tkdguy Posted January 15, 2011 Report Share Posted January 15, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. Student (an avid Justin Beiber fan): My sister said Judgement Day is coming in May. Me: If that happens, at least you'll be able to hang out with Justin Beiber all you like afterwards. Student: On another day working with same student, who's doing a report on the Greek god Pan: Me: That's where the word panic comes from. People were terrified of him. He had horns. He had goat legs. He looked like Justin Bieber. Student: Not funny! Not funny! Burrito Boy 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
L. Marcus Posted January 15, 2011 Report Share Posted January 15, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. Poor Pan. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
L. Marcus Posted January 18, 2011 Report Share Posted January 18, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. My youngest brother and his three years old son are playing, building a castle out of Duplo. The kid has to take care of a call of nature, so bro keeps on building. When the kid comes back, he's turned into a footballer or something and proceeds with kicking the castle down. Bro asks kid what he thinks he's doing, and gets the answer: "What a sucky reality." We all wonder where a three year old boy gets these words. I suspect it's me. ^^ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Man Posted January 19, 2011 Report Share Posted January 19, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. "Eeew! Why did you fart on me?!" "That's how I distract my prey!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drhoz Posted January 22, 2011 Report Share Posted January 22, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. Sunday at GhenghisCon - Leece's cryptozoology panel was slightly drowned out by Purrdence belting out Bohemian Rhapsody *in another building*. She was even drowning out the cicadas on the window. Mark, presenter : I'm not sure if Bohemian Rhapsody is an appropriate soundtrack for a cryptozoology talk Leece, co-presenter : I see a little silhouetto? At one of the panels "The people at my work are now conditioned to ignore what I wear. The other day I was in a full-on superhero outfit. Three capes! Red mohawk wig, visor... And they didn't even blink. They just came in and said "oh, hey X". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drhoz Posted January 25, 2011 Report Share Posted January 25, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. Watching a documentary about catastrophes, currently discussing the Yellowstone supervolcano and the geysers thereof Purrdence : 'Geezers'? I thought it was pronounced 'guy-sers' Me : Geezers is closer to the original Icelandic iirc Tony Robinson, narrating : Yellowstone has the largest concentration of 'geezers' in the world... Purrdence : I thought Florida did Me : You have to admit those geezers DO spout off a lot Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shadow Hawk Posted January 25, 2011 Report Share Posted January 25, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. Watching a documentary about catastrophes, currently discussing the Yellowstone supervolcano and the geysers thereof Purrdence : 'Geezers'? I thought it was pronounced 'guy-sers' Me : Geezers is closer to the original Icelandic iirc Tony Robinson, narrating : Yellowstone has the largest concentration of 'geezers' in the world... Purrdence : I thought Florida did Me : You have to admit those geezers DO spout off a lot The "Yellowstone Supervolcano" reminds me of a statement made by my father, a geologist working for NPS as a 'Ranger/Naturalist' at Yellowstone... "The first warning you'll have of a eruption will be thousands of postgrad geology students flooding the park, looking for disertion material for thier doctorates. Your last warning will be thosands of postgrad geology students fleeing for thier lives." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Celt Posted January 25, 2011 Report Share Posted January 25, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. During the Jets abysmal display in the first half of last Sunday's game: Friend: Maybe they're trying to lull them into a false sense of security. Me: Well, that's a cunning strategy that SUCKS! 8FP: Honey, remember what happened to Xander. Me: The seeing eye gets a sharp poke.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drhoz Posted January 26, 2011 Report Share Posted January 26, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. The "Yellowstone Supervolcano" reminds me of a statement made by my father, a geologist working for NPS as a 'Ranger/Naturalist' at Yellowstone... "The first warning you'll have of a eruption will be thousands of postgrad geology students flooding the park, looking for disertion material for thier doctorates. Your last warning will be thosands of postgrad geology students fleeing for thier lives." *thumbs up* Although I'm willing to bet that a fair percentage of them hang around anyway. Volcanologists seem to go collectively insane when collected together. They just egg each other on to see how close they can get to the eruption. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shadow Hawk Posted January 26, 2011 Report Share Posted January 26, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. *thumbs up* Although I'm willing to bet that a fair percentage of them hang around anyway. Volcanologists seem to go collectively insane when collected together. They just egg each other on to see how close they can get to the eruption. There's a lot of truth in that. David A. Johnston (the geologist on Mt. St. Helens) was taking the watch for vulcanologist Harry Glicken, who died eleven years later when he was surrounded by a lava flow at a different Mt Unzen in Japan. If you want to be a exciting scientist in geology, you go play tag with volcanoes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drhoz Posted January 26, 2011 Report Share Posted January 26, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. There's a lot of truth in that. David A. Johnston (the geologist on Mt. St. Helens) was taking the watch for vulcanologist Harry Glicken' date=' who died eleven years later when he was surrounded by a lava flow at a different Mt Unzen in Japan. If you want to be a exciting scientist in geology, you go play tag with volcanoes.[/quote'] I recall reading on Google Books about a group of volcanologists who wanted lava samples, and eventually decided the best way to get them was ride a pumice raft down the lava flow. Maniacs. They're all completely out of their minds. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teh bunneh Posted January 26, 2011 Report Share Posted January 26, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. Me: You should feel lucky. Those things are hard to come by. Our Marketing guys hold on to them like they're made of gold. Her: Gold, like "Golden Shower?" Me: Hey now! None of that dirty stuff! We only sell the best, most wholesome old-fashioned, family-friendly pr0n! Her: Uh... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IndianaJoe3 Posted January 26, 2011 Report Share Posted January 26, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. If you want to be a exciting scientist in geology' date=' you go play tag with volcanoes.[/quote'] I think you mean, "ex-scientist." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teh bunneh Posted January 26, 2011 Report Share Posted January 26, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. Friend: You always roll well! Me: No, I generally roll within the statistical mean. I just build my characters so that I can almost always succeed on a roll of 9-12. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
L. Marcus Posted January 26, 2011 Report Share Posted January 26, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. I've met a man who claims to have broken a breathalyzer simply by utilizing it for its intended use. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
matrix3 Posted January 27, 2011 Report Share Posted January 27, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. I've met a man who claims to have broken a breathalyzer simply by utilizing it for its intended use. What, he breathed into it and it melted? Reading was so high it shorted out? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
L. Marcus Posted January 27, 2011 Report Share Posted January 27, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. It blew out, apparently. Very powerful lungs! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted January 30, 2011 Report Share Posted January 30, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. Student: I'm supposed to perform a composition by Bach. Me: Bach isn't bad. Student: Bach is okay. He's Baroque. Me: I know; he never had any money. Student: That's really bad. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Man Posted January 30, 2011 Report Share Posted January 30, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. "So I finally arranged it so that you'll get a flat percentage on every deal done by your team, instead of the ridiculous system we were using before. So you should get a slight increase in your paycheck." "Really? Wow! Thanks, boss." "You're welcome. Also, the company's business model is dead. You need to start looking for an exit strategy. Now." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Narf the Mouse Posted January 30, 2011 Report Share Posted January 30, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. "So I finally arranged it so that you'll get a flat percentage on every deal done by your team, instead of the ridiculous system we were using before. So you should get a slight increase in your paycheck." "Really? Wow! Thanks, boss." "You're welcome. Also, the company's business model is dead. You need to start looking for an exit strategy. Now." So sorta 'Useless news, bad news'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted January 30, 2011 Report Share Posted January 30, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. "So I finally arranged it so that you'll get a flat percentage on every deal done by your team, instead of the ridiculous system we were using before. So you should get a slight increase in your paycheck." "Really? Wow! Thanks, boss." "You're welcome. Also, the company's business model is dead. You need to start looking for an exit strategy. Now." At least you were given fair warning. Far too many companies lie through their teeth to employees to keep them on-board for as long as possible when the ship is sinking... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Man Posted January 30, 2011 Report Share Posted January 30, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. Yes. It does suck less. But it still sucks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teh bunneh Posted January 31, 2011 Report Share Posted January 31, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. "Denial isn't just a river in Egypt. It's also the government in Egypt." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucius Posted January 31, 2011 Author Report Share Posted January 31, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. "So I finally arranged it so that you'll get a flat percentage on every deal done by your team, instead of the ridiculous system we were using before. So you should get a slight increase in your paycheck." "Really? Wow! Thanks, boss." "You're welcome. Also, the company's business model is dead. You need to start looking for an exit strategy. Now." I have until 29MAR2011 Lucius Alexander Already packing the palindromedary saddle bags Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shadow Hawk Posted January 31, 2011 Report Share Posted January 31, 2011 Re: Quote of the Week From My Life. I have until 29MAR2011 Lucius Alexander Already packing the palindromedary saddle bags That's better than how I lost the job I held last January... December 09: "The contract ends 28 Feb 10, plan accordingly." 01 January 10: "They're re-negotiating the contract. It will be extended. There will be pay raises." 15 January 10: "The contract has been extended. Look at a 10% raise for everyone on the 1st of March." 29 January 10: "The job is being moved to Florida in March. None of you are invited." 30 January 10: "Did I say March? I meant now. You're unemployed. And we're going to claim that you are contractors, and don't deserve unemployment benefits." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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