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NGD Scenes from a Hat


Hermit

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Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat

 

"You watch that show where the four celebrities have to live in the house with the bear?"

 

"Bear With Me?"

 

"Yes."

 

"I loved it! Remember when the bear got into the hot tub and.... no time for that now...."

 

(Rep if eligible if you can tell me what I'm quoting).

 

NT: The one person on Earth you would least like to see managing Time and Space.

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Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat

 

NT:Worst possible thing to say when meeting her/his parents for the first time.

GF's Mom: So what's Mister E's mother lke?

 

GF: I don't know. I haven't met her, yet.

 

GF's Mom: Mister E, you've been dating my daughter for months, now. When are you going to introduce her to your mother?

 

Mister E: Gee, I don't know. She's not exactly the kind of girl you take home to Mom. You know what I mean?

 

(Horrible awkward silence)

 

Mister E: Heh... I was just kidding.

 

(Horrible awkward silence)

 

Mister E: My mom and I aren't very close. I love her, but I don't really like to socialize with her.

 

(Horrible awkward silence)

 

Mister E: How about Friday?

 

GF: I don't really want to meet her, anyway.

 

Mister E: Uh... Saturday?

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Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat

 

It's nice to meet you. Wow, my last girlfriend's parents were dead. No akward "meet the parents" moment. I mean sometimes I find that the whole "family" is merely a series of akward dinners where people simply wait until the worst possible moment to reveal a horrible secret they've been hiding. Did I mention that my last girlfriend's parents were dead? When's dinner?

 

 

 

 

NT:

Inappropriate time to tell your crimefighting partner your true feelings for them.

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Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat

 

NT:

Inappropriate time to tell your crimefighting partner your true feelings for them.

 

American Man: "Teen America, there's no way we'll get out of these chains before the bomb goes off! I just wanted you to know that sometimes, when you're asleep, I sneak into your room, and wear your costumes. Also, I like to watch you bathe. Also, I'm wearing a pair of your panties right now. The green thong. Can you ever forgive me?"

 

{5 minutes later, the bomb has still not gone off. Teen America frees herself from her chains, and then frees her mentor}

 

American Man: "Um, so. Shall we head back to Fortress America?"

 

NT: Since I can't possibly escape, why don't you gloatingly explain your master plan?

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Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat

 

NT: Since I can't possibly escape' date=' why don't you gloatingly explain your master plan?[/quote']

 

Dr. Evil-Guy-Dude: Its so simple even a monkey could have figured it out!

Hero-Man: *Snicker*

Dr. Evil-Guy-Dude: Shut up! First I drained every pond in Idaho! Then I captured the ducks that landed at my pool-trap! I carefully trained half of the ducks to carry explosives and drop them on to my targets! The other half of the ducks where trained to infiltrate the Museum and steal the Sterotypical Artifact of Unrivaled Evil Power! Then I used the SAOUEP to block out the sun thus cause the bats to come out early-

Hero-Man: Oh for the love of god kill me already!

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Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat

 

NT: Since I can't possibly escape' date=' why don't you gloatingly explain your master plan?[/quote']

"You can't be serious. I mean, you haven't even tried, have you? I've seen you benchpress an ice cream truck, and now you can't get out of those cuffs which I bought on clearance for $4.99? Who do you think you're kidding? I mean, come ON!"

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Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat

 

NT: Since I can't possibly escape' date=' why don't you gloatingly explain your master plan?[/quote']

Oh come on ! You don't honestly think I'll fall for that old one do you ? I spend all the time laughing at my own cleverness and you get out in a feasible but slightly overstretched way from my clutches but nonetheless is tense and exciting. Then you foil my plan and I have to spend lord alone knows how long in hospital, then I have to start all over again.

Not this time ! This time I am going to do what Goldfinger to James Bond tried to do and kill you now, yes I expect you to die ! I'll say something witty and pithy and then dispose of you ! Something like you aren't meant to get it Mr Burton !

And................. you've got loose. Oh no ! here we go again !

 

NT: Things that even Agent Mulder won't give the time of day

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Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat

 

NT: Things that even Agent Mulder won't give the time of day

 

"Psst! You know how They Say that tin foil hats stop the aliens' mind control rays? Well, they LIE! The foil FOCUSES the mind control rays! People wearing the tinfoil hats are ZOMBIES! It's a big conspiracy!"

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Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat

 

"Agend Mulder, we think the President is engineering massive voter fraud!"

 

"I'm on my way - which aliens are involved?

 

"None - "

 

"Awww, never mind - wait, any weird diseases or cyberkinetic control or mind control!?"

 

"No, they're just going to cross the wires..."

 

"GET OUTTA HERE! Don't bother me until a REAL conspiracy breaks out!"

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