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Ockham's Spoon

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Ockham's Spoon last won the day on June 15

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  • Location
    Charlottesville
  • Occupation
    Engineering professor

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  1. Two mafia hit-men are walking deep in the woods in the middle of the night. One of the says "This forest is kinda spooky. I gotta admit I am a little scared." The other replies "You're scared? I'm the one who is going to have to walk back alone!"
  2. I don't mean to brag, but it only took me one week to finish a jigsaw puzzle even though the box said 2 to 4 years
  3. When I am an old man with grandchildren, I will tell them about the great toilet paper shortage of 2020 when we had drag our butts across the lawn to wipe them, In the snow, Uphill, both ways, Dodging murder hornets
  4. Two guys, one in a green jacket and one in a blue jacket, are arguing over which of them is more badass. As they pass a bakery, the guy in blue dares the guy in green to steal some buns. So Green goes into the bakery, and surreptitiously swipes three buns, stuffs them in his pockets, and saunters back outside. "Okay, now it is your turn." says Green "You're an amateur." says Blue "Watch this." Blue goes into the store and asks the baker if he would like to see a magic trick. The baker agrees. Blue asks him to hold his jacket, and then asks for a bun. The baker takes the jacket and hands Blue the bun. Blue eats the bun and asks for a second. The baker, still holding onto the jacket, gives him a second bun. Blue eats this one also, and asks for one more. The baker, interested to see where this is going, hands him the third bun, which Blue also eats. "Okay, now where is the magic trick?" the baker asks. Blue responds "Go look in the pockets of that guy out there in the green jacket."
  5. A flight attendant asks one of the passengers how he likes his coffee. Fancying himself a player, he says "I like my coffee the way I like my women." The flight attendant responds "Don't worry honey, the coffee is free. You don't have to pay for it here."
  6. The missing posters in this are my favorite detail
  7. A cabbie picks up a nun, but can't stop looking at her. She asks him why he is staring and he says "This is going to sound silly, but I have always wanted to kiss a nun." After a moment's thought, the nun says "Well, I will kiss you, but only if you are single and Catholic." The cabbie says "Great, I'm both!" The nun proceeds to kiss him in a way that would make a hooker blush. When the cabbie gets his breath back he says, "I'm sorry, but I lied. I am actually married and a Baptist." The nun says "That's okay. My name is Kevin and I am on my way to a costume party."
  8. Speaking of Superman and terrible fates, I would posit Christopher Reeves as a superhero if you toss in a mech suit or medical therapy to restore his mobility or even give him super-powers. The exception that proves the rule.
  9. I really only see this coming into play for characters affected by long-term Drains and possibly the odd Transform (although usually those will be covered by BODY recovery). If you use Impairment rules it might crop up as well, but again, once the BODY is healed the impairment should go away. But if you just want to recover quickly from an Enfeeblement ray that sapped your STR or a poison that is depressing your CON, I think using the Regeneration per character point would work just fine. I would even consider letting a character with Regen buy the Expanded Characteristics Advantage from the Adjustment powers on their Regen, so +1/2 advantage for each additional characteristic they wanted to cover past BODY.
  10. Those who confuse the word 'burro' and 'burrow' don't know their ass from a hole in the ground.
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