Captain Obvious Posted October 28, 2007 Report Share Posted October 28, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... They're a race of butts. They're all different kinds of butts, some are flying, although the man-sized butts are really the only sentient ones. Even the flying butts. The bigger butts are only semi-sentient and the really big behemoth butts are more just point them in the direction you want to go... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
"V" Posted October 28, 2007 Report Share Posted October 28, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Jack-a-Dandy (to assembly of law enforcement agents and rival supers): The question at the heart of the matter is this - who can truly be considered a hero? Is it this power hungry blackguard who happens to have the strength of ten men and is impervious to bullets, or is it the struggling normal man or woman facing hardship and heartache every day in a world that does not care and doing it cheerfully to provide for their family? I think the answer is obvious. (pause) It's the bullet-proof strongman. Obviously. Good lord if you expand the definition to fit everyone with problems, the word becomes meaningless. He may have a criminal record as long as your leg, but he's just what we need to sort these shapechangers out. Now unlock the cell and get him out here tout-suite! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remjin Posted October 28, 2007 Report Share Posted October 28, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... I'm pretty sure that's a rewrite of his original quote' date=' "beer" being the noun in place of "sex."[/quote'] Yes, it is. I should have denoted it somehow... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AdamLeisemann Posted October 29, 2007 Report Share Posted October 29, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Tonight's game. I wasn't paying close attention and heard Dave (the GM) say something like this: They're a race of butts. They're all different kinds of butts, some are flying, although the man-sized butts are really the only sentient ones. Even the flying butts. The bigger butts are only semi-sentient and the really big behemoth butts are more just point them in the direction you want to go... Me (mental imagery getting very weird as brain starts to process what it thinks it is hearing): They're what?? What are we talking about?? Dave: Bugs. What did you think I said? Me: Butts (and then proceeded to riff with the rest of the crew on sentient butts etc). Needless to say I got a bad mark against my name tonight Serves me right - I should listen and keep my mis-hears to myself. I guess that made you the butt of that night's jokes, huh? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Major Tom Posted October 29, 2007 Report Share Posted October 29, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Actually' date=' I was imagining something a bit more... British. Alternately, Samuel L. Jackson. Though if it's that last one, I'd be *reeeeeeally* worried about him. Yeah... especially if the last name of the guy looking for advice/help happens to be Dunne. Major Tom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Weldun Posted October 29, 2007 Report Share Posted October 29, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Okay, this is over a week old, but they still work. Short preamble... We're playing Fading Suns, where two of us are Questing Knights and the rest are all Cohorts. We had been invited to a dinner hosted by the Avestites. Unfortunately, only one of the Knights would be attending and he was a Vorox. As the meal would only be simple fare, I took it upon myself to arrange for a meal more suitable to his lordships appetite. When I informed him of this his reply was, “Water Buffalo? It’s been awhile…” When he asked me as to why I had done this, I answered “I thought it best that you were well fed before you had to handle Avestite’s” The next day, his lordship took it upon himself to distribute leftovers from the local garrison's breakfast by throwing it to a rapidly growing collection of street urchins, to which I quipped “I hope my Lord doesn't consider that to be bait!” Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dreadnought Posted October 29, 2007 Report Share Posted October 29, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... We started a Teen Champions campaign tonight. We started with character introductions, which saw my character (a density increase brick/sonic blaster named Metalhead) out fighting Subterranites in the streets of millenium city with a lot of other teenaged heroes in the middle of December. I come face to face with the Subterranite King, and we square off. King: Your people are weak, and we shall- Metalhead: Wait. I've been out here in the freezing cold fighting your people for an hour now. I am tired, I am cold, and I am ****ing pissed. So please, just shut up and let me punch you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drhoz Posted October 29, 2007 Report Share Posted October 29, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Amongst it's other oddities, such as experimental Soul Batteries wandering at random thru the walls, the Skeleton Crew tenement building is infested with telekinetic constructs programmed to repair damage to the building. They spend their spare time sorting out the junk in the basement - not that they get much spare time. Alas, their sorting abilities leaves something to be desired. The Spectre, acting as building super : Lightbulbs, lightbulbs. Under L, for Lightbulbs? E, for Electrical? Ah. Under, B, for Broken. They're still very handy when, for example, four flying tanks and a few dozen D-soldiers turn up and start blowing great big holes in the walls. The repair crew turn up to inspect the damage, as team-members are frantically pushing students off the roof out of the line of fire, etc Invisible Brownie One : This will need the Invisible Hammer, Frank. Invisible Brownie Two : Yes Frank. Where did we leave the Invisible Hammer? Invisible Brownie One : ..... Let us go find the Invisible Hammer, Frank. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AliceTheOwl Posted October 29, 2007 Report Share Posted October 29, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... We didn't really collect quotes of the week, so I'll just post the ones I remember my character blurting out. The Teen Champions team is discussing what to call themselves, as they can't have a leader (according to the principal) until they have a name. It's down to two: Infiniteens and Super League Against Mayhem (SLAM). Striking Tiger (Japanese martial artist with shapeshifting powers) and Brick argue that Infiniteens is too difficult to pronounce. Singirl (teenage succubus) retorts to Striking Tiger, "Why? It doesn't have an R in it!" She immediately smacks a hand over her mouth and mumbles an apology. Later, Brick has been showing off his powers while wearing his football uniform, despite teammates' warnings that it'll give away his Secret ID. After the battlefield is clear, Singirl takes a look around to see who was watching, and therefore knows Brick's secret. The field is clear, except for the injured and unconscious. Those who were conscious vacated the area upon her arrival. She shrugs. "I guess being a demon has its perks." And, in response to a chastisement from the principal about her method of motivating a male teammate, spoken incredulously, with her arms folded, Singirl says, "You invited a succubus to your school . . . and you don't want that kind of stuff going on?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigdamnhero Posted October 31, 2007 Report Share Posted October 31, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Fortunately' date='[b'] Istvatha V'han[/b] turned up to prevent any further mental trauma. Perhaps the first time the word "fortunately" has been used in that context. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drhoz Posted October 31, 2007 Report Share Posted October 31, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Perhaps the first time the word "fortunately" has been used in that context. Yes, the prospect of Interdimensional War III was much less alarming than more mental images of Vitus and dolphin waxing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Weldun Posted October 31, 2007 Report Share Posted October 31, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Yes' date=' the prospect of Interdimensional War III was much less alarming than more mental images of Vitus and dolphin waxing.[/quote']Gah! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drhoz Posted October 31, 2007 Report Share Posted October 31, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Gah! yeah, it's not as if Vitus would have to wax any dolphins himself, he's got his slavegirl 3 for that sort of thing Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scifi_Toughguy Posted October 31, 2007 Report Share Posted October 31, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... "You're a ninja, you speak ninjanese!" The group speedster trying to convince the group martial artist to come interrogate his captive. After said ninja slipped his bonds and fell into Lake Michigan: "Great, I lost him. Nothing living in there." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Balabanto Posted October 31, 2007 Report Share Posted October 31, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... While this is D+D, it's still pretty funny. The characters are planning to visit an Efreet Pasha in the wilderlands near the City of Brass. Lashakara (Half Dragon Cleric Female): Well, one of our two brothers here will have to pretend to be a rich merchant, and the other his Eunuch! Tirinaith (Half Elf Rogue/Wizard/Magelord) Female: Well, Korag is a monk. He can pretend to be a eunuch. We can make an illusion in case they try to test it. Korag: Umm...is there some way we can do this without pretending to be a Eunuch? Lashakara (Thinking): Well, we could really cut it off, but.... Laucian (Elf Ranger/Scout): I don't really see why we don't go in and tell him the truth! I mean, we're all children of the same father. Tirinaith: This enables him to save face, Laucian. So, is Korag going to be the Eunuch or are you? Korag: This is a really bad idea.... Laucian: There has to be a better way. Lashakara: Well, there is, but we have to pretend to be your wives. Laucian: You're my SISTERS, that's not right! Tirinaith: Lashakara can be the happy one, and I'll be the waspy one. Laucian: I can't believe we're going to do this... Korag: This is the worst idea I've ever seen.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
input.jack Posted October 31, 2007 Report Share Posted October 31, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... The one I wrote down from the Flintlock Fantasy game I just began: [A swarm of energetic Halflings runs past the PC's] Sir Matthew *a 14 year old Knight, who is currently 5'4"*: That was interesting. For a moment there, I felt...tall. Father Covington: Im sure it'll pass. Sir Matthew *regards Father Covington, who is 6'3"*: ...It has. ---------------------------- From the New Titans campaign: -------------------------- GM: Steven Colbert says that no, Neutron cant be his Neo-Human friend, until youve filled out this application form, and passed the interview process. Moving on... ---------------------- GM: Duncan tells you that he's seen Demons before, and he's pretty sure his little brother is one of them! ----------------- Duncan: Dad, you're into character-building. Why cant we drop my little brother off in the woods, with a knife, and see if he can finsd his way home? What?!? Oh, come on! Ill give him a compass! ---------------- GM: You'll get a few pictures taken of you at the Comic COn in your costume. Feline Fury (OOC): Does anyone realize that I -am- Feline Fury? GM: Not a one. What would the real Feline Fury possibly be doing at the San Diego Comcs Con? ------------------ Neutron: Id like to maintain some level opf professionalism, here. I mean, we're already wearing the funny outfits that people are going to make fun of us for. Feline Fury: Theyd better not! If they do, Ill scratch their eyes out! ...Which...Ewww. If you really stop to think about it, thatd be really, really gross ----------------- Feline Fury: They kidnapped Geek Squad! ---------------- Feline Fury: ...Now I cant "un-know" that! ----------------- [Neutron and Inertia are being held in Power Dampers, being monologued to by a Master Villain in an SS uniform] Feline Fury: *Lands on his head, clocking him out* Neutron: TOLD you, b**ch! But you were all 'Oh no, we'll be able to detect her and neutralize her. Feline Fury will never make it down here!' :PPPPPPPPP ----------------- Feline Fury: Its...a ghost....with p*nis envy.... ----------------- Neutron *picks up a CD* : This is either hordes of porn, or soemthing interesting. Feline Fury: You dont find porn interesting? I gotta try harder... Neutron: *spasm* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigdamnhero Posted November 2, 2007 Report Share Posted November 2, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... GM: Not a one. What would the real Feline Fury possibly be doing at the San Diego Comcs Con? Signing photos? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
input.jack Posted November 3, 2007 Report Share Posted November 3, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Signing photos? Well.......yeah -------------------- Some quotes from the Legends Born D&D campaign: -------------------- GM: So...do you HAVE a "Dire Wolly Rhinoceros" figure? Imet (OOC): *Brings in a Star Wars "Bantha" figure* ------------------------ GM: ...and all told, you take a total of 104 hit points. Kethri (OOC): You know I only have 127 hit points, right? Astra (OOC): [deadpan] ...I think theyre trying to kill us. [/deadpan] Imet (OOC): OMG! I think youre right! ---------------------- Kethri (OOC): This cider is so good it makes me wish we'd built the porch! ------------------------- [imet charges, doing a critical hit with a Power Attacked, Holy Smite, with Divine Might going, and totals 197 points of damage!] Imet: DO I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION!?? ------------------------- Imet: Death...is no barrier....to Justice... *dies* ------------------------ Imet (OOC): All right, I arise at "full hit points, spells, and vigor". Since my Lucky has renewed, I do a full Power Attack / Divine Might / Smite Evil on this b*tch! Kethri (OOC): Can I die too? ------------------------- Astra (OOC): Isnt Wynter dead yet? Imet (OOC): No, she has the "Raging Spunt-hole" template. ----------------------- Imet (OOC): I cant survive me! I do bajeebles of damage! Kethri (OOC): Bajeebles? Astra (OOC): Bajeebles bajobble, but they dont bajaowne ----------------------- Wynter: I have all the time in the UNIVERSE! Imet (OOC): Dammit! THATS why my eggs never boil! I dont use instant coffee, or make instant eggs; I NEED a little Time! --------------------------- GM: The floor of the cavern is covered in small, uncut gemstones Imet (OOC): I scoop them into my Bag of Holding and ditch these losers! ;D ------------------------------ Kethri (OOC): Ive got two more attacks. Imet (OOC): Then quit yer yappin, and get ta slappin! Kethri (OOC): *mimes slapping Imet* Imet (OOC): Good answer.... --------------------- GM: You'll be missed. Its still suffering from its Power Attack modifiers. Astra (OOC): Good! Otherwise I'D be suffering from its Power Attack modifiers! -------------------- Imet (OOC): No fair! He's being weirder than ME! Kethri (OOC): Shove a flagpole up your a**. Thats weird. -------------------- Imet (OOC): I burn another Action Point. At this point I dont like them anymore and dont want to have any left on my sheet ----------------------- [imet needs to be painted blue as part of a disguise] Imet: Gwynnifer blue me. Astra: Im glad someone had a good morning! ------------------------- Kethri (OOC): I gotta pee. GM: THANK you, for keeping us posted! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted November 3, 2007 Report Share Posted November 3, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Bloodstone: Heads up, people, we're not alone anymore. Death is here. ColdFire: If Death is here, who's watching my child?! (Explanation: One of the NPCs in the campaign used to be the embodiment of Death, and with ColdFire having just delivered, that NPC had volunteered to babysit.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jhereg Posted November 3, 2007 Report Share Posted November 3, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From our first Valdorian Age game: Brego (barbarian): I say we just break open the door and slaughter all of these guys. Marcus (swordsman): That's not a good idea. Do you see all those stick-like thingies with the string thingies between them? Brego: *pause* I know what a bow is! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enforcer84 Posted November 4, 2007 Report Share Posted November 4, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Cpl Dolby: It looks scary, but it hits like three year old tossing nerf darts! (sadly, used to describe his own mech) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barbara vdB Posted November 4, 2007 Report Share Posted November 4, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... "such as experimental Soul Batteries wandering at random thru the walls". It's not a Soul Battery, It's a Mana Battery that is using Spirit Energy. And it only goes through walls not people. Wait till I get the one with Life Mana stabilized. That one should go through people but not walls. Felicity hasn't worked out how to keep iut in one place. That's the problems with sorcerers with no training making magic items. AS for the Possibly Evil Empress, Felicity didn't attack her, she Cast Healing, then Aid Rec and then was shot because she didn't know that the aliens didn't speak English. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teh bunneh Posted November 5, 2007 Report Share Posted November 5, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From my Fantasy Hero "Fearless Monster Hunters" game... Castilla (the part-demon girl) just discovered that she's part-demon because her father was cursed by an evil goddess, back when he was still an adventurer. This is the source of much angsting. The rest of the party found out, and this exchange happened: Illy: Hey, suddenly I'm more moral than you! Castilla: How do you figure? Illy: No one ever sold my soul to the devil! Castilla: OK, point taken. Castilla later believes that she's growing demonic horns -- she's got two bumps on her forehead that might just be pimples, but maybe not... so she goes to the party's healer. Castilla: Take a look at my forehead! I think I'm growing horns! Kaira: Why are you telling this to me? Castilla: Because you're a doctor! Kaira: I don't know anything about horns -- I'm a doctor, not a vet! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
input.jack Posted November 5, 2007 Report Share Posted November 5, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... A few from the Sequoia City Slayer campaign... ---------------------- Desmond: As the movie said, 'With great power comes great responsibility' Jinx: And they said it a LOT! Teddi: ----------------------- Jinx: Ive heard it improves your eyesight. Teddi: And clears up your skin. Charles: I heard it can make you go blind. Teddi: Thats only if youre by yourself. Then you form a closed circuit with yourself which can burn out your...oh nevermind ------------------------ Jinx: DIE MALL-QUEEN! ------------------------ [Remember that Teddi looks like Emma Watson, and Jinx looks like Lacey Chabert] Jinx: We're a little too old for the pedo crowd. But we have real appeal to the Loli crowd. Teddi: Th...the what?!? Jinx: The "Lolita" crowd. Teddi: You know a disturbing amount about this. Jinx: I have internet. ----------------------- [Teddi perches on a tombstone, swinging her legs and looking bored. Jinx is playing her Nintendo DS, as they wait for a vampire to rise] Teddi: Any time that youre ready, Mr. Bascombe... Jinx: I hope he doesnt rise before I can save. [He does] ------------------------ GM: Theres something in the fog... Teddi (OOC): A dry ice machine? --------------------- Jinx (OOC): I prep to scream. --------------------- Scary Monster In The Fog: Its too bad this pretty little girl doesnt have her friends to protect her *chuckles* Jinx: Thats easily solved... *SCREAMS!*...Thats called "Friend Summoning". -------------------- [Teddi, who was already on her way back to Jinx when she heard her scream, also hears the two Hags talking in the fog. She sneaks around behind them using their own fog as cover] Teddi: *Stakes a Hag through the heart! (It works for a lot of things)* Hag # 1: * Screams and dies!* Teddi: Friend Summoning worked! ----------------------- Hag: Now youve taken BOTH my sisters from me! Teddi: Well, they should have ducked! --------------------- [Charles arrives in time to see Teddi decapitating the Hag] Charles: ...Eww. Jinx: Yeah. We met some girls in serious need of Este Lauder. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Posted November 5, 2007 Report Share Posted November 5, 2007 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Player 1: I Summon a bear Player 2: We're under water Player 1: They'll still fight for me! For a while... (Laughter, as several of us mimic a drowning, fighting brown bear) Player 3: Well, we have a name for our lodge now. The Drowning Bear Lodge! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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