Ragitsu

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This has become a tense conversation of Morse Code.

No umbrage, I've given mustache wax to several folks at work to assist them with their handlebars.

My go-to used to be Firehouse Moustache Wax in the Tacky version, it gives a very firm hold that's waterproof and can last into the next day. It needs to be warmed slightly before application, or it can yank hairs. My profile photo is with the Tacky wax, but brushed out on the second day. It's a dark wax, and can yellow grey or white hair, though. https://www.firehousemoustachewax.com/

My daily driver right now is from Dubs Was Here. I use the Bayrummer scent, and it's easy to apply. Hold is very good, but not quite as strong as the Firehouse product, and it sometimes requires touching up later in the day. It makes tighter loops than the Firehouse, and can be easily brushed out, but still provide some shaping. https://dubswashere.com/

One of the folks that I helped at work had started with the Firehouse, but his mustache and beard was completely white, so the Tacky would discolor it slightly. His go-to ended up being a glue stick, which worked amazingly well for him. 

I avoid Clubman wax, as it doesn't hold very well in the Vegas climate, and had a tendency to foam if it got wet.

I've tried both Mountaineer and Badass Beards mustache wax, but neither had the hold I was looking for. They're both really good for beard supplies, though. https://www.mountaineerbrand.com/  and https://badassbeardcare.com/

"Help me!  I'm melll-tingggg...."

... This is true.

You're the third guy that chose H20! Anyhow, I recommend "Reed's"; Canada Dry - at least, nowadays - places more emphasis on sugar than actual spice. Reed's regular ale is sharp, but their beer is even stronger (you may want to dilute it with lemonade or another comparable sweetened citrus juice).

Used to drink an unhealthy amount of soda, and I've tried over the years to cut that back in a meaningful way. As far as ginger ale goes there was one brand Fiery that I enjoyed a lot, but they went out of business. What about you? 

I've taken a shine to San Pellegrino's sparkling drinks; their Grapefruit ("Pompelmo") flavor is fantastic...and that's the Nestle (i.e., slightly cheaper) variety. The original version contains more fruit juice and less added sugar; furthermore, the can - in addition to being slightly shorter yet wider - features a protective foil cover. Assuming citrus is on the menu at your household, give it a shot.

Agreed; but what brought that on?

Self deprecation or proud racist.  It's all in the usage, but at best it's the same as having a license plate that reads "CAUCASIAN".  Like... why?

D'aw, thank you. 

Did you get that from InspiroBot, or is it your own observation? 

I am merely echoing the sentiment; it is far from an original belief. To clarify: by "pointless existence" I mean a sapient life that isn't assigned a grand plan by a nebulous cosmic force or tied to a prearranged path decided by a deity (pick one...). There are those who wish to have the course of their lives dictated by an external force that is fundamental to all of existence, but I - personally - find the notion either terrifying (at worst) or depressing (at best). Why are some people seemingly destined to greatly suffer and/or cause suffering for others? "Life is unfair" is right; I'd hate for this - in the aggregate - to be considered "fair" or "just".

At least we have the freedom to make our own meaning. Granted, there are still financial, social, physiological and psychological barriers...yet it is still preferable to an existence that amounts to little more than a pawn (no matter how benign intentions end up being). If this is all going to turn out well "in the end", why the messy interim?

This is very true. 

Oh, that is cool!

Nope.