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I figure we could all use a good laugh, and this is the best I've seen all Election Day.

EDIT: Source for the regaining of contact

If Vincent Van Gogh was Batman.  .  .

There was a train driver in Bulgaria.
 
He loved his job. Driving a train had been his dream ever since he was a child. He loved to make the train go as fast as possible. Unfortunately, one day he was a little too reckless and caused a crash. He made it out, but a single person died.
 
Well, needless to say, he went to court over this incident. He was found guilty, and was sentenced to death by electrocution.
 
When the day of the execution came, he requested a single banana as his last meal. After eating the banana, he was strapped into the electric chair. The switch was flown, sparks flew, and smoke filled the air - but nothing happened. The man was perfectly fine.
 
Well, at the time, there was an old Bulgarian law that said a failed execution was a sign of divine intervention, so the man was allowed to go free.
 
Somehow, he managed to get his old job back driving the train. Having not learned his lesson at all, he went right back to driving the train with reckless abandon. Once again, he caused a train to crash, this time killing two people. The trial went much the same as the first, resulting in a sentence of execution.
 
For his final meal, the man requested two bananas. After eating the bananas, he was strapped into the electric chair. The switch was thrown, sparks flew, smoke filled the room - and the man was once again unharmed. Well, this of course meant that he was free to go.
 
And once again, he somehow managed to get his old job back. To what should have been the surprise of no one, he crashed yet another train and killed three people. And so he once again found himself being sentenced to death.
 
On the day of his execution, he requested his final meal: three bananas. "You know what? No," said the executioner. "I've had it with you and your stupid bananas and walking out of here unharmed. I'm not giving you a thing to eat; we're strapping you in and doing this now." Well, it was against protocol, but the man was strapped in to the electric chair without a last meal.
 
The switch was pulled, sparks flew, smoke filled the room - and the man was still unharmed. The executioner was speechless.
 
The man looked at the executioner and said, "Oh, the bananas had nothing to do with it. I'm just a bad conductor."

My wife asked me if I could clear the kitchen table.
 
I had to get a running start but I made it!

According to my sewing instructor, I'm easily the worse student She's ever had...
 
Oops... sorry, wrong thread.

If Vincent Van Gogh was Batman.  .  .

If Vincent Van Gogh was Batman.  .  .

It would have been really NSFW if she'd exposed an ankle in the last panel.

Which is good, because some of the failure modes of rocket pants are frightening to think about.

The accuracy! 
 

Spoilered for NSFW
 
[spoiler]http://www.harkavagrant.com/history/draculasm.png[/spoiler]

The older I get, the more I find myself relating to these guys.
 

Ugh, I utterly despised the MCU Spider-man movie.  I actually didn't watch Far From Home because I despised the first one so much, I actually walked out in the middle of it because I disliked it so much.  Barely competent Spidey would be bad enough but condescending abusive Tony Stark was a step to far.  

How come Batman shampoo exists...
 
But not Conditioner Gordon?

I don’t know why Donald Trump wants four more years.
 
He can’t even handle 60 minutes.

That doesn't look like Aflac.  It doesn't even look like Matt Damon.

Quoted For The Mother-Lovin' TRUTH!

Quoted For The Mother-Lovin' TRUTH!

I have to disagree. This election isn't just a referendum on the President, and on the GOP, but on "Trumpism," his entire approach to politics that has so corrupted the American government and divided the American people. Trump and the Republican incumbents have to be so thoroughly trounced that it's clear the great majority of Americans repudiate Trumpism. Nothing less will quiet all but their most fanatical followers, and reassure the rest of the world that the last four years don't represent what America stands for. Otherwise there will be no domestic peace going forward, and the standing of the USA in the world may never recover.