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Weapons of opportunity table


archer

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  1. Stick/Log for the fireplace
  2. Rock/Paperweight
  3. Horseshoe
  4. Chair
  5. Beer mug
  6. Candlestick/Lamp/Lantern
  7. Kitchen knife
  8. Bucket/Chamberpot
  9. Rake/Hoe (note the "e")
  10. Scythe/Sickle
  11. Pitchfork (devil detached)
  12. Anvil
  13. Book
  14. Shovel
  15. Skull/Bone
  16. Rope/Sash/Belt
  17. Poker
  18. Screwdriver/Other mixed drink
  19. One of those miniature Eiffel Towers that everyone buys in Paris
  20. Musical instrument, roll 1d8:
    1. Flute
    2. Lute
    3. Guitar
    4. Viola
    5. Trombone
    6. Piano (upright)
    7. Piano (grand)
    8. Theremin
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21. Pencils or pens

22. Silverware

23. Dishes (you could do a whole subset just on the kitchen. Do you remember James Bond getting attacked with an electric carving knife? The disarm for that was to reach out with his foot and unplug it!)

24. Since you already veered away from fantasy with the Eiffel Tower, a remote control would be a good weapon.

25. Shoe/Boot

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The Eiffel Tower can be replaced with the souvenir of your choice. Obviously a table can't account for every possible trophy or keepsake from every possible world.

 

If you go into the house of a traveler, you might find an Eiffel Tower. If you go into the home of a Catholic, you might find the statue of a saint or a cross.

 

If you go into the home of a hobbit...well, you might need a whole sub-table of foodstuff that would be found throughout the house. Brie from Bree might be a suitable souvenir, at least for a few days.

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2 hours ago, archer said:

If you go into the home of a hobbit...well, you might need a whole sub-table of foodstuff that would be found throughout the house. Brie from Bree might be a suitable souvenir, at least for a few days.

 

In a hobbit house, you might find a sausage big enough to club someone, or cheese hard enough to cut someone. A very sharp cheese indeed!

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11 hours ago, Brian Stanfield said:

 

In a hobbit house, you might find a sausage big enough to club someone, or cheese hard enough to cut someone. A very sharp cheese indeed!

 

I've heard of, but not seen, a British comedy show sketch about Ecky-Thump (spelling uncertain), the "ancient Welsh martial art of fighting with a black pudding." I assume that means wielding a black pudding, though I cannot swear to it.

 

CORRECTION! Remembering this prompted me to look it up. It is the Lancastrian martial art of wielding a black pudding, and was revealed on the show The Goodies, in an episode called Kung Fu Kapers. But my attempts to paste in the Wikipedia link are not working..

 

Dean Shomshak

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There might be some people reading this who aren't familiar with The Goodies. (Some might be unfamiliar with Monty Python too, but there's no help for them.)

 

Anyway, the actors in The Goodies were contemporaries and friends of the Monty Python crew. The latter used to troll them for The Goodies being a "kids' show", but it was meant in good humour.

 

If there is any doubt about the comedic talents of the Goodies actors, here is one of them (Tim Brooke-Taylor) in a sketch he co-wrote with his fellow actors - John Cleese, Graham Chapman and Marty Feldman. This was the original version of the sketch. Monty Python did it many times afterwards.

 

This

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  • 2 weeks later...

Flag standard. 

Pre-1990 Telephone. 

Table Lamp. 

Standing Lamp. 

Tire Iron

Wrench. 

Hammer. 

brass candle stick. 

Box cutter

straight Razor. 

Hardback book (6e)

frozen dinner

computer monitor (old tube type)

computer monitor ( new large OLED type)

printer. 

Plastic office cart. 

 

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15 minutes ago, Duke Bushido said:

 

 

Geez, Scott.  

 

That's an upgrade to killing attack right there!  :lol:

 

 

 

I reacted more strongly to his idea of using Hardback book (6e). You might as well put a two-handed battleaxe into the environment.

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I recall my father's first car phone with all of the attached equipment being heavy enough to require two hands to move around.

 

STR MIN 15, 6d6 N damage, ablative weapon - each hit degrades the weapon until it's a bag full of broken parts and dangling wires.

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