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NGD Scenes from a Hat


Hermit

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Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat

 

NT:

You're late for the fifth time this week! What's yer excuse this time?!?

 

I was skinning my kills to make a new face. Would you like to see it?

 

NT: Your boss walks in to the office to find you in a compromising position with two 19 year old vendors. What do you say?

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Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat

 

And that's what Artcle 14 of the employee hand book prohibits. I hope this demonstration was informative because it's the last time I'm going to be able to use it.

 

 

NT:

New Babysitter; give her the warnings about your kids.

"The shotgun is over the fireplace. The shells are in my dresser, next to the Astroglide and nitrous-cracker. Help yourself to the Ny-Quil... we get the stuff in bulk cheap from Costco. That store has everything! Timmy, Tommy, Tony, and Todd tend to tease Suzy, Sarah, Cindy, and Samantha something awful. Try not to let it get out of hand."
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Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat

 

NT: New Babysitter; give her the warnings about your kids.

"And if they start throwing around the neighbor's houses, here's a glowing green rock. Expose them to it for no more than forty-five seconds. Any longer and they'll get really sick, so be careful. Oh, and they're vulenrable to magic -- you aren't a mage, are you?"

 

NT: Signs that you dialed the wrong number when calling 911 when your house is on fire.

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Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat

 

NT: Signs that you dialed the wrong number when calling 911 when your house is on fire.

 

"You have reached the Goddess help line. Please wait and a goddess will be by for a personal consultation."

 

NT: Tennis Court rulings you would like to see.

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Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat

 

NT: Tennis Court rulings you would like to see.

 

"Miss Williams and Miss Sharavpova, your tops and bras are far too distracting. Remove them immeidately please. Oh, and the customary congratulatory handshake for this match will be repalced by a congratulatory make-out session. Yes, you will be permitted to use your racket handles -- enocrauged, in fact."

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Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat

 

"Just like the legendary Martina Navritalova and Billie Jean King, that ball is out."

 

NT: You've been given One Question to ask God to which He is obligated to give an absolutely truthful answer. And you are going to totally waste this historic opporuntity and throughly piss off the Almighty by asking....

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Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat

 

"Giles, that metal thing is wastign everybody in the Sunnydale Mall! what the Hell is it?"

 

"It's called a Dalek, Buffy. A mutated alien with a xeoncidal mania driving a massively powerful super-advanced death machine."

 

"I suppose getting close enough to kick it would be a problem. Maybe if we could find a way to push it down the stairs...."

 

"it's been tried, Buffy. I'm afraid it's a no-go. Now if you'll excuse me, I seem to have misplaced my Tissue Compression Eliminator."

 

"Your WHAT? is there something you're not telling me, Giles?"

 

(NOTE: There was a persiistent rumor, consistently denied, that Anthony Stewart Head was going to be the new Master and become a semi-regular on the revived Doctor Who. He will be appearing in the new season for 2006, but in only one episode.)

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Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat

 

NT:Two TV shows that should not do crossovers/shared episodes.

"Crikey, there it is! We've found the legendary Big Purple Dinosaur! Maybe if I dangle my baby in front of it, I can distract it long enough to capture it!"

 

NT: You are making a parody of various Hong Kong martial arts movies. What is the name for your main characters "special" martial arts ability?

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Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat

 

"Crikey, there it is! We've found the legendary Big Purple Dinosaur! Maybe if I dangle my baby in front of it, I can distract it long enough to capture it!"

 

NT: You are making a parody of various Hong Kong martial arts movies. What is the name for your main characters "special" martial arts ability?

 

Talk to the Penis Puppet

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