Star Wars 8 complaint box

[Badger]

7 hours ago, Ragitsu said:

Also, I must say that the brand of humor endemic to the new Star Wars films is extremely aggravating. The original Star Wars films had humor, but it was subtle. When it came to the prequel trilogy, the comedy was a little more overt yet still mostly restrained. Now, however? We're seeing jokes that try too damn hard and an overabundance of slapstick. It's as if the writers imparted some of their soul into the "humorous" portions of the script so that they could manifest themselves in the actors and mug the camera just to say "Aren't we hip? Huh? Huh?" What's more, this comicality is going to age SO badly; John Boyega's "stereotypical runaway slave meets Kevin Hart" role from The Force Awakens is already showing its crows feet. The obnoxious self-referential nature of the whole experience is akin to what you'd get in a Marvel film. I don't like the Marvel films; why on Earth would I want to see their cheese added to another cinematic recipe?

 

Finally, for the love of whatever gods might exist...STOP CUTTING AWAY TO "CUTE" CGI CRITTERS EVERY GODDAMN FIVE MINUTES! I want to feel real nuanced emotion when I watch a film trying to be an epic: not the helter-skelter duality of thought which accompanies ADHD.

 

 

That seem to be the sort of humor nowadays, people no longer know how to subtle.

 

The sad thing is:  the porgs might have been near to being the most interesting part of the movie.  And as a devoted Ewok killer like me that is painful to say.

 

I certainly liked them better than Vice Admiral "the most incompetent military commander in history".  But, then, hell I liked Rose better than her.

[Ragitsu]

[Badger]

Why, why did you show us that again.

 

In hindsight, definitely a part where the director was in "stick it to Mark Hamill" mode, for the evulz

[dmjalund]

 I think I can summarize my reaction to The Last Jedi:

 

Its as if I went to see a new Back To The Future movie, but instead it was The Butterfly Effect starring Michael J Fox

 

[Ragitsu]

7 minutes ago, Badger said:

Why, why did you show us that again.

 

In hindsight, definitely a part where the director was in "stick it to Mark Hamill" mode, for the evulz

 

The only way that scene would have been scarier/more disturbing is if Luke wandered across a random giant mother Ewok and breastfed from her.

[Old Man]

Must we discuss Badger’s fetishes here?

[Badger]

*drops Old Man into volcano*

[Ragitsu]

On 6/21/2018 at 3:00 AM, Badger said:

*drops Old Man into volcano*

 

"YOU WERE THE CHOSEN ONE!"

[Badger]

2 hours ago, Ragitsu said:

 

"YOU WERE THE CHOSEN ONE!"

 

I never wanted to be the good guy

 

or were you talking about Old Man?

 

Edit: Badger ponders are there good guys in the NGD or simply various levels of evil?

[Badger]

On ‎6‎/‎21‎/‎2018 at 5:30 AM, dmjalund said:

 I think I can summarize my reaction to The Last Jedi:

 

Its as if I went to see a new Back To The Future movie, but instead it was The Butterfly Effect starring Michael J Fox

 

 

I think I can summarize my reaction to the Last Jedi too:

 

"It was as if millions of voices cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced"

 

Note:  Ok, maybe not silenced, they're still screaming but anyhow.

[Vondy]

Honestly, if they had replaced Rose with an Ewok I would have enjoyed the movie more. 

[Badger]

I hated Vice Admiral Von Duntz most of all.  Killing herself was the only good thing she did.

 

Having said that, the way she killed herself,  while clever will make me think with all space battles "Why don't they just...…"

 

Quite honestly, from the chatter, I came in thinking Poe was supposed to have done some dumb things tactically.  While a bit reckless, he actually accomplished SOMETHING.   ANd while mutiny was a bit inexcusable.  Von Duntz plan at that point was "run aimlessly till we die"  and do her damnedest to make sure the crew had absolutely no hope or confidence.  With her decisions the biggest surprise was that the mutiny wasn't larger (assuming meta-gaming by audience members who have already seen the movie isn't taking place).

 

So, Leia and her did do a good job of breaking Poe's confidence in himself as a leader........if that was their goal?  (since he did break and run in the final battle if I remember)

 

Note: Though, Hollywood isn't known for being strong on military knowledge, so you have to give them leeway, I suppose.  But, the whole movie struck me as one endless documentary on "How Not to Military" in that regard.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Vondy]

26 minutes ago, Badger said:

I hated Vice Admiral Von Duntz most of all.  Killing herself was the only good thing she did.

 

My younger daughter (15) jumped up when Holdo died and pumped both arms in the theater yelling "Yes!"

Afterward I asked "You really liked the rebel cruiser jumping to hyperspace right into the dreadnaught. huh?"

She answered, "That was cool, but what I was cheering about was that that annoying biatch died."

 

[Ragitsu]

How sad: Laura Dern went from "Ellie Sattler" to "escaped refugee from a universe that is one part Dr. Seuss and one part Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory".

[Vondy]

26 minutes ago, Ragitsu said:

How sad: Laura Dern went from "Ellie Sattler" to "escaped refugee from a universe that is one part Dr. Seuss and one part Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory".

 

Holdo reminded me of the Fairy Godmother from Shrek, only arrogant, snarky, uninspiring, and witholding

I wouldn't be surprised if Episode IX reavels the Knights of Ren are dark side wielding Oompa-Loompas.

[Vondy]

1 hour ago, Badger said:

 

I think I can summarize my reaction to the Last Jedi too:

 

"It was as if millions of voices cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced"

 

Note:  Ok, maybe not silenced, they're still screaming but anyhow.

 

My cut of the Last Jedi would be: opening scene with Po, all Luke Skywalker scenes, throne room fight scene.

 

The movie would be about 45 minutes long.

[Badger]

Yeah, I couldn't add most of the Luke scenes, due to the character assassination.  So, I guess I got 2 scenes left?   (and the opening scene is marred by a LOT of flaws for me)

 

 

[Old Man]

Those and the breastfeeding scene.

[Badger]

3 minutes ago, Old Man said:

Those and the breastfeeding scene.

 

*ponders why Old Man is fascinated with that scene*

 

*decides some things mortals are best to leave alone*

[Ragitsu]

Another thing...folks here appear to be tiptoeing around another character in this film. Yeah, you know who I'm talking about. Rey. I had no illusions that Star Wars VIII would add dips and slopes to her flatness and it seems that I was wise to not hold out hope. No kidding: I would derive more enjoyment from alternating between watching musca domestica fornicate on the ever-growing blades of grass which constitute my front lawn and gazing at the plodding clouds in the sky above than watch, read, play or even just consume ANY piece of media with Disney's grotesquely unabashed Mary Sue sitting at the protagonist helm. I can't get invested in someone that has nowhere to go. F-N and Poe are so much more interesting. Why couldn't we get John Boyega as a Jedi? Why did the trailers for The Force Awakens have to toy with us like a jilted lover harboring a mile-wide mean streak?

[Trencher]

I can forgive Rey being perfect and a bit bland. Because I like powerful and kind characters. But problem is that this series is becoming more and more like fan fiction inspired young adult books and movies directed at a female audience. 

So not only is she powerful as hell but every characters morality is put around how much or how little they like her. And her relationship with Finn is scrapped to instead focus on Adam Drivers character because in young adult books directed at women the heroine must be with the most powerful man and he must offcourse be good at heart even though he can be a bit rough around the edges. This is a bad fit for Adam Drivers character and Rey to be honest. 

If she is to have a boyfriend I would prefer it would not be a mass murdering psycho. 

[Badger]

1 hour ago, Ragitsu said:

Another thing...folks here appear to be tiptoeing around another character in this film. Yeah, you know who I'm talking about. Rey. I had no illusions that Star Wars VIII would add dips and slopes to her flatness and it seems that I was wise to not hold out hope. No kidding: I would derive more enjoyment from alternating between watching musca domestica fornicate on the ever-growing blades of grass which constitute my front lawn and gazing at the plodding clouds in the sky above ahead than watch, read, play or even just consume ANY piece of media with Disney's grotesquely unabashed Mary Sue sitting at the protagonist helm. I can't get invested in someone that has nowhere to go. F-N and Poe are so much more interesting. Why couldn't we get John Boyega as a Jedi? Why did the trailers for The Force Awakens have to toy with us like a jilted lover harboring a mile-wide mean streak?

 

Hey, yeah she was 3rd most annoying, behind Von Duntz and Rose.   But those other 2 are so bad, Rey's annoyance gets overshadowed.

 

But, I do expect her to go Super Saiyan*, and use the Force to hurl a Death Star into a sun in Ep IX.

 

*And no, I am not implying she has any Saiyan DNA in her either. 

 

[Badger]

1 hour ago, Trencher said:

I can forgive Rey being perfect and a bit bland. Because I like powerful and kind characters. But problem is that this series is becoming more and more like fan fiction inspired young adult books and movies directed at a female audience. 

So not only is she powerful as hell but every characters morality is put around how much or how little they like her. And her relationship with Finn is scrapped to instead focus on Adam Drivers character because in young adult books directed at women the heroine must be with the most powerful man and he must offcourse be good at heart even though he can be a bit rough around the edges. This is a bad fit for Adam Drivers character and Rey to be honest. 

If she is to have a boyfriend I would prefer it would not be a mass murdering psycho. 

 

Yeah, the BF angle would be Finn, maybe Poe  (and given the societal chances they are allegedly are supposed to be taking, surely a interracial relationship cant be too risky?)

 

Note: I did actually like that her heritage was mundane, to an extent.  Would have preferred maybe Jedi ancestry somewhere,  but I definitely did not want her to be another blasted Skywalker (or other character with a close connection to the Skywalker, though given her abilities a no-name Jedi or Force-user would be appropriate)

[Ragitsu]

1 minute ago, Badger said:

 

Yeah, the BF angle would be Finn, maybe Poe  (and given the societal chances they are allegedly are supposed to be taking, surely a interracial relationship cant be too risky?)

 

An interracial relationship might not go over well in China.

[Badger]

2 minutes ago, Ragitsu said:

 

An interracial relationship might not go over well in China.

 

True, though China was really avoiding Solo like the plague, if I heard right.  So, they may have lost China anyway.

 

Note: Though, I did think the Chinese were more concerned with their own not mingling with all the other races (AKA everything not Chinese)