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Random Television Quotes

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I almost feel like people should put the show they get these quotes from, but that might be cheating, but I spend a lot of time copy and pasting to find out what show it is (maybe 25%, unlike the movie one, where it might be 5%)

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"Donald, you can't be serious about this crazy idea. There's no profit in it."

"But I've already enlisted, Uncle Scrooge. I wanna see the world!:

"So I'll buy you a globe."


"If Duckburg studios is going to survive, Major Courage is going to need a major overhaul."

"Uh... How major?"

"Major major, Major."

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All from the same show, same character:


Okay, who gave Fargo a gun?


I know that you have a device that can...create a wormhole, or, uh, bend time, or make you invisible...or a wormholing, time-bending, invisibling device, that shields you from the mind.


[armed with a flamethrower] Unless you want me to roast your chestnuts, back off!


In a town full of super geniuses, why is it that the pizza guy is the only guy with the presence of mind to walk out the door?!


Taggart said the combustion was caused by meson particles coming from a solar flare. I'm no astrophysicist but I don't think there are a lot of solar flares inside a house.


I used to think the same thing. But, uh, they're not lunatics. They're, they're not all luna—there's a fine line between genius and crazy..

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"This isn't about your friends, Robin. It's about you. It's always been about you: sending trouble your way, leaving cryptic clues for you to unravel. I was testing you. For some time now, I've been searching for,...an apprentice. Someone to follow in my footsteps. And, Robin, I've chosen you. Congratulations."


"The makers of Azarath and Metrion are proud to introduce: Zinthos. New and improved Zinthos gives you exactly what you need, exactly when you need it. And because it's blue, Zinthos goes with everything. Zinthos isn't right for everyone and may cause bloating, cramping, hair loss, disturbing visions, fits of rage, and growth of additional eyes. Children under three should not be exposed to Zinthos. Do not get Zinthos wet, and never feed it after midnight. If you experience trouble meditating, stop saying Zinthos and consult your ancient scrolls immediately. New, Blue, Zinthos."

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