Klytus

Re: Answers & Questions
 

 
Q: What do you use for lubrication when spending 'alone time' in the bathroom?
 
A: There's love in that cake.

Re: Answers & Questions
 

 
Q: Are you waiting for someone? Can I stick my hand down your pants? Is there anything there? What's your favorite sexual aid?
 
A: 200 Billion can't be wrong. Well actually they can.

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER
 
Congratulations.

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
The Perks of Being a Cab Driver
 
In the second part of my cab driving shift today, I got a call to go south, which turned out to be the Sheriff's Department Fingerprinting Office. There I met up with the fare, two rather, uh, well-built women with baggage. I helped them in and said, "are you guys going to the airport?" They said, "no, we just got here from the airport. We need to go to the nearest strip club."
 
Turns out they were both stopping in town to strip at the local clubs during the convention this week and needed to get a referral from at least one of the strip clubs before they could get their cards to work in Nevada. As we drove around, they talked about how dead business is in California, but when they got here they found out they had to get fingerprinted- and pay for that- and get a referral from the employer- and pay for that- then come back to the Sheriff's Office for the cards- and pay for THAT. BEFORE getting hired and making money. I said, "sounds just like being a cab driver."
 
First place they went was closed til 2. Second place gave them a business registration form, but NOT a referral, so we kept driving. By the time I took them to another club way up the street, the meter was $19. They said, "if we come for a referral in this place, they're gonna want us to audition.
 
"Do you want to come in and watch?"
 

 
So... I did. And because it was afternoon, and I was the cab driver, the club let me in with no cover (though I pissed off $7 on overpriced soda and tips just to be customer-ly). End result, I spent almost 2 hours on this, got enough in tips to make up for what I spent, and the girls liked my service enough that they said they might call for my cab number the next time they need a drive.
 
And give me a free lap dance.
 
Both of them.
 

 
JG

Spin-Off: Misinterpretation
 
Spin-Off: Misinterpretation
 

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
Hi. My name's Jack and I'm an alcoholic. Today marks 18 years to the day since my last drink.

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER
 
New "smilies"!!! In no particular order...
 

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
I have one friend who lives nearby that suffers from Depression, and ocassionally needs me to go be with her because no one else (not even her husband) can reach her. I have another friend who had surgery to remove blood-clots, but at the last minute they had to get her permission to approve a proceedure that might have killed her... all without having had the chance to say goodby her her husband and daughter. Another friend of mine had to put down the family dog. Yet another friend of mine has been having serious health-issues with the famly cat.
 
Sometimes, friendship can be a real bear.
 
And I wouldn't give up knowing any of these people for the world.

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
I've come to conclude that "reputation" is only fun when you actually have some. Sitting at home, alone, unable to find work, feeling the energy being sucked out of your soul is bad enough. Seeing your name steadly slide down the scale on the reputation list only makes it worse... especially when you go out of your way to NOT be a post-padding munchkin and only say something when you feel you've got something useful to say. It is a very graphic reminder of just how little effect you have on the world around you - and that is something I do not need at this point in my life.
 
I really wish I could turn the stupid thing off....

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
I've come to conclude that "reputation" is only fun when you actually have some. Sitting at home, alone, unable to find work, feeling the energy being sucked out of your soul is bad enough. Seeing your name steadly slide down the scale on the reputation list only makes it worse... especially when you go out of your way to NOT be a post-padding munchkin and only say something when you feel you've got something useful to say. It is a very graphic reminder of just how little effect you have on the world around you - and that is something I do not need at this point in my life.
 
I really wish I could turn the stupid thing off....

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
I've come to conclude that "reputation" is only fun when you actually have some. Sitting at home, alone, unable to find work, feeling the energy being sucked out of your soul is bad enough. Seeing your name steadly slide down the scale on the reputation list only makes it worse... especially when you go out of your way to NOT be a post-padding munchkin and only say something when you feel you've got something useful to say. It is a very graphic reminder of just how little effect you have on the world around you - and that is something I do not need at this point in my life.
 
I really wish I could turn the stupid thing off....

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
I'm not so sure I'm liking this Reputation, thing. On the one hand, it feels good to see your rep go up steadilly every day. But then again, it sort of hurts to see it sit stagnant for a while. In the end, it shouldn't bother me one way or the other, as I'm not posting for rep, but because I like to. It's a touch of insecurity that makes rep matter, so it shouldn't. But still, I wish the opt-out feature were available.
 
Another thing that does get me, though, something I'm not sorry that it does...
 
When on a thread, I reply to something or make a statement of some sort and someone later down the thread says more-or-less the same thing. So guess which person gets quoted when responding to the topic? I'll give you a hint - it ain't me. That gets to me, because it makes me feel like that people consider the message to be less important than the messenger. Excuse me, but if a good point is a good point, it shouldn't matter WHO brought the point up in the first place. Still, one should give credit where credit is due.
 
I guess this combined with with the whole stupid reputation aspect has been making me feel a tad marginilized as of late - in spite of the fact some people have indicated that "I'm cool" or "I have good ideas" and the like. It sure doesn't feel like it when I am so ignored I may as well be keeping my mouth shut.
 
Then again.. maybe I'm just feeling sorry for myself because I'm still out of work and have nothing better to do with my time then read the boards in between job searches, and being home alone all day with nothing usefull to do and just leaves you alone with your thoughts... and when you're prone to Depression, those thoughts often take dark turns.
 
Eh, don't mind me. I just hope this is "random" enough for the thread...

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
I'm sick of fighting the political fight. I'm sick of blind hate or blind love for President Bush. He's done some good things and he's f--ked up some things, and nothing he's screwed will mean the end of society as we know it. The left's tactics of "say and do anything no matter how morally or logically repugnant to defeat Bush" is driving me slowly insane. The right's obsessive need to display everything Bush has said or done as some holy act beyond criticism is equally causing me the need to piss fire. Nobody wants to be reasonable, and the worst is when I step back and see myself doing it too.
 
Life's too short. I'm addicted to politics and I hate politics and I hate having to defend what should be obvious. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
 

 
I'm not in a happy place right now.

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
Ok - being out of work truly blucks (blows and sucks). We're covered that part. But many good things have happened as well.
 
First of all, the outpouring of support from my friends has been tremendous and wonderful. Not just people giving me sympathy and support, but asking for my resume to hand it off to folks they know while dropping a good word in their ear about me. That really means a lot when you see people actually putting their money where their mouths are when it comes to being a friend.
 
Next, while I am down about my situation, I am not letting it *keep* me down in all other things. Yeah, I've slipped a few times, but over-all, my mood is good, and I'm staying strong.
 
So for now, things are going rather well. Let us hope that this doesn't turn around to bite me on the ass in a few months as funds run dry.

This idea, while not my original creation, is one I have seen used in other places, which I thought would be fun. Rather than asking a question and having others post the answer, then another question - you post an answer, somebody provided the question, then gives another question. Kinda like Jeapordy. One other thing, the answers & questions are not meant to be taken to seriously - let your imagination soar. Let me give a few past examples to get things started.
 
Answer: 97.5
 
Question: What is the aprroximate size, in astronomical units, of Bill Clinton's libido?
 
Answer: Prof. Plum, in the study, with the rope.
 
Question: What is only slightly less kinky than Ms. Scarlet, in the bedroom with the candlestick.
 
Answer: A Canadian Moose, but not George W. Bush.
 
Question: Out of this pair, who is more likely to know the Capital of Canada?
 
Ok, then. Let us get started with the question for this answer:
 
Answer: Orcs, Elves and Donald Duck.

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
Umm, was I the only person whose password was mangled beyond redemption and had to be reset (at a cost of much screaming, profanity and marital discord at 6:00 am this morning -- I'm sorry, Sweetie, but you know that once the profanity begins your voice of reason gets shouted down. It's not your fault, and I never meant to imply that it was), or are the powers that be simply out to get me and I have to watch my back now?
 
Just curious.

Q: How do you define the Garden of Neutrality?
 
A: Never again.... well, maybe.