Tim Posted March 6, 2006 Report Share Posted March 6, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From my game Saturday night. I'll leave this one out of context. It is just as funny: 1st player: "You need "Handle Animal" and "Use Rope" if you want to be a true letch." 2nd player: "Why?" 3rd player: "Hereee Sheepy, Sheepy. Here Sheepy, Sheepy." Later: In a small crowded room one fighter was standing behind another one. Wanting to get into the fight, he shouted "Make a hole. Make a hole." 1/2 Drow: (about Sun Elf) "We are not talking about the Brain-dead elf." Sun Elf: "If we were, we'd be talking about you." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghost-angel Posted March 6, 2006 Report Share Posted March 6, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From tonights game... "How do they know where we're always having lunch!?" "Maybe you should stop making reservations." -- player 1:"I'm going to get her some food before she gets out of hand." player 2:"She just ate a demon." player 3:"Yeah, but one hour later you're hungry again." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gewing Posted March 6, 2006 Report Share Posted March 6, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From tonights game... "How do they know where we're always having lunch!?" "Maybe you should stop making reservations." -- player 1:"I'm going to get her some food before she gets out of hand." player 2:"She just ate a demon." player 3:"Yeah, but one hour later you're hungry again." ate a demon... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Terrapin Posted March 6, 2006 Report Share Posted March 6, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Situation: The PCs are helping Kodiac, who has been wrongfully suspended. Their next move is for Shasta to go into a henchmen dive incognito and troll for information. KODIAC: She'll need close-in backup. That's a rough crowd. SUN WALKER: Shasta can take care of herself, believe us. KODIAC: She can? I thought she was some sort of science-created flower dryad. WITCH HAZEL: She is, but she's also sort of a Were-Whomping-Willow. SHASTA: Yes. Don't make me hasty. You wouldn't like me when I'm hasty. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghost-angel Posted March 6, 2006 Report Share Posted March 6, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... ate a demon... The character in question is a shapeshifting brick. One of her forms is a 30 ft werewolf in a near permanent stage of rage. We were fighting giant horseheaded demons, one of which she managed to knock out, right before all the others fled due to a well played PRE Attack on the part of another PC. The shapeshifter ate half the demon before being calmed down and she managed to have the presence of mind to revery forms to something less hostile. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JK Moni Swift Posted March 7, 2006 Report Share Posted March 7, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Ok I have two quotes. One: One of my friends was playing a god. And the GM (my beloved) had us fighting this aliens that grab the god up and was trying to eat him, well we defeated the alien before the god was eaten. He was spit out and coverd in green slime and he busts out with, "Great I am somebodys snoot rocket." Two: My beloved has a brick that is 8' tall and 5' wide. He was fighting a greater demon and he grab it then twisted his head off saying, "Mom had a baby and its head poped off." There you go for now until later. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Black Omega Posted March 7, 2006 Report Share Posted March 7, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... This last battle our kung fu swordsman had the worst run of luck. Fighting a basic thug he managed to hit the guy in the foot, hand, arm, left and thigh without ever even coming close to something vital. Finally the thug just held up his hands and yelled "For the love of all that's unholy, I give up, just quit poking me!" When it comes time to question him, all the swordsman will need to do is put his hand on the hilt of his sword and the thug will tell them everything. tkdguy 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gewing Posted March 8, 2006 Report Share Posted March 8, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... The character in question is a shapeshifting brick. One of her forms is a 30 ft werewolf in a near permanent stage of rage. We were fighting giant horseheaded demons' date=' one of which she managed to knock out, right before all the others fled due to a well played PRE Attack on the part of another PC. The shapeshifter ate half the demon before being calmed down and she managed to have the presence of mind to revery forms to something less hostile.[/quote'] Do they taste like chicken? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghost-angel Posted March 8, 2006 Report Share Posted March 8, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Do they taste like chicken? This one tasted like horsemeat (It was a minataur type thing using a horses heads instead of a bulls.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Manic Typist Posted March 8, 2006 Report Share Posted March 8, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... My fantasy group is plane hopping, and to make up for a minor transgression by one of my party members (apparently attacking the giant spider covered in plate mail wasn't a great idea) we had to do a minor task. It was actually remarkably easy. We went and fetched some giant rubies out of a crack that was too small for the spiders. However, later, we learned that these rubies were in fact the deposited fertilization element that the "Mother" spiders needed to consume to lay a clutch of eggs. Upon which I said... "You guys realize we've found the motherload, right?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrosshairCollie Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... "No, we're not the Keystone Kops. We're not that COMPETENT." Stacey, after rolling 10 damage on 5d6: "That ... really ... sucks!" Me: "Welcome to Chris's world." (who, previously, rolled 8 damage on 1d12+2d6 and may well be the single unluckiest die-roller I have ever met in my entire life.) "First it was a Jump check. Then it was a Climb check. Now, it's a Balance check. This dungeon HATES me ... just have me make a Move Silently check, come on, it's only a matter of time. Come on, I DARE you!" --Jeff, playing a Paladin in full armored regalia and no training in the aforementioned skills. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Major Freedom Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... I think the best I have seen was a group playing Teenage Supers with a coupld of players who had played Hero System for as long as it had been out. The two "Experienced" players go after a group of "Normal" Bank robbers in a car. The flying brick states "I'm going to fly down grab the back bumper and the rear tire well and lift the rear axle off the ground" fumbles his rolls, and fumbles his breakfall rolls while impacting with the ground. Meanwhile the other "Experienced" player states "I'm throwing my shield into the left front tire to lock it up" not realizing the dynamics of how a car would turn once that tire locked up. Makes the throw, tire locks up, car skids sideways, player fumbles his combat driving roll, then fumbles breakfall roll. Both Super "Experienced" players get up looking like road pizza, look at the teens and state in stereo "And if we ever see you do this, you'll be off this team so fast your head will swim" Terrapin and Kirby 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egyptoid Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... What is the Pennisc War? A LARP thing or something? he left out the lifestyle part. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egyptoid Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... 3 weeks ago the team speedster (off alone) gets ambushed by an armored weirdo. all the players were there and heard the description of the bad guys and the fight. This week a group of armored wierdoes ambushes the hero team. same armor, same m.o. so the Team mentalist asks speedster: "Oh that ambush really happened?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silbeg Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Shawn, "'Cause Jack is not a dumbass!" Jack, who is not paying attention to the conversation, 'What?" Shawn, 'Cause Jack is not a complete dumbass!" *sigh* ghost-angel 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dartnet Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From the Rifts game Monday: What kind of genius eats a box of 500 year old twinkles? From Cyberpunk last night: The priest can’t kill anybody. Yea but the bible is very fuzzy on knee caps. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greymankle Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From Secret Worlds: (Two characters meeting and talking in the rain in Cambodia) Ryu: Did you bring me any dry clothes? Damien: Yeah , I got a ton of 9mm dry socks. Korvar 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
James Gillen Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Tonight's D&D: DM: "The Steward's closet contains an ornate cloak in red and gold thread." Don: "Looks neat. Might be magical. I'll claim it." Matt: "Don, you're the Ranger. You're gonna be sneaking through the grasslands and the Orcs are going to look and go, "Ooh, it's Liberace!" -- Gary: "Scorpion venom? That's something my Rogue could use!" Don: "Dude, didn't you just change your Rogue's alignment to Neutral Good?" Gary: "Well, there are still reasons a good character could use poison. Like to get rid of evil guys." Matt: "Thank you, George Bush." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Terrapin Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From our Champions campaign: The situation: Hummingbird has approached the PCs, at normal size, to parley. She claims that her teammates are out of the country, and she’s being stalked by Freakshow. The heroes are understandably wary; none of them are mentalists, and none would have an easy time hitting Hummingbird or resisting her Mental Powers if she shrinks. Witch Hazel whips out a potion phial. Witch Hazel: “This is Instant Bat Juice. I uncork this, or drop it, and 750 common black bats will swarm out. They have no rational mind for you to affect, as they are little more than very fast, agile, hungry insectivores intent on gobbling up any moving thing smaller than themselves. Do you understand this?” Hummingbird: *puts up hands* “You had me at ‘bats’.” Later… Orca: “’Instant Bat Juice’? Good one, Hazel. Out of curiosity, what was in that phial?” Witch Hazel: “Instant Bat Juice.” Orca: “You actually carry around a phial of Instant Bat Juice?” Witch Hazel: *shrugs* “Well, you never know, do you?” Sun Walker: *smiles and shakes head* “Now that’s totally witchin’.” Later…Hummingbird and Witch Hazel are having a private conversation about fears. Hummingbird: “I suppose you think I should just, like, build a bridge and get over myself, right?” Witch Hazel: “I imagine you could just ford across. You’re pretty shallow.” End of session, Freakshow is downed and bound and Renegade has him Covered, waiting for the authorities… Freakshow: “I’ll get you for this! You’ll never see me coming!” Renegade: “True. I can’t see you coming with your bag of knives, and you can’t see me coming in my battlesuit.” Freakshow: “Just remember, hero…you have to sleep sometime.” Renegade: “I’ve been trained not to sleep.” [Note: This is true.] Freakshow: “Man, you are just creepy. And not in a good way.” TheTemplar, transmetahuman, Koshka and 2 others 4 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ParagonAlpha Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... So one of the guys in my group (who has a passing resemblance to the drummer of the Beatles) can never be happy with playing a normal character, he has to be the best of the best. During a session of the greatest Legend of the Five Rings, I have ever seen, he decides to do some impossiblly stupid and incredibly heroic strength feat. His difficulty is damn near impossible on the dice he has. The player looks at the dice on the table, closes his eyes, inhales and slowly exhales, and picks up the dice. Other Player: Ringo, did you just focus your dice chi? I laughed so hard pain came. TheTemplar and Koshka 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Anomaly Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From our long-running Champions game: "Now Dr. A, let me go over this again, because I'm sure I'm missing something somewhere, okay?" Dr. Anomaly: "Go ahead." "First off, Kathleen [Enigma] is the woman of your dreams, and you're deeply in love with her." Dr. Anomaly: "Correct." "Second, she's in love with you, and has been for years, but has been afraid to say anything, at least until recently." Dr. Anomaly: "That does seem to be the case, yes." "Okay, now to the part I'm sure I'm screwing up. The two of you are in your bedroom, and Kathleen's planning on spending the night there..." Dr. Anomaly: "That was her intention, and I certainly was not objecting." "So...the woman of your dreams is going to spend the night in your bedroom...in your bed...and what the two of you end up doing isn't the 'obvious', but instead spend most of the night writing physics equations and chemical formulas on a blackboard and start assembling a list of components, equipment, and supplies?!?" Dr. Anomaly: "Well, neither of us sleep more than a few hours a night, and there is a new lab we've been considering putting together once we're back home in Millennium City, so it seemed to both of us like an opportune time to..." (heavy sigh) "Geeks...superpowered geeks...in love." Koshka 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egyptoid Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... from Fantasy Hero: Phixus is a large dim-witted draconian fiend with teleport powers. Hrundig is a viking outdoorsman. Last week Phixus ate their horses. [bAMF] Phixus: Hi guys, whaz-zup? Hrundig: oh lord not again. Phixus: didja guys get your horses back ? Hrundig: no, now go away ! Phixus: why I like you guys Hrundig: Do you know how you do things, crazy things, and then don't remember them? Phixus: yeah sometimes, I guess Hrundig: Do you know Odin ? Phixus: well not closely. but I been to Valhalla before. Hrundig: You know how he's got that eye patch ? Phixus: yeah, its cool. Hrundig: he doesnt wear it because it's cool ! Phixus: really? Hrundig: HE WEARS IT BECAUSE HE 'S ONLY GOT ONE EYE ! Phixus: really ? Hrundig: YES YOU NINCOMPOOP Phixus: why are you yelling at me ! Hrundig: Don't you know why he only has one eye? Phixus: no ! (scared) Hrundig: because you poked it out one time you clumsy oaf ! Phixus: no I didnt ! Hrundig: YES YOU DID Phixus: I did ? Hrundig: YES YOU DID Phixus: But How ? I'd never do that to Odin, he's cool and wise and stuff !! Hrundig: BUT THERE IT IS. Phixus: No. (weeping) No. I'd never mean to do that, I'm so sorry. Hrundig: You should apologize to him. Phixus: Bwaahhaahhaa abwahahhaah (sobbing) Hrundig: He's powerful, you should apologize to him. Quickly, before he curses you. Phixus: uhh, uhh, yeah. you're right. Yeah. Hrundig: A humble apology just might save your sorry skin. Phixus: Yeah ! Yeah ! they know me, they have to see it wasnt my fault ! Hrundig: It seems for the best, since he lost his eye and all. Phixus: Yeah ! [bAMF] Hrundig: Thank the gods he's gone. Jennavel the sorceress has been watching this whole exchange, wide-eyed. Jennavel: I don't know whether to applaud you or fear you. What an incredible manipulative bastard you've turned into. Hrundig: Well you don't eat a man's favorite horse. Jennavel: Phixus can teleport wherever he likes you know. Hrundig: So? Jennavel: He doesnt teleport to places, he teleports to people. If he wants to see Clyde, he justs poofs to where Clyde is, whether Clyde is in the bathroom, at work, or if Clyde has died and gone to Valhalla. Hrundig: Oh. Is that bad ? Jennavel: Could be. Normally one is not allowed to teleport to the hall of the gods. Hrundig: Can't you just see it though? Jennavel: What? Hrundig: Here's Phixus, galloping up the rainbow bridge, and Heimdall just cuts him down, yelling "Halt, Vile Intruder!" or something like that. Jennavel: So you want Phixus dead, eh ? Hrundig: do you know how much I paid for that horse? Jennavel: Remind me never to get in your way again. death tribble and TheTemplar 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigdamnhero Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Hrundig is a viking outdoorsman. As opposed to a viking indoorsman. (Commonly found in the Minnestota area, I'm told.) Funny exchange, BTW! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted March 11, 2006 Report Share Posted March 11, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From our long-running Champions game: (heavy sigh) "Geeks...superpowered geeks...in love." :rofl: That caused my sides to hurt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Anomaly Posted March 11, 2006 Report Share Posted March 11, 2006 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... "Okay, that's it...we're going to need a bigger dragon." ----- "Hey...just because I haven't died, then been brought back by some kind of lizard shaman and gotten superpowers as a result, doesn't mean my life isn't complicated!" ----- "Okay, I'm going to change forms to Hathor, wearing a FedEx uniform...as no FedEx uniform has ever been worn before!" ----- "And thus the main guns of the battleship Missouri are used to shoot down a mosquito." (referring to Hathor turning the full force of her attentions on a mere mortal.) ----- Dr. Anomaly's sister, Rebecca: "Come in and sit down, Solomon...or should I say, 'Dr. Anomaly'?" Dr. Anomaly: (stunned silence, followed by) "How...when...how long have you known? How did you find out?" Rebecca: "I've only known for a few minutes; I never had cause to probe your mind before, and never suspected my brother was more than the flake the popular press thinks he is. In hindsight, of course, it should have been obvious." Dr. Anomaly: "Waitaminute...my sister is a metanormal? Rebecca, when did this happen?!?" ----- Rebecca: "Honestly, Solomon, at this point, I think we should move any further discussion to my laboratory/HQ." (She flips a concealed switch and a bookcase slides aside, revealing a hidden staircase leading downward. A faint hum of some kind of esoteric power generator can be heard from below.) Kathleen: "Solomon, why doesn't our base have a secret laboratory like this?" Solomon: "Do you have any idea how difficult it is to try and remodel an indestructible, invulnerable building?" Haerandir, Tim and Basil 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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