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Quote of the Week from my gaming group...


Darren Watts
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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

Currently, one of the D+D 3.5 games I run is set in the Moonshaes, a Celtic/Scottish/Irish setting in the Forgotten Realms.

 

Me: So you arrive in this wonderful roadside inn, and there's even music and dancing after dinner.

 

PC: So there are bards here (All excited, looking for information on the place they're going)

 

Me: Yes.

 

PC: I ask around a little bit. What are their names.

 

Me: Well, the skinny guy is Fymmych Mac Tan, and the large, robust gentleman with the deep bass voice that I cannot replicate is Ruommyggh Thryggh.

 

Another PC: We don't have enough phlegm to pronounce those names.

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

Last gaming session I was reminded of an old quote from D&D. Often the group I was in was distrusted in villages' date=' even if they were needed. We got irritated at it and decided to get snarky. We had a halfling rogue who had a babyface and therefore looked like a human child (And used it shamelessly). We started doing a chant. I wish I could say it, it has a good meter. Group: "Rape. Kill. Pillage and burn. Rape kill pillage and burn." Halfling: "Eat babies!" Repeat as needed. Everyone in the group always gave the halfing a "Whaa???" look even though he always did it. (Part of the routine.) Became a running gag.[/quote']

 

Thats weird. I came up with that exact chant in 7th or 8th grade, in the game group at Casady school in Oklahoma City. Altho it was meant as a chant for the Orcs who were invading the town we were in. Since then Ive heard it from several other people...but I SWEAR I came up with it in 1978 or so. I guess its gotten around! :nonp:

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

Two gorgeous Amazons are arguing over something ultimately trivial but of utmost importance to them personally

 

Rhiannon (OOC): Theyre being so vicious because the stakes are so low

 

Chyra (OOC?): Here are your bikinis and Jell-O. Settle it in the Ring of Honor!

 

------------------------

 

Varga (OOC): My missing d4! Its been gone almost a year! :eek:

 

Chyra (OOC): The Tweenies have brought it back, after using it to save their universe. :cool:

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

Thats weird. I came up with that exact chant in 7th or 8th grade' date=' in the game group at Casady school in Oklahoma City. Altho it was meant as a chant for the Orcs who were invading the town we were in. Since then Ive heard it from several other people...but I SWEAR I came up with it in 1978 or so. I guess its gotten around! :nonp:[/quote']

 

Classics never go out of style.

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

Thats weird. I came up with that exact chant in 7th or 8th grade' date=' in the game group at Casady school in Oklahoma City. Altho it was meant as a chant for the Orcs who were invading the town we were in. Since then Ive heard it from several other people...but I SWEAR I came up with it in 1978 or so. I guess its gotten around! :nonp:[/quote']

 

I recall said chant from the mid-1980s at least.

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

PC is sitting in his car on a stakeout... on the main drag of the sex strip of the city. It's easier just to pay one of the girls to sit in the car with him so they are constantly coming up the window and propositioning him.

 

Things start to get interesting outside, and he needs to get the girl to leave so he can roll out.

 

PC: “You’re beautiful. You don’t need men to make you happy. Get a job. I’m not ready. Have a good night!”

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

A pair of assassins "decloak" from their invisibility ward and attack.

 

Vaela: Assassins!

 

Later another pair decloak

 

Vaela: Assassins!

 

And another pair

 

Vaela: Assassins.

 

Kale: Stop it! Every time you say "assassins" more show up!

 

Two more appear behind Vaela

 

Vaela: ...assassins

 

-------------------------------

 

The Evil Prince has a cadre of soldiers, twelve assassins, and about six notable individual NPCs guarding him when the three PCs and their one NPC friend attack.

 

Kale: Their giant has broken our Sorceress' mind control! We're dead!

 

Talik: Hes only one man! Youve killed LOTS of men! You can take him!

 

Evil Prince: *Haughtily* Quality will always trump quantity.

 

Talik: THATS why we've killed all YOUR men!

 

Vaela: (Oh burn!)

 

---------------------------------------------------

 

GM: Okay, you take a Bruise and an Injury (in M&M thats like a "Captain Kirk cut"; the cut Kirk got from Spock when he sliced Kirks shirt open in the fight on Vulcan which barely scratched Kirk's skin)

 

Utar (OOC): *Sings*

 

MAIMED!

 

Im gonna bleed forever!

 

I was just cut by this guy

 

WHY?!?

 

[Chorus] Dismember...Dismember...Dismember...Dismember...

 

Everyone: *Air guitar rock solo*

 

The Housecats: :nonp::eek::ugly:

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

GM: Okay, you take a Bruise and an Injury (in M&M thats like a "Captain Kirk cut"; the cut Kirk got from Spock when he sliced Kirks shirt open in the fight on Vulcan which barely scratched Kirk's skin)

 

Utar (OOC): *Sings*

 

MAIMED!

 

Im gonna bleed forever!

 

I was just cut by this guy

 

WHY?!?

 

[Chorus] Dismember...Dismember...Dismember...Dismember...

 

Everyone: *Air guitar rock solo*

 

The Housecats: :nonp::eek::ugly:

 

:rofl::lol::rofl:

 

*gasp* OMG... I think I hurt myself...

 

"You must spread yadda yadda"

 

Somebody, please, hit him with the rep stick before he strikes again.

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

Quick setup:

 

Our game is fantasy using the Conan 1st ed. ruleset in a homebrew world. Our characters are Imperial Inquisitors, two former soldiers who after a terrible war have been stationed at a small city to keep the Emperor's Peace, and to root out any signs of treason or handle anything that is beyond that of the local city guard. My character is Belkin, a former cavalry soldier of the Empire's most elite squad, while my friend is Gannon, a former mercenary and general "ends justify the means... as long as I get rich" type. He's the best though, so his general shadiness is overlooked. Also, the Inquisitors are basically like Judges in Judge Dredd, or Spectres in Mass Effect (the ultimate in law enforcement, they answer to no man except for the upper echelons of the nobility, and that's only when the Inquisitor has crossed into their jurisdiction).

 

Anyways, during our first game we were headed to the city we were stationed in and happened by a wagon that had been obviously attacked, the men in it killed. Upon further inspection, we discovered that the wagon still had a great deal of supplies in it; food, water, liquors, medicines, etc. We searched the killed men, and found that they were actually soldiers disguised as travelers. And they had a good amount of coin on them.

 

Gannon: "I don't think this was a robbery," he says as he transfers gold from the men's coin pouches into his own.

 

Belkin: "No, I think you're right. But I think THIS might be!"

 

Another game we were playing "Good Inquisitor Bad Inquisitor" with a suspect, grilling information out of him. Once we were satisfied that we had gotten all we could out of him, I had begun to leave to notify the chief of the guard that he could take him away. As I did so, Gannon drew his sword and calmly angled it directly at his throat. The man started to cry.

 

"Don't embarass yourself," Gannon said. "It'll be over in a moment." Luckily I was able to jump between them and simply cold cock the kid.

 

Course, the Captain of the Guard had him hanged within the hour.

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From my Serenity group 10/5/09

 

Betsy: A toxicology expert who is married to Jayne Cobb (though they don't travel on the same ship)

Nalani: The engineer that will not leave the ship without being all preened up.

Michaela: The trigger happy demolitions expert

Tyler: The drunken pilot (who actually flies better when sauced)

Radley: The scarred rich boy who's got incredible tracking/sniping skills

 

 

* A cargo drop for Badger goes terribly wrong and it is confiscated by the Alliance.

Michaela: "You're driving drunk in front of Alliance."

GM: "Good point... Tyler, The Alliance do a sobriety test."

 

* After the Alliance left and Tyler had opened a bottle of fish oil moonshine. (I don't even know if that exists... if it does BLECH!)

Tyler: "So in all seriousness Radley, do you think I have a drinking problem?"

 

* After discussing the fact that Nalani had slept with Jayne before she knew he was married.

Tyler: "I don't know about that Jayne person, but she sounds hot."

 

* Betsy mentions the possibility of her making mischief when retrieving an informant.

Tyler: "The only thing that will happen to me if she makes problems is an eventual promotion after her death."

 

*On a trip to New Melbourne to visit Michaela's Grandma Fields (Yes, she does bake cookies. She also camps out in her front windows with her friend Gertie and her sawed off shotgun. She hates door to door salespeople.)

Betsy: "Wear ballistic mesh when going to visit grandma."

Radley: "I always do."

 

Michaela: "Yep... That's right... I'm a virgin, gramma."

GM: "That's right young lady. You stay that way til marriage... Not like your gramma."

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Re: From my Serenity group 10/5/09

 

Betsy: A toxicology expert who is married to Jayne Cobb (though they don't travel on the same ship)

 

 

* After discussing the fact that Nalani had slept with Jayne before she knew he was married.

 

 

The first one nearly made me spit my cheerios once I read it the second time. BWUH?

 

The second one makes me wonder how the girl is still alive, since I imagine that any woman who'd marry Jayne (and cared for him in any way) would be a rather... fierce woman.

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Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

LOL! Betsy's actual name is Vera Elizabeth Doyle-Cobb. She was trained by the alliance to be the silent assassin with a vast array of poisons. She once destroyed an entire city block of people in Athens because she was told to.

 

She and Jayne had met during the war and got married (because 1... she liked him and 2... she wanted a cover). She found out she was pregnant and realized he wasn't the fatherin' type of guy so she ran off and found some sucker to believe the child was his.

 

She's the reason he named his gun such a fearsome name.

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