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2 hours ago, Cancer said:

A: Not your head.

 

Q: What should I use to break open this coconut?

 

A: It's adorable that you think you still have a soul.

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5 hours ago, Pariah said:

 

Q: What should I use to break open this coconut?

 

A: It's adorable that you think you still have a soul.

 

Q: Mr. Angel, what do you say is your best feature?

 

A: Tomorrow we will have our Legends.

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11 hours ago, Cancer said:

A: Booty call!!

 

Q: She doesn't really want to talk to you about footwear, does she?

 

A: Who said things were going to get better?

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On 10/10/2019 at 9:14 AM, Michael Hopcroft said:

A: The Abbey will stand forever, unfortunately.

 

Q: Six series wasn't enough, now there's a movie, too? Shut it down already.

 

A: Fill in the blanks, genius.

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On 10/14/2019 at 4:56 PM, Michael Hopcroft said:

Q: And how do you play Mad Libs again?

 

A: That's the most obscure crossword puzzle I've ever seen in my life. I wonder if it's even meant to be solved!

 

Q: What is the meaning of this? Is there anyone who can speak Sumarian?

 

A: Your supply will be unlimited*

         *until they run out.

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On 10/14/2019 at 6:56 PM, Michael Hopcroft said:

Q: And how do you play Mad Libs again?

 

A: That's the most obscure crossword puzzle I've ever seen in my life. I wonder if it's even meant to be solved!

 

4 hours ago, Asperion said:

 

Q: What is the meaning of this? Is there anyone who can speak Sumarian?

 

A: Your supply will be unlimited*

         *until they run out.

 

Q: I love this crossword puzzle, can I get more like it?

 

A: That depends. How well do you speak Sumerian?

 

Lucius Alexander

 

The palindromedary doesn't think we're supposed to be this coherent....

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On October 17, 2019 at 2:15 AM, Michael Hopcroft said:

A: But I would not feel so all alone -- everybody must get stoned!

 

Q: What do you mean you won't let me in until I fail a Breathalyzer test?  You let all those barfing drunk slobs in!

 

A: Certain things cannot be delivered by drone, like fissile metal, boat anchors, and twelve-year-old girls.

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22 minutes ago, Cancer said:

A: Certain things cannot be delivered by drone, like fissile metal, boat anchors, and twelve-year-old girls.

Q: Amazon Customer Service is even creepier than usual today. Any good reasons?

 

A: There is only one thing Google doesn't know about me, and it would be difficult were it to be discovered.

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6 hours ago, Michael Hopcroft said:

A: There is only one thing Google doesn't know about me, and it would be difficult were it to be discovered.

 

Q: So how, or better yet, why, have you managed to keep your wife from learning about the existence of Google?

 

A: Neither have they

 

Lucius Alexander

 

Did the palindromedary eat my tagline?

 

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On October 19, 2019 at 1:55 AM, Lucius said:

A: Neither have they.

 

Q: We haven't got a general solution for a seventh-degree polynomial, do we?

 

A: It's called a "septic equation".

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9 hours ago, Cancer said:

A: It's called a "septic equation".

 

Q: Is there a way to calculate the differential flow rate of raw sewage through a pipe of fixed diameter?

 

A: That's the worst idea I've ever heard. We should do it immediately.

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4 hours ago, Pariah said:

A: That's the worst idea I've ever heard. We should do it immediately.

Q: Don't we need to build a border wall that wouldn't keep out out a determined gopher?

 

A: Maybe relying on Yahoo groups for your entire promotional platform didn't turn out as you planned.

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9 hours ago, Michael Hopcroft said:

A: Maybe relying on Yahoo groups for your entire promotional platform didn't turn out as you planned.

 

Q:  163,000 unsubscriptions in 48 hours?!?  What did we do?!?

 

A:  That's not a lab class; that's a hazing ritual!

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9 hours ago, Cancer said:

A:  That's not a lab class; that's a hazing ritual!

 

Q: Describe CHEM 3000 (Analytical Chemistry) in ten words.or less.

 

A: Quantums and gravity and bosons and stuff.

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1 hour ago, Michael Hopcroft said:

Q: What are you getting all wibbly-wobbly timey-whimey about?

 

A: And now I am dealing with the Platonic ideal of the great and total fool.

 

Q: Can anyone describe Deadpool in a manner that will make him look sane?

 

A: Care of your Pit Fiend in two words.

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On 10/23/2019 at 4:34 PM, Michael Hopcroft said:

Q: Feed It?

 

A: No, you can't date battleships. That never ends well.

 

Q: I would like everyone to meet my date, the USS Milwaukee. What does everyone mean that there could be some problem with this?

 

A: Do that and you will literally be fanning the flames.

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8 hours ago, Asperion said:

A: Do that and you will literally be fanning the flames.

 

Q: I know what we need to stop these wildfires: hurricane-force winds!

 

A: Finger on the trigger.

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57 minutes ago, Pariah said:

A: Finger on the trigger.

Q: I know you think you're following the instructions, but are you sure you're pointing your piston in the right direction?

 

A: Nothing human could have done this, so I blame social media, like I blame it for everything else.

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6 hours ago, Michael Hopcroft said:

Q: I know you think you're following the instructions, but are you sure you're pointing your piston in the right direction?

 

A: Nothing human could have done this, so I blame social media, like I blame it for everything else.

 

Q: There is a Mr. Bezos at the door. What should I say to him?

 

A: That is one interesting chicken.

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