L. Marcus Posted September 7, 2015 Report Share Posted September 7, 2015 Boo! Hiss! tkdguy 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted September 7, 2015 Report Share Posted September 7, 2015 The advantage of browsing in two forums at once is being able to steal from one to post in the other. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted September 9, 2015 Report Share Posted September 9, 2015 Q: What's the difference between a riddle and a rhetorical question? Shadow Hawk and Logan D. Hurricanes 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bazza Posted September 10, 2015 Report Share Posted September 10, 2015 A: a rhetorical question has an answer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted September 14, 2015 Report Share Posted September 14, 2015 What do you call a fly without wings? A walk. Why did the cannibal refuse to eat the comedian? He tasted funny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted September 14, 2015 Report Share Posted September 14, 2015 A woman walked into a bar and said to the bartender, "Give me a double entendre." He gave her one. Burrito Boy 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bazza Posted September 14, 2015 Report Share Posted September 14, 2015 A woman walked into a bar and said to the bartender, "Give me a double entendre." He gave her one. Hope he gave her two. Pariah 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FrankL Posted September 14, 2015 Report Share Posted September 14, 2015 A woman walked into a bar and said to the bartender, "Give me a double entendre." He gave her one. Wondering if I should share the story from the cafeteria where I worked 16 years ago that actually fits in here.... Actually there's more than 1 from that place. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted September 14, 2015 Report Share Posted September 14, 2015 Wondering if I should share the story from the cafeteria where I worked 16 years ago that actually fits in here.... Actually there's more than 1 from that place. At this point, you can't not share it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FrankL Posted September 14, 2015 Report Share Posted September 14, 2015 I was working in the dish room and a friend came in. She was from India and had only been in the states for 2 years. She was a freshman in college. She also had poise and self confidence. Any room she walked into, she was the alpha female. (Full disclosure, I was smitten.) "Frank. You need to tell me something." That was her way of saying, "I have a question." "Sure." "They used a word in my English class that I'm not familiar with." "Shoot." "Double entendre." [blush] "Um, yeah. That's when you say something that has two meanings." "Like a pun?" "No. One meaning is innocent, the other is not." Puzzled look on her face. "You need to give me an example." Oh boy. Bear in mind that I had listened to the Bellamy Brothers just before coming to work. I said the first one that came to mind. "Ok. If I said you have a beautiful body, would you hold it against me." Eyes widen. Jaw drops. Head cocks to the side. She holds up one finger, about to say something. Turns around and walks out of the room. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted September 14, 2015 Report Share Posted September 14, 2015 Perfect example, if you ask me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roter Baron Posted September 14, 2015 Report Share Posted September 14, 2015 I don't get that joke. The meaning of "double entendre" is "Zweideutigkeit" - "two-meaningdom" would be the Anglo-Saxon word I just made up to get away from the Romantic bastardization of your formerly Germanic tongue. Big deal. A German one would be "Ich bin gut zu Vögeln" or "Ich bin gut zu vögeln". By changing the "V" into a "v" the sentences changes from "I am nice to birds" into "I am a nice f.....". A former girlfriend of mine liked to say that. But she lied: She wasn't particular nice to birds at all! Logan D. Hurricanes 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
L. Marcus Posted September 14, 2015 Report Share Posted September 14, 2015 Sagt die Tunfish zum Walfish: "Was zollen wir tuhn, fish?" "Du hast die Wahl, fish." Roter Baron 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted September 15, 2015 Report Share Posted September 15, 2015 I don't get that joke. The meaning of "double entendre" is "Zweideutigkeit" - "two-meaningdom" would be the Anglo-Saxon word I just made up to get away from the Romantic bastardization of your formerly Germanic tongue. Big deal. A German one would be "Ich bin gut zu Vögeln" or "Ich bin gut zu vögeln". By changing the "V" into a "v" the sentences changes from "I am nice to birds" into "I am a nice f.....". A former girlfriend of mine liked to say that. But she lied: She wasn't particular nice to birds at all! For Der Roter Baron's benefit. If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me ? Meaning 1. Innocent Would you be upset if I said you had a good body. Meaning 2. Rude. press your body against mine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roter Baron Posted September 16, 2015 Report Share Posted September 16, 2015 Yeah, got it. Know the song, too. I just do not find it particularly noteworthy or ... naughty. Nothing to blush about. (Do you "blush about" something?) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FrankL Posted September 16, 2015 Report Share Posted September 16, 2015 Yeah, got it. Know the song, too. I just do not find it particularly noteworthy or ... naughty. Nothing to blush about. (Do you "blush about" something?) Yes, "blush about" is perfectly acceptable English. "Blush over" would work as well. Would it help the humor to know that the time this took place, I was a seminary student and she was at the Bible college next door to the seminary. Also, I have always been quiet and had difficulty relating to the opposite sex and somewhere in my mind, when she said, "You need to give me an example," it translated as a hot gal saying "talk dirty to me, just a little." And the innocence of the asker... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bazza Posted September 17, 2015 Report Share Posted September 17, 2015 HC Marks on Twitter: I will never tire of a capella group name puns:Clef HangersAural FixationCompulsive LyresChordially YoursRansom NotesTEMPO TANTRUMS tkdguy and FrankL 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roter Baron Posted September 17, 2015 Report Share Posted September 17, 2015 Yes, "blush about" is perfectly acceptable English. "Blush over" would work as well. Would it help the humor to know that the time this took place, I was a seminary student and she was at the Bible college next door to the seminary. Also, I have always been quiet and had difficulty relating to the opposite sex and somewhere in my mind, when she said, "You need to give me an example," it translated as a hot gal saying "talk dirty to me, just a little." And the innocence of the asker... Okay, now I get it. Perfect! An opportunity well used. Pariah 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Narf the Mouse Posted September 18, 2015 Report Share Posted September 18, 2015 Why did Waldo cross the road? They'd found him again. How? How did they always keep finding him? He needed to get away, to escape! Logan D. Hurricanes and Lucius 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wcw43921 Posted September 20, 2015 Report Share Posted September 20, 2015 The Duck Bomb! death tribble 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted October 1, 2015 Report Share Posted October 1, 2015 C, E-flat, and G walked into a bar. The bartender took one look and said, "Get out. We don't serve minors in here." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dmjalund Posted October 1, 2015 Report Share Posted October 1, 2015 C, E-flat, and G walked into a bar. The bartender took one look and said, "Get out. We don't serve minors in here." ..on that note... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted October 1, 2015 Report Share Posted October 1, 2015 C, E-flat, and G walked into a bar. The bartender took one look and said, "Get out. We don't serve minors in here." ..on that note... Aaaw, man .... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted October 1, 2015 Report Share Posted October 1, 2015 C, E-flat, and G walked into a bar. The bartender took one look and said, "Get out. We don't serve minors in here." ...so E-flat left, and C and G had an open fifth between them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hermit Posted October 2, 2015 Report Share Posted October 2, 2015 There are two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither works. - Will Rogers Pariah, FrankL and Cancer 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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