input.jack Posted June 19, 2009 Report Share Posted June 19, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Some quotes from Embria -------------- GM: You find a partially-decayed body on the road, thats basically a skeleton Chyra (OOC): Ill examine the body to see what killed him. GM: Make a "Heal" check Rhiannon (OOC): Isnt it a little late for that?! ------------ Chyra (OOC): Uh oh. The GM has artwork of this stuff. We're screwed ------------ Metrion :*examining a book* Ah. The works of Ulwayne the Tendentious. I used to read his works late at night, when I couldnt sleep. Varga: ...You...made that word up. Metrion: I am a wizard! I have the power to create things! ------------ Chyra: Dont lick the frost-blade! ------------ Varga: I think that this trap was constructed by the Elves. This part here is carved with the elven runes for "thpppppppppppppppp" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Major Tom 2009 Posted June 19, 2009 Report Share Posted June 19, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... This actually reminds me of an old game quote that inspired a logo. In an old LARP set during the 30's, one of the players, playing a German diplomat, was told he had a battleship on call to use as a negotiating tool. Lesson to be learned here, folks: never give a character a battleship in a game; sooner or later, he will use it. Anyways, at one point in the game during a conversation, the character tried to impress another by stating boastfully, in his outrageous German accent, "I have a battle-sheep." "A what?" replied the other fellow incredulously. "A battle-sheep!" repeated the diplomat indignantly. That one stopped the game for a bit. The comment lived on beyond the life of the game and, after one more retelling of the story, our own Susano decided to illustrate this dubious concept. Behold the Krieg Shaff! (Battle Sheep) This lovely image is now the official logo of KFAQ Productions, a small LARP gaming group I was a part of. This puts me in mind of the following statement: "Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote." - Benjamin Franklin Major Tom 2009 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susano Posted June 19, 2009 Report Share Posted June 19, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... I love the little monocle! Yeah' date=' the kaiser helmet and the monocle really make that picture. [/quote'] Thank you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susano Posted June 19, 2009 Report Share Posted June 19, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Hmmm... picture Iron Age Teen Champions' date=' and that was sort of how the session went. [/quote'] I see.... Esper High School isn't quite that dark. Well, isn't supposed to be quite that dark. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susano Posted June 19, 2009 Report Share Posted June 19, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Yeah' date=' the kaiser helmet and the monocle really make that picture. [/quote'] A little larger. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peregrine Posted June 19, 2009 Report Share Posted June 19, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... I see.... Esper High School isn't quite that dark. Well, isn't supposed to be quite that dark. Anything can be made dark - I've seen it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shadow Hawk Posted June 20, 2009 Report Share Posted June 20, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... This actually reminds me of an old game quote that inspired a logo. In an old LARP set during the 30's, one of the players, playing a German diplomat, was told he had a battleship on call to use as a negotiating tool. Lesson to be learned here, folks: never give a character a battleship in a game; sooner or later, he will use it. . Wait a second... 1930's Germany has a battleship? I'm a total history nerd, but I'll delete the rant and just assume you're either in a alt.history or something. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susano Posted June 20, 2009 Report Share Posted June 20, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Wait a second... 1930's Germany has a battleship? I'm a total history nerd, but I'll delete the rant and just assume you're either in a alt.history or something. IIRC, he was talking to Emperor Norton. So it might have been pre-1900s... or something. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IndianaJoe3 Posted June 20, 2009 Report Share Posted June 20, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Wait a second... 1930's Germany has a battleship? I'm a total history nerd, but I'll delete the rant and just assume you're either in a alt.history or something. They had two pre-Dreadnaughts and several, "pocket battleships" (equivalent to battlecruisers). Bismarck was the most famous. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shadow Hawk Posted June 20, 2009 Report Share Posted June 20, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... They had two pre-Dreadnaughts and several' date=' "pocket battleships" (equivalent to battlecruisers). [i']Bismarck[/i] was the most famous. The pre-dreadnaught battleships Schleswig-Holstein and Schlesien would count as "battleships", although they were small (14,000 tons), undergunned (4x11" guns) and short ranged (they'd need refueling to get anywhere.) The 3 "Pocket Battleships" of the Duetchland Class were only called that by English speakers. Built to the Versaille Treaty limits, they officially weighed 10,000 tons (actually heavier), carried 6x11" guns, had incredible range due to thier innovative propulsion system. The Germans called them Panzershiffe (Armored Ship) until about 1942, when they were reclassified as Panzerkruiser (Armored Cruiser, or "Heavy Cruiser" in American). The first was commisioned in 1931. The 2 "Battlecruisers" of the Scharnhurst class were also refered to by the Germans as Panzershiffe, but were classed as "Light Battleships" after 1942. They were commissionned in January of 1939. Bismarck was a true battleship, but wasn't commissioned until 1940. So, a German "Battleship" in the 1930's is problematic for the history nerd. The closest they come to one is the two pre-dreadnaughts. Of course, this is IRL, where Germany lost WW1 and had it's navy dismantled and weren't allowed to build anything like a battleship until after 1935. Of course, you can say he meant "warship" rather than "battleship", it wouldn't be the first time a diplomat got his terms wrong. Or you can tell the nerd to shut up, it's your world and Germany has a battleship in the 1930s. (Oh, something I missed... yes, you must be careful when you 'give' a player a powerful unit 'on call'. He'll find a excuse to call it.) Oh, and this is mostly the rant I deleted. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NestorDRod Posted June 20, 2009 Report Share Posted June 20, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... The pre-dreadnaught battleships Schleswig-Holstein and Schlesien would count as "battleships", although they were small (14,000 tons), undergunned (4x11" guns) and short ranged (they'd need refueling to get anywhere.) Eyes... glazing.. over... The 3 "Pocket Battleships" of the Duetchland Class were only called that by English speakers. Built to the Versaille Treaty limits, they officially weighed 10,000 tons (actually heavier), carried 6x11" guns, had incredible range due to thier innovative propulsion system. The Germans called them Panzershiffe (Armored Ship) until about 1942, when they were reclassified as Panzerkruiser (Armored Cruiser, or "Heavy Cruiser" in American). The first was commisioned in 1931. Must... stay... awake... The 2 "Battlecruisers" of the Scharnhurst class were also refered to by the Germans as Panzershiffe, but were classed as "Light Battleships" after 1942. They were commissionned in January of 1939. Bismarck was a true battleship, but wasn't commissioned until 1940. So, a German "Battleship" in the 1930's is problematic for the history nerd. The closest they come to one is the two pre-dreadnaughts. Of course, this is IRL, where Germany lost WW1 and had it's navy dismantled and weren't allowed to build anything like a battleship until after 1935. Of course, you can say he meant "warship" rather than "battleship", it wouldn't be the first time a diplomat got his terms wrong. Or you can tell the nerd to shut up, it's your world and Germany has a battleship in the 1930s. Zzzzzzz... (Oh, something I missed... yes, you must be careful when you 'give' a player a powerful unit 'on call'. He'll find a excuse to call it.) Oh, and this is mostly the rant I deleted. Huh? Wha? Oh, sorry. You were saying? Hey, my memory of the exact game details is fuzzy. For all I know, it was one of those Alternate History games where Hitler had nukes. The point of the story was the birth of the battle-sheep. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
input.jack Posted June 20, 2009 Report Share Posted June 20, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... I actually like history rants... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drhoz Posted June 20, 2009 Report Share Posted June 20, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Edge City 3D - Californian team in cross-dimensional pursuit of the Black Paladin & Talisman Trawler : 12ft tall ramen-addicted brick Terminus : Super-soldier Miss Chaos : Chaos magus Avatar : Elemental Solar entity Stentorian : loudmouth Zero : paranoid mentalist Trawler wants some armour for those regions he's most frequently shot in. Weldun, GM : 15PD/15ED??? I don't care, I'm not letting you wear a cast-iron nappy! The Republic of Texas & California are bending over backwards for us. Why? Zero : We prevented thermonuclear Mormons Weldun, GM : There was always our joke about the weapon from Space Battleship Yamoto - it really is the Wave Motion Gun. Bye-bye! Terminus OOC : Yes, the Deus ex Machina Cannon they fired at the end of every episode. Weldun, GM : That's because firing it stopped them dead! Zero OOC: Apart from that episode where they'd already stopped, and went backwards. Stentorian OOC : Turn the ship around and fire - you'll get there faster. Weldun, GM : Loretta's made sure that Stentorian is being carried on the same arm as Avatar. Zero is alongside Miss Chaos. Zero OOC: : ...why? Weldun, GM : You really think she's going to let her boyfriend that close to another woman, or creature of ambigous sexuality? Zero OOC: Hmm. And has she considered his gonads that close to a being of radioactive plasma? Stentorian OOC : Yes Weldun, GM : Jealousy beats radiation every time. Weldun, GM : ...And now Miss Chaos wakes up Miss Chaos OOC: Bugger Zero OOC: 'I was having a beautiful dream... The Black Paladin & The Skank were being boiled in baby oil.' Avatar OOC: ... Why baby oil? Zero OOC: I'll leave that as an exercise for the reader. Weldun, GM : You're being carried along on Trawler's arm Miss Chaos OOC: Erk, that's horrible Weldun, GM : You're snuggled up against Zero Miss Chaos OOC: That's worse. Weldun, GM : The sign reads Flint, MI 31miles Zero OOC: That sign is a lie. I can't see any fat bearded liberals with movie cameras Zero wakes up, full of prophesy Zero: Ow. I've got a headful of ambiguous poetry again. Zero OOC: Lions & tigers & Ohms, oh my Trawler: You missed the thirty-foot tall forest-eating bugs. Zero: *pause* Believe me, I do not begrudge you that Miss Chaos: To escape the rest of this conversation I'm flying ahead Trawler: You should have seen the thing's armour. It's even thicker than the codpiece Zero: *long stare* Annnnnd moving right along... Weldun, GM : There's a tower. It's sort of pulsing and throbbing. Zero: We're not talking about Trawler's codpiece again, are we? There followed ten minutes of horribly unavoidable smut. Weldun really, really regretted his planned descriptions. He'd clearly forgotten who he was GMing for. The fact it's a ley-powered flying train line don't help. Group singing - "Travel all over the countryside, Past the ley-lines, past the ley-lines" explanation here - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9MyS9uCcbgg Weldun, GM :plaintively It's not GM, it's GS! Games Sufferer! A trio of flying battlesuits attack, and are promptly encouraged to **** off. Zero: Well, we've learned one thing. They're obviously afraid of trees. This could be tactically useful. Terminus: I disagree - it's not just trees, it's a fear of flying trees. Which is entirely reasonable. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Manic Typist Posted June 20, 2009 Report Share Posted June 20, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Well' date='Aquatic is half Atlantean and raised by surfacers so his own mores regarding clothes have been the source of some amusement for some of the Atlanteans he's met [/Quote'] Therefore, it's initially surprising that a society (or at least it's men, even as a joke) like that would be "seduced" by the (purportedly) more prudish surface dwellers. Then again, sometimes the more prim and proper they seem... there more of a tigress that lurks beneath, quiaff? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Major Tom 2009 Posted June 20, 2009 Report Share Posted June 20, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Edge City 3D - Californian team in cross-dimensional pursuit of the Black Paladin & Talisman Trawler : 12ft tall ramen-addicted brick Terminus : Super-soldier Miss Chaos : Chaos magus Avatar : Elemental Solar entity Stentorian : loudmouth Zero : paranoid mentalist Trawler wants some armour for those regions he's most frequently shot in. Weldun, GM : 15PD/15ED??? I don't care, I'm not letting you wear a cast-iron nappy! The Republic of Texas & California are bending over backwards for us. Why? Zero : We prevented thermonuclear Mormons Weldun, GM : There was always our joke about the weapon from Space Battleship Yamoto - it really is the Wave Motion Gun. Bye-bye! Terminus OOC : Yes, the Deus ex Machina Cannon they fired at the end of every episode. Weldun, GM : That's because firing it stopped them dead! Zero OOC: Apart from that episode where they'd already stopped, and went backwards. Stentorian OOC : Turn the ship around and fire - you'll get there faster. Weldun, GM : Loretta's made sure that Stentorian is being carried on the same arm as Avatar. Zero is alongside Miss Chaos. Zero OOC: : ...why? Weldun, GM : You really think she's going to let her boyfriend that close to another woman, or creature of ambigous sexuality? Zero OOC: Hmm. And has she considered his gonads that close to a being of radioactive plasma? Stentorian OOC : Yes Weldun, GM : Jealousy beats radiation every time. Weldun, GM : ...And now Miss Chaos wakes up Miss Chaos OOC: Bugger Zero OOC: 'I was having a beautiful dream... The Black Paladin & The Skank were being boiled in baby oil.' Avatar OOC: ... Why baby oil? Zero OOC: I'll leave that as an exercise for the reader. Weldun, GM : You're being carried along on Trawler's arm Miss Chaos OOC: Erk, that's horrible Weldun, GM : You're snuggled up against Zero Miss Chaos OOC: That's worse. Weldun, GM : The sign reads Flint, MI 31miles Zero OOC: That sign is a lie. I can't see any fat bearded liberals with movie cameras Zero wakes up, full of prophesy Zero: Ow. I've got a headful of ambiguous poetry again. Zero OOC: Lions & tigers & Ohms, oh my Trawler: You missed the thirty-foot tall forest-eating bugs. Zero: *pause* Believe me, I do not begrudge you that Miss Chaos: To escape the rest of this conversation I'm flying ahead Trawler: You should have seen the thing's armour. It's even thicker than the codpiece Zero: *long stare* Annnnnd moving right along... Weldun, GM : There's a tower. It's sort of pulsing and throbbing. Zero: We're not talking about Trawler's codpiece again, are we? There followed ten minutes of horribly unavoidable smut. Weldun really, really regretted his planned descriptions. He'd clearly forgotten who he was GMing for. The fact it's a ley-powered flying train line don't help. Group singing - "Travel all over the countryside, Past the ley-lines, past the ley-lines" explanation here - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9MyS9uCcbgg Weldun, GM :plaintively It's not GM, it's GS! Games Sufferer! A trio of flying battlesuits attack, and are promptly encouraged to **** off. Zero: Well, we've learned one thing. They're obviously afraid of trees. This could be tactically useful. Terminus: I disagree - it's not just trees, it's a fear of flying trees. Which is entirely reasonable. You forgot to include "inside trader" in Zero's description. Weldun, on the other hand...sounds like the poor bugger ran smack dab into a Porn Singularity rather than the usual Smut Field that seems to be par for the course for this particular group of players. Major Tom 2009 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drhoz Posted June 20, 2009 Report Share Posted June 20, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... You forgot to include "inside trader" in Zero's description. Weldun, on the other hand...sounds like the poor bugger ran smack dab into a Porn Singularity rather than the usual Smut Field that seems to be par for the course for this particular group of players. We theorise that it's because Purrdence was on her way to the Guild at the time - so her Smut Field was under compression. A blue-shifted Smut Field, as it were. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Major Tom 2009 Posted June 21, 2009 Report Share Posted June 21, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... We theorise that it's because Purrdence was on her way to the Guild at the time - so her Smut Field was under compression. A blue-shifted Smut Field' date=' as it were. [/quote'] A Smut Field with its own warp drive...now there's a scary thought. Of course, the bright side to that is if Earth's about to be invaded by aliens, all anyone needs to do is to launch Purrdence into space right at them. Just a few seconds of exposure to such a powerful Smut Field, and the ETIs'll be smothered by such a blanket of sexual innuendo that they'll flee the Solar System in stark raving terror, never to return. Major Tom 2009 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Netzilla Posted June 21, 2009 Report Share Posted June 21, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From last night's game: **** "How are your assassination skills on alligators?" **** "Demon Dog vs Giant Mutant Alligator. This Saturday Night. Only on the Sci Fi Channel." **** "We apparently need to start calling ourselves the 'Rubber Pants Gang.'" "Huh, so that's what RPG stands for." **** "What part of 'Wake me when you have a plan' did they not understand?" "We had a plan. It was just... broken." **** "You should have called in for backup." "I would have if I wasn't too busy screaming." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jkwleisemann Posted June 21, 2009 Report Share Posted June 21, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Hey' date=' my memory of the exact game details is fuzzy. For all I know, it was one of those Alternate History games where Hitler had nukes. The point of the story was the birth of the battle-sheep. [/quote'] Besides - you tell me that a war-sheep would have had any different results. :-P Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Susano Posted June 21, 2009 Report Share Posted June 21, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Besides - you tell me that a war-sheep would have had any different results. :-P No, no, no! He had a battle-sheep! Big difference! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DJ Blackrock Posted June 21, 2009 Report Share Posted June 21, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Only a couple right now, both from our space opera game: Andromachae (NPC): "You're alive with the glow of motherhood!" Jesse: "Is that the tactful way of saying she's fat?" ---------------------- The joys of crossplaying: Cory (male): "I like my uterus!" ---------------------- Also, it's remarkably difficult to keep up a quasi-russian accent while simultaneously trying to sound drunk. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enforcer84 Posted June 21, 2009 Report Share Posted June 21, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Only a couple right now, both from our space opera game: Andromachae (NPC): "You're alive with the glow of motherhood!" Jesse: "Is that the tactful way of saying she's fat?" ---------------------- The joys of crossplaying: Cory (male): "I like my uterus!" ---------------------- Also, it's remarkably difficult to keep up a quasi-russian accent while simultaneously trying to sound drunk. ahem- wouldn't they sound the same, really? /get's beaten by Russians. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jkwleisemann Posted June 22, 2009 Report Share Posted June 22, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Earlier in our episode, Steele was hypnotized and partially vampirized by the villains. Fortunately, she was cured before going full vamp (ever try to stake somebody made of metal?) She's just met the vampire whose mind control screwed her over before again (and is wearing a PRIMUS psi-screening helmet, to prevent this from happening again so easily). Vamp: "You have such beautiful eyes. Why don't you raise that visor so I can see them?" Steele: "I've got a better idea. Know how to spell 'orthodontist'?" *punches him in the face - hits DCV 13, deals 14 Body, and '2' on the Knockback Reduction* Steele: "Time to learn, jackass." Sometimes, the dice *do* recognize dramatic moments. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Narf the Mouse Posted June 22, 2009 Report Share Posted June 22, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... How do you vampirize someone made of metal? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlackCobra Posted June 22, 2009 Report Share Posted June 22, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From before we even started playing, so no campaign to reference. Our group uses a fairly arcane, grown-over-time system of rules for voting on who will run in a particular evening. (Yeah, I know, we have that rare gaming group disease: Too Many GMs. It's rough, but we're suffering through it.) Someone (me?) suggests voting by pointing, rather than the time-honored secret paper ballot. Someone: "Ah, that's not kosher!" Me: "What, point of order, per Robert's Rules?" Someone else: "We don't use Robert's Rules of Order." jtelson: "We don't even use the Dread Pirate Robert's Rules of Order." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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