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Quote of the Week From My Life.


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My wife is doing a series at church on the founding of America, of course that means Pilgrims. As she's researching, she keeps finding new things related to what she's looking at and trying to figure

Last night my eldest (7) took all his remaining allowance and birthday money (~$40) and put it in an envelope to give to the church. He said, "The church needs it more than I do. It will help."   My

Student: "I notice that you've been getting more sassy with our class. Is that because you're starting to feel more comfortable with us, or because you're just getting tired of our bullcrap?"   Me:

In the middle of the class, one student decided he wanted Dippin' Dots ice cream. So he asked me if he could go and get some, as there's a Safeway nearby. I wasn't having any of this, especially since he came to class 20 minutes late. That didn't stop him from begging for the rest of the session. At one point, he decided to channel Shakespeare.

 

Student: I beseech thee. Prithee....

 

Me: I say thee NAY!

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Years ago, one of my daughters typed up something on my computer when I had stepped away.  It amused me enough that I printed it off and saved it.  I recently discovered it, and decided to save a copy here for posterity.

 

I LOVE YOU!  YOU LOVE ME!  WE'RE A HAPPY FAMILY!

HIIIII DADDY!!!  I'M SPECIAL IN A SUPER DUPER SPECIAL WAY OF RAINBOWS AND AWESOMENESS THAT IS SO MUCH BETTER THAN YOUR AWESOMENESS!!!

I SHALL RIDE A FEROCIOUS UNICORN WITH A LIGHTSABER HORN INTO BATTLE AND CONQUER YOUR LAME ARMY OF NOT-AS-AWESOME-AS-ME-NESS!

I LIKE COOKIES AND CANDY AND COOKIES.  I ALSO WOULD RIDE A DRAGON INTO BATTLE IF I HAD ONE BUT I DON'T SO I WON'T.

Have a nice day.

 

Hmmm... I have no idea where they got their weirdness...  ;)

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  • 2 weeks later...

OT: I think we created a joke exam question along those lines once, actually.  "Estimate the space density of gerbils if the dark matter responsible for the Galaxy's rotation curve is in the form of gerbils.  Comment on possible observational tests of this hypothesis."

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This is not from this week, but from some decades ago. One of my brothers were hanging out with his friends -- most of whom are of questionable intelligence -- and one of the guys was just sitting there, apparently deep in thought. After more than an hour, he stirs and says, "You guys, I've been wondering ... what does snot smell like?"

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"I promise not to judge you based on your race, gender identity, sexual orientation, religion, or political affiliation. But I will judge you based on your spelling and grammar, your use of your turn signal, and whether or not you believe that vaccines cause autism."

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