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Well'p aside from a note on the XLS CRS this'll be my first hello, and typical at that. I apologize but, hello, I have complaints.

 

Because I've been moaning for years about the physical basic rulebook being unavailable for so long, a friend passed me "Hero2Page.pdf" recently. Now, I've read vols 1-2 and I feel I somewhat understand it all. This PDF, however, not so much. I'll have to take this in stages because it's a compound issue: the first thing that makes no sense to me, is the description of dice rolls.

 

In the below image, lines struck in red are written in an alien language closely resembling English, but discernable from it by having zero context to the surrounding English text. Lines struck in yellow say the exact opposite of what they mean to say.

 

Hero2Page.pdf-2.png

 

I am not being facetious or trying to be cruel. I don't normally have reading-comprehension problems. I'm pretty certain the problem here is that this PDF leaps into using shorthand versions of official terminology with no warning. I think there might be explanations for this first bit later, in the PDF, but I don't think they're explicitly stated as such ("...which is why (insert previously unexplained Mixed case Official Term here) is called what it is and works as it does.") As a teaching presentation this goes right into a ditch, breaks the axle, and then explicitly tells you to drive in the same gear for the rest of the trip.

 

Once I can understand what those red lines are supposed to mean, I can move on to read the rest.

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Here is an extremely simple combat example that might help explain Normal and Killing Damage calculations.

 

Tough Guy is unarmed.

Thug has a knife.

 

Tough Guy punches the Thug. 

Punching is considered Normal Damage.

Based on his STRength he gets to roll 4d6 damage. 

The Total on the dice (2,3.5,6) is 16 which is how much STUN damage he does.

He also does 5 BODY damage since he rolled 4 dice with no 'ones' and 1 'six' (4+1).

 

Thug was not STUNNED by Tough Guy's Punch so he decides to stab the Tough Guy with his Knife.

A Knife does Killing Damage.

Based on his STRrength he gets to roll 1d6+1.

He rolls a 4 so does 5 BODY Killing Damage.

He now rolls a 1/2D6 (or a D3 if you own one) to find the STUN multiplier to determine the STUN damage.

He rolls a 6 (which no matter what system is used becomes a "3" on a half d6) and gets a 3.

3x5=15 so he does 15 STUN.

 

Tough Guy is not STUNNED but he has taken 5 BODY and is likely bleeding.

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First, thank you very much for taking the time to give an example.

 

 

After several more reads and your examples, I think some text changes would make things a ton clearer.

 

Instead of "Effect rolls may be counted in two ways" perhaps "GMs will ask for Effect rolls in two different ways:"

 

Instead of the existing paragraph about halving, perhaps:

 

Halving: Sometimes die rolls involve a 1/2d6, half the result of a d6. For BODY, you still count dice, but subtract 1 for rolling 1-3, and add 1 for rolling 4-6. For Total rolls, simply halve (rounding up).

 

 

I am still unclear about:
"Effects of +1 add no BODY."

 

 

In the damage section:

The second sentence in the first paragraph would be clearer if replaced with the following (if this is, indeed, the same meaning):

 

"Both types can mean damage to BODY (health) and/or STUN (consciousness). For Normal Damage rolls to BODY, count the BODY; for Normal Damage to STUN, you Total the roll."

 

The second paragraph could be clearer as (again, if I'm translating this right):

 

"...where you Total rolls for Killing Damage to BODY. Multiply Killing STUN damage by 1/2d6."

 

 

Also, and my friend disagreed with me on this one so we may need to bust out a Strunck and White's or something, but the line I struck in yellow seems to clarify in exactly the wrong direction. I realize may gamers will say "okay, losing 70-80% if I don't take Complications, that can't be what they mean" - but were this a brand new RPG player, they might read what I think that actually does say - paraphrased, "If you do not take complications, you gain typically 20% to 30% of your total Character Points." Meaning, I think the format of sentence used there is a clarifying clause - the bit after the dash is equivalent to the bit before the dash.

 

 

I really am sorry to be That Guy but I've had it as my living on many occasions to figure out how to crunch words for space and still be clear. I honestly just can't be sure I'm making heads or tails of this PDF as is and I hope both to get my reads clarified, and possibly contribute (I hereby release the text editing suggestions contained in this post to Steven Long and his assigns for the purposes of errata to be published without credit or remuneration in perpetuity) something others might find easier to grok :).

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For that bit about Matching Complications I finally see what you were thinking -- the bit after the dash is the Campaign Limit for Matching Complications. What about perhaps:

 

On the first paragraph in the second column of page 1, starting with "If you do not take Complications" through the end of that paragraph, replace:

 

Some of your total Character Points - typically 20-30% - must be earned by taking Complications worth equal points. Without Matching Complications, you cannot spend that portion of your total Character Points.

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Ahaa, okay. I found one Narf the Mouse on these forums and wrote a PM asking for a look at this thread, in hopes it's the right person. I see Bill is Art Director so I'm guessing he and Steven were involved mainly for finishing/blessing.

I'm not good at explaining things. I tend to write some of the technical details in my head...And unfortunately, not on the paper.

 

If someone with actual writing skills wants to clean up the document and produce their own, better version, it is public domain, and you wouldn't be the first. ;) A few people have done so already. For that matter, if you want to write your own entirely new one, I certainly have no cause to object. :)

 

I've attached the original versions to this post, if you want to edit those (plus, I'm not sure how available they are, anymore).

Hero In Two Pages by Narf and T Bunneh without background.pdf

Hero In Two Pages by Narf and T. Bunneh with background-1.pdf

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Yuck, but understood. I actually hope we can go through the whole thing, and my first question is, does everyone think my "translation" of the original text, is correct?

 

And secondly, @dmjalund, are you willing to do this in 2-3 phases anyway? As mentioned, I didn't want to go thru the whole document until I knew whether I was translating correctly.

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Ah, I don't have a way to directly edit a PDF. I don't suppose the real original was an OpenOffice document?

I'm not sure the originals still exist, unfortunately. My HDDs have a tendency to crash. However, I do back up, and maybe one of the back-ups caught it. If so, I'll edit this post. If not, I'll edit this post, but you'll see different text than it would be if I found it.

 

Edit: It's probably lost, unfortunately. Sorry, folks. However, if I do find it at some point, I'll try to remember this thread.

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I'm not good at explaining things. I tend to write some of the technical details in my head...And unfortunately, not on the paper.

 

If someone with actual writing skills wants to clean up the document and produce their own, better version, it is public domain, and you wouldn't be the first. ;) A few people have done so already. For that matter, if you want to write your own entirely new one, I certainly have no cause to object. :)

 

I've attached the original versions to this post, if you want to edit those (plus, I'm not sure how available they are, anymore).

Narf, they are a freebie available on DriveThruRPG. So they are very available.

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I've discovered PDFedit, but it can't edit the file :( If I don't delinearize, text isn't editable; if I do, PDFedit crashes.

 

(Adobe gets none of my money, and besides that, I'd rather not know what they'd install on my machine to go with an Acrobat trial. Having Flash and Reader installed makes me feel like I have gaping holes in my person, enough as it is.)

 

 

 

I may have more time than @dmjalund for this... does anyone know anything roughly as good at editing PDFs as Acrobat, but not made by Adobe?

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