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Quote of the Week from my gaming group...


Darren Watts
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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

The male lead PC after "succeeding" an EGO roll to not stare at a girl's rather ample chest, for some reason continues to do so.

His reasoning:

"Those bazooms are at least a -6 penalty!"

Massive dice-throwing occurred afterwards, but all in good sport :)

 

-SC

:snicker:

Love it

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

Old Notes from a Fantasy Hero campaign.

"Lom gets knocked off the side of the building, Heike gets a flying lesson, but she doesn't retain much"

 

"The party is ambushed by a group of orcs, but manages to defeat them without any serious injuries happening to the party. The orcs suffer many."

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

More quotes from my Shadowrun4 game.

 

---------------

 

There was a lot of situational slapstick at my last session, but only one real quote.

Wren: I deploy my Dobermans*

GM: Well, the Dobermans have dog brains. So, when the next car goes by, they go chasing after it.

Wren (OOC): I loose more drones that way. :mad:

 

* A Doberman is a man sized, tracked drone that is used as a mobile weapons platform. The AI in the drones has the intelligence of a dog, and takes orders quite literally. Therefore, the "brain" of any drone is referred to as a dog brain.

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

The "losers" of a romantic battle for a male PC's heart having drinks with another female PC (Red):

Kate (normal girl)

Multi-Girl (duplicating action spy)

 

Multi-Girl: I can't believe I lost to her! I mean, she has horns, glowing eyes...

Kate: And she tried to kill us all!

Multi-Girl: Oh you're not over that?

Kate: What?

Red (other PC): Yes, almost everyone has tried to kill us before joining up with us, sort of initiation process.

Kate: That's insane!

Red: (shrugs) It's practical, after all, how can you tell if people are really committed if they're not going to spill blood for it. I mean look at your father.

Kate: (sighs) I'd rather not.

Multi-Girl: I would, he's pretty cute.

Kate: (irked) Stay away from him. It's not like he'd like you, he's pretty selective...

Multi-Girl (duplicates into 8): Quantity has its own quality.

Red (extra snarky): Yes, that quality being "cheap."

 

-SC

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

Oh and one more from the same session, where Sgt Superior and his daughter Kate are being debriefed by the heroes as to what to tell the government :)

 

Red (PC): And umm... that big castle thing was due to... heat waves.

Kate: Heat... waves?

Sgt: Don't interrupt the lady Katie. Heat... waves... got it. And those big horn-and-teeth monsters?

Dreamy (other PC): Uh... mutants.

Sgt: Mutants. Got it. They're always crazy lookin'

Kate: Daddy! They said they were demons and I was held in a magic castle in the middle of a...

Sgt: Katie, honey, I know this is your first op, but you have to understand, there are two kinds of truths: 1) The real truth, the one that Daddy suspects, but can't tell anyone because they will put Daddy in a big crazy house full of the people Daddy's been putting in there for most of his life where they will beating me with socks full of pencils and soap all day and 2) The truth that the intelligence people tell you that you can tell is full of it, but you're better off not questioning for the good of everyone. Especially Daddy's career since that your shrew of a mother decided to stab Daddy in the back with additional monthly payments. (gets more enraged) You know I don't have any foreign accounts woman! If only you were a super-villain, I'd... (looks at Kate) But you know Katie-bear that we love you very much and no matter how much we fight, we still care about you.

Kate: Uh, thanks Daddy.

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

Oh and one more from the same session, where Sgt Superior and his daughter Kate are being debriefed by the heroes as to what to tell the government :)

 

Red (PC): And umm... that big castle thing was due to... heat waves.

Kate: Heat... waves?

Sgt: Don't interrupt the lady Katie. Heat... waves... got it. And those big horn-and-teeth monsters?

Dreamy (other PC): Uh... mutants.

Sgt: Mutants. Got it. They're always crazy lookin'

Kate: Daddy! They said they were demons and I was held in a magic castle in the middle of a...

Sgt: Katie, honey, I know this is your first op, but you have to understand, there are two kinds of truths: 1) The real truth, the one that Daddy suspects, but can't tell anyone because they will put Daddy in a big crazy house full of the people Daddy's been putting in there for most of his life where they will beating me with socks full of pencils and soap all day and 2) The truth that the intelligence people tell you that you can tell is full of it, but you're better off not questioning for the good of everyone. Especially Daddy's career since that your shrew of a mother decided to stab Daddy in the back with additional monthly payments. (gets more enraged) You know I don't have any foreign accounts woman! If only you were a super-villain, I'd... (looks at Kate) But you know Katie-bear that we love you very much and no matter how much we fight, we still care about you.

Kate: Uh, thanks Daddy.

 

Interesting family dynamic going on there, and it seems kinda like the Sarge might have a few .... issues.

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

The heroes are talking to the suspected supervillain who built the first hotel-size space station in orbit.

 

Hero: "They just don't understand your vision, do they?"

 

Supervillain: "And they don't have any business sense, do you know how much it costs to ship water to orbit, when you can just recycle it from urine?"

 

Hero looks at her drink with concern.

 

Supervillain: "More lemonade? I made it myself."

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

Edit: Just to add that I'm having a blast and really glad I made it to GenCon this year!

 

Tonight I played Muppet Hero.

 

Now, one of the things I love about Hero System is that you really can do just about anything with it; but for this purpose, I do have to wonder why he didn't just use Toon! But in any case I had a blast.

 

I played Gonzo the Great. Even for a Muppet, he's a weirdo.

 

We're coming up on the big finish and there's an erupting volcano and rivers of lava in addition to killer robots and frog bounty hunters and Muppet Hammerhead Sharks etc. (which we can't escape because of rivers of lava you see) and he breaks for a "Public Service Announcement." He had the players who were playing Bunsen Honeydew and Beaker (the mad scientist and assistent from Muppet Labs) improvise a commercial for kids emphasizing the importance of learning math. As part of that, Beaker demonstrated multiplication - resulting in a multitude of Beakers.I state that Gonzo was listening and watching carefully and asks if he's learned to multiply too. Before you know it, we have a horde of Gonzos. Now, Gonzo's weird performance art involves a lot of fires and explosions and so forth, so written on the character sheet was a power representing resistance to "Energy Damage" which includes things like fire and heat - and lava. So I announce "I am going to use my multiple selves to make a living bridge across the lava so everyone can flee to safety. Like a bridge over troubled lava, I will lay me down."

 

And I asked "Do I get my theme music?"

 

The Game Operations Director turns to the group and says "all together now...." and they sang in chorus :whistle:"Like a bridge over troubled lava, I will lay me down...."

 

That's when I lost it. I literally fell out of my chair and lay on the floor laughing. I haven't laughed so hard in a long time.:rofl:

 

Should I tell you about Miss Piggy and the hot tub?

 

Lucius Alexander

 

The palindromedary always wanted to be a guest on the Muppet Show

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

Multi-Girl (duplicates into 8): Quantity has its own quality.

Red (extra snarky): Yes, that quality being "cheap."

 

-SC

 

I'd rep this but I must spread some.

 

Should I tell you about Miss Piggy and the hot tub?

 

Lucius Alexander

 

The palindromedary always wanted to be a guest on the Muppet Show

 

Do tell! I don't know if I repped you for this, but I'm out for the day. Would someone else do the honors please?

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

Edge City 3D, weeks and weeks after the last session. Trawler's player's notes are typically unhelpful

 

"I've got 'Coalition Territory' with a box around it that I think means avoid... and 'Grey Seers' with a box around it that I think means go to..."

 

On supervillain names

 

Trawler's player
: Major Disaster and his sidekick Amateur Cameraman, who is always at any scenes of Major Disaster's

Trawler
: We learned how to hunt yaks!

Weldun, GM
: I'm sorry, did you say we learned how to hump yaks?!
:nonp:

Trawler
: HUNT

Zero
: We weren't there
that
long. Besides, they were probably aurochs.

Terminus
: So, we got our aurochs off?

 

NPC
: We had an oracle look at it, but all she could tell was 'To open it meant death'

Zero
: Now that's an amazingly
useful
prophecy

 

Terminus
: It's extracting zero-point energy from a sub-space pocket, but the pocket is destabilizing

NPC
: Bwah?

Zero
: Basically it's eating a universe to keep your truck running

 

Zero
: Hmm. I wonder what would happen if we saved some protoculture tea for Lancer?

Miss Chaos
:
:confused:

Zero OOC
: Two psykers, one world class, and feed the mother psionigenic mutagens...

Weldun, GM
: Menton would go 'I'll have to kill that child before it Wakes Up... Too late, the doctor just slapped it. I'm toast.'

Zero
:
:eg:

 

Then we played Rio Grande's boxed cardgame Race For The Galaxy. Weldun takes notes of the results, for SF-setting inspiration.

 

Draws Homeworld card - Ancient Race. It features a suspiciously hyena-like humanoid with a staff.

 

Me
: Oh dear.

Barbara vdB
: Vitus
again
??!

Me
: Indeed - is there
no
system he won't show up in?

 

David
: "We'll make you an honorary David,and you can part of the Hive-mind"

 

Barbara and I team up for the second game, since I'm still learning. By one of those inspirational co-incidences, the cards we get immediately suggests a theme for our stellar empire.

Drhoz
: Old Terra, Exporting Drugs To The Universe!

Barbara vdB
: Spice World! We grind up the Spice Girls and sell them by the gramme

Barbara vdB
: We're setting up a distant world as a cloning colony, so we can farm the Spice Girls for drugs. Or cook them as Pop Tarts.

Purrdence
: Farm them for drugs? Not Amy Winehouse instead?

 

Barbara vdB
: Spice World and New Columbia get producing, and the second colony ship lands on Narcotica

We lose, alas.

 

Weldun
: Terra, still the tired old man of the galaxy.

 

The winner traded his doomed homeworld for a galactic bazaar, and worked his way up with alien toy shops and more until he ruled THE economic superpower in the game. He also acquired Space Marines.

 

Weldun
: Repo men.

Me
: Mall cops
:D

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

Today's Pathfinder Society Game:

 

GM: What domain's did you take?

Cleric: Fire and Healing.

other player: I cast Cauterize Wound!

 

joke told by GM: This is a chain Sword. It came from the Nexus. It was used to kill lots of people there. Haven't you heard of the Nexus Chainsword Massacre?

 

GM in box text mentions in box text that a Society member has died. A player that has gone negative hps in every adventure he's played in starts to close his binder like he was the one.

GM: No, You cannot be killed in box text.

 

After being attacked by lepers and our monk getting infected: "This is why Monks with short swords make sense.

 

Our rogue keeps trying to use feint with usually bad results.

Rogue: (to goblin) Look over there! *successes with bluff check*

Goblin: Where? *turns*

Rogue: (proceeds to roll a nat one on the attack* I don't know. Where?

 

another time:

Rogue (to HObgoblin) You're shoes untied!

hobgoblin: Huh? *rogue then rolls a nat one to hit*

GM: Your arrow passes over his head as he bends down to tie his shoe.

 

Sorcerer: All I have left is Ray of Frost. I'm going to go Timmy on him!

(MTG reference. A early creature called a Prodigal Sorcerer could be tapped to do 1 point a damage a round. It got nicknamed Tim from Monty Python)

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

Just don't stand behind him when he breaks wind. :idjit::sick::idjit:

 

I once had a character names 'Poison Wind'. She really was 'Silent but Deadly'. Seriously It sounded better in the original Anhkian. Stop looking at me like that.

 

(Actually she gained the ability to turn into a cloud of foul smelling gas, but I named her before that. Prophetic?)

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

From last night's monster hunters game.

 

******

 

GM (OOC): Okay, Sonia needs to give me a perception roll.

 

Sonia (OOC): I made it by 10. Does that mean I sense the fabric of the universe or something?

 

******

 

GM (OOC): You know, of all the felonies I imagined this group committing, this was not one of them.

 

[said after Julian decides to distract the cops by stealing one of their cars.]

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

From GenCon fun times...

 

During Saturday Morning Cartoons run by Hooligan on 8/15/09

 

GM: "I wish I had a Zombie Indian, because then we could have the Village People of the Damned."

 

Bunneh: "Here's some money. Go find a girl named 'Candy Cane'."

GM (as Sad Panda... with a Droopy Dog voice): "I'm a diabetic."

Bunneh: "I guarantee, this is a type of sugar even you can eat."

 

Bunneh: "What about Selma and Graphne?"

Me: "Did she have a horrible accident?"

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

QUOTES FROM GENCON 2009

 

Note: Some quotes may be paraphrased. Also, some attributions are guesses.

 

Hong Kong Superheroes 2009

 

GM: "You're all in the back seat?"

Green Hornet: "It's a big limo."

 

GM: "Usually the limo doesn't topple over the side of cliff nearly as early (in this adventure)."

 

GM: "You see a woman dressed like this: (holds up a picture of Dark Varga)."

Green Hornet: (stares at Dark Varga's Stripperific costume) "... I've got some singles."

 

Michael comments on the action: "It's Stephen Chow, he doesn't have any common sense!"

 

GM to Varga: "The strange Japanese man has rolled into your lap."

 

"Apparently the village worships Cthulhu."

 

GM responds to an action by the Saint of Gamblers: "Ooohh... brilliant idea!"

 

Michael makes a comment on the action: "Vampire Cop Ricky is being played by Wiley E Coyote in this this movie."

 

Masked Rider shows reaction." (Michael sits there with a blank expression. Robert breaks up laughing.)

 

Michael makes a comment on the action: "I can see Green Hornet's thought balloon now: 'I'm never working with these guys again'."

 

Vampire Copy Ricky: "Is it fragile?"

Captain Shin Hayata: "It's... technical."

 

Vampire Copy Ricky: "Let's see if we can bring you down to my level."

(The player had no idea how unintentionally hilarious this was.)

 

"The sequel is now your fault."

 

Hong Kong Superheroes 2010: Night of the Hopping Vampires

 

The Maruchi: "(I) grab a box and aim for (Varga)."

 

Varga: "Last time I needed a simple DEX Roll, I ended up being molested."

 

Varga: "I am currently your blunt instrument."

 

Varga: "Holy crap! How do you misuse a chick with a fist?"

 

Masked Rider: "Masked Rider tests his communicator." (Michael taps his 'com button' and then says nothing. Robert breaks up laughing.)

 

"Hawkarangs."

"Madame McGuiver."

 

GM: "Spider vomits Silly String, because it's a cheap budget."

 

Varga: "We're fighting a kaiju and you (Vampire Cop Ricky) stop for a drink?"

 

Hollow Earth Expedition

 

Jeeba the Cat Warrior: "Nazis... my favorite prey."

 

(Michael has his PC use his Atlantean language power to command the attacking T-Rex to "fetch" a tank of the Evolved Reich.)

GM: "Well, (the T-Rex) breaks a few teeth. However, that's okay, as it can grow new ones. The tank, on the other hand, isn't going to grow a new (gun) barrel."

 

Can of Whup-Ass 2009

 

Foxbat responds to an attack: "What are you dense? Are you retarded? I'm the g0dd@mned Foxbat!"

 

Foxbat responds to an attack: "Note to self, invite Stephen J Hawkman to go duck hunting with Dick Cheney."

 

A character gets knocked out of the fight, resulting in: "I left you alone for five minutes!"

 

A new euphemism for a certain action: "Playing a solo character."

 

"We are the table of suck."

 

Dresden Files Hero

 

"You do know (Fae) prefer pizza?"

 

Tamara is talking to Morty Lindquist.

Tamara: "What's the matter with your mother?"

Morty: "Aaaahhhhh...."

Tamara: That's terrible."

 

"I'm not running up the backside of a troll."

 

"There's no violence in the Dresden Files... really."

 

"(The troll) doesn't freeze. He's Summer Court."

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