death tribble Posted February 9, 2006 Report Share Posted February 9, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions Q: What did you want to do for lunch today? A: Believe in yourself, my friend. Q. What piece of self help advice usually results in the destruction of the speaker when said by a prophet to their dispirited God ? A. You know the weather report said that there was an 80% chance of rain Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghost-angel Posted February 9, 2006 Report Share Posted February 9, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions Q. What piece of self help advice usually results in the destruction of the speaker when said by a prophet to their dispirited God ? A. You know the weather report said that there was an 80% chance of rain Q: Can you explain the metaphysical and sociopolitical connection between the philosophies of Plato and Descartes? A: Hey, that's nice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted February 9, 2006 Report Share Posted February 9, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions Q: Can you explain the metaphysical and sociopolitical connection between the philosophies of Plato and Descartes? A: Hey, that's nice. Q. Aren't those warts on Pamela Anderson's backside ? A. I mean these are powerful, powerful desires Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted February 9, 2006 Report Share Posted February 9, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions A. I mean these are powerful, powerful desires Q: What do you mean you'd literally kill for a Pastrami Rueben with deli mustard? A: Just throw an acronym in here or there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted February 9, 2006 Report Share Posted February 9, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions Q: What do you mean you'd literally kill for a Pastrami Rueben with deli mustard? A: Just throw an acronym in here or there. Q. How do we ensure Congress passes this legislation that will make us as rich as Croesus ? A. I, uh.......I couldn't sleep Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted February 9, 2006 Report Share Posted February 9, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions A. I, uh.......I couldn't sleep Q: WHy are you eating all the food in my fridge? In fact, What are you doing in my house?! A: The pidgeon sneezed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted February 9, 2006 Report Share Posted February 9, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions Q: WHy are you eating all the food in my fridge? In fact, What are you doing in my house?! A: The pidgeon sneezed. Q. Why did Dick Dasterdly and Mutley just blow up that barn ? A. I mean, they're the very essence of what makes us human Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted February 9, 2006 Report Share Posted February 9, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions A. I mean' date=' they're the very essence of what makes us human[/quote'] Q: So why do Moe, Larry, and Shemp go around poking each other in the eyes? A: No, sir, I'm afraid your group medical coverage doesn't include that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted February 9, 2006 Report Share Posted February 9, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions A: No, sir, I'm afraid your group medical coverage doesn't include that. Q: Will my HMO cover a sex change operation? A: Look for it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted February 9, 2006 Report Share Posted February 9, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions A: Look for it. Q: That ... that tasteless "joke" about the blind man and the goat ... it has no purpose, it has nothing funny in it, it's just disgusting and vile. Am I missing the point? What's the blind man supposed to do with the goat? A: That is the reason you fail. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enforcer84 Posted February 10, 2006 Report Share Posted February 10, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions Q: That ... that tasteless "joke" about the blind man and the goat ... it has no purpose' date=' it has nothing funny in it, it's just disgusting and vile. Am I missing the point? What's the blind man [u']supposed[/u] to do with the goat? A: That is the reason you fail. Q) Why is it everytime I am about to grab the brass ring, you tackle me? A) Fourteen crows, three gallons of maple syrup, and your bosses American Express card. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Basil Posted February 10, 2006 Report Share Posted February 10, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions A) Fourteen crows' date=' three gallons of maple syrup, and your bosses American Express card.[/quote'] Q: What's the most...interesting...way to start a bonfire? A: Meatless Tuesdays. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted February 10, 2006 Report Share Posted February 10, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions Q: What's the most...interesting...way to start a bonfire? A: Meatless Tuesdays. Q. What holiday invented by vegetarians failed to catch on with most Americans ? A. I am sorry.... I'm sorry Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enforcer84 Posted February 10, 2006 Report Share Posted February 10, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions Q. What holiday invented by vegetarians failed to catch on with most Americans ? A. I am sorry.... I'm sorry Q) I only wanted to be your friend, why! WHY!?!?!?!?!!? A) Hold on, let me get my gasmask first. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted February 10, 2006 Report Share Posted February 10, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions A) Hold on' date=' let me get my gasmask first.[/quote'] Q: Hey, I made another batch of my experimental top secret chili. Wanna try some? A: That's not a moon. It's somebody's butt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted February 13, 2006 Report Share Posted February 13, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions A: That's not a moon. It's somebody's butt. Q: Since that werewolf bit me, I start feeling weird evrytime I see the full moon. A: It fell to page 4. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ghost-angel Posted February 13, 2006 Report Share Posted February 13, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions Q: Since that werewolf bit me, I start feeling weird evrytime I see the full moon. A: It fell to page 4. Q: Who's responsible for this mess? A: And that's when the duck killed him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted February 13, 2006 Report Share Posted February 13, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions A: And that's when the duck killed him. Q: Isn't the punch line to that joke supposed to be, "A box of quackers?" AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH uggggjhhhhhhhhhh thump. A: I'm sorry, I just couldn't hold it any longer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted February 13, 2006 Report Share Posted February 13, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions Q: Isn't the punch line to that joke supposed to be, "A box of quackers?" AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH uggggjhhhhhhhhhh thump. A: I'm sorry, I just couldn't hold it any longer. Q. Superman, why did you let the Moon crash into the Presidential yacht ? A. I didn't believe that you'd do it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enforcer84 Posted February 13, 2006 Report Share Posted February 13, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions Q. Superman, why did you let the Moon crash into the Presidential yacht ? A. I didn't believe that you'd do it Q) Okay, so I brought you Gillian Anderson, killed her significant other, and now you won't give me your immortal soul? What Kind of Tribble Giver are you? A) Medium Rare. And don't skimp on the potatos. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
L. Marcus Posted February 13, 2006 Report Share Posted February 13, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions Q: So, how'd'yer want yer own words? A: The duct tape made me do it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted February 14, 2006 Report Share Posted February 14, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions A: The duct tape made me do it! Q: Mhmm hmph mhmhmpha? A: It's all in the delivery. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enforcer84 Posted February 14, 2006 Report Share Posted February 14, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions Q: Mhmm hmph mhmhmpha? A: It's all in the delivery. Q) Wait, you're not eat any of the 30 pizzas you ordered? A) Not so much like a rapier. Perhaps a Claymore wit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted February 14, 2006 Report Share Posted February 14, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions Q) Wait, you're not eat any of the 30 pizzas you ordered? A) Not so much like a rapier. Perhaps a Claymore wit. Q. So what do you think of the Billy Connelly impersonater ? A. No kidding Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted February 14, 2006 Report Share Posted February 14, 2006 Re: Answers & Questions A. No kidding Q: Have ou heard that goats are now using protection? A: he plead not guilty by reason of stupidity. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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