July 26, 200717 yr comment_1324555 Re: Answers & Questions A: Sorta like that' date=' but with brooms.[/quote'] Q: So I have to win a duel to the death with the other applicant to get the job as head janitor? A: That's odd. That's the fifth Pirate that's called today. There must be a convention in town.
July 27, 200717 yr comment_1324789 Re: Answers & Questions Q: So I have to win a duel to the death with the other applicant to get the job as head janitor? A: That's odd. That's the fifth Pirate that's called today. There must be a convention in town. Q: Hey, you're getting really good at dodging cutlasses. A: That's the taste of breaking glass.
July 27, 200717 yr comment_1324806 Re: Answers & Questions A: That's the taste of breaking glass. Q: I've never been thrown through a plate glass window before. It's an odd collection of sensations. For example, what's this flavor explosion I'm experiencing? A: Annie Lennox or k d lang, you decide.
July 27, 200717 yr comment_1324817 Re: Answers & Questions A: Annie Lennox or k d lang' date=' you decide.[/quote'] Q: For your crimes you have been sentenced to death by experiencing real-life equivilents of song lyrics. But you may choose the composor of your death. Who do you choose? A: That's cruel and unusual! But I like it! Doc
July 28, 200717 yr comment_1325099 Re: Answers & Questions Q: For your crimes you have been sentenced to death by experiencing real-life equivilents of song lyrics. But you may choose the composor of your death. Who do you choose? A: That's cruel and unusual! But I like it! Doc Q: We caught the guy who robbed you, what do you say about tossing him feet first into a wood chipper? A: Nice little town, but the night life around here leaves much to be desired.
July 28, 200717 yr comment_1325105 Re: Answers & Questions Q: We caught the guy who robbed you, what do you say about tossing him feet first into a wood chipper? A: Nice little town, but the night life around here leaves much to be desired. Q: So, What's your opinion of Santa Carla, CA? A: Try spending the whole day.
July 28, 200717 yr comment_1325112 Re: Answers & Questions A: Try spending the whole day. Q: Is there anything I can experience that would be worse than spending an hour in the Macon County lockup? A: If there's anything weirder than you, I've yet to see it.
July 28, 200717 yr Author comment_1325133 Re: Answers & Questions A: If there's anything weirder than you' date=' I've yet to see it.[/quote'] Q: What does Mightybec hear so often, he replies, "If I only had nickel every time I heard that!" ? A: Ghost hunting and nacho cheese.
July 28, 200717 yr comment_1325147 Re: Answers & Questions A: Ghost hunting and nacho cheese. Q: Name two great tastes that taste great together. A: And that is the lesson to be learned from the Parable of the Celebrity Harlot and the Octopus Men from A Planet near Alpha Centauri. Let us close with a hymn.
July 28, 200717 yr comment_1325160 Re: Answers & Questions A: And that is the lesson to be learned from the Parable of the Celebrity Harlot and the Octopus Men from A Planet near Alpha Centauri. Let us close with a hymn. Q: What did Reverend Sharpton say to make you think he was on LSD for Sunday's sermon? A: I didn't like it then, and I like it a whole lot less now.
July 28, 200717 yr comment_1325170 Re: Answers & Questions A: I didn't like it then' date=' and I like it a whole lot less now.[/quote'] Q: What do you think of the new Blu-Ray release of House of the Dead? It's in Swahili, with Farsi subtitles a commentary track by some random Polish alcoholic that can never be switched off! A: That was something I did not need to see in high-definition.
July 28, 200717 yr comment_1325176 Re: Answers & Questions A: That was something I did not need to see in high-definition. Q: Tammy Faye's funeral was an open-casket ceremony? (With apologies to the departed.) A: You, you, and you, panic. The rest of you, follow me.
July 28, 200717 yr comment_1325180 Re: Answers & Questions A: You' date=' you, and you, panic. The rest of you, follow me.[/quote'] Q: The android rebels are almost on top of us, sir! what are your orders? A: There is a time at which it is appropriate to flee in panicked terror with no regard for the safety of any other living thing. This, Gentlemen, is that time.
July 28, 200717 yr comment_1325232 Re: Answers & Questions A: There is a time at which it is appropriate to flee in panicked terror with no regard for the safety of any other living thing. This, Gentlemen, is that time. Q: Blackadder, the Germans are almost on top of our position. What should we do? A: keep a stiff upper lip.
July 28, 200717 yr Author comment_1325259 Re: Answers & Questions A: keep a stiff upper lip. Q: What is really lousy advice regarding oral sex? A: The 15-bladed razor.
July 29, 200717 yr comment_1325503 Re: Answers & Questions Q: What is really lousy advice regarding oral sex? A: The 15-bladed razor. Q: What grooming implement was banned by a special codicil to the Geneva Conventions? A: ASSWIPE: Shadow of Peoria.
July 30, 200717 yr comment_1325856 Re: Answers & Questions A: ASSWIPE: Shadow of Peoria. Q: Did you forget to take you Tourette's medication again? A: I find your proposal highly original, vastly intriguing, and deeply disturbing.
July 30, 200717 yr comment_1325932 Re: Answers & Questions A: I find your proposal highly original' date=' vastly intriguing, and deeply disturbing.[/quote'] Q: That's it! A working, safe & effective aphrodisiac gas! Where to use it first? The Legislature, the County Fair, or the junior high three blocks away? A: Y'know, you can get hard time in forty-three states just for thinking that.
July 30, 200717 yr Author comment_1325965 Re: Answers & Questions A: Y'know' date=' you can get hard time in forty-three states just for [u']thinking[/u] that. Q: What do you think of my plan to raise cash by posting these pictures from the orgy my grandma held last week on a pay-per-view website? A: Lots and lot and lots of hard work.
July 30, 200717 yr comment_1325966 Re: Answers & Questions A: Lots and lot and lots of hard work. Q: I want Jack to be the dullest boy imaginable. How do I do that? A: That's no space station -- THAT'S A MOON!
July 30, 200717 yr comment_1325981 Re: Answers & Questions A: That's no space station -- THAT'S A MOON! Q: What do you make of it, sir? Station 3W is oddly round, and it looks split down the middle.... A: You, sir, remain most tiresomely predictable.
July 30, 200717 yr Author comment_1326006 Re: Answers & Questions A: You' date=' sir, remain most tiresomely predictable.[/quote'] Q: How did Death Tribble react to Zornwill's latest death match challenge? A: And then, there was one million.
July 31, 200717 yr comment_1326271 Re: Answers & Questions A: And then' date=' there was one million.[/quote'] Q: I had a hundred million dollars! And thought about what to do with it! So I took it to the commodities market! A: Second prize in a beauty contest.
July 31, 200717 yr comment_1326274 Re: Answers & Questions A: Second prize in a beauty contest. Q: You just landed on Community Chest? What card you get? A: She has a Community Chest.
July 31, 200717 yr Author comment_1326383 Re: Answers & Questions A: She has a Community Chest. Q: What is a PC way of saying a girl "gets around"? A: Much thicker than it is long.
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.