dmcfarland Posted January 14, 2007 Report Share Posted January 14, 2007 Re: Top 10 List of the Lamest Superheroes of All Times I would have to say Flatman is one of the worst. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duke Bushido Posted January 14, 2007 Report Share Posted January 14, 2007 Re: Top 10 List of the Lamest Superheroes of All Times Now, were I writing Justice League, I would probably make him the King of the Seas in a fairly literal sense ... give him Hydrokinesis powers, so he can actually manipulate water. In his old series (pre-Superfriends, IIRC), he had the ability to create 'hard water spheres' and throw them as projectiles. Just a thought. Ooh! The pistol shrimp thing would be insanely effective as a ranged attack. At least underwater. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
casualplayer Posted January 14, 2007 Report Share Posted January 14, 2007 Re: Top 10 List of the Lamest Superheroes of All Times Ooh! The pistol shrimp thing would be insanely effective as a ranged attack. At least underwater. Animal Man, who can duplicate various animal's abilities, knocked out a whole bar full of Norwegian seaman using the pistol shrimp's attack. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duke Bushido Posted January 14, 2007 Report Share Posted January 14, 2007 Re: Top 10 List of the Lamest Superheroes of All Times I see. So what Aquaman _really_ needs is telepathic control over Animal Man! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McCoy Posted January 14, 2007 Report Share Posted January 14, 2007 Re: Top 10 List of the Lamest Superheroes of All Times I don't know if this makes him lamer or cooler' date=' but if Wikipedia's to be believed the two slugs are [i']his digestive system,[/i] which crawl back into his body to replenish his energy. Think Matter-Eater Lad as conceived by Berni Wrightson... Um, I thought they were his conjoined siblings. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
casualplayer Posted January 14, 2007 Report Share Posted January 14, 2007 Re: Top 10 List of the Lamest Superheroes of All Times Aquaman gets screwed by unimaginative writers. At the depths he can survive at he should be immensely strong and resilient to damage. In the thin air of the surface world he should move like John Carter on Mars. His senses are hyper-acute, probably enough so that Wolverine would slink away in shame. He was born and raised in a 3-dimensional environment so he should be a phenomenal pilot and tactician. And he is able to project his will onto others. Arthur rocks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
transmetahuman Posted January 14, 2007 Report Share Posted January 14, 2007 Re: Top 10 List of the Lamest Superheroes of All Times Aquaman gets screwed by unimaginative writers. At the depths he can survive at he should be immensely strong and resilient to damage. In the thin air of the surface world he should move like John Carter on Mars. ...or just explode... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brandi Posted January 14, 2007 Report Share Posted January 14, 2007 Re: Top 10 List of the Lamest Superheroes of All Times Um' date=' I thought they were his conjoined siblings.[/quote'] Maybe they are; I never heard of the guy outside of Wikipedia and I know it's not always reliable. Wikipedia entry on Maggott, for what it's worth. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brandi Posted January 14, 2007 Report Share Posted January 14, 2007 Re: Top 10 List of the Lamest Superheroes of All Times I would have to say Flatman is one of the worst. Do we want to include characters deliberately made to be lame/inept for comic effect though? Or is that you think he doesn't even work as a comedy character? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keithcurtis Posted January 15, 2007 Report Share Posted January 15, 2007 Re: Top 10 List of the Lamest Superheroes of All Times Aquaman gets screwed by unimaginative writers. At the depths he can survive at he should be immensely strong and resilient to damage. In the thin air of the surface world he should move like John Carter on Mars. His senses are hyper-acute' date=' probably enough so that Wolverine would slink away in shame. He was born and raised in a 3-dimensional environment so he should be a phenomenal pilot and tactician. And he is able to project his will onto others. Arthur rocks.[/quote'] I've never bought that explanation. Most deep sea creatures are pretty filmy, flimsy things that die long before you can get them to the surface. Make hims stronger, faster, whatever, that's fine. But don't use the "I can survive the bottom of the sea" excuse. Aquaman's retconned super strength and toughness are a by-product of the post-Silver Age, when comic book characters are far, far, far more dependent on fight scenes. Keith "I don't know you, so lets fight for six pages" Curtis Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
assault Posted January 15, 2007 Report Share Posted January 15, 2007 Re: Top 10 List of the Lamest Superheroes of All Times The saddest Aquaman story I ever read had him chasing one of his old enemies on land. He put a tank of water on the back of a truck so he could take his retinue of sea creatures with him. Topo the octopus turned out to be a very good archer - Aquaman had apparently taught him to use four bows at a time "years ago". On land. Ya gotta love this kind of stuff. Only a special kind of mind could have written it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duke Bushido Posted January 15, 2007 Report Share Posted January 15, 2007 Re: Top 10 List of the Lamest Superheroes of All Times Okay. I'm forced to admit it. My biggest beef with Aquaman has nothing to do wtih his powers, his writing, or his campiness/lameness. It is simply that he is off at the bottom of the ocean. The bottom of the ocean, fraught with villains and action and bank robberies and delicate hostage situations as we all know it to be, still just has no interest for me. I don't hold it against Aquaman, however. I hold it against all the really cool and interesting heroes and villains who simply refuse to set their nefarious schemes in motion at the bottom of the sea. There. I've said it. Ocean powers are boring. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OddHat Posted January 15, 2007 Report Share Posted January 15, 2007 Re: Top 10 List of the Lamest Superheroes of All Times Aquaman's retconned super strength and toughness are a by-product of the post-Silver Age, when comic book characters are far, far, far more dependent on fight scenes. Keith "I don't know you, so lets fight for six pages" Curtis Is that a retcon? It was my understanding from Denis Power's articles on the subject and Don Markstein's Toonopedia that Aquaman started out as a Sub-Mariner knock-off in 1941. Toonopedia only lists survival in the ocean and telepathic communication with sea life as powers, but Power stated that Aquaman also had super strength. That said, I haven't read the Golden Age Aquaman strips. So, the use of your comics fu would be appreciated. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keithcurtis Posted January 15, 2007 Report Share Posted January 15, 2007 Re: Top 10 List of the Lamest Superheroes of All Times From reading the old Aquaman stories as a kid, and the cartoon, all I remember is breathing underwater, swimming really, really fast, and commanding and talking to sealife. Most of his stories (like so much silver age - I can't really speak to golden age, since at the time I had no way of knowing what was new and what was a reprint), revolved around creatively solving problems using sea life. He was gimmicky. Keith "impressions and experience only, no claims are made to scholarly research" Curtis Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
assault Posted January 15, 2007 Report Share Posted January 15, 2007 Re: Top 10 List of the Lamest Superheroes of All Times Keith "impressions and experience only' date=' no claims are made to scholarly research" Curtis[/quote'] I concur with Keith's impressions. I'm not sure if I've read any Golden Age Aquaman at all, but I've read quite a bit of Silver Age stuff quite recently. Sadly, calling his use of sea life "creative" is being a little polite. Aqualad's appearances in the (original) Teen Titans exhibit the same pattern. Wonder Girl has super-strength - Aqualad doesn't. Of course you can always check for yourself. I am sure your friendly local comic store would love to sell you copies of the Showcase Presents Teen Titans and JLA volumes. According to the DC website, an Aquaman volume is supposed to be coming out in February. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keithcurtis Posted January 16, 2007 Report Share Posted January 16, 2007 Re: Top 10 List of the Lamest Superheroes of All Times Just consulted Wikipedia. Golden Age Aquaman had super strength and communicated with sea life like porpoises by "speaking their language". He was also fully human, the son of a scientist who found the ruins of (presumably) Atlantis, and raised his son underwater. All sorts of scientific secrets were used to give him his abilities. Silver Age eventually developed telepathy, had normal strength and a half-Atlantean origin. Keith "Thank you, O Wiki Oracle" Curtis Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OddHat Posted January 16, 2007 Report Share Posted January 16, 2007 Re: Top 10 List of the Lamest Superheroes of All Times Just consulted Wikipedia. Golden Age Aquaman had super strength and communicated with sea life like porpoises by "speaking their language". He was also fully human, the son of a scientist who found the ruins of (presumably) Atlantis, and raised his son underwater. All sorts of scientific secrets were used to give him his abilities. Silver Age eventually developed telepathy, had normal strength and a half-Atlantean origin. Keith "Thank you, O Wiki Oracle" Curtis So, Super Strength was in there from the start, and then got dropped for a while in the Silver Age. That matches Denis Power's articles on the subject; he's a great source for some things, but he's also a Wold Newton Great Game player, and so a certain amount of retconning on anything without a citation is to be expected. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MilkmanDan Posted January 16, 2007 Report Share Posted January 16, 2007 Re: Top 10 List of the Lamest Superheroes of All Times Well, I do have lame superheroes in my game world who try to join PC hero teams. So far, none have succeeded. Foghead: He makes a foghorn noise and giant rolling clouds of fog pour from his ears. If he could see in it, this might be a somewhat useful power...but nahhh.... Laundromaxx: That's right, folks. He wears a suit of power armor that looks like a Washer/Dryer setup. That pretty much says it all. Captain Canard and the Deadly Duck: Captain Canard is a fairly capable martial artist, as long as he isn't too far from his flying, obonxious, quacky duck associate who can generate a sonic blast from his beak. Players have actually considered Captain Canard and the Duck for membership, but he refused when they wanted to change his name. Frogolator: A man with giant cybernetic frog legs. 'Nuff said, True believers. Pizza Man: He throws pizzas which explode. This is not incredibly dangerous, but he does make a great pizza pie when he's NOT making pizzas explode. The Elephant Master: He has powerful telekinesis, but only over elephants. The Burger Kingpin: A man in a hamburger outfit. No one is really sure what he does. But they really don't want to find out. And...my personal favorite... THE BIG CHEESE: That's right. He turns into a colossal twelve foot cube of Swiss Cheese. For 24 hours. And he CAN'T SHUT IT OFF ONCE IT STARTS. Move here so I can join your campaign. These are hilarious, great comic relief. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corven_Ren Posted January 16, 2007 Report Share Posted January 16, 2007 Re: Top 10 List of the Lamest Superheroes of All Times Personally I think this guy is one of the lamest of all time http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sleepwalker_%28comics%29 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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