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A Thread for Random Musings


Old Man

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Re: A Thread for Random Musings

 

Watching the goings-on out the bedroom window, I think we have at least two pairs of crows nesting in the Douglas fir outside our bedroom. They're quiet now, but as soon as the eggs hatch, it will be cacophony dawn til dusk ... and dawn is unspeakably early at our latitude this time of year.

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Re: A Thread for Random Musings

 

Met a Retired Herophile in the local Stop n Shop today. I was wearing my Hero shirt and he stopped me. Said he played for many years in the Old Days of Hero 1-3. Said his campaign world was fleshed out from the Dinosaur age. Said he had every publication there was then. Like all of us, he started with AD&D in the Military. I mentioned this Board, but he said he was permanently retired. Pity.

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Re: A Thread for Random Musings

 

Apparently there was some kind of implosion over on livejournal. None of the communities I'm in were affected, but I've been hearing about it all day, nonetheless. It seems someone got overzealous in their attempt to shield minors from porn, and themselves from lawsuits accusing them of making child porn accessible. None of the communities they deleted actually seemed to involve any of that, bafflingly.

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Re: A Thread for Random Musings

 

Ah, the auto spammer. The undisputed bottom feeder of the internet. How I have longed for a target to use the FULL might of my mod powers against. No concerns of how I might be misunderstanding, or being too harsh. No concerns for making sure my own personal peeves aren't influencing me... not this time!

 

I delete you with relish, I gloat open and free as I crush your hopes of selling your unasked for made by god knows what sweatshop unfettered and unwanted fecal matter of a product. I feel like a celtic curse incarnate... your name be unsung, your harp be unstrung, and all your dreams undone. I am the figure in the flowing cape who has usurped your gauche little opera. I am the speedbump you didn't see coming when you decided to use this suburb street like your own personal 90 mph bypass. I am the dragon in who's cave you decided to take a #2, only to get your ass burned bad. I am guiltless power crushingly applied like a thunderstroke thrown by Jove in a righteous cause. I am BEYOND the worst of your nightmares!

 

MWhAHAHAHAHAHA!

 

 

*cough* Anyway, it was refreshing to do that, oddly enough. :)

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Re: A Thread for Random Musings

 

Last night I dreamt of a friend I'd lost touch with many years ago. I remembered her first name in the dream, but all I could remember when I woke up was that her last name began with an "S." And I felt like it was just on the tip of my tongue, but I couldn't remember it. It was bothering me.

 

I remembered that her father had been a dentist, so I did a search for dentists in my hometown. And I found it: Shakalis.

 

Well, no wonder.

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Re: A Thread for Random Musings

 

People are banging on the outside of my place with hammers. They started at 8:00 am. I was up till 2:00 and I may be up just as late tonight. Thank God they don't do weekends. :ugly:

 

Edit: They do do Saturdays. I was up till 3:00 this morning. Up again by 8:00. Please God, give them Sunday off !

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My Sometimes Surreal Job - Yet Another Installment

 

Enclosed are:

 

1. General Eisenhower's covering letter (Enclosure A - replaced by "Directive for Commander in Chief, Allied Expeditionary Force");

 

2. General Eisenhower's 2nd revised outline plan (Enclosure B);

 

*yadda yadda yadda, I'm not transcribing the whole thing.....*

 

Washington, D.C.

 

13th August, 1942

 

 

 

1942?!

 

 

Okay - how did parts of Eisenhower's plans for Operation Torch end up in the voucher packet of some lieutenant colonel who hadn't even been born when Patton was duking it out with Rommell's Afrika Korps?

 

Lucius Alexander

 

The palindromedary philosophically observes that we'll never know the answer to that one, and should just be glad we didn't end up calculating 65 years of interest owed on some soldier's back pay....

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Re: A Thread for Random Musings

 

After getting all of Pope Benedict's luggage loaded into the limousine, the driver notices that the Pope is still standing on the curb.

 

"Excuse me, Your Holiness," says the driver, "Would you please take your seat so we can leave?"

 

"Well, to tell you the truth," says the Pope, "they never let me drive at the Vatican, and I'd really like to drive today, just for a short while." Then the Pope said with a smile, "Besides, there will be something extra in it for you."

 

Reluctantly, the driver gets in the back as the Pope climbs in behind the wheel. The driver quickly regrets his decision when, after exiting the airport, the Pontiff floors the gas pedal, accelerating the limo to 105 mph.

 

"Please slow down, Your Holiness!" pleads the worried driver, but the Pope maintains top speed until they hear sirens. The driver moans from the back seat, "Oh, dear God, I'm gonna lose my license -- and my job!"

 

The Pope pulls over and rolls down the window as the cop approaches. The cop takes one look at him, runs back to his motorcycle, and gets on the radio. "I need to talk to the Chief," he says to the dispatcher.

 

The Chief of Police gets on the radio and the cop tells him that he's stopped a limo going a hundred and five. The Chief says, "So bust him!"

 

"I don't think we want to do that, he's really important," said the cop.

 

The Chief exclaimed," All the more reason!"

 

"No, I mean really, really important," said the cop with more persistence.

 

Chief: "Who ya got there, the Mayor?"

Cop: "Bigger."

 

Chief: "The Governor?"

Cop: "Bigger."

 

Chief: "The President?"

Cop: "Bigger."

 

Chief: "Well, who is it?"

Cop: "I think it's God!"

 

Chief: "What?! What makes you think it's God?"

Cop: "He's got the Pope as a chauffeur."

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Re: A Thread for Random Musings

 

Heard an Avril Lavine song at Subway yesterday, something about hating some guy's girlfriend and that he should be with her.

 

I hope to God she writes her own material because otherwise there's someone getting paid for that.

 

 

Granted, the beat was catchy.

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Re: A Thread for Random Musings

 

And in 100 years from now, what will my most enduring legacy be? Shall I be remembered for my struggles against depression? My kind heart? My self-sacrifice? My dry wit? My skill as a GM? My ability to please a woman?

 

Nope.

 

If people are still talking about me in 100 years, even though I never actually said these words...

 

...I'll be remembered as the guy who said that ketchup is a manifestation of the Anti-Christ.

 

 

Check my blog for the full story.

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