Hyper-Man reacted in A Thread for Random Musings
Re: A Thread for Random Musings
An elderly couple is enjoying an anniversary dinner together in a small
The husband leans over and asks his wife, "Do you remember the first time we
had sex together over fifty years ago? We went behind this tavern where you
leaned against the fence and I made love to you."
"Yes," she says, "I remember it well."
"OK," he says, "how about taking a stroll round there again and we can do it
for old time's sake?"
"Oooooooh Henry, you devil, that sounds like a good idea," she answers.
There's a police officer sitting in the next booth listening to all this, and
having a chuckle to himself. He thinks, "I've got to see these two old-
timers having sex against a fence. I'll just keep an eye on them so there's no
So he follows them. They walk haltingly along,
leaning on each other for support, aided by walking sticks.
Finally they get to the back of the tavern and make their way to the fence.
The old lady lifts
her skirt, takes her knickers down and the old man drops his trousers. She
turns around and as she hangs on to the fence, the old man moves in.
Suddenly they erupt into the most furious sex that the watching policeman has
They are bucking and jumping like eighteen-year-olds. This goes on for about
forty minutes! She's yelling, "Ohhh, God!" He's hanging on to her hips for
This is the most athletic sex imaginable. Finally, they both collapse panting
on the ground.
The policeman is amazed. He thinks he has learned something about life that
he didn't know.
After about half an hour of lying on the ground recovering, the old couple
struggle to their feet and put their clothes back on.
The policeman, still watching thinks, that was truly amazing, he was going
like a train. I've got to ask him what his secret is.
As the couple passes, he says to them, "That was something else!
You must have been having sex for about forty minutes. How do you manage it?
You must have had a fantastic life together. Is there some sort of secret?"
The old man says,
"Fifty years ago that wasn't an electric fence."
Hyper-Man reacted to Trebuchet in Miniaturized Manufacturing Units?
Star Hero discusses these as a way to provide the essentials for a starship's crew and passengers such as food, clothing and other consumables. They are essentially the same idea as Star Trek's replicators. Anyone have any input as to how to build one in HERO? I was thinking maybe Summon, but that seems terribly awkward.
Hyper-Man reacted to AslanC in Superhero Images
Re: Superhero Images
After a particularily nasty fight with the PCs, a severed powercable from his frost-pack resulted in an exposion and a mutation to living ice for Frostbite... No longer a laughing matter or the joke of Ravage 5 he is now a ice cold killer.
Hyper-Man reacted to Hugh Neilson in Cost of strength vs. benefit
Re: Cost of strength vs. benefit
The point structures can only be out of whack in relation to one another. There is no absolute against which they can be compared. If you eliminate frameworks, it will have an impact on the relative efficiencies of various concepts. Those that would not use frameworks anyway become more efficient compared to those that would. If you do nothing but increease the price of STR, characters who rely on STR, like Bricks, will be disadvantaged as compared to other characters who are not reliant on buying STR.
This is a completely separate issue from whether the present structure is, in fact, balanced. If one accepts that STR is underpriced under the current structure, raising it to an appropriate level would remove an advantage enjoyed by bricks, and is fair. If one accepts it is competetively priced with other options in the system, raising its price results in bricks being competetively disadvantaged, and thus is unfair. If one acepots STR is overpriced (good luck finding the supporter for that position!) then lowering its cost removes an unfair disadvantage suffered by bricks.
Hyper-Man reacted to death tribble in A Thread for Random Musings
Re: A Thread for Random Musings
If you look at Mentor's current avatar you can see me in my first actual job.
And for those of you befuddled it shows Mr Shatner in the Trouble with Tribbles episode covered in Tribbles.
One of them is me.
I do hope that Mentor got a release for that photo as lawyers can be pretty picky about that sort of thing. My image doesn't grace just about anything.
Hyper-Man reacted to Pegasus in Longest Running Thread EVER
Re: Longest Running Thread EVER
I can see it on the Convention Horror Stories thread now:
I love going to cons dressed up! I have this chainmail bikini, it says its supposed to be a size 5, but with a few minor adjustments I find it can hold a woman 4 times that size! The only problem is when it the links grab onto my chest hairs--ouch! So anyway, I'm at the con in my chainmail bikini and my cat ears (meow!) and there's this guy following me everywhere! He won't tell me his name, only that he is "Mighty!" I mean, he's dressed like Barney Fife with a big clown nose and he's carrying this inflatable sheep. What a freak! Anyway, long story short...I wake and he's gone leaving nothing but a half deflated sheep, and I can't reach the key to the handcuffs. And the peanut butter is starting to itch! But the worst part is, he won't call me! Please, Mighty, call me! I need you...
Hyper-Man reacted to Super Squirrel in Longest Running Thread EVER
Re: Longest Running Thread EVER
Our group is evil. It started from a discussion on how to make our GM cry. We talked about a ghost busters storage facility and the link above is our end result.
Hyper-Man reacted to Old Man in The cranky thread
Re: The cranky thread
Dinner should not be the ordeal that it was last night.
"What do you want to do for dinner?"
"Well, we haven't got anything I want to eat in the house, so let's go out somewhere."
"Okay. Oh I know, we have a coupon for TGI Friday's. Plus we can get healthy food there."
"Sounds good. Let's go there."
"Or we could go to Cheesecake Factory, since it's an off night it won't be crowded."
"Do we have a coupon for Cheesecake Factory?"
"No, but it's healthy."
"With a name like 'Cheesecake Factory'?"
"Don't make fun."
"Well, it is funny."
"So you want to go to TGI Friday's, then?"
"I really don't care one way or the other, but we do have a coupon for TGI Friday's. But if you would rather go to Cheescake Factory, we can go there."
"Okay, let's go to Friday's."
(five minutes elapse)
"Can you call Cheesecake Factory and find out what time they close?"
"I thought we were going to Friday's."
"Well, I want to go to Cheesecake Factory."
*sigh* "Okay, I'll call." (thinking, why the hell am I the one who has to call?) "They close at 11, and the wait is half an hour."
"Okay, let's go there."
"Okay, we're going to Cheesecake Factory. Let's get ready."
"Will you hurry up? I'm starving!"
(Old Man gets dressed inside of two minutes and is waiting by the front door, keys in hand. Time elapses.)
"I have nothing to wear!"
"Nothing to wear? You've got a three foot stack of clean laundry right there."
"But I'm too faaaaat! Nothing fits me!"
"What's wrong with that skirt you're wearing?"
"Look at how tight it is!"
"Um... okay. Well, isn't there something else in the stack, or in the closet, or in the dresser, that you can wear?"
"Can't we just stay in and eat something?"
"But there's nothing here I wanted to eat."
"We can have noodles."
"There's no protein in noodles."
"We can have salad."
"There's no protein in salad."
"Well, can you just go out and pick something up?"
"Sure. Okay. What should I pick up?"
"Well, what do you feel like?"
"I just want chicken, or meat, or something."
"I know. We have a coupon for KFC."
"Okay. I will go pick up dinner from KFC. What do you want me to get you?"
"Tender Roast sandwich and fries. And corn. And coleslaw. And mashed potatoes?"
"Isn't that a lot of food?" ("Fat" girl?)
"But I need my veggies."
"Potatoes are not a vegetable, they're a starch. Besides you don't like the gravy anyway."
"All right, I won't get the mashed potatoes. Just the corn and the coleslaw."
"Okay, I'll be right back."
"Why don't I just come with you?"
(A long drive ensues, made longer by a water main break that has forced the closure of one KFC, as well as plenty of unwanted driving commands from the passenger seat.)
"Change lanes. Change lanes. Why aren't you changing lanes?"
"Mostly because there's an SUV in the way, sweetheart."
"It's faster if you go that way."
"You should tell me these things before we're halfway through the intersection."
"Just turn left, and turn left again."
"Across the busiest six-lane road in the city? No, that's okay, we'll go around."
"I'm a much better driver than you."
(finally KFC is reached. Old Man enters and orders the food. A young Russian named Vasily rushes about in the back, assembling the sandwiches, while Lois, the nice lady behind the register, forces me to try a new Roasted Chicken Strip while I wait. It's not bad. Eventually I collect the food and head back to the car. Soon we're on our way home. But not home free...)
"You eat too much fried food."
"You eat too much fried food. It's not healthy."
"One chicken sandwich a week isn't gonna kill me."
"How many times have you gone to KFC this week?"
"Okay. But you still got the fries."
"You wanted the fries. I got them for you. Besides the coupon was for the combo so we were stuck with the fries anyway."
"You still need to eat less fried food."