Pariah Posted August 25, 2008 Report Share Posted August 25, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions A: Sarcasm is appreciated. Q: Any advice for posting on the NGD Board? A: I don't know that I'd really call it a 'service', actually. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted August 26, 2008 Report Share Posted August 26, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions Q: Any advice for posting on the NGD Board? A: I don't know that I'd really call it a 'service', actually. Q: What is your opinion of the IRS? A: And these people want to run health care? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted August 26, 2008 Report Share Posted August 26, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions A: And these people want to run health care? Q: Phillip Morris here. How can I help you? A: Sorry, I've already had a visit from Doctor Colt. It didn't go well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sundog Posted August 26, 2008 Report Share Posted August 26, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions Q: Phillip Morris here. How can I help you? A: Sorry, I've already had a visit from Doctor Colt. It didn't go well. Q: Hi, I'm Doctor Smith, this is Doctor Wesson. We're here to help you. A: Don't even ask about Doctor Steyr. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted August 26, 2008 Report Share Posted August 26, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions A: Don't even ask about Doctor Steyr. Q: So Dr. Kevorkian's not available? Who else can I talk to? A: I just wish she would shut her mouth already. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sundog Posted August 27, 2008 Report Share Posted August 27, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions Q: So Dr. Kevorkian's not available? Who else can I talk to? A: I just wish she would shut her mouth already. Q: Did you know Aunt Agatha likes raw meat? A: It is a great vista. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted August 27, 2008 Report Share Posted August 27, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions Q: Did you know Aunt Agatha likes raw meat? A: It is a great vista. Q: So you installed Linux on your computer? A: Microsoft can kiss my lily white mule. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sundog Posted August 27, 2008 Report Share Posted August 27, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions Q: So you installed Linux on your computer? A: Microsoft can kiss my lily white mule. Q: Did you know Microsoft has a new operating system for horses? A: Welcome to Smellyville. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted August 27, 2008 Report Share Posted August 27, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions A: Welcome to Smellyville. Q: Excuse me, I was looking for Tom Welling, Kristin Kreuk, and Michael Rosenbaum. Am I in the right place? A: You can't get there from here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted August 27, 2008 Report Share Posted August 27, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions A: You can't get there from here. Q: Do you know the way to the year 1086? A: Cobra on my left, Leopard on my right. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted August 27, 2008 Report Share Posted August 27, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions A: Cobra on my left' date=' Leopard on my right.[/quote'] Q: How do you know you're on display at the zoo, if you can't get out of your cell? A: The most interesting talk was the one-hour discussion about the evolution of tapeworms. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted August 27, 2008 Report Share Posted August 27, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions A: The most interesting talk was the one-hour discussion about the evolution of tapeworms. Q: Why didn't you enjoy the Biologists Convention programming? A: The parties, however, were epic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted August 27, 2008 Report Share Posted August 27, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions A: The parties' date=' however, were epic.[/quote'] Q: You look like you've been run over by a parade! You DID go to that programming conference I sent you too, right? A: That's not even the worst thing I've been called today! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted August 27, 2008 Report Share Posted August 27, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions A: That's not even the worst thing I've been called today! Q: Did you know you were a scum-sucking, misbegotten, subhuman slimeball with bad breath and obnoxious body odor who is a blight upon the Universe? A: And that, Your Honor, is why I took his pants away. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BoloOfEarth Posted August 28, 2008 Report Share Posted August 28, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions A: And that' date=' Your Honor, is why I took his pants away.[/quote'] Q: Judge, did you know that my client is the former judge that sued a dry cleaner for $65 million? A: Because THEY SKINNED PINKY! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sundog Posted August 28, 2008 Report Share Posted August 28, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions Q: Judge' date=' did you know that my client is the former judge that sued a dry cleaner for $65 million? A: Because THEY SKINNED PINKY! Q: Why did the Brain nuke KFC? A: Not all Urban Legends are Urbane. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted August 28, 2008 Report Share Posted August 28, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions A: Not all Urban Legends are Urbane. Q: Ewww, that's too disgusting to be true, isn't it? Please tell me that's too disgusting to be true! A: Nothing a jackhammer and a few milligrams of lithium wouldn't cure. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marcus Impudite Posted August 28, 2008 Report Share Posted August 28, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions Q: Ewww, that's too disgusting to be true, isn't it? Please tell me that's too disgusting to be true! A: Nothing a jackhammer and a few milligrams of lithium wouldn't cure. Q: Chesshire Cat materialized inside solid rock and now he's stuck, what do we do now? A: You were asked nicely not to do that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted August 28, 2008 Report Share Posted August 28, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions A: You were asked nicely not to do that. Q: Why did Power Girl beat me up? All I did was look at her magic window.... A: Amanda Tapping, Claudia Black, Claudia Christian, and Nicole deBoer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sundog Posted August 28, 2008 Report Share Posted August 28, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions Q: Why did Power Girl beat me up? All I did was look at her magic window.... A: Amanda Tapping, Claudia Black, Claudia Christian, and Nicole deBoer. Q: Okay, WHY are you suffering from Sci-fi Estrogen attraction overload? A: Smack and mirrors fell through. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted September 1, 2008 Report Share Posted September 1, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions A: Smack and mirrors fell through. Q: Why is there a hole in the bottom of this cargo transport? And what happened to your cargo of mirrors? A: That's not the way it happened at all. It was a lot less interesting than that, actually. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sundog Posted September 1, 2008 Report Share Posted September 1, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions Q: Why is there a hole in the bottom of this cargo transport? And what happened to your cargo of mirrors? A: That's not the way it happened at all. It was a lot less interesting than that, actually. Q: So, you were giving an interview, when the gorilla and the guerilla started shooting at each other, and the mutant mouse set off the bomb? Is that what you're saying? A: It was a discharge - but not that kind. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted September 1, 2008 Report Share Posted September 1, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions A: It was a discharge - but not that kind. Q: You were kicked out of the Army? A: Clearly, one of the bulbs is burned out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted September 1, 2008 Report Share Posted September 1, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions A: Clearly' date=' one of the bulbs is burned out.[/quote'] Q: What do you mean the hotel has No Acancy? A: Pinch me, girls -- this couldn't be happening! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sundog Posted September 3, 2008 Report Share Posted September 3, 2008 Re: Answers & Questions Q: What do you mean the hotel has No Acancy? A: Pinch me, girls -- this couldn't be happening! Q: What do you not say when you come upon an entire cheerleading squad nude sunbathing? A: Just one drop and ka-boom! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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