she doesn't like. Heck, she won't shut up during movies she seems to like because she wants to know the name of every damn actor in every damn scene. And if she has no interest at all? She'll ask questions urelated to the show and drop passive agressive hints then when we ask what she WANTS to watch she's 'oh whatever'..

 

As troubles go, I suppose having a genuine gorgon in your  home isn't the worst, but I honestly think she's evil , at least 88% evil. That's right, the idea of any goodness in her is barely a concept.

 

There's a reasonable and highly uncomfortable solution to this problem.

 

My step-daughter lived with us for awhile.  Until one night she decided she wanted to have a screaming match with my wife.  Then it was a screaming match with me.

 

Then I informed her she could behave in a civilized fashion or live somewhere else (where the room & board would not be free).

 

She chose to live somewhere else.  Though her temper meant that all of her friends and associates declined to house her and she ended up at the grandparents making a 2.5 hour drive each way from work.

 

My wife and I haven't screamed at each other in 12+ years.  There's no reason to tolerate that BS at home.  Especially if you have children around.  :(

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2 hours ago, ScottishFox said:

 

There's a reasonable and highly uncomfortable solution to this problem.

 

My step-daughter lived with us for awhile.  Until one night she decided she wanted to have a screaming match with my wife.  Then it was a screaming match with me.

 

Then I informed her she could behave in a civilized fashion or live somewhere else (where the room & board would not be free).

 

She chose to live somewhere else.  Though her temper meant that all of her friends and associates declined to house her and she ended up at the grandparents making a 2.5 hour drive each way from work.

 

My wife and I haven't screamed at each other in 12+ years.  There's no reason to tolerate that BS at home.  Especially if you have children around.  :(

 

Alas, it's not up to me.

 

 

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I came home last night to find my wife had hot washed and hot dried my cold water / tumble dry only new shirts (2 weeks old - bought 6 of them at $50/ea).

 

Then as I groan over my damaged new clothes I reach into the dryer and find after nearly 50 years of life the tiny flange that holds the door closed.

 

It fits neatly under the nail of my middle finger and gently lifts it partially off the nail bed before splitting it.

 

I had to trim it back to the point that the air hurts.  😐

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