Mundane Superhheroes (and Villains!)

[SSgt Baloo]

Re: Mundane Superhheroes (and Villains!)

 

Three before bedtime:

 

Super Santa!

The man who would be Santa was originally a nursing home patient with Alzheimer's. Late one Christmas Eve he was visited by another white-bearded old man who restored his mind (but not his memory) and gave him powers modeled along those reputed to be wielded by Santa Claus. Now this man without a name, who only speaks the words "Ho, ho, ho!" transports to wherever he is needed to oppose those with naughty intentions! If you're a bad-guy you really better watch out! Super Santa is coming to town (and man, is he ever pissed)!

 

Super Santa Can leap to any rooftop without error, anywhere in the world. He can gain entry without alerting any security devices and has been known to beat up known criminals before depositing them on the front porch of an interested police station, wrapped up in a nice, big red cloth bag that always seems just strong enough to prevent escape. He has highly detailed intelligence on any target he decides to focus his attention upon and seems to acquire this knowledge out of thin air.

 

 

Psuper Psychiatrist

Eugene Levitz was a therapist with a small, but thriving practice. Shortly after the Event, he noticed that his patients seemed to be making incredible leaps of progress with every session. Soon, he was out of patients and considering a move to a larger town.

 

While visiting Detroit, he took a wrong turn and found himself lost in what appeared to be a very dangerous neighborhood. Eugene stopped at an alleyway to ask a local citizen for directions. It turns out that the man was a lookout for a gang that was trying to break in to a pawn shop. Eugene talked with the young man, and gradually the gang members began wandering over, prepared to steal this bald white guy blind. That didn't happen. Before long every gang member was hanging on Eugene's every word, wanting to know how to improve his lot in life and become a self-actualizing person.

 

Within an hour, the gang had decided to go straight and join the Guardian Angels. Four members threw away their drugs and drug paraphenalia, vowing to never abuse drugs again. And they didn't! Eugene marveled at how quickly he had been able to convince these thugs that life was good and they had the power to make it so for themselves. He decided to offer his services to the Detroit Police as a counsellor and negotiator.

 

Psuper Psychiatrist is an incredibly optimistic and uplifting speaker, helping people to figure out why they are dissatisfied with life and discovering what they can realistically do to make their lives more fulfilling. Eugene seems to be tuned into some deep well of wisdom that helps people confront their fears, eliminate antisocial tendencies, and generally enjoy life and the company of others.

 

Green Bugzapper

Jean Le Drapeau Noir was backpacking in the wilds of southeastern Alaska during the height of the mosquito season. He had fallen down a hill, losing his backpack with all his insect repellants, mosquito netting, tents, etc. The mosquitos were very quickly driving Jean around the bend when the Event happened. Jean began emitting a greenish glow and giving off noisy little sparks, each one of which seemed to be the death knell of an individual mosquito. Jean cackled gleefully, and began shouting "Wooo-hooo! I am the Green Bugzapper! All vermin fear me, for I am zappy!"

 

Green Bugzapper isn't much of a crime fighter, but has been known to zap violent criminals who prey upon individuals. He hasn't much of an attention span and hasn't been committed to a loony bin only because he's (mostly) harmless unless you're trying to beat someone up or if you happen to be a cloud of stinging or biting insects.