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Darren Watts

Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

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Originally posted by Gannok

Well, seeing as how I have both Shodowfist and Magic cards, and I haven't played either in many years, it would be easy to get them confused. I was more concerned that they exsisted to begin with regardless of where they come from.

 

As an active Shadowfist player I consider it my duty to list all the monkey-related card names in that game:

 

King Kung

Battlechimp Potemkin

Furious George

Orango Tank

Chimpanzer

Che Gorilla

Gorilla Fighter

Apes of Wrath

Ba-BOOM

Funky Monkey

The Monkey Who Would Be King

Koko Chanel (Master of Monkey Style)

Flying Monkey Squad

Big Macaque Attack

Mo Monkeys Mo Problems

Monkey Boy

Too Much Monkey Business

Simian Liberation Army

SAM Simian

Simian Sneaker

Who's The Monkey Now?

Gorilla Warfare

Monkeywrenching

 

That's quite a few, now that I look at it. Ordinarily I consider the monkeys to be a small and silly minority in that game. Sadly there is as yet no card titled "Butt Monkey".

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I said it, but I didn't mean to.

In the Champs game we do I was NPCingan insane batman type guy. Who was hunting a villain called KillerClown.

 

"Its TIME TO DIET CLOWN! *CRAP!!!* I mean die, lousy Woolworths Script this stain looks like a T."

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King Kung

Battlechimp Potemkin

Furious George

Orango Tank

Chimpanzer

Che Gorilla

Gorilla Fighter

Apes of Wrath

Ba-BOOM

Funky Monkey

The Monkey Who Would Be King

Koko Chanel (Master of Monkey Style)

Flying Monkey Squad

Big Macaque Attack

Mo Monkeys Mo Problems

Monkey Boy

Too Much Monkey Business

Simian Liberation Army

SAM Simian

Simian Sneaker

Who's The Monkey Now?

Gorilla Warfare

Monkeywrenching

 

Chimp Shack

Monkey House

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Gaming quote for this week goes, unfortunately, to the GM of our D&D game.

 

Background: One of our PCs is a half-orc named Kel. She frequently (more frequently than the rest of us at least) laments the lack of willing partners for "romantic interludes." Last session, we were up against a cleric of Erythnul, the evil God of Slaughter, and his party members, one of whom was rumored to be a half-orc like Kel.

 

Ok, so, Kel walks into the now-empty tavern where the orc is and assesses him as a possible candidate for a romantic interlude. The GM's descripition of the orc's general ugliness and undesirability concluded with the phrase "this charming specimen of orchood."

 

I told him it would end up here. :)

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Actually, *I* thought the best part was the response to my line of "this charming specimen of orchood." I think it was DocMan who said...

 

"Now there's a set of words I never thought I'd ever see used in the same sentence."

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Originally posted by loki

OK here is one. In my gaming group I run the Grab and Squeeze brick named Pitbull who is VERY overconfident and a total smart a$$.

 

Pitbull grabs generic viper agent #1 and squeeze him into unconsciousness. He casually drops the agent and turns to the Super Villain that has been recruited to try and fight him off.

 

(Special thanks to the rapper Fifty Cent… how in the world did a Fifty Cent line make it into a champions game… don’t ask..):confused:

 

PB: “You’re like a pop tart sweetheartâ€

Villain: “Huh?â€

PB: “You’re soft in the middleâ€

Grab… squeeze… KO’D super baddie

 

I liked his line from this week's game.

 

"Go ahead and target ol' tall, dark and grabbed"

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Quote from an NPC that almost killed a player

 

We were playing a Teen Super hero game using the Ravenswood Academy. The PC's are all gathered around a pool party and one of the NPC's is trying to hit on another one.

 

NPC that is speaking is a Southern character, complete with drawl and everything . . .

 

In an attempt to hit on the character, he clears everone else away from the target love interest. First character he sends away is Prodigy and 9 year old super genious. Second one is a PC that get's sent off to talk to another charcter. Leaving him alone to work his magic (sorta . . . ) Said character is, rahter well endowed for her age and Fletch (the NPC in question) makes the mistake and breaks the plane. During the conversation, Prodigy comes back and he starts talking to her, allowing the other character to escape. As he's talking he turns around notices it's just them . . . which leads to the quote

 

"Damn it child . . . can't you see (see's Megan walking away) I'm goin' down in flames here?" I said that just as one of my players was taking a drink . . . I thought he was going to die.

 

WC

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he heh... drugs

 

Originally posted by MarkusDark

I liked his line from this week's game.

 

"Go ahead and target ol' tall, dark and grabbed"

 

Yeah... but i was on like 12 different kinds of meds for my cold... so it could have been the drugs talkin' :D

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In reference to how Michele takes forever to take her turn:

Mark: "I've finally figured it out. You see, Michele can do anything, it just takes forever!"

 

This was matched by the comment

Jim: "Can I buy Michele-Power?"

 

Or course one player had the very Yogi Berra like statement:

Paul: "You can't move any further than you can move."

 

But the best in-character comment went something like this...

Dr. Tellwilliker: (In a bad german accent) "I would like to take blood samples and test you to explore your powers and abilities."

Rodeo Clown: "I can tell ya what I can do. Ya don't gotta poke me with nothin'."

 

Okay, you had to be there. Timing is everything.

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In the first session of my new GAC, one of the players is the Patriot Ranger and he has a problem with needles as his origin involves medical experimentation. Two of the players are Doctor Phantom and Doc Turbo. As they met the man who would send them off to England to help the Brits battle the Axis threat and were introduced to one another, Patriot Ranger asked each of them something to the effect of, "Are you a real doctor?" :)

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My quote of the week, comes from a player outside of the game.

 

They were up against an ex good guy blaster named the Danish Bolt II.

 

After the rest of the players came up with their idea, on how to beat him.

 

I asked the player in particular what he was going to do, and he just started shouting ' I dont know What am I supposed to do again' at this point everyone kinda ignored him and then he kinda flipped 'No really someone has got to tell me what to do I have no idea'

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Since it had been a while since the last game, we decided to do a quick pick up game that only two of us and the GM could make. It was a Jadeclaw game and my character was trying to learn one of the secret schools of martial arts. We found a master and he sent us to deal with someone who was bothering him. The person bothering the master was one of the more powerful and supposedly evil races. After some roleplay discussion me and the other player had a little pow-wow.

 

"should we attack him?"

"I don't know, he's supposed to be evil"

"hmm, he doesn't seem evil, but we are supposed to 'deal' with him."

"Paper, rock scissors to decide?"

"Right, on three."

"Okay, you won so we attack him."

We turn to the GM, "We're ready."

"You decided by paper rock scissors?!?!"

"Yeah"

"Okay, he throws his sword at you."

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From a Werewolf: the Apocalypse game...

 

GM: "I'm not sure the rest of the Pack will want to contribute as heavily (toward establishing a Pack Totem) as you wish them to."

 

Me: "They will pay homage or they will pay the consequences."

 

From a Werewolf: the Wild West game...

 

GM: "...you are overconfident and arrogant."

 

Me: "It's only overconfidence if I fail. It's only arrogance if I'm not better than you."

 

From my first Vampire: the Dark Ages game and my first experience with White Wolf's games...

 

Me: "Let me get this straight. You want all of us to attack an army of literally hundreds of armed soldiers led by an ancient vampire of untold power and all we get is the five of us and a handful of militia?"

 

GM: "Yes..."

 

Me: "Die alone, suckers!" (my character proceeds to flee with all due haste, nobody ever said Vampire was a heroic game... you can only live forever if you don't get yourself killed!)

 

From a Champions game...

 

Friend: "Shrinking is the best power! My character's unhittable! I bet I can take out Adder (assassin with HKA+Poison attack) easy."

 

GM (playing Adder): "What's your Dex & Spd?"

 

Friend: "23 & 5" (grinning smugly)

 

GM: "Adder has a 24 & 6, so he'll go first" (rolls a 3)

 

Friend: "****!"

 

From that same Champions game...

 

Friend: (just came upon a group of villainous agents) "I've got a DCV of 20, there's no way he'll hit me! I'm going to walk through these guys..."

 

GM: "The first agent tosses a stun grenade."

 

Friend: "......." (that silence was worthy of any quote I've heard. Heheheheh)

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MorrowProject Game:

We planned our infiltration of the city for literally hours. We'd selected to enter the city via the river with scub gear. We'd studied the map, selected our targets and the order we would attack them in. We'd just finished summarizing the attack plan.

 

Player 1 (entirely serious): Ok, so what's the plan?

 

Group: -stunned silence-

 

Short time later....

 

GM: You're swimming quietly along the bottom of the river when you come to a wall.

 

Player 2: a what!?!

 

-group surfaces-

 

Player 2: Who put this dam here?

 

-2 hours planning our infiltration and no one noticed the dam on the map-

 

Altogether is was a good sign, we only won when things went really wrong.

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Great thread!

 

I'll add a contribution.

 

In some of our less than stellar moments, we have some Questions answered with a Question.

 

Our Bard, party leader, figuring out why the now-unconscious NPC mage was assaulted the previous night, speaking to our big, dumb Barbarian, played by a weight lifter: "You're a strength character, what do you fear?"

Barbarian: "STRENGTH!!!" (He was confident he knew that one!)

Bard: "He's a magic user, what does he fear?"

Barbarian, uncertain and looking a little confused: "Strength?"

The table howls, but the Bard, caught up in his own logic, angrily replies, "NO!!! MAGIC!!!!" Then he realizes what the barbarian said and joins the laughter...

 

Our martial arts 'hero' Shadowdragon, is infiltrating a bank that is in the hands of some robbers/terrorists/hostage-taking bad guys. Hidden, he hears machine gun fire, then sees a masked figure in body armor with a MAC-10 shooting the bad guys all around. On his legs, letters spell out "The Cure".

Shadowdragon has a very confused look, and another player asks rhetorically, "What's he curing, Shadowdragon?

Shadowdragon: "Life?"

Shadowdragon's tag line after a combat was usually, "I didn't take any stun..."

 

Finally, we have a player excited about his new flying character, SkyKnight. Meeting the group, he has a brief conversation with group leader, Enigma.

Enigma: "What do you do?"

SkyKnight: "I FLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Enigma, unimpressed: "What else?"

SkyKnight, taken aback and not expecting a follow-up question: "Fast????"

 

Regards,

 

Big Rich

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From last Saturday's D&D game:

 

Our party rides into a town on the way to the Baron's residence. I suggest we got to an Inn for lunch and to get information from the locals. One of the other players suggests:

 

"We should ask the Gown Tards about what's happened."

 

Doc

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PC's once enterd an inn and as they were sitting down they heard the snippits of conversation from the table behind them.

 

"No Troga! You cook elf over open flame! Boiling makes the meat rubbery."

 

Players got up and moved to another table.

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Actually, hiding behind the invisible guy is a great tactic. The enemy can see you, and shoot at you, but they hit him! Of course, this will kinda piss off the invisible guy...

 

And there's that pesky "See Invisible" power you have to buy, but otherwise, hey!

 

::considering creating an invisible brick character::

 

Doc

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Originally posted by Enforcer84

PC's once enterd an inn and as they were sitting down they heard the snippits of conversation from the table behind them.

 

"No Troga! You cook elf over open flame! Boiling makes the meat rubbery."

 

Players got up and moved to another table.

Ya know, I'm kinda frightened of that inn. I was talking this over with the DM and one player in our D&D game, and we were unsure exactly what type -- ok so what race -- of NPC would say this in public. Ogre? Orc? And furthermore, what inn would welcome that type when there are humans, elves, and other peaceful humanoids like gnomes and dwarves to serve ale to? I mean, really, if you were the barkeep, would you let an ogre in?

 

Just tell me where the inn is and I'll stay away from it forever, ok?

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It was owned by a half orc. He allowed anyone of any race in his bar as long as they behaved. Heads of those unable to comply with this bylaw adorned the inn. The players were ushered there by locals who sent all the potential trouble makers there.

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Originally posted by CrosshairCollie

I'm embarassed to say, this one's from me ...

 

"I'll hide behind the invisible guy."

 

That reminds me. A shadowrun game where everyone was running away from the big baddies. The Troll says "I'll pretend I'm a dumpster." Another character then tells me "I'll hide in the dumpster."

 

John Spencer

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