Drhoz Posted March 7, 2011 Report Share Posted March 7, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Dark Heresy - how to deal with the Ork Infestation of Myen-Fio's moon, especially now that the Order of the Black Monoliths has declared it a matter for the Ecclesiarchy and nobody else. Guildenstern : Put me through to Major Schott Schott's Assistant : Yessir. Hey, Dad! It's for you! Guildenstern : Well, now we know who that Adeptus that was hanging around the Major all the time was. Polonius : *nods approvingly* Ah, nepotism. Nothing like generations of family experience to draw on when you're doing a job. Guildenstern has a plan to force the Tau to start fighting the Orks. We go capture 50 Gretchin, strap them to missiles, and launch them in the direction of the Air Caste's space port. To say that Polonius has reservations about this plan is an understatement. Polonius : Brother.. you spent a year in the re-education camps for turning a ship into an unguided missile... what do you think the Tau will do to you if you turn 50 Gretchin into unguided missiles? Schott : The last time I approved one of your plans I spent a year in jail. Polonius : Brother Guildenstern, I must ask you to punish me for a moment of weakness - I just felt pity for the Tau civilians you are going to launch rocket-propelled gretchin against. An actual use for the GMs recurring speech error - the Archangelesk refectory is now going to be called the Ministronium. Polonius : You do realise that if we're caught I'm going to deny all knowledge? Guildenstern : If they find me still holding the detonator I'm going to deny all knowledge. Polonius : But they'll believe you. Polonius : How would you like a napalm enema? Guildenstern : Wouldn't be the first time. Polonius : Trying to psychoanalyse you, Brother Guildenstern, WAS the Tau equivalent of self-flagellation. Guildenstern : Yeah, Polonius is pretty famous. They named this sausage after him. Rosenkrantz : You didn't drop your pants again, did you? Guildenstern : I wear pants now? ... it's hot here, I get sticky... Rosenkrantz : Hey, I know what happened in the slums. I don't WANT to know what sort of things nobles are into. Of course the question remains about how do we capture these gretchin in the first place. Polonius : Want some candy, little goblinoid? Just hop in my tank here... GM : *introducing another NPC* Brother Angst... Polonius : Interesting name.... GM : ... of the Angels of Despair. Polonius : What a surprise Brother Angst, when told of our other plan to ensure the purging of the moon works. Brother Polonius will ask to give a sermon at the Feast Day of the Great Crusader Saint Solar Macharius, and whip the congregation up into a Crusade against the Orks. To say that this would be stirring up a hornet's nest is, like much in this game so far, an understatement. Brother Angst : ... i don't know what to say, or think. Rosenkrantz : That's a common reaction on meeting Brother Guildenstern. Whilst inciting a Crusade is certainly feasible, it would cause major political problems for the human Administratum of the Palantine - not least the ultra-conservative factions complaining if the Crusade gets supported, but they don't. Let alone the Chained Fist Space Marines who 'surrendered' to the Tau, but refuse to support their war effort, but still produce large quantities of suspiciously well-armoured vehicles for the 'civilian' populace, and the Sisters of Battle in every human ministry going around in their disguises of silver catsuits and purple anti-static wigs, and the terrorist group that has no support from the human Administratum, no sirree, etc, and the undercover Inquisitorial presence that even includes Tau operatives... Polonius : You know, the more I learn about the situation here the more I'm sure that the Tau know all about what's going on, but let us play our little games, in the hope that we recognise that life under the Tau Empire is better anyway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Martin2 Posted March 8, 2011 Report Share Posted March 8, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Well I had a player with resistant protection from physical and energy absorption running around a fight with flying VIPER agents who were firing laser rifles at the party screaming “hit me, hit me, please hit me” jumping up and down trying to get them to shoot him. He had no ranged attack so could not hit them but at least they would have wasted shots giving him extra strength and if they landed he would have given them a good thumping. None of them shot at him. Everyone else said afterwards that possibly running around and shouting “hit me, hit me, please hit me” could be the best +DCV power effect ever . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drhoz Posted March 10, 2011 Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Age of Mythology boardgame. With, for some reason, two Egypts in play. Naturally, we split this into Upper and Lower Egypt, and I promptly started a campaign to unify them. Bwahahaha. Lower Egypt : Stop it or I'll sic my mummies on you Upper Egypt : You're going to go complain to your mummy? The Norse bemoan the lack of building resources. Upper Egypt : He needs to get stoned. Or possibly his rocks off Upper Egypt : I'm tempted to send my elephants down the river to stomp all over Lower Egypt Lower Egypt : Greater Egypt, thank you, you inbred southern weirdo. Upper Egypt : Definitely Lower, after my elephants have trampled all over you. Lower Egypt : Greater! Upper Egypt : Spread out over a Greater area maybe. Lower Egypt : Don't call me fat Upper Egypt : Yeah, call him flat, after the elephants have finished with him Lower Egypt : ....damn zombie elephants... One of my regular Cthulhu players, bemoaning AD&D's abundance of cloakers, mimics, carnivorous walls, floors and ceilings, man-eating trousers, etc. Player : **** you, this is Dungeons & Dragons, not Dungeons & Furniture Of course, he WAS talking to my brother, a GM of such evil genius he can - and has - wiped out parties with a stretch of featureless corridor. New Hero 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted March 10, 2011 Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... One of my regular Cthulhu players, bemoaning AD&D's abundance of cloakers, mimics, carnivorous walls, floors and ceilings, man-eating trousers, etc. This reminds me of a rant I saw somewhere online about the perils of D&D, on the very topic of cloakers, lurkers, trappers, piercers, and spirit-possessed garments... "How did any humanoid race ever manage to evolve in this world? First, there are monsters around ever corner. Second, the walls, floors and ceilings are potentially dangerous. But to top it off, even you own god-damned clothes are trying to kill you!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drhoz Posted March 10, 2011 Report Share Posted March 10, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... This reminds me of a rant I saw somewhere online about the perils of D&D, on the very topic of cloakers, lurkers, trappers, piercers, and spirit-possessed garments... "How did any humanoid race ever manage to evolve in this world? First, there are monsters around ever corner. Second, the walls, floors and ceilings are potentially dangerous. But to top it off, even you own god-damned clothes are trying to kill you!" This article, perchance? "This brings up the first issue I have with D&D: There is no hope for you if you exist in this world. Nothing can be trusted. If the game master wants to kill you, you're dead. Think I'm exaggerating? Wait until I show you the monster that kills you by becoming your pants and tricking you into putting them on." They answered their own question - carnivorous architecture and clothing would be a bit conspicuous before they were any sentient beings around to produce them Although you do have to wonder at the mad genius of whoever bred the original Gelatinous Cube, presumably to clean up rubbish and corpses from 10-by-10 corridors. Then of course, you have mad geniuses like Ian, in the hands of whom a Cube is a deathtrap for even well equipped parties if they aren't clinically paranoid. But then Ian's sorcerers are the kind of people who polymorph Beholders into chickens, and vice versa, for fun. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted March 11, 2011 Report Share Posted March 11, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... This article' date=' perchance? [/color'] The very one Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lonewalker Posted March 11, 2011 Report Share Posted March 11, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... A quick handful of quotes from teh Bunneh's Fantasy HERO campaign - Chronicles of Foxton. --- Lady Isobelle Hawthorne: Noblewoman and duelist from neighboring Shelinsibeau appointed Captain of the Baron's Guard. Takes her responsibilities very seriously. Quion Rake: Taciturn and emotionless (by choice) alchemist serving as records clerk to the Baron. Tortured by guilt over a perceived crime from the past. Wythri Majaera: Young Elf exiled from her homeland of Pasion and working as an apprentice sage in Foxton. Slightly mad due to the influence of her Wild Magik. Wallace Gunn: Humble and simple druid and woodsman hired on as the Baron's Forester. Slow-witted and uneducated but dedicated to his duty. Bri Leith: Boisterous and rough-and-tumble taleweaver from the realm of Kalon across the southern bay. Takes the same fervor to both the battlefield and the bedroom. --- Opening the session with the indomitable Captain Hawthorne making her way through the town... GM: The sunrise creeps up over the horizon... Quion (OOC): The sunrise has to creep because it noticed that Hawthorne is angry and it's scared. It's the truth... Bri: We don't just embrace crazy here - we buy it a drink and start french-kissing. During a description of Lady Hawthorne's duties in town... Hawthorne (OOC): Hawthorne keeps the peace. Wythri (OOC): Yeah, and it's a .45 Colt. Annoyed with Quion, Wythri drops him from the magical Mindlink... Quion: I believe I've been unFriended. Opening statement during an interrogation... Hawthorne: Let me put you at ease. You cannot run fast enough. Regarding one of the other players... Quion (OOC): He's like a onion with feet. During a discussion on Charisma/Presence and how much it relates to personality or just a nice set of bewbs... Gunn (OOC): It's really just theoretical charisma versus practical charisma. --- Enjoy! Lonewalker New Hero 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Mackinder Posted March 11, 2011 Report Share Posted March 11, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From a recent bout of my '7th Sea' campaign. It is said that one picture is worth a thousand words, and a GM's summing up comes close: GM (Me): "Ohhhkay then. You infiltrate the Evil Overlord's fortress, and just happen to desecrate his Sacred Firepit with a barrel of ultra-rancid lard you had handy. In the middle of the ensuing confrontation, you body-check the OL into said Firepit. On the way out, you blow up part of his fortress and steal his personal yacht. So the answers to both of your questions are Yes. He does remember you guys, and he does bear a grudge." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Manic Typist Posted March 11, 2011 Report Share Posted March 11, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... This article' date=' perchance? [/color'] "This brings up the first issue I have with D&D: There is no hope for you if you exist in this world. Nothing can be trusted. If the game master wants to kill you, you're dead. Think I'm exaggerating? Wait until I show you the monster that kills you by becoming your pants and tricking you into putting them on." They answered their own question - carnivorous architecture and clothing would be a bit conspicuous before they were any sentient beings around to produce them Although you do have to wonder at the mad genius of whoever bred the original Gelatinous Cube, presumably to clean up rubbish and corpses from 10-by-10 corridors. Then of course, you have mad geniuses like Ian, in the hands of whom a Cube is a deathtrap for even well equipped parties if they aren't clinically paranoid. But then Ian's sorcerers are the kind of people who polymorph Beholders into chickens, and vice versa, for fun. Are there stories here worth telling? Of the featureless corridor killings and the devious usage of gelatinous cubes? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drhoz Posted March 11, 2011 Report Share Posted March 11, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Are there stories here worth telling? Of the featureless corridor killings and the devious usage of gelatinous cubes? Well, I'll tell you one. Party, already paranoid, but not paranoid enough, peer cautiously around a corridor. At the far end, a sword is hanging in mid-air, glowing faintly. They withdraw to consult, decide it's some sort of ghost guardian, and elect to rush it en masse. It's not a ghost. It's a gelatinous cube that ate a guy with a magic sword, earlier. Scratch half the party. Ian's Pit Traps with Gelatinous Cubes are fun too. "Hey, a soft landing! Hang about, why can't I move. Or talk? Oh, ****." "Hang in there, we'll throw a line down to you! Grab the end! He's not grabbing the end. We're coming down for you!" New Hero 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matt Holck Posted March 11, 2011 Report Share Posted March 11, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Beast Do you think he can make a hippogriff ? discussing the genetic genius villain Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ockham's Spoon Posted March 11, 2011 Report Share Posted March 11, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Yeah, D&D never let plausibility get in the way of a good method for killing PCs. I once had a fighter who was the last of the party (which totaled 20 including henchmen at the onset) trying to retrieve a magical gewgaw from one of those classic dungeons that was a maze of traps and monsters will little discernable purpose other than killing adventurers. He has the gewgaw and was 50 feet from the exit when he was vacuumed up by a gelatinous cube on a random monster encounter. So close... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karmakaze Posted March 11, 2011 Report Share Posted March 11, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Although you do have to wonder at the mad genius of whoever bred the original Gelatinous Cube' date=' presumably to clean up rubbish and corpses from 10-by-10 corridors. Then of course, you have mad geniuses like Ian, in the hands of whom a Cube is a deathtrap for even well equipped parties if they aren't clinically paranoid.[/quote'] Given the number of 10x10 corridors, presumably he'd also developed a Tunneling Cube of some sort, and those have all been killed off. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghost-angel Posted March 11, 2011 Report Share Posted March 11, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... A quick handful of quotes from teh Bunneh's Fantasy HERO campaign - Chronicles of Foxton. --- Lady Isobelle Hawthorne: Noblewoman and duelist from neighboring Shelinsibeau appointed Captain of the Baron's Guard. Takes her responsibilities very seriously. Quion Rake: Taciturn and emotionless (by choice) alchemist serving as records clerk to the Baron. Tortured by guilt over a perceived crime from the past. Wythri Majaera: Young Elf exiled from her homeland of Pasion and working as an apprentice sage in Foxton. Slightly mad due to the influence of her Wild Magik. Wallace Gunn: Humble and simple druid and woodsman hired on as the Baron's Forester. Slow-witted and uneducated but dedicated to his duty. Bri Leith: Boisterous and rough-and-tumble taleweaver from the realm of Kalon across the southern bay. Takes the same fervor to both the battlefield and the bedroom. Opening statement during an interrogation... Hawthorne: Let me put you at ease. You cannot run fast enough. Questioning. Damien interrogates, Hawthorne questions. She's very polite about it too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted March 12, 2011 Report Share Posted March 12, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Questioning. Damien interrogates' date=' Hawthorne questions. She's very polite about it too.[/quote'] The best in-game interrogation line I ever heard was from someone else's game. It was 3rd Edition D&D, Forgotten Realms, with a good cleric of Kelemvor - God of Death and the Dead. That fact alone was enough to scare most peasantry spitless. So when there was one fellow they needed to get information out of, but who was proving reluctant to share, he cleric simply cradled his holy symbol and said, "You know, in a zone of silence, nobody can hear you scream." My understanding was that if the player had rolled any higher, the poor guy would have died from fright. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Mackinder Posted March 12, 2011 Report Share Posted March 12, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Reminds me of another recent thing in my '7th Sea' campaign. Some of the PCs are visiting an isolated Cathayan monastery. One that has been containing a Great Evil for centuries - though naturally the PCs do not find this out until they arrive in the middle of it all going seriously sideways. Rumours of monsters in the countryside, mysterious disappearances, the monastery itself seemingly deserted, dark clouds and lightning, loads of bad vibes and general foreboding, you name it. Anyhow, whilst putting all the pieces togather, they capture the Evil Cultist mostly responsible for starting this mess, and try to interrogate him. One of the characters has Sidhe Blood (with some Glamour magic) and her Player stacks up a whole bunch of effects and modifiers to be EXTRA intimidating. Rolls an absurdly high figure. I roll behind my screen for the Evil Cultist.... Yep, you guessed it. I roll an absurdly LOW figure. Have to think on it for a few seconds. Final result: The EC immediately loses all control of certain bodily functions, and starts screaming very loudly and continuously (kind of a 'circular breathing' thing, like when playing the bagpipes or the didgeridoo). Obviously, the intimidation effect was a little too effective, because all the prisoner will do now is just scream. (Fortunately for the PCs, if just from a Kharmic point of view, he totally deserved this and more.) Says the PC responsible (mingled regret, surprise and just a little pride) - "I BROKE him...". They eventually have to knock the prisoner unconscious just to shut him up, and leave him while they check things out. Along come a couple of OTHER PCs. These Characters arrived later and were trying to catch up with their friends. So, they stealthily enter this deserted monastery, find a tied-up unconscious stranger, and naturally try to wake him for questioning. The immediate response is screams, screams and more screams (the short sleep had NOT helped the prisoner's mind at all). Very disconcerting for the new arrivals, but it did serve to reunite the party very quickly, since all that noise alerted the other PCs (and a few other people besides :evilgrin: ) . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drhoz Posted March 13, 2011 Report Share Posted March 13, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Yeah' date=' D&D never let plausibility get in the way of a good method for killing PCs. I once had a fighter who was the last of the party (which totaled 20 including henchmen at the onset) trying to retrieve a magical gewgaw from one of those classic dungeons that was a maze of traps and monsters will little discernable purpose other than killing adventurers. [/quote'] Don't knock the deathtrap dungeon. They're a great way to weaken a party before you move in to deliver the coup de grace. One of Ian's characters on an online game started a bandit kingdom that soon became a major headache to everybody else on the server. Eventually, after he and his underlings got bored with humiliating and bankrupting everybody that tried to go in after them, he announced that a major artifact was available for anybody willing to risk the Labyrinth he had set up. There was quite a large crowd that showed up to give it a go, and having hacked their way in and found the artefact and the survivors were fighting their way out again, commented "You know, that wasn't as hard as I was expecting." whereupon they discovered Ian's character and his entire army of brigands grinning and waiting for them at the gate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
matrix3 Posted March 13, 2011 Report Share Posted March 13, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Don't knock the deathtrap dungeon. They're a great way to weaken a party before you move in to deliver the coup de grace. One of Ian's characters on an online game started a bandit kingdom that soon became a major headache to everybody else on the server. Eventually, after he and his underlings got bored with humiliating and bankrupting everybody that tried to go in after them, he announced that a major artifact was available for anybody willing to risk the Labyrinth he had set up. There was quite a large crowd that showed up to give it a go, and having hacked their way in and found the artefact and the survivors were fighting their way out again, commented "You know, that wasn't as hard as I was expecting." whereupon they discovered Ian's character and his entire army of brigands grinning and waiting for them at the gate. Sounds cool, if aggravating to the unsuspecting. What game was this that he was able to set all this up? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drhoz Posted March 13, 2011 Report Share Posted March 13, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Sounds cool' date=' if aggravating to the unsuspecting. What game was this that he was able to set all this up?[/quote'] One of the multiple Neverwinter servers he terrorised, if I recall correctly. I'll check. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drhoz Posted March 13, 2011 Report Share Posted March 13, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Once again I didn't get to run Instruments Yet Stranger, because all the groups at the guild yesterday were crowded into a single room, and me running a variety of strange and disturbing music - all of it essential to the campaign - for my players wouldn't have gone down well. *sigh* I suspect I'm going to have to just write the speakeasy scene up as an email and include mp3s of the tunes. Happily, I'd also prepared handouts for two other potential adventures in advance, so I ran The Pale God from Great Old Ones instead. Spoilers ahead. But that didn't start until after the players and I sorted out who had what book, and who had read which. The McGinty Travelling Library have stolen so many interesting tomes over the years that the collection is becoming somewhat unmanageable, and reading them a full-time pursuit, especially since I exploded the number available with crates of other books that might be Mythos-related, but usually turn out to be occult arse-gravy of the weakest kind. They might get around to the Book of Eibon one day, but they've got Basil Valentine : His Triumphant Chariot of Antimony, and A History of Freemasonry to slog through first. McGinty's Player : Do , Do, Do, The Funky Eibon ( ) Rondale & The Amazing Julius want to start a Foundation to secretly fight the Mythos, but further complications arose with the number of artefacts McGinty has acquired - why lie, stole - and jealously hordes. He's the only surviving party member that knows about some of them. The list includes items in all three of Rondale & Guiliano's categories - 'Interesting', 'Dangerous' and ' DDH' - the latter being 'find a Deep Dark Hole and hope it never sees the light of day again'. McGinty and Rondale are out of town at the start of the adventure, driving back to Arkham after picking up McGinty new custom-built Dusenberg Model J. The night is dark and stormy, rain is pouring down in buckets, the road ahead nearly invisible. A discussion about the need for some sort of reflectors set into the road arises. Rondale OOC : But not if McGinty is involved. We don't want him going around decapitating cats and sticking their heads into the asphalt. GM : No. McGinty goes around decapitating cats for entirely different reasons. Although it would make directions interesting. GM : 'Turn left at the tortoiseshell' Arriving back at the business, they park the cars meet up with Givetti ( fresh out of hospital ) and head across the road to the house McGinty continues to claim as his own for no legal reason. Where they discover the phone has been ringing all evening, by somebody begging desperately for their help. Tooling up, they set off for the town square, where a dishevelled, rain-soaked and deathly pale figure is waiting. He's clearly not well, and he's about to get worse. The man staggers towards them, begging them "go to the house of the worm... destroy it!" and collapses screaming and convulsing. As Givetti and Rondale run forward to help, he splits open from temple to crotch, and thousands upon thousands of tiny white creatures like pus with spider's legs, pour out of the gaping but bloodless wound. Givetti, unsurprisingly, goes bug**** insane, and empties his pistol into the streaming mass, and flings the empty gun into the remains. Rondale, on the other hand, empties incendiary rounds into the heap. McGinty, on the other hand, is running around trying to catch one of the creatures in a bottle. Then they spend a few minutes line dancing on the bugs, trying to crush as many as possible before they can crawl and swim away through the puddles. Gingerly picking through the smoking remains, they find an unused postcard from the Hotel Miskatonic, McGinty's phone number, a wallet with the victim's name, address, and money, and a room key. They then head back to McGinty's truck, before realising they probably shouldn't leave the corpse there for the gardeners to discover, especially given all the evidence they left on the scene. GM : All those silver bullets are going to make an interesting addition to an already noteworthy autopsy. The Amazing Julius : And I've got to find my gun! It's a registered firearm! GM : Yup. You'll find it in the chest cavity, where you threw it Corpse disposal is required. Bagging up the remains, Rondale and McGinty drag the corpse back to the truck, despite Givetti's mental state, and Rondale stands guard ready to squash any more of the bugs that might emerge. GM : Bad corpse! Stop! Scaring! Smithers! Rondale : I've got a bayonet with a shotgun on the end of it. McGinty : Anyone you kill in this life becomes your servant in the next one - isn't that how it works? Some argument arises about where to take the corpse. Eventually Givetti is forced to pay McGinty to take the remains back to the auto repair shop. Givetti acquiesces - it's the kind of thing his Family have to do all the time anyway. GM : You don't mind them storing corpses on your property as long as they pay for the privilege. The corpse is stuffed into an oil-drum along with a pile of half-bricks, and dumped in the Miskatonic before dawn. But all this running around in the rain, and coming downstairs in the morning to find Bob the Pus-Spider running around in his bottle on the breakfast table, and faced with runny eggs on top of the memories from the night before, does The Amazing Julius no good at all and he is promptly hospitalised for something that soon becomes pneumonia. The Amazing Julius's player : I meet one guy, go raving insane, and spend the next week in hospital at death's door. I finally feel like I'm playing Cthulhu. Rondale & McGinty continue their investigations without him. This includes McGinty hiring the penthouse suite at the Hotel Miskatonic so they can ransack a room downstairs, a visit to a very dodgy attorney, and getting the royal tour of a Boston asylum whilst Rondale attempts to interrogate a woman who's been catatonic for 30 years. They manage the later by claiming McGinty is there investigating things to fund when he becomes Governor. The director of the institute of course falls over backwards to assist, and promises that all his staff will vote for him too. GM : Why limit it to the staff? There's plenty of inmates too. McGinty - The Candidate That 9 Out Of 10 Lunatics Support. Finally exhibiting some understandable caution, Rondale and McGinty refuse to enter the house in question, and limit their first visit to exploring the grounds. This uncovers an assortment of human remains, and they decide that calling in the cops would be a good idea at this point. Let them go in the house first. GM : Yes, those Boston police really love you these days, don't they... A reporter turns up as well, as the police and coroner are loading the last few baskets into their police truck. Alas, McGinty and Co. neglect to ask which paper he works for - it turns out to be the one that turned against McGinty the moment he revealed his political leanings. Leading to this headline the next day : Gubernatorial Candidate Knee-Deep In Corpses McGinty Uncovers Further Carnage At Death House And further complicating their investigation of the house because now there are small crowds of curious onlookers hanging around. With Givetti back on his feet they sneak in late at night, and rig up the house to explode with a combination of diesel, dynamite, and a timed detonator. Why risk exploring the house when you can blow it to bits instead? McGinty's experience as a army sapper should prove useful here. Indeed, his happy explanations about the history of sapping and the use of decomposing pig carcases, when they return to their hotel, puts Givetti off the breakfast bacon as WELL as the eggs. They anticipate headlines about the explosion in the morning paper. But there aren't any. And sneaking in again the next night shows that somebody somehow got into the house and removed the timer. McGinty resets the bomb, this time to explode if anybody interferes with the detonator, and they retreat again. Still nothing. Now quite irritated, McGinty sneaks back in AGAIN, during the day, whilst Rondale and Givetti distract the morbid thrill-seekers, and sets up the house to explode if anybody even opens the doors. And falls out a window making his escape. They go to leave, and realise one of the drawbacks of their scheme when the attorney shows up trying to find the missing tenant and the keys McGinty still hasn't returned. To stop him going into the house and blowing himself and the tourists sky-high, McGinty pays him off ( all that money in the dead man's wallet is proving handy ) and they go back the hotel confident that there is now no way any mysterious persons could get in or out of the house without being blown to bits. Which may well be the case, but the house is STILL intact the next morning. Whereupon they decide "Screw subtle", drive up before dawn, smash a window, throw a bundle of dynamite with a long fuse into the basement, and flee. In the rear-view mirror the house goes up in a pillar of flame, and they head back to Arkham happy with a job well done. Until the newspapers the next day describing the event also mention the huge trapdoor exposed by the explosion, and the intention of the Boston Police to investigate as soon as the rubble has been cleared away.... TO BE CONTINUED Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drhoz Posted March 13, 2011 Report Share Posted March 13, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... An aside from Cthulhu I don't recall if I posted Me : McGinty can't become President, but he can certainly become Governor McGinty's player : And annoying. Me : That goes without saying. D&D 4th Ed GM : If they get your Dragonborn you'll be down to a thief, one wizard and a Druid. Rumbaba : An *awesome* thief. And I'm not a thief! Tarmikos : And an awesome wizard. Adrie : And an awesome Druid. Session interrupted by collection of attendance fees Arjhan Dragonborn's player to Treasurer: So, I get ticked off & you go away? Rumbaba : When you put the posters up for execution, bear in mind the necromancer's nose didn't use to be that flat. And his skull wasn't concave. GM : Unlike the bronze-coloured halfling. Tarmikos : Kobold. Rumbaba : Just because they're the same size doesn't mean they're the same species. GM : I keep getting the small, annoying races confused. GM : It's a dark and stormy night, the rain comes down in waves, and the moon turns blood-red. Rumbaba : Is that a good omen, a bad omen, or just general omeny? Adrie : I hate getting rained on. Rumbaba : Wet dog smell. GM : You cross open land in bad weather, at night, against brigands, without your Tank. Rumbaba : Our rainwater tank. Rumbaba : Normally, if I'm sneaking around a house hoping I don't get caught, it's because the husband came home unexpectedly GM : This closet contains only clothes, sheets, and underthings. Rumbaba : Well this was a bust *puts bra back on hook* GM : "Mummy, there's a monster under my bed!" "Kill it, you need the XP" Arjhan : I'm a sorcerer Tarmikos : And I'm handy with a blade Rumbaba : And the Druid just has permanent PMS Rumbaba, searching upstairs, hides under the parents bed, something he regrets when the children sneak in to bounce on it. The mother, down in the kitchen, hammers on the ceiling with a broom, in response to the thumping. GM : It occurs to you, Arjhan, that it might not be kids bouncing on the bed Arjhan : But why would the goblin be bouncing on a bed? Rumbaba : Guess. GM : I don't know what you're complaining about, you've had to hide under beds before. Rumbaba : Yes, but on those occasions what I was doing *before* I had to hide was more fun. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Manic Typist Posted March 14, 2011 Report Share Posted March 14, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... One of the multiple Neverwinter servers he terrorised' date=' if I recall correctly. I'll check.[/quote'] Neverwinter severs? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drhoz Posted March 14, 2011 Report Share Posted March 14, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Neverwinter severs? Neverwinter Nights, sorry. It helped that the GMs for the servers thought that Ian's antics were entertaining enough that they backed up even his most ghastly of schemes. Of course, few of them imagined just how spectacularly successful those schemes could be. Like blowing up the entire town of Haven on three separate occasions, and on one of those occasions proved beyond any shadow of a doubt to be at the far end of the map at the time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shadow Hawk Posted March 14, 2011 Report Share Posted March 14, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... 4th ed DnD Sora, Dragonborn Fighter (and my 12 year old son) Thorfin, Dwarven Paladin (Me) Varus, Elven Rogue (and my oldest friend) Raiden, Tiefling Rogue (and my friend's 18 year old son) Asterix, Gnome Hexblade Zach, Eladrin Wizard (and 19 year old Marine) Trying to recruit the new rogue Raiden: How do I know I can trust you? Varus: Haven't you heard of honor among thieves? Asterix: Now that you mention it, no. Thorfin: There's a good reason for that. Argueing over marching order Sora: Fighters go first. Raiden: What if there are traps? Sora: Who would trap a abandoned mine? Raiden: Lots of people! Thorfin: So, they mined the mine? We return to town Asterix: I got a new girlfriend. Thorfin: You hit more girls then you do monsters. Asterix: I'm a lover, not a fighter. We try to keep the G rating Asterix: This is family entertainment, not entertainment for making families. Asterix gets angry... Sora (sung): Gnome, gnome in a rage... New Hero 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FrankL Posted March 14, 2011 Report Share Posted March 14, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... I finally feel like I'm playing Cthulhu. I've got that feeling at work. I just took a new job as a web developer and my predecessor (whose code I have inherited) was completely unaware of the concepts of Code Cleanup or refactoring or even putting common code in libraries. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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