Jump to content

Pariah

HERO Member
  • Posts

    45,224
  • Joined

  • Last visited

  • Days Won

    196

Everything posted by Pariah

  1. Displacer Beast plushie >> Flerkin plushie
  2. Why did the chicken go to the gym? To work on his pecks.
  3. There was an ancient musical instrument called the Egyptian horn, but almost nobody alive today has ever seen or heard one. It's a toot uncommon.
  4. February 4th 1983: Karen Carpenter died from complications related to anorexia nervosa. I wish that she had been able to get the help that she needed. She was only 32 years old. She had such an amazing voice. Imagine how much more of The Carpenters' music we could have had if she had lived another 20 or 30 years.
  5. Me: "Dude, I'm bored. Text me some good jokes." Him: "Not now. I'm busy with my girlfriend." Me: "Awesome! Send me some more!"
  6. Moonies, maniacs, Marmite eaters, male models, masochists, Mass murders and masseurs
  7. Jingles for payday loan companies and personal injury law firms
  8. Is the NCAA about to get the FA,FO they've been dancing around? SEC, Big Ten 'advisory group' stands as coded threat to NCAA: Figure it out, or we'll go off ourselves
  9. "I love you. You're my Valentine." "For now. But what about when I'm eighty and I'm in a wheelchair on oxygen? You still going to want me?" "Do you think I'm so shallow that I'm going to leave you when you're old? What if I gained a hundred pounds? You going to leave me then?" [beat] "No!" "What's with the pause?" "Well, it's not exactly fair. I mean, I have to get old. You don't have to get fat." "If I want to get fat, I get fat." "Okay, fine. And if you do, I'll be there. You'll see." "Yeah, watch me! Watch me how I get fat! [beat] I can get fat." "And I'll be there."
  10. Isn't that also true for the Suns? And I always thought it was a fiery hoop the dolphin was jumping through. In any case, the five from the source from which I got the question are: Miami Heat Phoenix Suns Calgary Flames Tennessee Titans Miami Dolphins
  11. Okay, newest sports trivia question: Identify the five major North American sports teams whose logos are on fire.
  12. It's all right if you don't have your ducks in a row. Some of us don't even have ducks. Some of us have squirrels hopped up on pixie sticks.
  13. If I were the coach or AD, I'd be tempted to suspend him for several games ... and then list him as a healthy scratch for the rest. And then invite him to my office to talk about the many wonderful opportunities offered by the transfer portal.
  14. "Lord, I'll never pick another pocket again as long as I live. I swear it. But here's the problem: You've got to let me live. How can I prove my good faith to you? If you've heard me, this ledge will remain steady as a rock, and that thing coming at me won't be what I think it is. If it is, there's no hard feelings, of course, but I'd be very disappointed."
  15. "It's too bad she won't live! But then again, who does?"
  16. Last I checked, the WCC is currently projected to place only one team in the Big Dance ... and it's not Gonzaga.
×
×
  • Create New...