Battlestaff

Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat
 

"Crikey, there it is! We've found the legendary Big Purple Dinosaur! Maybe if I dangle my baby in front of it, I can distract it long enough to capture it!"
 
NT: You are making a parody of various Hong Kong martial arts movies. What is the name for your main characters "special" martial arts ability?

Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat
 

 
"Ok, we have War, Pestilence, Famine, Death and....Taxes?"

Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat
 
"This may seem like a setback but actually my master plan is even closer to...to- aw who am I kidding. I got nothing."
 
 
 
 
NT: Songs your favorite band probably shouldn't sing.

Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat
 

 
"I've defeated Saddam Hussein!"
 
"Congrataulations! Now you can rule Iraq!"

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We need to focus the war on terror...Okay, Dick, you're gonna be Quaddafi, I'll be Hussein and Laura honey, you'll be Bin Laden...

Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat
 

She sits and talks with you for hours about things she and her friend Barb, have done. Only later do you realize she's talking about a Barbie doll.

Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat
 

"Attention, passengers... Passengers, your attention please.
Now, nobody panic- I repeat, don't panic!- but...
does anybody on board happen to know how to fly an airplane?"

Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat
 

Rand will realize running around feeling sorry for himself is boring, and will actually start doing something. All the other characters will realize that once Rand starts taking a proactive stance, all their power means nothing, and will finally listen to someone besides their own egos.
 
Oh, wait, these are supposed to be funny......
 
Rand will go into the final battle wielding the magic sword he captured, only to face a foe in black armor, wielding a sword of red light, who tries to tell Rand that he is really Rand's father.....

Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat
 

 
"You're looking for that Amish guy? Last time I saw him, he, his family, and their mule powered wagon were picnicing outside the gas station and laughing at the folks at the pump..."

Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat
 

He's had success going up the middle so far, but when he tried to go around the back he was stopped by a tight end.

Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat
 

Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat
 
"We were fortunate to have depth and nuance in our lead actor..."
 
NT: Last thing said before a computer bites the dust

Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat
 
my wife left me, can I hold yours?
 
NT: Worlds greatest scientist

Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat
 
You will note Jim and Bob who have arrived wearing only boxer shorts. They wish it to be known that they are Premature Ejaculations. Yup, they have come in their pants.

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I can't believe they're letting me work with children again! that's your first lesson, kiddies--get a good lawyer!

Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat
 
"Supreme executive power rests in a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony...wait, maybe we SHOULD try it the other way."

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One of these Phlems is not like the other...

Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat
 

I havent't liked Bruce Willis ever since he made that snuff porno. You know, 'Die Hard.'

Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat
 
Marvin: So what? You pussies gonna actually start punching people again? Cripes, Batman didn't even teach me aikido or judo. Hello! No super powers... I NEED frickin' martial arts!
 
Wendy: Step off, Marvin. Let's go to Image. Here, take this thighmaster and these steroids. I hear they need an archer.
 
Marvin: Yeah, noogies. That's right. You don't have Super Marvin to kick around anymore. Now you gonna be dealin' with a cool guy. Shaft. Yeah. I'm one bad...
 
Wendy: Shut your mouth and let's go.

Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat
 

 
Steve Long on a water tower outside a convention with a sniper rifle
"You want CLOWN back huh? Well... CLOWN this!" *Bang*
"Right in the funny bone...You laughing now, Fanboy??!"

Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat
 

 
"So, we're combining Hybrid and FATAL, and to make it hip to the kids we're adding a TCG element, using concepts from Yu-Gi-Oh and Doctor WHO. Now, whoever can do the best impersonation of a yak in heat goes first, then rolls the d10000 to see how many spaces he moves ... oh, yeah, licensing also gave us the rights to Jar Jar Binks, those short guys from Lord of the Rings, and something called a 'Wonder Twins' for use as game elements."

Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat
 

This SUV won't make your penis larger.
 
Look for Richard Cheese's version of Closer

Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat
 
Yes cosmetic surgery and our beauty products can make a whole new you. But the procedures can go wrong, you could be scarred for life or die and you could even have an allergic reaction to the products and suffer appallingly.
But hey ! We'll get rich and go on doing so while we make you feel inadequate.
 
NT: Things Americans believe about foreigners but are way off base.

Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat
 

 
 
This show has a large fan following, but it is not our target demographic. We need to cancel it.
 
 
Wild conspiracy theories that make you laugh.

Re: f/u Grab: Throwing & Squeezing after initial Grab
 
I'm not sure I understand what you mean by "either" roll. If a character attempts a Grab and misses, he's never going to get to the "Throw" stage of things in the first place, so the Throw rules don't come into play. Only if the character has to make an Attack Roll with his Throw -- either to perform it at all, or if he's trying to hit a specific target with the Thrown character/object -- are the "miss" rules going to come into play.
 
If what you're asking is, "Can a character Throw a Grabbed person in an effort to hit another target (such as another character or a specific hex), miss that target, but still inflict Throw damage on the Thrown person?", then the answer is "No." There aren't any provisions in the rules for that; a miss is a miss. The GM could alter that if he likes, but generally the rules don't let a character miss/fail and still obtain some measure of success.