Law Dog Posted December 15, 2003 Report Share Posted December 15, 2003 This is from a MSHRPG. We had landed the groups plane on a jungle airstrip in South America. Denis (GM): Six guerillas come running out of the jungle at you as you come out of the plane. Dangerman (me): When the lead one get's close enough to me, I make my move. Are they carrying guns? Denis : . . .er, no. Dangerman: Machettes? Denis: No. Dangerman : So they're running at us without weapons? Fine, I wait until the lead one gets close enough and do a Jackie Chan type of manuever immobilizing him with his own jacket and using him as a weapon and shield against a couple of the others. Denis: They're not wearing jackets. Why would they be wearing jackets? Dangerman: What then? Are the nude? Denis: They're guerillas. Dangerman: Spell it for me. Denis: G-O-R-I-L-L-A-S. Dangerman: What the hell are gorillas doing in South America? Denis: They're indigenous. They live in the jungle. Poor Denis had his facts a little off, but got it all back on track once he found out that there are no apes in South America and corrected the whole thing to make it a plot involving the Red Ghost. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Agent X Posted December 15, 2003 Report Share Posted December 15, 2003 Originally posted by Law Dog This is from a MSHRPG. We had landed the groups plane on a jungle airstrip in South America. Denis (GM): Six guerillas come running out of the jungle at you as you come out of the plane. Dangerman (me): When the lead one get's close enough to me, I make my move. Are they carrying guns? Denis : . . .er, no. Dangerman: Machettes? Denis: No. Dangerman : So they're running at us without weapons? Fine, I wait until the lead one gets close enough and do a Jackie Chan type of manuever immobilizing him with his own jacket and using him as a weapon and shield against a couple of the others. Denis: They're not wearing jackets. Why would they be wearing jackets? Dangerman: What then? Are the nude? Denis: They're guerillas. Dangerman: Spell it for me. Denis: G-O-R-I-L-L-A-S. Dangerman: What the hell are gorillas doing in South America? Denis: They're indigenous. They live in the jungle. Poor Denis had his facts a little off, but got it all back on track once he found out that there are no apes in South America and corrected the whole thing to make it a plot involving the Red Ghost. ROFLOL - Hey, if Tarzan can fight tigers in Africa... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Heat Posted December 15, 2003 Report Share Posted December 15, 2003 Munchkin, actually Ok, so, Saturday evening, a couple of friends came over, and we wound up playing Munchkin. You know, that card game with the funny cards -- anyway, I played a card that provided armor for the feet, and Klytus immediately dubbed them "Butts of Boot-Kicking". Yeah, well, his back was out, and he'd been on meds all day... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Houston GM Posted December 16, 2003 Report Share Posted December 16, 2003 Radar doesn't work well under water. "I can't think of anyplace safer than the Danger Room. There's something inherently wrong with that." -------------------------------------------- "Brace for < CLANG >." "Torpedo in the boat!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. MID-Nite Posted December 16, 2003 Report Share Posted December 16, 2003 My Champions game has a jedi character. The group is facing a dozen clones of the jedi. After the fight, they interrogate the scientist who created them.... Bedlam(Brick team leader): " Why were they kept locked up down here? " Scientist: " They were unreliable...unstable. " Seraph(martial artist): " Oh...then they were EXACT copies of Dark Sun(the jedi) then? " Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnotherSkip Posted December 18, 2003 Report Share Posted December 18, 2003 "I am a Cavalryman not a Herdsman." earthdawn dwarf character to my elf Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
L. Marcus Posted December 18, 2003 Report Share Posted December 18, 2003 Originally posted by Agent X ROFLOL - Hey, if Tarzan can fight tigers in Africa... "A tiger? In Africa?!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D Posted December 22, 2003 Report Share Posted December 22, 2003 First, some background. So, here we are, playing a Hero System version of Final Fantasy 7. We're playing original characters with what appears to be a slightly different plot line. Characters - Farah - Possibly an Ancient, or at least infused with genetic material from one. She is our summoner and can merge with her summons, rather like the main character from FF6. Scar - A former Turk, and master of the Grammaton school of two-gun-fu. Bald, wears a variant of the Turks blue suit. Nina Scirocco - A native of the western desert regions. Our resident dark/red mage. Good with offensive magics. Beautiful and exotic. Blonde hair and dark skin. Very VERY fast on her feet. Jinn - A chameleon, in both dress, body and personality. An expert at disguise and subterfuge. So good at his job we didn't find out officially he was male for a couple of sessions... A bit of a snarky, sarcastic personality. Hates Sephiroth with a passion - and won't say exactly why. Jason Sikorski - Weaponsmith and expert pilot. Carries a large blade with an integral one-shot gun along the spine of the blade. Dark hair, grey eyes. Wears leather bomber jacket and goggles. Calm and cool. Almost laconic. Idolizes his uncle Cid Highwind and wants to design his own airship. (My character) Tifa, Barret and Red XIII are supporting characters (NPCs) in the party. So, there we are at the Gold Saucer amusement park. We had scheduled a run through the Battle Arena to win favor with Dios, the owner of the Gold Saucer. When we get there, we find Sephiroth and the Turks already there. Long story short - It briefly turns into a 3-way Mexican stand off and then a brief battle before Sephiroth escapes by flying through the skylight (grabbing Farah in the process - uh oh!) Then Dios - basically playing the role of super-bouncer, gets everyones attention, Avalance and Turks alike, and says if we continue to damage his property any more, we'll regret it. And he can back it up, too. He's just fought a couple of our party members to a standstill all on his own - barehanded! And flanking him on either side are several guards, two Iron Giants (enormous iron golems) and a dragon!! Oh boy... So, we're staring each other down... And Jinn... Jinn gets this narrow eyed look of seriousness in his eyes, as if about to join battle... "Alright... here's the plan..." ...Foot scritches across pavement slightly... "... RUN LIKE YOUR ASSES ARE ON FIRE!!!" And he takes off... poof... - this just BROKE me. I LITERALLY fell off my chair I was laughing so hard. Everyone else was laughing too. It took us ten minutes to get calmed down... And then my bastard friends broke me again by repeating the line above... Yes, it's now a "break trigger". Sigh Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susano Posted December 23, 2003 Report Share Posted December 23, 2003 Logan... yer playing in an FF7-styled HERO System campaign? I officially hate you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mavnn Posted December 23, 2003 Report Share Posted December 23, 2003 Originally posted by Susano Logan... yer playing in an FF7-styled HERO System campaign? I officially hate you. www.herogames.com/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=10757 and www.herogames.com/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=10619 if you're interested . It's mainly a trial at the moment, but I might add some new players if it goes well. I can post more turns if anyone will read them . I now return you to your regularly scheduled quotes. Michael Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrosshairCollie Posted December 23, 2003 Report Share Posted December 23, 2003 "Hmm ... antique gold coins." "Wow ... that's new." " ... No it's not." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ZenStorm Posted December 25, 2003 Report Share Posted December 25, 2003 Oh, have I got a few that I could kick in!!! "Holy Lord! That is the worst first inch of anything that I've ever taken into my mouth... there was like... hardly any meat." -Jerry... a friend who commented on a dairy-mart sub-sandwich before thinking his statement through. "That's just pure stupidy." -John... who will never live it down. I've got more but I have to find my memorable quote sheet. Back soon. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Posted December 29, 2003 Report Share Posted December 29, 2003 GM: "Will you kill them?" GM's 3 year old daughter: "Killing is wrong." Me: "Sure, you say that now, but if your Little Mermaid were in danger...!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avatar Posted December 29, 2003 Report Share Posted December 29, 2003 Quotes from just this weekend: " GM- The front of the train just misses striking you as it bounces over your head. Nikon- Bet you wet yourself. Avatar- yep, but thats why I wear a black costume and extra large boots." Our new Shrinker/Grower Flux has just grown to her 24 foot tall form to keep a train from sliding downhill into a bigger mess than it already is, and since we are in an Oriental local, and it is highly offensive to people with tact and class, Blitz yells out, " Godzirra, Godzirra, run for your rives!" Trapped in the cave-in of the train, four of us, mutants all, are being bombarded by a mutant Inhibitor field and four villans( Scorpia, Ripper, Bora, and Muerte) are stalking in on us. We are wounded, SLOOOOOOOOW, and terribly outclassed at the moment. Scorpia- Now I'm finally going to kill you all. Blitz- Get Some!!! We couldn't stop laughing, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrosshairCollie Posted December 31, 2003 Report Share Posted December 31, 2003 While a PC is looking for information on a spell called the Rune of Rest ... *flipping through book* "Hmm ... where's the Rest Rune?" *host pointing* "Through there, first door on the right." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrosshairCollie Posted January 1, 2004 Report Share Posted January 1, 2004 While it may be slightly off-topic, I feel compelled to report that I have found something capable of breaking up a game session faster, and for a longer period of time, than a witty remark from a player ... A Warm Pepsi Belch. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avatar Posted January 2, 2004 Report Share Posted January 2, 2004 yumm, warm pepsi! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chromatic Posted January 2, 2004 Report Share Posted January 2, 2004 My kids and their friends are playing yesterday in my kiddie-campaign. Somehow, I don't think this was just because it was my boys playing. I'm sure this type of situation has happened before...... Wandren (mentalist) is explaining their plan to stop a suspected robbery, they want to hide in the crowd nearby (taking place in Pioneer Square downtown Portland) and jump out and attack when they spot the bad guys show up. Wandren: so we all crouch down low in the crowd and no one sees us. Bulk (brick w/ growth): the guys next to you will. Wandren: but they aren't the badguys! Bulk: but maybe I am. Wandren: You can't hit me, I'm mental! Bulk: (to me the GM) I roll dice and hit him. Chaos ensued. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Avatar Posted January 2, 2004 Report Share Posted January 2, 2004 Yes, it happens all the time. Playing a game, I'm the mentalist leader I.Q. I.Q. "I don't want to be leader." Team" Too bad, we voted and think you are the best choice." I.Q. " I quit as leader then." Team" We won't let you, your it." I.Q. "Ok, ok. Then lets have a practice session." Team " Thats a dumb idea, we don't have to listen to you, dog pile on the mentalist." I.Q. " AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Then all 6 team members, including the 7 foot 350lb Jock (ie. brick) could jump on the 2PD/2ED mentalist, cause it was fun. And they wondered why I used Mental Illusions on them so often. Yeesh! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted January 3, 2004 Report Share Posted January 3, 2004 Playing in a Gamma World game and trying to sneak up on a group of 6 foot long snakes. Only one character had stealth. The 2 without stealth made it. The one with failed. GM:" You 2 hid behind trees, he tried hiding behind a bush." (indicates about 2 foot high.) Failed sealth character:" Damn Bush, I should have hid behind a Clinton!" Later to the android character, who was paniced and out of his league: Don't oil (soil) yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrosshairCollie Posted January 3, 2004 Report Share Posted January 3, 2004 Ah, almost forgot this one from the game with the toxic Warm Pepsi attack ... It's a Warcraft d20 game. I have a Tauren (8' tall Minotaur kinda guy), and there's a Dwarven (4' tall) rifleman with us. DM (to me): "The dwarf comes up behind you, puts his gun on your shoulder and shoots over it ..." Me (loudly and shocked): "Over my shoulder?! What, is he on stilts?!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrosshairCollie Posted January 12, 2004 Report Share Posted January 12, 2004 Stoic, nigh-emotionless character falling prey to a big, well-rolled Presence Attack ... turns to a teammate ... "I just wet your pants. I'm not sure how." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
farik Posted January 12, 2004 Report Share Posted January 12, 2004 During our Fantasy Hero game we were fighting zombies; many years ago our gaming group fought zombies in a GURPS game which is when we first noticed how often the GURPS hit location table generates "Vitals" as a result. So when certain hit locations occured randomly the following statements were made. AFter the 2nd time a zombie hit our minotaur in the "vitals" "These must be GURPS zombies" "I thought zombies ate brains; I guess they really just go after what you think with." and after the Minotaur got a matching result against the zombies "I see you are mastering the Zombie-fu." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrosshairCollie Posted January 13, 2004 Report Share Posted January 13, 2004 *snickers* Reminds me of my last Fantasy Hero game ... we had a swashbuckler. A darn good one ... defenses not so good, of course, but his DCV was positively ridiculous; he was damn near impossible to hit ... unless someone had a hammer. Then, he would always get hit, at least once ... in Location 13. This running joke STILL plagues him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mayday Posted January 13, 2004 Report Share Posted January 13, 2004 Once we were starting a new game with hit locations based on d30. My first damage roll was head, then vitals then head again. The GM stopped the game and had me roll several more times with same result and he stopped the game permanently. Another time he'd made up index cards with random travel encounters. If one came up we picked from the cards. Well, I picked Quicklings my first 3 times in a row and the last time he just gave me a dirty look, ripped up the card and let someone else draw. Good thing too, those things were nasty. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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