Lord Liaden Posted September 19, 2019 Report Share Posted September 19, 2019 I was recently at a get-together dinner for my sister-in-law's family, who are of German descent. At the dinner table one of them offered me sauerkraut, which I don't like. I really didn't think through my response: "No thanks, I'm not a kraut person." Duke Bushido and tkdguy 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted October 1, 2019 Report Share Posted October 1, 2019 {On-line chatter while watching an NFL game; this specific quote comes from fans of a team which just gave up a pick-6} "Guess I'm gonna start throwing beer bottles earlier than I thought" "Make sure they're empty. Otherwise that's alcohol abuse." "Duh!!! I don't abuse beer that's just WRONG" tkdguy 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted October 1, 2019 Report Share Posted October 1, 2019 If you get an imaginary number from any of these calculations, you're probably accelerating perpendicular to reality. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted October 1, 2019 Report Share Posted October 1, 2019 Quote "He's an interesting guy" is a euphemism for "He's really f----d up". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted October 1, 2019 Report Share Posted October 1, 2019 This last post makes me wonder if we need to start a "Truths Universally Acknowledged"/"Captain Obvious" thread. Cancer 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted October 1, 2019 Report Share Posted October 1, 2019 That last quote was me, responding to someone telling me that two of my students had left lab saying that about me. Having been around the two-pi-AU block a few dozen times, I felt obliged to translate the comment. L. Marcus 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted October 10, 2019 Report Share Posted October 10, 2019 "If I had a dollar for every time I get distracted, I wish I had a puppy!" ~Woody Paige Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted October 13, 2019 Report Share Posted October 13, 2019 "He has to go to the dentist. He chipped his tooth; he's in pain." "What time is his appointment?" "Two-thirty." "Two-thirty?! Are you serious? He has a dentist appointment at TOOTH-HURTY?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted October 21, 2019 Report Share Posted October 21, 2019 Gandalf would've said "No way, Jose" to that one! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted October 21, 2019 Report Share Posted October 21, 2019 I didn't ask for your opinion because I already know you are incapable of expressing approval. Grailknight, tkdguy and Pariah 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted October 21, 2019 Report Share Posted October 21, 2019 Quote Everyone's Gangstar til the Schizophrenic Twink picks up a frog and calls his second personality Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted October 22, 2019 Report Share Posted October 22, 2019 20 hours ago, Cancer said: I didn't ask for your opinion because I already know you are incapable of expressing approval. Similarly: "I'm not so desperate for approval that I'm willing to do what would be necessary to gain yours." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted October 23, 2019 Report Share Posted October 23, 2019 I suppose certain things are inevitable spam. Quote From: "Cancer-2020" <cancer@madridgegroup.net> Subject: Regarding Participation at Cancer Science-2020 Miami Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted October 26, 2019 Report Share Posted October 26, 2019 At the staff meeting, the center director reminded us to encourage our clients to review us on Google. I said, "We'll tell them to like, share, and subscribe." Everyone had a good laugh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted October 26, 2019 Report Share Posted October 26, 2019 "Somehow 'Collateral Damage Jane' doesn't have quite the same ring to it." tkdguy 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted October 27, 2019 Report Share Posted October 27, 2019 "It's a grilled cheese sandwich. It's like a quesadilla, but with bread." tkdguy 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted October 30, 2019 Report Share Posted October 30, 2019 I just watched a Judo video on YouTube. One of the throws was Uchi-mata. The close caption read: "Mountain know she's just a Chewbacca." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted October 31, 2019 Report Share Posted October 31, 2019 "rofl&pmp" "?" "peeing my pants" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted November 2, 2019 Report Share Posted November 2, 2019 "Who's that guy? He's so clean cut it's scary." "Careful. He might be a clergyman." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted November 4, 2019 Report Share Posted November 4, 2019 "Your ears get pointier every day!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted November 6, 2019 Report Share Posted November 6, 2019 "Instead of 'quack', it says 'quock'? That's reduckulous!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucius Posted November 7, 2019 Author Report Share Posted November 7, 2019 "Are you trying to kill me? Because I have no interest in dying." Lucius Alexander The palindromedary says don't even ask for the context. tkdguy 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted November 7, 2019 Report Share Posted November 7, 2019 Brighton... It's like Santa Cruz, only colder. Cancer 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted November 8, 2019 Report Share Posted November 8, 2019 ♪ ♫ "Hold me closer, tiny pancake." ♫♪ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BoloOfEarth Posted November 9, 2019 Report Share Posted November 9, 2019 Me (holding a rake, dumping leaves into a bag) My wife (pulls into driveway and rolls down car window): Are you raking leaves? Me: No. I'm building a pool. (My only regret is that I didn't think until afterward that I should have said, "Here's your sign.") Rails, Hermit and Pariah 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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