MilkmanDan Posted June 6, 2008 Report Share Posted June 6, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat NT: What Clark Kent is depressed about today. (Added difficultly: you CANNOT say "Being Clark Kent") Lois just got in a big shipment of lead-lined underwear. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted June 6, 2008 Report Share Posted June 6, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat NT: What Clark Kent is depressed about today. (Added difficultly: you CANNOT say "Being Clark Kent") The new safety reflective tape in the stairwells, garage, and equipment spaces has kryptonite granules as part of the reflective stuff. NT: Creative bribes to offer the instructor of the class you've blown off all term. Difficulty: you must actually be able to make the bribe. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BoloOfEarth Posted June 6, 2008 Report Share Posted June 6, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat NT: Creative bribes to offer the instructor of the class you've blown off all term. Difficulty: you must actually be able to make the bribe. "If you give me a passing grade, I'll fill up your car's gas tank. Twice." Okay, so you'll have to take out a student loan to pull it off, but it'd be worth it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MilkmanDan Posted June 6, 2008 Report Share Posted June 6, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat NT: Creative bribes to offer the instructor of the class you've blown off all term. Difficulty: you must actually be able to make the bribe. "Give me an 'A' and I'll have Jessica Alba, Scarlett Johannsen, and Natalie Portman over to your house later tonight to give you a sensual massage." I can MAKE that bribe. I can't deliver on it, but I can make it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Basil Posted June 6, 2008 Report Share Posted June 6, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat NT: Creative bribes to offer the instructor of the class you've blown off all term. Difficulty: you must actually be able to make the bribe. "If you give me a pass, I'll hand you three rounds of 12 gauge 00-buck. If you don't, I'll deliver them in a speedier fashion, if you know what I mean." NT: Ways to get Jessica Alba, Scarlett Johannsen, or Natalie Portman to come to your house. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enforcer84 Posted June 6, 2008 Report Share Posted June 6, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat Tell them they are guests for the new "Chad's Choice" Awards. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted June 6, 2008 Report Share Posted June 6, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat Use your house as a film location for a remake of {i]Valley of the Dolls[/i], and cast them in it. Just make sure they get paid. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted June 7, 2008 Report Share Posted June 7, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat NT: Ways to get Jessica Alba' date=' Scarlett Johannsen, or Natalie Portman to come to your house.[/quote'] Contact their agent(s). Mention that someone's making a new film featuring Johnny Depp. Drop the words 'Oscar buzz' somewhere in the conversation. New Topic: Funniest circumstances to overhear the phrase, "Wow, I'm never going to do THAT again!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enforcer84 Posted June 7, 2008 Report Share Posted June 7, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat Sylvester Stallone, getting his Oscar for the Rocky Screenplay. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BoloOfEarth Posted June 7, 2008 Report Share Posted June 7, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat New Topic: Funniest circumstances to overhear the phrase' date=' "Wow, I'm never going to do THAT again!"[/quote'] From Bill Clinton as he's looking at Hillary. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted June 7, 2008 Report Share Posted June 7, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat New Topic: Funniest circumstances to overhear the phrase' date=' "Wow, I'm never going to do THAT again!"[/quote'] From Hillary, as she looks at Bill. NT: Subtle signs that the principal of your child's grade school is out of his mind. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bazza Posted June 7, 2008 Report Share Posted June 7, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat He casts no shadow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted June 7, 2008 Report Share Posted June 7, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat NT: Subtle signs that the principal of your child's grade school is out of his mind. She waves at the playground and says, "That's where we'll put the artillery firing range." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Basil Posted June 7, 2008 Report Share Posted June 7, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat NT: Subtle signs that the principal of your child's grade school is out of his mind. He's the principal of a grade school; what more proof do you need? NT: Subtle signs the immediately preceding poster is out of his/her mind. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BoloOfEarth Posted June 7, 2008 Report Share Posted June 7, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat NT: Subtle signs the immediately preceding poster is out of his/her mind. He's posting on the NGD boards; what more proof do you need? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bazza Posted June 8, 2008 Report Share Posted June 8, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat He's posting on the NGD boards; what more proof do you need? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MilkmanDan Posted June 8, 2008 Report Share Posted June 8, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat He's posting on the NGD boards; what more proof do you need? He's posting on the NGD boards; and by "posting on the NGD boards" I mean "painting a phlegmatic goat with rancid brie". NT: A fun thing you could do with an NGD poster, a phlegmatic goat, and some rancid brie. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Basil Posted June 8, 2008 Report Share Posted June 8, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat NT: A fun thing you could do with an NGD poster' date=' a phlegmatic goat, and some rancid brie.[/quote'] Feed the brie to the goat, and while it's distracted wrap it up in the poster. What? Not that kind of poster? Oh. Sorry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted June 8, 2008 Report Share Posted June 8, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat NT: A fun thing you could do with an NGD poster' date=' a phlegmatic goat, and some rancid brie.[/quote'] Whatever it is, it's certain to be illegal in Guam. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BoloOfEarth Posted June 8, 2008 Report Share Posted June 8, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat NT: A fun thing you could do with an NGD poster' date=' a phlegmatic goat, and some rancid brie.[/quote'] I'm not allowed to say, but it's a typical Saturday night for Mightybec. NT: "I'm a modern-day Robin Hood, I steal from the rich and give to the _____________!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Psybolt Posted June 8, 2008 Report Share Posted June 8, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat NT: "I'm a modern-day Robin Hood' date=' I steal from the rich and give to the _____________!"[/quote'] gas station attendant Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Basil Posted June 8, 2008 Report Share Posted June 8, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat NT: "I'm a modern-day Robin Hood' date=' I steal from the rich and give to the _____________!"[/quote'] United Way. It's easier to get a deduction on your Income Tax that way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MilkmanDan Posted June 8, 2008 Report Share Posted June 8, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat NT: "I'm a modern-day Robin Hood' date=' I steal from the rich and give to the _____________!"[/quote'] Extremely rich. NT: Explanations of why Big Brown didn't win the Triple Crown today. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Basil Posted June 8, 2008 Report Share Posted June 8, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat NT: Explanations of why Big Brown didn't win the Triple Crown today. There's a joke about feces and the papal tiara in there, but I'm not going to be the one to make it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Psybolt Posted June 8, 2008 Report Share Posted June 8, 2008 Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat NT: Explanations of why Big Brown didn't win the Triple Crown today. Too much stud work Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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