Pleet Roodlepleen's Intergalactic Bestiary

[tkdguy]

9 hours ago, Jkeown said:

As a running joke in my 2600CE game there are 37 planets named Argos. I don't know how or why it started. I think I mentioned two entirely different worlds and a player called me on it. I hastily improvised a stupid story about prankster astrocartographers, bored pioneers, and some fairly shoddy interstellar communication. It stuck.

 

 

Just say it's a default name for certain locations. For example, Oak Street will be the default name if you need your players to go somewhere. No matter where in the world they may be, there's always an Oak Street for them to be in or go to.

[Jkeown]

True. My next campaign, which was supposed to start today until a migraine decided to join the group will start on Argos (the one in Ophiuchus). Had to cancel with 2 hours notice.

But that's the syntax. Most other references read "Sector/Planet" but no one ever says "Ophiuchus/Argos" they say Argos (the one in [Sector]). 

 

Maybe worlds are just "Argos" until they are something else, as you suggest?  

[Jkeown]

Zervoids

The Zervoids are a race of callous, scheming worms with mismatched legs, jumbled “facial” features, questionable morals and nowhere-to-be-seen table manners.

Each Zervoid seems a cobbled-together jumble of bits of different bugs. Their overall form is that of a short, stumpy, disgruntled Myriapoda.

They favor darkness, having evolved under the crustal plates of their home world, Dank. Crawling around in the dark and cold for millions of years forged the Zervoids into many forms and functions.

My latest encounter with this surly race was thankfully in deep space. We sent out a White Radio Signal 7 hoping for a rescue attempt after a disastrous experiment left half our ship in the Astral and the other half in dire peril.  

Our savior’s ship precipitated out of hyperspace looking as if it had stopped too suddenly and the drive section had shoved itself into the cargo bay, forcing the living quarters up under where the bridge should have been and that bit was forced forward on some kind of boom. It outgassed for a moment, contracting slightly before communications were opened.

The slavering captain and his crew of arthropod asshats began by asking a fee for the rescue. We explained that any of our liquid assets were now floating through etherical non-space.

It was true. We had like 2,126 standard liters of whiskey back there.

After negotiating an almost reasonable price, they boarded us and checked the wounded, analyzed damage, and queried credit scores. Satisfied that we could pay, the first officer met me on the bridge.

In its hissing, slobbering tongue, the thing requested his payment up front. I struggled to understand him, my knowledge of Zervoid deservedly limited.

“Athtachlasss’huf.” It garbled.

“I’ll have it for you when we make port at Skrapyard Farms,” for once, this was true, “I have nothing on board.”

"Eesthlaa’a uac naaaass.” at least I think that’s how you spell “Then we take the ship.” in Zervoid.  

“I’d prefer a tow.” I strongly demanded with the same boldness and confidence you’d ask your grandmother for a second cookie.

It wasn’t having it. It kind of spit into its comm-unit and a moist reply came back, wet, crackling, and raspy.

“Usk…Nhal…Vrap…Gha-“

I handed over the mag-cards to the spare drive coil storage and the ship’s locker. It spat again and the countdown stopped.

“Pleasure doing business with you.” It intoned in perfect Standard.

----------------------------

Like Hex-Wolf, the Zervoids have a weapon listed. They should pay points or not depending on your campaign. 

 

Zervoid.hdc

[Jkeown]

Goo Girls

The Goo Girls of Regula Slimefax are an amorphous lifeform with a semi-solid rest state. That is to say, they look like transparent, candy-colored female Humans but are in fact able to move through cracks, grates, and enter any place not fully sealed off from the outside. This makes them excellent infiltrators. Any equipment they might carry is left behind when they discorporate. It’s also kind gooey afterward. Loot if you want, but carry wipes.

It is interesting to note that Goo Girls all resemble Chlamydia Smithereens, a Tribal Seeker After Knowledge lost in the Regula Volumes some hundred or so years ago. Many Goo Girls wander away from home to slop around the galaxy, looking at stuff. 

I ran into a Goo Girl on Ophiuchus/Pridax Minor. It was my routine to run around the starport there (little more than a bare patch of rock with a "radio shack" and a gift shop/fuel/life support store) for a bit of exercise each morning. Turning a corner, I passed through a Goo Girl and carried her a few dozen feet. In truth, I was running away. When I finally stopped she was flung off and splattered across the "landing pad" with a sound like an amorphous female shot through the air and landing on bare rock.

 

We traveled together for a time, she and I. You could say she was quite attached to me. 

 

[Jeffery's Note: DO NOT GOOGLE "GOO GIRL." I DID IT TO SEE IF THERE WAS A PRECEDENT FOR THIS IDEA AND I REGRET IT DEEPLY]

Goo Girl.hdc

[Jkeown]

Kadu

Kadu resemble nothing so much as a nautilus with a plasma cannon protruding from its tentacles. They are huge creatures, the size of a medium starship.

The first thing you notice about a Kadu (right after you finish screaming and changing your pants) is the great spiraling shell of the beast, decorated with flowing bio-luminescent whorls and stripes. The tentacles are next, followed by that gun.

What a monster that gun is, powerful enough to shred starship armor, it sticks out almost obscenely from the tangle of tentacles. It also glows brightly across the spectrum, mostly in the infrared.

It has been suggested that Kadu could not have evolved naturally. This is plainly obvious. Self-replicating polymers like Kadu DNA would be torn down by ultraviolet radiation before they could develop cell walls and cytoplasm.  The scarcity of food in a vacuum also presents a problem evolution would have to overcome.

It is therefore correct to conclude that they were provolved in the deep past by some alien super-race such as the eons-old Forerunners, long-dead Rhal Shee Dha, or the Benefactors of the last few thousand years. If this is indeed the case, it tells us at least one thing about the ancients. They were dicks.

Related functionally to the Archangels, Auto-Wars, Bio-Destruct-os and Vacc-Blasters; Kadu are uplifted sea creatures certainly designed for war in space. That they have outlasted their creators is a testament to the wisdom of such technology.

Kadu are quite the sight, flying in formation against the black star-studded void of deep space. They can be seen chasing swarms of rock munchers, snacking on planetary rings or derelict starships. They are also quite the sight when dining on a not-so-derelict ship (or mine, specifically).

They are sensitive to infrared wavelengths, known for its ability to penetrate dust clouds. Star Whales are often found in molecular clouds and ring systems, and are best detected in the IR.    

Attempts to breed such beasts in captivity have been universal failures. Such efforts have resulted in fourteen destroyed orbital habitats, nine ring-stations and seven major lawsuits. Two of which are still affecting my credit score and dating fitness on Malabar/Hlevakha.

Of all the evolutionary drivers, provolve technology is the most difficult, sexual selection is perhaps the most complex, with financial selection being the most depressing.

There are rumors whispered quietly in seedy star town bars, and screamed aloud in seedy star town asylums, of "Old Galactic Kadu" the size of Union dreadnoughts.

Don't go outside, is what I'm saying.   

Kadu.hdc

Edited September 1, 2019 by Jkeown
Start Town?

[Jkeown]

I want to turn all of this, and the other 135 entries, into a giant Space Bestiary product, but I can't get a response from HERO Games. 

[Lawnmower Boy]

On 9/5/2019 at 4:07 AM, Jkeown said:

I want to turn all of this, and the other 135 entries, into a giant Space Bestiary product, but I can't get a response from HERO Games. 

Oh, come on. Would you do business with Pleet Roodlepleen?

[Jkeown]

 

On 9/7/2019 at 12:17 PM, Lawnmower Boy said:

Oh, come on. Would you do business with Pleet Roodlepleen?

Nope.

[Carl Chmielewski]

Would love to see that Bestiary if it is still running around.

[Jkeown]

I haven't worked on it in a while. I'll see if I can crank a few more write-ups out this week for you. 

 

[Jkeown]

I'm back to working on this thing. There are so many creatures, things and people in the Galaxy. As it has been said, some of the things are people. 

 

I think the intelligent races are just going to get Racial Templates instead of full entries. 

[Jkeown]

Here's a taste of today's barely-comprehensible keyboard pounding and caffeine-fueled pseudoscience.

Floaterax.pdf Floaterax.hdc